Northanger Abbey

by Val McDermid

  Cat was dismayed at this further misunderstanding. ‘Oh no, not at all. I mean, I did look back, but I was appalled, not cheerful. I begged Johnny to stop and let me out. As soon as I saw you, I told him. If he’d only done what I asked instead of taking off like a bat out of hell, I’d have run after you and we could have had our walk. I wouldn’t have offended you and Ellie for the world.’

  Her breathless entreaty would have charmed a harder heart than Henry Tilney’s. He shook his head indulgently and said, ‘Ellie was right. She insisted you’d never let us down deliberately. And we were horribly late, after all. Ellie blamed herself for putting the wrong number in her phone. She didn’t realise at first that she’d done it. She’d sent three or four texts before the other woman finally lost patience with her.’ He chuckled. ‘It was quite funny, really.’

  ‘Don’t say Ellie wasn’t angry, because I know she was. The man who answered your door—’

  ‘That’s Calman. He was my father’s batman in the army, now he’s our driver and man about the house.’

  ‘Calman,’ she said firmly, refusing to be diverted, ‘said your sister wasn’t in. And then, not five minutes later, she came out with your father. What’s that if it’s not being angry?’

  ‘Ellie told me. She was mortified in case you saw her leaving. But she was going to a private view with my father and he hates to be unpunctual. If she’d asked you in, he’d have been furious. If she was here, she’d tell you herself how sorry she is. But my father does rather rule the roost.’

  ‘So we’ve established that Ellie wasn’t cross with me. But you were.’

  He frowned. ‘I don’t know what you mean.’

  ‘You gave me such a black look from your box.’

  ‘If it was a black look, it was provoked by the dance, not you. Look, here I am. Would I have bothered to come round if I’d been angry with you?’

  She had to own he had a point. ‘So we’re all happy again?’

  He smiled. ‘Bloody delirious. So. When are we going to take this famous walk?’

  ‘Tomorrow?’

  He made a face. ‘The weather forecast says it’s going to be hot and sunny. I hate climbing hills when it’s hot, I get so uncomfortable and sweaty. Leave it with me, I’ll work something out with Ellie.’ They swapped phone numbers, both taking extreme care to enter the correct set of digits on their phones. ‘I’ll text you.’ And he was gone, slipping away as suddenly as he had arrived.

  Meanwhile, Martha Thorpe had opened the picnic basket she had brought with her and was handing round chilled canapés and individual cans of Pimm’s. ‘Just a little treat,’ she said. ‘We might as well make the most of the box while the crowds disperse.’

  Cat gave Susie a questioning glance. Even though the younger Thorpe girls were tucking into their Pimm’s, Cat knew she shouldn’t be drinking under age in a public place. The occasional ginger beer shandy over Sunday lunch was permissible, but she didn’t want to cause the Allens any difficulty.

  ‘Get stuck in, Cat,’ Mr Allen said. ‘There’s not enough alcohol in that to bother a toddler. I won’t tell if you don’t.’ And he graced her with that charming smile of his, the one that made her understand exactly how he talked people into multi-million-pound projects. ‘You sorted things out with young Henry, then?’

  Cat nodded. ‘I think so.’ Dreamily, she drifted across to the edge of the box and looked around the almost empty theatre. To her surprise, at the rear of the auditorium, she spotted John Thorpe deep in conversation with General Tilney, of all people. From the way they kept glancing up at the Allens’ box, she couldn’t help wondering if she was the subject of their conversation, though she couldn’t imagine why that might be. Cat did not consider herself to be that interesting.

  She turned away and allowed herself to be drawn into conversation with Jess and Claire Thorpe, although she had little to add to their discussion of the relative merits of TV reality-show winners. As Martha cleared away their impromptu picnic, another male figure filled the doorway. This one was less welcome, however; John Thorpe stood tapping his watch. ‘Come on, ladies, there’s gin to be drunk at the Pleasance.’

  In spite of her finest efforts, Cat couldn’t avoid John’s determined company as they made their way downstairs. ‘I saw you talking to General Tilney,’ she said, making the best of a bad job.

  ‘Amazing bloke. Fit, active. Looks as young as his sons.’

  ‘How do you know the General?’

