MATCH CITY

by Megan Kreuger

  My face is the same aside from the wound; they’ll most likely repair it, which will give me a week longer in the infirmary for observation. There’s a slight ache in my back, too, wonder what that is…

  I go to sleep.

  Seven days later, I’m finally released. Dr. Mann led my reconstructive surgery, and the scar is almost completely removed. I requested he leave some scarring across my ear and a half-inch on my upper-cheek as a reminder, a token of sorts, of what happened. With permission from the Council and Broadcasting Team, he complied. “Ursa often request this,” Dr. Mann said.

  I like my scar.

  Some people in the service industry took my belongings and gifts home for me, so I exit the infirmary with just the clothes I wore to the Saevas breach. My shirt is shredded down one side, but it’s cold today, so the rips get covered anyway by my regular white faux-fur coat.

  A stupor clouds my mind, and I feel really slow, maybe from the pain medication. I wait patiently for the Skytrain in the icy wind. When it arrives, I see it’s packed to capacity with people. I notice Roman and December first. They stand up to greet me after I climb in.

  “Freya! They said you would be released today. We’ve been riding this route all day,” she says through tears. “I’m so sorry, Freya,” Roman says solemnly, stepping in front of December. “I completely misjudged the situation, and I had to let you know. I am sorry,” he says again.

  My feet don’t move, and nothing comes out of my mouth for a minute.

  “It’s okay, Roman. We’ll talk about it when I get back. It’s okay. I still would have gotten messed up either way,” I say, gently pushing passed him to take a seat in December’s row. The train is completely full, everyone gawks at me.

  December hugs me so tight it hurts. “Ouch,” I say and laugh. “I’m so happy you are alive. They would only let family in to see you! And no one said anything about where you went, and then finally it was announced that you were responsible for defeating the threat on your own, whatever it was. They did this whole broadcast on your life, and showed clips from your training. Freya, you are amazing!” She says, and hugs me again.

  I still don’t know what to say, so I just hug her and remain silent. “Freya— we had a gathering while you were in the hospital.”

  “Okay,” I chuckle softly. There’s one every week; what’s her point?

  “Apollo was there, and…” she pauses and leans in to whisper softer. “Yeah, everyone would be. It’s mandatory, “I mumble, still confused. “No, he was a mess. He lost weight. He looks like garbage. He didn’t talk to anyone, didn’t smile. Castor was openly upset, and everyone made such a big deal about him. They were asking him questions about you, since you are engaged…” she trails off.

  I don’t say anything. “I still can’t believe you are engaged to Castor,” she says. Her voice drops into an even quieter whisper. “I really think Apollo was tormented about you getting hurt. There are already rumors that his behavior was about you,” she says.

  “We don’t have anything. It’s nothing,” I say. She glares at me with a look that says “Don’t lie to me.” “Really, we don’t,” I repeat.

  “Castor is gorgeous and women have always been obsessed with him just as much as Apollo, and he has the position, but I just didn’t think you were interested in him,” she says. I look around. “Where is he anyway?” I say.

  “Where’s who?” Roman asks from the seat across from us, eyeing us absent-mindedly. “Where’s Castor?” I ask louder.

  “He had watch today, otherwise he would be here,” Roman says. Like magic, my wrist illuminates with a message from Castor.

  “Speak of the devil,” I say.

  Freya, I heard they released you today.

  I wish I could be there. I’m on the watch you had for your first.

  I’ve missed seeing you, Beautiful.

  I’m glad you are okay.

  Meet me for dinner at Rome, possibly tonight if you feel up to it,

  Please

  -Castor Quinn

  I’ll wait to respond when I get home.

  The Skytrain arrives at my building and December hugs me again. “I’ll see you at the gathering tomorrow? Or are they letting you skip it?”

  “I can’t skip it,” I say. “We’ll probably have to announce our engagement.”

  She straightens her mouth in a display of empathetic concern, and then softly says, “Bye,” under her breath.

