The Truth About Ellen: A feel-good romantic comedy

by Sarah Louise Smith

  My heart sank as the passenger door opened. So he’d brought her. Felicity. Supermodel. Super beautiful. Super skinny. Super-fucking-dressed-to-kill. A slender leg with pointy heel was the first sign of her, and then she swiftly got out and tossed her blonde hair. I hated her already, and I didn’t even know why.

  They made their way to the front entrance. Just as they got near the building, Jasper looked right up at me. I smiled. He didn’t.

  “You ready?”

  Tom appeared in the bathroom door, hair wet, his jeans and shirt back on.

  “Jasper’s here,” I told him, resisting the urge to gulp.

  “Great.”

  Tom held out his hand and I took it. We were going to be fine. I was going to be fine. Everything was fine.

  We descended the stairs and saw Jasper and Felicity at the front desk. She glanced round and sneered at us, then faced forward again.

  “Jas!” Tom called. Jasper turned and grinned, and they had a manly hug.

  “Ellen, nice to see you again,” Jasper turned to me and kissed my cheek. Why did he have to smell so good?

  “You too, Jasper,” I said in his ear as he hugged me. For a split second I was worried he wasn’t going to let go. I heard Tom introducing himself to Felicity. Time slowed down. Surely, this hug was longer than it needed to be? I pulled away and Jasper looked at me, his eyes loaded with thoughts he wasn’t saying.

  “You guys get settled and we’ll see you in the Fallow Room in a bit then,” Tom said to Jasper, not seeming to notice the length of our hug. Maybe it’d only been a few seconds after all. I told myself to get a grip and stop seeing things that weren’t there.

  Jasper looked away from me and at Tom. “See you in a bit, mate.”

  Without an introduction I just nodded at Felicity who gave me a fake smile. They went off towards the stairs and Tom took my hand again.

  “Jasper’s being a bit intense,” Tom mumbled as we walked down a corridor. “Right, here we are.”

  Tom pushed open the door marked ‘Fallow’ and inside was a room laid out especially for the Four Apes reunion. The room was white with high ceilings, a fireplace, and grand curtains in teal and gold. There were several plump, cream sofas surrounding a large coffee table, on which sat pots of tea, cups, and biscuits. There was a doorway leading to another room which looked like it contained a dining table.

  There were manicured gardens outside and it all looked pretty, but I was more excited by the fact that Alex and George were sitting on opposite sofas.

  Three quarters of my favourite band were in the same room.

  “Hey guys,” Tom said, going to each of them and giving them a warm hug.

  George gave me a little hug too, and then Tom introduced me to Alex. Then the wives were introduced. I resisted the urge to tell Jane, George’s wife, that I had helped get her one-hit-wonder to number one back when she was famous for five minutes in the 90s, and gave a very polite hello to Alex’s wife Heidi, who looked vaguely familiar too.

  We sat while Tom poured us both some tea. The conversation resumed; they’d been talking about their kids when we’d arrived and it carried on in full flow without Tom or I having much to contribute. I wondered how long it’d take Jasper to appear.

  “So you saw Jasper recently I hear?” George finally changed the conversation topic and turned to Tom.

  “Yeah, it was nice. Broke the ice.”

  “He doesn’t drink these days, right?” Alex asked.

  “Nah. We stuck to lemonade.”

  Everyone nodded in approval, me included. Heidi glanced at her watch.

  “He’s late,” she mentioned. “Do you think he’ll turn up?”

  “Oh, he’s here,” I told them. “We just saw them.”

  “I am here!” Jasper said, flinging the door open as if he was the main star of the show. Which he was, or used to be. But still, he could’ve been more humble.

  The three men on the sofas jumped up and went over to him. They had some sort of weird group hug, which looked awkward and they all laughed. I saw Jane roll her eyes.

  I was here. I’d witnessed it. Four Apes were back in the same room together.