  ‘How do I know the General?’ He gave her an incredulous look. ‘I said the other night, I was Freddie Tilney’s potboy at Fenners. He brought a bunch of us back to Northanger Abbey one Easter break. Three of his friends and us four potboys. I met the General then. And more recently, we’ve run into each other at the tables.’ He preened momentarily. ‘Playing poker, that was the last time. Down in London. I took him for a few quid and, fair play to him, he coughed up without a whimper. Rich as a Jew, so they say. And apparently he’s a real foodie. Not that I’ve ever managed to fiddle an invitation to dinner. Only a matter of time, though. Especially since he thinks you’re such a cracker.’

  ‘Me? You were talking about me?’

  ‘Absolutely. He thinks you’re quite the prettiest girl in town. And what do you think I said?’ He lowered his voice and murmured in her ear. ‘I said, “Well spotted, General, that makes two of us.” So I think that dinner invitation can only be a matter of time.’

  Cat was too busy considering the General’s opinion of her to notice the proprietary air of John Thorpe. He continued in the same vein of flattery, but she tuned him out as she had learned to do. All that mattered to Cat was that everything had been ironed out between her and the Tilneys. And, as it turned out, even the General liked her.

  Going to bed, she congratulated herself on turning things around. No more gloom and misery. Now she was her happy optimistic self again.

  Sorted.

  13

  As Henry had predicted, the following morning brought the kind of day that shows Edinburgh at its brilliant best. The sun brought warmth to grey stone that could otherwise look forbidding and the greenery of the trees and private gardens was a satisfyingly vivid contrast. Clearly it was not the sort of day to attract Henry to clambering up the slopes of Arthur’s Seat.

  Cat was not downhearted, however. She hugged the events of the previous evening close to her heart, happy at the prospect of seeing Henry again soon. Nothing could put a damper on her good spirits and she set off with Susie for the Book Festival full of cheerful anticipation. They had a sheaf of tickets for the day’s events, which included her mother’s favourite food writer. Cat had put enough money aside to buy his latest recipe book and she queued contentedly for half an hour in the heat to have it signed.

  Towards the end of the afternoon, Ellie texted her.

  Where r u?

  @ bookfest. Where u?

  Jst got bk 2 house. C u @ bookfest in 10?

  OK. Outside spiegeltent.

  When Ellie arrived, resplendent in a wide-brimmed hat, there was a brief moment of hesitation before they hugged and kissed each other on the cheek. ‘Henry explained,’ Ellie said.

  Cat laughed. ‘And Henry explained to me too. He should join the diplomatic service.’

  ‘Ha! You wouldn’t say that if you could hear him ranting about people who mess him about at work.’

  ‘I’m so glad we got everything sorted out.’

  ‘Me too. Let’s go and get an ice cream, I’m roasting.’ And so they linked arms and stood in line. After they’d been served, they sat down on the grass and savoured the sensual pleasure of cold vanilla on a hot afternoon. ‘Henry says it’s supposed to be cooler tomorrow,’ Ellie said. ‘He thought we could do the Arthur’s Seat walk in the morning. What do you think? Are you still up for it?’

  Cat nodded enthusiastically. ‘Totally. Henry’s right, it would have been a real slog doing it today in this heat. How early do you want to start?’

  ‘We’ll borrow the car a
nd pick you up at nine, if that’s OK?’

  ‘Perfect.’ She finished her ice cream and lay back on the grass. ‘This is the best time I’ve had in my whole life.’

  ‘Don’t you miss your family?’

  ‘A bit. But I don’t miss being in the Piddle Valley, where nothing ever happens.’

  Ellie snorted with laughter. ‘Every time you say that it makes me giggle. The Piddle Valley, for heaven’s sake.’

  ‘Northanger Abbey does sound much grander,’ Cat said wistfully.

  ‘You’ll come and visit, I know you will.’

  Before they could make further plans, a familiar booming voice assaulted their ears. ‘Here you are! Susie said you were kicking around somewhere. We’ve been all over the bloody Book Festival looking for you, Cat.’ John Thorpe loomed over her, blocking out the sun.

  Cat pushed herself up on one elbow. Her brother and Bella were by John’s side, gazing down at her. ‘It’s not like I was hiding,’ she muttered.

