Control

by Crissy Smith

  Kieran closed his eyes. The Alpha had a point. The shifters would be able to move faster and better in their animal form. He just didn’t know if he could handle being around so many in their other forms. When he was hunting or working and came across his prey in their animal forms, he had no problem because he planned on taking them out. While he wasn’t comfortable with Remy’s wolf, he didn’t freak and attack him either. But he didn’t know how he would react to Dakota. What if he had a bad reaction to her jaguar and she finally realized how much better she could do than him?

  Damn it, life had been so much simpler when he didn’t care what other people thought of him.

  “Hey,” Dakota said as she slipped her hand in his. “It’s okay. We’ll stay human.”

  “No,” Kieran said before he even had time to think about what he was saying. “We knew I’d have to meet your jaguar eventually.”

  “Not like this,” she said quietly.

  “Uh,” Remy said loudly. “Let’s give them a minute.”

  Kieran was glad Remy understood and shuffled the others away. He turned to Dakota and cupped her face. “You need to do this.”

  “I don’t want to lose you.”

  “You won’t,” he assured her. “I may be an asshole most of the time, but even I know you’re the best thing that ever happened to me. It’s time I accepted every part of you.”

  She stared into his eyes as though she was looking for any deceit in his words. Kieran simply looked right back at her. “You’re sure?”

  “Yes,” he told her. “Yes.”

  Dakota rose to her tiptoes and kissed him deeply. He wrapped his arms around her and let her ravage his mouth. All he could do now was pray this wasn’t the last time he tasted her.

  She pulled back slowly. “Okay.”

  It was the hardest thing she’d ever done. Dakota strolled away from Kieran to prepare for her shift. All of the times she had pictured sharing her jaguar with Kieran and the circumstances she’d thought up had never been like this.

  Jackson stood with his two guys and Gabe and all the shifters separated to transform on their own. Away from the others, she had to keep her mind on the task at hand. She couldn’t worry about Kieran’s reaction. If he rejected her jaguar, then she was sure they would never recover.

  The past month wouldn’t mean a thing. He would leave her, probably leave Las Vegas, and she would never see him again. That would actually be better than having to see him every day and not being able to touch him.

  She started to undress, not really worrying about whether or not anyone was watching. As a young shifter, she’d learned early on that she couldn’t always pick the time or place where she would transform.

  It was one of the only lessons she’d learned from her family.

  The Reese clan could be traced back to the beginning of time. Sure, the name changed, evolved, to fit into the world around them. But as one of the founding families of the Organization, they were proud of their history, so it was easy for Dakota to research.

  It wasn’t easy believing in what her company did while at the same time hating them for it.

  From birth her mother and father had been cold and distant to her. Later, when her parents had given birth to her younger siblings, she hadn’t understood why they accepted and loved the other children but not her.

  Or she hadn’t understood until her uncle, one she’d never seen before, who’d never been spoken of, had come to her house and told her about her destiny.

  Destiny, she scoffed. She hadn’t had a choice. As the first-born child, she belonged to the Organization, not her family.

  When they’d thought she was ready, two men had arrived to take her away. She’d begged her parents to save her, not to let the man remove her from her home and family, but they’d turned their backs and allowed Dakota to be removed from the only home she’d ever known.

  They’d rejected her.

  If Kieran did the same, she wasn’t certain she would ever recover. She’d made a family with the agents she’d grown up with and saw daily. Even then she’d kept herself removed from everyone else. Not to the extent of Kieran, but Dakota was very much alone.

  Even Dean, who’d been her partner for years, had found it easy to leave her side and go hide in a lab every day. Their bond hadn’t been enough to keep him with her.

  So, really, what was she expecting from Kieran?

  Of course he was going to end up leaving her. No one ever stayed.

  “Stop!”

  Dakota whirled around and almost stumbled. Kieran was only a few feet away. “What?”

  “Stop thinking whatever you are,” Kieran demanded. “I can sense something’s wrong.”