  Chapter Thirty

  Felicity came and joined us on the sofas and beguiled us with tips about doing our nails while the men sat by the window, chatting.

  Although, in fact, Felicity’s nails were beautiful, and her tips really quite useful, I had one ear on the guys’ conversation. Jasper was talking about how long he’d wanted to get them back together in the same room, and how sorry he was for all the ‘shit that went down’ – a rehearsed speech perhaps, but it sounded heartfelt and genuine and the other three were responding well.

  “Lunch is served,” called a voice which seemed to come from nowhere and we turned to see a suited waiter standing in the doorway to the dining room.

  “I’m just going to pop to the bathroom,” I told Jane quietly as they all made their way to eat.

  I slipped out of the room, and finally let the big grin spread over my face. This was pretty cool. I must have been the luckiest Four Apes fan in the world.

  I did my business and then stared at my face in the mirror as I washed my hands; I had to play this cool. I had to be calm and collected and not let the inner excited fan out. It was just Tom. My Tom. And three friends.

  Three friends who’d joined forces with him to sell millions of records.

  Calm, Ellen. Calm.

  I took a deep breath, composed myself and walked out of the door and straight into Jasper.

  He appeared to have been waiting for me.

  “Oh hey, how are you?” I asked awkwardly.

  “I’ve decided not to tell Tom,” he said, his voice cold.

  “Oh, okay,” I said, not realising it’d really been an option. “Thank you.”

  “I don’t see that it’d do any good.”

  “No. Well, thanks.”

  “I suppose you’re loving this, aren’t you?” A grin spread across his face.

  “It’s pretty cool, but I’m here as Tom’s partner, not as a Four Apes fan.”

  The grin dropped.

  “He’s a lucky man.”

  “Well, thanks.” I swallowed hard. “Shall we go through? I mean, they’ll be waiting for us.”

  His blue eyes were mesmerizing. Once again his spell was surrounding me and I didn’t want it to burst. I blinked a few times and thought of Tom.

  “Jasper?”

  He nodded and turned, and then held the door open for me. I walked swiftly through the room and into the dining area, where everyone was assembled. I took a seat opposite Tom, leaving an empty one next to me for Jasper to sit opposite Felicity. I’d thought he was right behind me but he appeared a few seconds later and took his seat. I felt his leg lightly touch mine as he sat, and I moved it away.

  Lunch was soup followed by a selection of cold meats, bread, cheese and salad. There were a couple of bottles of white wine being passed around, and everyone but Jasper had some. He requested the waiter bring him a coke.

  We all tucked in while the guys talked about the old days, recording music, touring, TV appearances, fans, other bands, festivals… I loved hearing their stories and anecdotes and I was pretty sure Heidi and Jane did too; we fell silent and watched our men talking. Felicity mostly tapped her long nails on her phone and didn’t seem interested. She’d been a bit rude overall, like she looked down on everyone… she definitely wasn’t good enough for Jasper and I wondered if I’d have the courage to tell him so. I’d always spoken straight with him in the past, after all and this wine was making me feeling as bold as ever.

  After some strawberry cream tarts, we moved back into the first room while the table was cleared. Alex suggested a walk around the grounds; the sun was shining and it seemed a shame not to venture outdoors.

  Tom and I went to get our jackets, and he was visibly buzzing.

  “This is great, even better than expected,” he said as we reached our room.

  “I’
m so glad you’re having a good time,” I told him. “It’s been fun for me too.”

  “I never would have come without you, so thanks for encouraging me.”

  I smiled, proud of myself for making a difference and passed him his jacket.

  Back by the entrance, we met the others again and set off down a stony path that led into some woods. Heidi and Jane were walking up ahead, obviously good friends for some time, arms linked. Tom and Alex were chatting and broke off a little and that left me with George, Jasper, and Felicity. The first two were talking about Jasper’s latest album which he said would be out in time for Christmas, and the latter kept sighing and huffing. I suspected it was because the ground was slightly muddy and ruining her designer shoes. Jasper seemed to ignore her and that only made her sigh louder. I found it quite amusing.