  “Bye.” Glancing at Roman, “Bye,” I say and nod to everyone else who came to see me home, including Brock, Nash, Ophelia, Calisto, and some others.

  The noticeable temperature drop causes me to secure my coat tighter once my boots hit the icy terrace. The Sky pulls away, causing my hair to whip wildly in the wind, sending goosebumps up my neck with an assaulting chill.

  “Finis Est Initium” I read aloud to myself from the familiar, deteriorating sign that hangs from the building closest to the center of the City.

  “Freya,” a tormented, but familiar, deep voice says from underneath our awning.

  I can’t move.

  Minutes seem to pass before I slowly walk toward the shadows, to see if the voice was real.

  His strong arms and chest slouch over in a defeated-looking posture. With his chin tilted down, he gazes up at me from beneath those menacing arched-brows. I can see he’s been suffering; he’s lost weight, but I’m too scared of rejection to open up to him. I don’t know how to act.

  He got what he wanted; I’m engaged to Castor. What does he want from me? I feel so much heartache at the sight of him.

  So I stand out in the cold a little longer before finally looking down and taking the first courageous step forward, breaking free from his distressing gaze eating at my insides. Another gust of cold air blows the blond hair over my shoulder. The frosty air makes its way into my heavy coat, causing me to shiver violently. Apollo grimaces and glances away, like he doesn’t want to see me shudder. He takes more steps backward, regressing deeper into the shadows.

  He moves slowly around the corner of my building, around to the area of our balcony that is safe from prying eyes, mimicking my pace as I gradually make my way to him.

  Taking the final step around the corner, I clasp my arms around myself, still shaking from the cold. As soon as we are completely out of sight, Apollo aggressively scoops me up in his arms and spins me around against the wall of my building. He holds me tight against his chest for a few seconds, and I let him. Of course, I let him. I love him.

  He pushes my hair back, and I can feel him looking around my head and body quickly. He’s checking for more injuries. I don’t look up at him yet. He is still holding me, savoring the moment. He runs his hands through my hair and down my back. Touching my neck tenderly, he slides his hand up to lift my chin, forcing me to look at him.

  His perfect face is angled down to look into my eyes; the scar across his arched-brow gives him his usual beautiful but intimidating stare, his chiseled jaw is more pronounced than ever, the blue of his eyes are so solid and pure, perfectly accentuated by those dark black lashes, and I struggle to breathe.

  As soon as he gets me to look at him, it’s obvious he can’t fight the desire anymore. The hand under my chin suddenly trails to the back of my head and he pulls me greedily to his lips. We suddenly fall into a passionate frenzy. He kisses me hungrily, like he’s waited his entire life for this. The fear of being caught leaves my mind as I am swept up in his arms, his mouth tasting mine.

  Both of his hands passionately tousle my hair before coursing down my back. He drops his hands quickly to the back of my thighs. Picking me up, he wraps my legs around his muscular waist. I lock my ankles behind him. He presses me hard against the wall to free his hands, so they can return to exploring my body. His ravenous mouth disappears from my lips as he grazes down my neck and collarbone.

  I realize we have to stop.

  It takes everything I have to uncoil my legs and push him off of me.

  We are both breath
ing offensively loud as we struggle to compose ourselves, still staring ardently. Moving backwards, I stop against the wall and check our surroundings before turning back to him.

  “What are we doing?” I ask, heatedly.

  He’s still breathing hard when he moves toward me again. My hand lifts and rests on his chest, keeping him safely at a distance.

  “I didn’t even know you were missing until I saw the broadcast of Roman bringing you home.” He closes his eyes in pain before looking at me again. “Baby, I should have been there,” he says, in his deep, overpowering voice.

  I touch my forehead with both hands, maddened with defeat. “Stop it,” I say softly, as I slide down the wall to sit. Apollo wastes no time and crouches down in front of me, resting his hands together like he always does.

  “What are we doing?” I say again. He breathes out hard and ignores the question. “I’ve never been so scared in my life,” he says.