  She’d already removed her shirt and pants and stood before him in only her bra and panties. “Yeah, sure.”

  “I mean it.” He stepped closer. “This isn’t going to change anything.”

  Oh, God, she really did want to believe him. “Okay.”

  “Stop telling me what you think I want to hear! Yell, scream, blame me! Question me!”

  “We don’t have time for this,” she said, turning her back.

  “I don’t care.” He grabbed her to spin her back around. “I’ll admit I have doubts about myself.”

  “You lied to me earlier. You said you were sure we’d be okay, but you didn’t mean it. Not really,” she accused.

  “Yes,” Kieran said. “I’m worried I’ll attack you.”

  “You wouldn’t,” she argued.

  “I might,” Kieran said. “Neither of us know what’s going to happen in the next few minutes. But I have to believe, at least in my heart, nothing is going to change. That we’ll get through this and be better for it.”

  Dakota blew out a breath. Okay, she needed to stop feeling sorry for herself. Her life wasn’t bad, not really, and she had been so happy for the last month. At least she’d had that time with Kieran.

  “Shift for me,” Kieran urged.

  Instead of moving away from him again, Dakota pulled off the rest of her clothes and crouched. She kept her gaze on Kieran as she called her jaguar forward.

  The change washed over her with a familiar wave of power. She fell to the ground as her arms shortened then grew fur. The black spots stood out against the tan pelt on her back.

  “Holy shit!” Kieran dropped to his knees in front of her.

  Dakota had not expected that reaction. He was already reaching out toward her. She flattened herself to the ground, hoping if she wasn’t showing any signs of aggression, he might come closer. She wanted his hand on her. She’d never felt his touch in her animal form.

  “You’re beautiful,” he murmured.

  She scooted forward a little, laying her chin on her paws.

  “Can I touch you?” he asked.

  They probably should have talked about that before she shifted. Dakota loved to be petted. She nodded her head, hoping he understood.

  Kieran’s first brush over her head was tentative, but when Dakota didn’t move, he simply laid his palm on her. She closed her eyes and just breathed in relief. She wished, wished so much, she could pull his scent into her and hold it forever, but he didn’t have one. That had never bothered her before that moment.

  “I’m not afraid or angry,” Kieran said. “I know it’s you.”

  She made a sound that would probably come across as a grunt and he laughed. Wow, she loved that sound. Even though they’d been together almost a month, she very rarely heard him laugh and it was usually during one of their fun and rowdy sex sessions.

  “Everything okay?” Jackson called out.

  Dakota wanted to roar at Jackson for interrupting them, but didn’t want to scare Kieran. Instead she climbed onto her four paws and stretched out her back.

  “Fine,” Kieran hollered back. “Come on, kitten.”

  She took a swipe at him with her massive claw, but he stepped easily away. Around her the other shifters moved and her instincts kicked in.

  With a roar, she le
apt in front of Kieran, blocking him from a dark wolf that was stalking toward her lover. The wolf stopped with his ears pinned to his head and his teeth bared.

  Dakota wasn’t afraid. A jaguar could easily beat this wolf. She was bigger and meaner.

  “No,” Kieran said as he grabbed the scruff of her neck.

  Dakota meowed before trying to get free. Why was he trying to protect the wolf? He was hers! She wasn’t going to share him.

  “You know Remy isn’t going to hurt me,” Kieran told her.

  She shook her head to clear the animal craving to attack. She did know Remy wasn’t a threat to Kieran, but she’d let herself forget about their mission and that wasn’t acceptable.

  When she tugged so he would release her, Kieran ran his hand over her head to her neck and patted.

  She trotted away past the wolf and a bear and stopped in front of the largest fucking wolf she’d ever seen. As big and bad as she was, this wolf was an Alpha. She lowered herself into a crouch before she remembered she knew this wolf too. It had to be Damon.