  It wasn’t long before the others were quite far ahead. Felicity was going so slowly, and I didn’t feel I could just march off and leave her, and neither did Jasper despite the fact he wasn’t acknowledging her huffs.

  “Ouch, these shoes hurt,” George said after a while, leaning against a tree and pulling his shoe off.

  Felicity’s face lit up. “Maybe we should turn back,” she said, in her best princess voice. I glanced at Jasper and he rolled his eyes. I suppressed a giggle.

  “Eugh, that’s the worst blister I’ve ever seen!” Felicity said, turning away. I couldn’t resist a look. It was pretty disgusting. And it looked really, really sore.

  “I’m going to have to head back,” George admitted. He looked ahead, trying to spot the others, but the trees were too thick.

  “You head back,” said Jasper, “and we’ll catch up with the others and see you back in a bit, yeah?”

  “Sure.”

  “I’ll go back with you,” Felicity said, turning instantly to walk with George.

  “Oh, I’ll come with you guys then,” I said quickly, wanting to avoid another intense conversation with Jasper.

  “No, come with me,” Jasper said, pulling my arm. “They’ll be fine and Tom will want you to catch up with him.”

  Felicity shrugged and started walking back much quicker than she’d managed on the way out, George hobbling behind her.

  “Alone at last,” Jasper whispered, letting go of my arm and continuing the way we came.

  I didn’t reply, but picked up the pace. Surely we could catch up with the others quite quickly now.

  “You not talking to me?”

  “I just don’t have anything much to say,” I told him.

  “You’re usually chatty with me.”

  “Usually? This is the third time we’ve met.”

  He laughed. “I guess that’s true.”

  “Do you miss your dad?”

  I didn’t know where it’d come from, it just popped out.

  “Of course.”

  I glanced at him. The cocky grin had gone and he was looking confused. “What made you think of him?”

  “He’d be proud of you. I mean, not just for all your success, but going teetotal. Giving up smoking. All that.”

  “Thank you. I think you’re right.”

  “But Felicity—”

  “Ah, here comes the Ellen I know and love.”

  “Know and love?”

  “I know you pretty well. We spent a whole night talking remember.”

  “Seven years ago.”

  “You haven’t changed. So come on, tell me, you hate her, right? Jealous?”

  “No!”

  Although I was, to be honest, just a little bit.

  “Well then, spit it out.”

  “She’s nice. But she’s not right for you. You know that surely?”

  He stopped walking.

  I carried on a few steps, then turned to look at him.

  He was just staring at me, and I couldn’t read what he was thinking.

  “I do know that,” he said eventually.

  “Good,” I said, turning on my heel and continuing to walk. He started again and stepped into pace beside me.

  “Can I ask you something?”

  “Of course.”

  “Why are you so brutally honest with me, yet you hide things from Tom?”

  “I don’t ‘hide things’,” I said, stepping carefully over a fallen log. “I met him in a hotel, and didn’t expect to see him again after the weekend was over.”

  “This sounds familiar.”

  “The difference is, he called me. And things got serious fast. It seemed too late then to tell him I’d been a massive Four Apes fan.”

  “But why didn’t you tell him in the first place?”

  “What does that matter?”

  “I want to know.”

  I looked up ahead, hoping for salvation, but I couldn’t see the others anywhere.

  “I guess I wanted to play it cool.”

  “But why. He might have been flattered.”

  “I don’t know.”

  “Yes you do.”

  “Jasper, you’re so annoying.”

  He stopped, grabbed my arm and spun me around to face him.

  “What?” I said, refusing to look at his eyes so staring at the fallen leaves at our feet instead.

  “You do know. Admit it.”

  I tried to think, tried to realise what it was he was trying to make me see. Then I knew it. I looked up at him.

  “Because I told you, and you never called. I didn’t want to screw it up again.”

  A smile spread across his face.

  “I knew it.”