  “I’m engaged to Castor.”

  He furls his brow in anger at the name and rubs his forehead, like he’s erasing the pain. “I know.”

  “Tell me what I’m supposed to do because I don’t know what you want from me. I thought I had everything under control. You wouldn’t even look at me and I did what we said I should do,” I say.

  “I know, damn it,” he says again, his tormented expression grows more distressed.

  “We have to announce the engagement tomorrow.” Apollo doesn’t acknowledge this. He reaches up and touches my cheek, massaging the scar with the side of his thumb. “This should never have happened,” he says, softly.

  “I went off the grid,” I respond, ignoring him this time.

  He stares at me with a flicker of hope in his eyes before blinking and becoming frustrated again. “I can’t believe they left you.” He shakes his head in anger before pausing to lean forward and kiss me again, but I put my finger to his lips. “I couldn’t get any reception once I got passed the wheat dome.”

  His mouth tightens with an escaped grin, and he moves his head sideways slightly to get my fingers away from his mouth. “Freya—

  Look what happened to you. This is exactly what I was talking about,” his voice gentle.

  “What? I’m fine.”

  “They brought you back unconscious.”

  “I was just tired from staying up all night,” I say and he laughs softly.

  “When Roman said you went in the Durus forest, I didn’t believe you were defecting.”

  “I wasn’t. I followed a few Saevas hoping to see where they were coming from.” He stares at me in fascination.

  “What?” I ask, curiously.

  “Maryn did the same thing. He thinks they’re coming from beyond Durus.”

  “He went through the forest?”

  “Yeah, he said when you make it through to the other side there are cliffs that block the view of anything. He said those Cliffs might be where they are coming from.” “Wait, he made it through?” I question, suddenly upset I fell in a stupid hole.

  Apollo lifts his eyebrow and smiles, entertained by my reaction. “Yes.” “And no one left him?” I antagonize.

  “I was flying, so absolutely not,” he confirms, responding with the same sarcasm and touching my face again.

  “But I need you to understand why we can’t leave together.”

  “What?” I almost shout, becoming angry again. “Then what are we doing? I’d rather take my chances out there than get caught doing whatever we are doing here and get executed for sure.”

  “Freya, it’s easy to be smug when we live in this City. Our lives are privileged. You’ve never had to hunt or grow food, use weapons without unlimited ammunition, or feel vulnerable or scared of Saevas every second of your life. You want children?

  Why would you want to give birth in freezing temperatures or scorching heat without any kind of basic survival skills? The Creators manage every aspect of our lives, and it’s always been so they can keep us here,” he says, his face handsome but always daunting when he lectures me.

  “You think the wall is there to protect you, but it’s there to keep you here.

  I want a life for you, but that doesn’t mean that I’m not tortured, that it’s easy for me. I don’t have an answer, but I can’t eat or sleep. Seeing Castor holding your hand was the worst moment of my life.” He pauses. “Well, that was before I saw the footage from the hover-craft the morning they brought you back. I was going to kill Roman when I found out he made the call to leave. But with you recovering well, I tried to hide how I was feeling so it wouldn’t fall back on you.”

  Apollo finally drops his muscular body to the ground and slides over to sit next to me. “December said everyone is already talking. She said there are rumors that your weight loss and—depression were because of me.

  If you don’t want to leave with me, to go and see if there is anything out there for us, a life—then we have to stop doing this, Apollo.”

  Apollo’s face is hard and unreadable. Leaning in, his face is present but his eyes are lost in the distance, contemplating our situation. He looks like he’s been struggling hard. There are dark circles under his eyes, and his cheeks are sunken in.

  “I love you,” I say, realizing his pain and how much he loves me. “Maybe I could ask the Creators if we could go through the Scanner, just to see our results.”

  “Naw, they’d kill me,” he says without hesitation.

  “What if we just went through on our own?”

  “No, your results are flagged. They’ll send them to the Council no matter what.”

  “But by then, we’ll already have the results and can petition with a geneticist. If the results are good enough,” I say.