  It was unusual for her to get lost in her instincts as she was doing. She didn’t know what was going on, but something was weird. The Alpha relaxed as soon as she did and dipped his head in her direction.

  “Don’t forget to check in,” Jackson said as he stood next to the smaller wolf, Remy. “Call if you come across anything. If not, we’ll meet back at the hotel.”

  “Mine and Dakota’s room would be best,” Kieran said. “Hunt as long as you can, but be safe and don’t use all your energy. If we find them, we have to get everyone out safely.”

  “Let’s go find us some bad guys,” Jackson said.

  Dakota watched the other teams separate, leaving her with Kieran and the Alpha.

  “We’ve got the north section,” Kieran said. “Try to keep up.”

  Dakota didn’t understand until Kieran used his Walker speed and was gone. She grunted before taking off after him.

  Her paws barely hit the hard ground as she ran at full tilt. She could catch sight of him, but since she knew what direction he was headed in, she was able to really give the jaguar the freedom she rarely got anymore.

  Running in the city was regulated for the safety of shifters and humans. She still got to transform, but with other types of animals around, she couldn’t trust one not to attack her.

  Her natural tendency was to remain solitary except with her mate. She didn’t like to pick up the scents of others. Here, with Kieran so close, she was safe to enjoy the wind mussing her fur, and not holding back.

  Ahead she heard Kieran’s laughter and knew he was taunting her. So he thought he could beat her? Yeah, right. She spotted a tree that would take her up into the caverns of the mountain. Her jaguar might not be the best climber of the large felines, but she did okay. She really excelled in water, but there was none to be found around here.

  Dakota didn’t even slow as she reached the tree. Instead she leapt and landed on one of the thick branches. She ascended as far as she could until only a small gap between her and the ledge remained. She balanced for an instant then jumped, but landed exactly where she wanted. From the vantage point, she could see down below, where the wolf was scrambling to catch up. Where the hell was Kieran?

  “Over here, kitten.”

  Dakota swiveled around to see Kieran leaning against the mountain face with his arms crossed over his chest. She roared playfully at his nickname for her. She had a feeling it was going to stick.

  Chapter Five

  Kieran couldn’t believe that, instead of fear at Dakota’s roar, he was turned on by the sound. His life was just getting more and more complicated. Behind Dakota, the Alpha finally joined them.

  “I found our first cave,” Kieran announced. “From here on out we need to be silent.”

  Both animals nodded. Kieran grinned. Maybe he’d get Dakota to shift more often. He liked her not being able to argue. He spun on his heel and headed in the direction of the opening he’d seen a couple of minutes before.

  The jaguar and wolf moved almost silently as they followed. They were far enough away from the opening he’d seen that they didn’t really have to be quiet yet, but it was better since they didn’t know if the group they were searching for had guards. If they were smart, they would.

  Kieran used enough speed to move them quickly, but made sure both shifters were able to keep up with him. When he found what he was looking for, he crouched and waited. Dakota licked his arm when she reached him.

  “Let me go in first,” he told them. “You two stay at the opening. I can move faster and if no one is inside, then we can move on. If I think I’m not alone, I’ll call out for you.”

  The Alpha gave a low growl and Kieran took it he didn’t like that plan.

  “I doubt they have any Walkers working for them,” Kieran said. “Most shifters won’t even see me and we know they can’t smell me.”

  Dakota butted her head against his leg. It was amazing he was so close to the jaguar. He took her broad head in his hands and kissed her snout. She wrinkled her nose and it was so cute he smiled at her.

  “I’ll be back before you know it,” he promised.

  Kieran climbed to his feet and raced away. The gap in the mountain was about half his height and it would be hard to get people in and out, but that didn’t mean the shifter group didn’t enter in their animal form or use this as an emergency exit. He couldn’t take chances even if he didn’t think he was going to find anyone inside.

  The rocks under his feet crumbled and he slipped as he dropped down to his knees. He couldn’t believe he was crawling through a damn hole taking him into the dark. He fucking hated the dark.