  I turned and carried on walking, picking up the pace, wondering how we’d got left so far behind. Were they speed walking or something?

  “But Ellen, listen, you didn’t screw up. I wanted to call. I didn’t care that you were a fan, I didn’t care about that at all. I wanted to see you again. You have to believe me.”

  “I believe you,” I told him, not sure that I did, and still walking quickly. “But it doesn’t matter now. It was a long time ago.”

  “And now you’re with Tom.”

  “Yes I am.”

  “My best friend.”

  “Who, until recently, you didn’t call for ten years.”

  “You really don’t like it when someone doesn’t call do you?”

  “I don’t like it when people break promises.”

  “Sometimes it’s impossible to keep. Like when you lose a phone.”

  I didn’t have anything more to say, so I kept walking, unsure what direction we were headed in and with no idea where this conversation could possibly end up.

  “Ellen.”

  I carried on.

  “Ellen.”

  I spun around. He’d stopped again. I looked down at the leaves.

  “Jasper, please stop this.”

  “Ellen, listen. I love Tom. But you have to know, that I like you. I liked you then, and I like you now and if you weren’t with him, and we met again, then things would be different.”

  I looked up at the blue eyes staring at me.

  “Different?” I asked, not knowing whether to leap into the arms of the man in front of me or run to the one up ahead somewhere.

  “I would call you tomorrow. And every day after that.”

  I put my hands on my hips.

  “Why?”

  “Because I just said, I like you.”

  “No. Because I was there the night before you lost your father. I helped you through something tough and so you’ve got some sort of emotional attachment. You don’t know me, Jasper.”

  He laughed and shook his head.

  “I do. I know you enough. And you know me. There’s a chemistry here, don’t deny it.”

  I couldn’t, so I kept quiet.

  He stepped towards me.

  “The fact that I care about Tom is the only thing stopping me from kissing you right now.”

  I had to be honest.

  “The fact that I care about Tom is the only thing that’s stopping me from letting you.”

  He smiled.


  “So what are we going to do?”

  “Nothing.”

  “You can’t tell me that. I can’t do nothing.”

  “Well, you’ll have to.”

  “I can’t.”

  He reached out and took my hand and squeezed it.

  “I know I’m probably not your dream guy, despite the childhood crush you might have had. I know I’ve got a crazy life and I know I’ve done some stupid things. But I’ve grown up a lot lately. I’m clean. And I felt we connected that night. I’ve never felt so connected to anyone.”

  I felt a tear roll down my cheek. I wasn’t sure where it had come from, or if it was sadness or happiness or fear, but suddenly both eyes were watery.

  “It was an amazing night, Jasper, but—”

  “No buts. I’m going to make it simple. You have a choice to make. I’ll leave you alone, let you have some space, but I want you to remember that night, and remember that next morning we had, and I want you to really think hard about Tom and then let me know. Because ever since that morning when I woke up with you in my arms, I’ve known you’re the only girl for me.”

  Chapter Thirty-One

  The morning after I’d slept with Jasper, I woke up with my head on his chest and his arms around me. We were both naked, and there was just a slither of bright light coming in from between the curtains. I smiled to myself as images from the night before started coming back to me. Then my thoughts turned to his father, and I sent up a silent prayer that he was still going to make it and see him before he passed away.

  “Good morning beautiful,” came a familiar voice. “I can feel your eyelashes on my chest as you blink.”

  “Good morning, Jasper.” I looked up at him and smiled.

  “You’re so cute.”

  He put the tip of his forefinger on my chin and moved it up so that he could kiss me on the lips. I still couldn’t believe this was happening. He was so different to what I imagined; so much more easy to talk to, so easy to be around. I had no nerves this morning. He was just Jasper, I was just Ellen. Two ordinary people. Hearts beating, lungs breathing, bodies slightly sticky. Two human beings. Not one Rock God and one mere mortal. Just me and him. Him and me. Cosy under this luscious duvet.