  Apollo’s expression grows even more serious. “The Council is pairing me and Andromeda. Her Father is on the Council. Everyone with perfections is going to be paired with Council member’s kids.” My stomach hurts even more. Now I’m the one who stares, stunned and disordered, from too much stress.

  “I’m sorry,” is all I can say. We sit silently for a minute, Apollo holds my hand.

  “There’s something I want to tell you…” Apollo’s blue-eyes lock fervently with mine. “I might leave the City—with or without you,” I say calmly.

  “You’re not leaving,” he says sternly, growing angry. “I’m not going to let you go die.” “It’s not your choice,” I state firmly, the wind hiding our voices, howling against the awning.

  Apollo’s raises an eyebrow and stares at me furiously. “You would rather watch me pair with Castor than let me leave, let me be free?” I utter in disbelief.

  “One scenario doesn’t leave you dead.”

  “Yes it does!” I shout. “I’ll be dead inside if I’m forced to pair with Castor.”

  Apollo sits back against the wall, the muscle in his cheeks spasm from his frustration. I can see he needs a minute before responding.

  “My father and I don’t have a relationship. He always used my brother and me to get ahead. My mother and brother are gone. My brother is out there, and he’s alive. I know he is. And I’m going to find the Saevas like he originally wanted to. I’m going to find out where they are coming from and I’m going to end them all.”

  Resting on my bended legs, my eyes remain forward. Apollo leans closer to me, moving around in front of my face so my eyes shift to focus on his face. He isn’t angry. Instead, affection and warmth radiate from his eyes. “I love you so much. Do you know that?” His voice is so crisp and deep, the sound I love most.

  “You hurt me,” I mutter, not realizing I was still holding on to the pain.

  “That’s the last thing I ever wanted to do.” He touches my cheek and kisses me softly, but I lean away before it goes any further. “I thought I was doing the right thing…letting you go.” His face remains leaned in and frozen, but he smiles when I look back at him. “The Skytrain will be back in a few minutes. If it’s empty, you should go,” I say. I don’t want to have this conversation anymore.

 
“I’ll figure something out, Freya.”

  “Castor and I have to announce tomorrow—

  “I know,” he says.

  “And I’m seeing him tonight.”

  Apollo looks like someone slapped him. “He can touch you now that you are engaged.” Inflicted with sudden pain, his usual confident and strong countenance is torn. The big strong, masculine Ignis player appears helpless and looks pale.

  “I don’t have to let him,” I console.

  “It doesn’t really work like that,” he says firmly, trying to enlighten my naivety. “You’re expected to be affectionate,” his voice cracks at the word.

  “What am I supposed to do?” A teardrop accidentally escapes and rolls down my cheek. He wipes it away before I can react to it. We hear the Skytrain.

  “Are you going to check it?” He asks, quietly. I stand up and round the corner hastily to check for passengers before I miss it. As I step out from under the awning, my Father is stepping down from the platform of the Skytrain. “Freya? Did you wait for me out here?” “Just for one round, my train was the last one,” I say. “Oh—well let’s get inside, it’s freezing.”

  When his back is turned to scan his bracelet to our door, I hurry and press the hold button on the side of the outer doors of the Sky, giving Apollo an additional two minutes. Pushing behind my father to get him to hurry, we make it into our entryway. I block the door, confirming that my Father is heading toward the kitchen.

  I turn and gaze into Apollo’s faultless sapphire eyes as he walks toward me from the end of our terrace, headed toward the empty train. His stare is almost obsessive and sick with desire. The yearning is intoxicating; the need to be together is drowning us. The painful ache in my chest urges me to drop the door. I know he wants to say something to me about Castor. But I scan my wrist, and the door drops shut.

  17

  I step outside of my building. It’s not as cold as it was earlier, but I can still see an icy vapor when I breathe out. The Skytrain takes me to Rome, the pairing restaurant. Castor didn’t ride the train to meet me like Phoenix had done. Another mental note I tally against him.