  It seemed like an hour, although it couldn’t have been more than five minutes, before he broke through the tunnel. If he didn’t have Walker vision, he wasn’t sure he would have been able to see the small amount he could. It was pitch-black.

  Kieran placed his hand on the wall as he stood. There were no noises echoing around. He was even more certain this wasn’t going to lead anywhere, but he had to check. He slid his palm over the rough side of the mountain to keep his bearings.

  As he headed deeper into the shadows, it got colder and Kieran grew uncomfortable. He clenched his eyes tightly and tried to take deep breaths. He could feel his mind slipping back into the memories. He tried to fight them, but he knew he wouldn’t be able to.

  Kieran was sure this time he was going to die. He was strapped to a chair instead of a table. Every finger had been broken, his right hand smashed, and he’d suffered one of the worst beatings he’d gotten. The worst was they’d ripped out his fangs, again.

  “Why?” he managed to ask through his swollen mouth.

  The cackle sent a chill down his spine. “Because I can.”

  That was the answer he always got when he asked the question. He didn’t know how long he’d been held captive, but he was certain it had to be into years by now.

  “You do heal remarkably well,” the doctor told him.

  Kieran had no idea if the man really was a doctor, but that was what he called the hyena shifter. He loved to poke and prod Kieran as well as inject unknown substances. Kieran had figured out a long time ago they were testing him to see what he could and could not heal from. There were instances when they even gave him blood so his healing was sped up. Whatever suited their purposes at that moment.

  But he hadn’t had any blood for so long Kieran knew he was slowly dying. He had prayed the night before, alone and freezing in his cage, for his body to just give up.

  He wasn’t immortal, but he was damn hard to kill. The shifters were close to ending him though.

  “I’ve gotten more data from you than any of my other test subjects. Now I’m just trying to see how long you can last. It’s quite entertaining,” the doctor mused.

  Kieran was in so much pain he couldn’t even flinch when the doctor held a scalpel in front of him.

  “I do love to hear you scream, though,” the shift
er told him.

  He’d tried, he really had, but he did scream as the scalpel pierced his chest and set up a burning from the inside.

  “I treated the blade with a little something special for you,” the hyena doctor said.

  Kieran gritted his teeth and his vision wavered.

  “I think I’ll return you to your cell. I’ll check on you in about twenty-four hours. See if you’re still alive.”

  Kieran found himself on his knees gasping. The vision or memory was one of the strongest he’d suffered. It was also a reminder of one the worst nights of his life.

  Whatever the doctor had given him had eaten away at his insides as he lay curled up in his cage. He’d screamed. Begged them to kill him, but no one ever came. Not until days later.

  Kieran hadn’t been able to even raise his head when the shifters had picked him up and carried him into a filthy washing area. They’d dropped him onto the stained, broken tiles before turning on a hose with cold water above him. He hadn’t been warm after that until his rescue. Even the blood they’d given him hadn’t heated him at all.

  Bile rose and he lurched to the side before he vomited. Shit, this couldn’t be happening. He was finally happy and the memories were going to tear him apart.

  No, he wouldn’t let them. He was stronger than some fucked-up past. He’d made himself strong. He would never be a victim again, wouldn’t have to rely on another to rescue him. Kieran did the rescuing now and he was going to do his damn job.

  He climbed to his feet and rolled his shoulders. He was done cowering. It was time to bring Bradley and the other shifters to their knees. The doctor had never been found. Maybe once he found Alex, that was what he would do. Track down the fucker.

  It was time he was in charge of his own life again. For months, he’d let everyone dictate what was happening with him. Caspar had maneuvered him into coming to Las Vegas. He was working for Sparro just so he could keep in contact with Caspar and even being around Jackson was bringing up these painful memories. No more! He was in control of his life and it was time he proved it.

  Determination had him moving forward to check out this cave and move on to the next.