  Ellie stood up. ‘I’ll see you in the bookshop,’ she said, slipping away. Cat wished she could do the same.

  ‘We’ve rearranged the run out to Linlithgow and Glasgow for tomorrow,’ Bella said.

  Cat’s heart sank. ‘But Jamie’s car . . . Surely it’s not up to the journey?’ It was her last best hope.

  ‘It’s fine,’ her brother said. ‘It was just a busted radiator hose. It looked much more spectacularly worse than it was.’

  ‘I can’t go,’ Cat said, taking the bull by the horns. ‘The same reason I shouldn’t have gone before – I’ve just made an arrangement with Ellie to go walking with her tomorrow.’

  ‘Oh, for heaven’s sake, Cat. You can go walking any old day,’ Bella insisted. ‘Surely Ellie won’t mind if you swap days?’

  ‘We can go to Glasgow any old day.’

  ‘Possibly not,’ John butted in. ‘I might have to go back to London. Urgent business. And that would put the mockers on our little trip. I can definitely do tomorrow. But after that . . . ?’ He made a wiggling gesture with his hand, indicating uncertainty.

  ‘We need you to come, Cat, don’t let me down,’ Bella wheedled.

  ‘No. I’ve already messed Ellie around once, I won’t do it again.’

  ‘Just tell her you forgot you had a previous engagement.’

  ‘I’m not going to lie, Bella.’

  Bella pouted. ‘You’re my best friend, Cat. I’ve hardly seen you for days. I know you, you’re so sweet and kind, are you really going to make me suffer without you? I know you hate to let a friend down.’

  ‘Ellie’s my friend too, and I won’t let her down.’

  Bella tossed her head, her hair swinging about her shoulders. ‘Oh, is that how it is? Ellie Tilney’s your new best friend, is she? Even though you’ve only known her five minutes, I’m just chopped liver now. It’s Ellie this and Ellie that and Bella can go hang.’

  ‘You’re weirding me out, Bella.’ The extravagance of her friend’s protestations made Cat quite ill at ease.

  Bella’s bottom lip quivered and she clung to Jamie’s arm. ‘I can’t help it if I have such strong feelings for the people I love. I get jealous when I see myself pushed out because some stranger caught your eye. It’s only because I care for you so much and I’ve missed you.’

  Cat grew increasingly uncomfortable in the face of Bella’s emotional incontinence. It was so far removed from her own family’s behaviour. Of course they acknowledged each other’s emotional states, but they would never have dreamed of spilling them out so publicly. She was about to point out that the main reason they had seen so little of each other was that the Thorpes had been monopolising her own brother when Bella took out a tissue and began dabbing at her eyes.

  It was all too much for James, who burst out in indignation, ‘Now look what you’ve done, Cat. Bella’s crying, and all because you won’t come for a day out with us. It was supposed to be a treat, now you’ve spoiled everything. I think hanging out with the Allens has ruined you.’

  Cat scrambled to her feet, astonished. Her brother had never taken another’s side over her, and it was a shock to realise how things had shifted between them. ‘I’m exactly the same person I always was. The one who keeps her word.’

  Bella put a hand to her chest and sighed. ‘That’s that, then. If Cat’s not going, neither am I. I don’t want to be the only girl among you men.’

  ‘So take Claire or Jess,’ Cat said, tired of attempting to be conciliatory.

  ‘Oh, brilliant,’ John exploded. ‘Do you really think I came to Edinburgh to take my sisters out and look like a complete and utter twat? No thank you. If you’re not going, neither am I. Your company’s the only reason I wanted to go in the first place.’

  ‘Like I care,’ Cat muttered under her breath.

  ‘I can’t believe how obstinate you’re being,’ James said. ‘And here I’ve been telling Bella how kind and sweet-natured you always are to me and our sisters.’

  ‘It’s nothing to do with being kind. It’s to do with dealing fairly with people.’ In her outrage, Cat failed to notice John sidling away in the direction of the bookshop. ‘It’s not always easy, but I do try to do the right thing.’

  Bella sulked. ‘It’s not much of a struggle when what you decide is right happens to coincide with what you want to do.’

  Cat’s heart swelled at the unfairness of it, and they continued to argue the stalemate back and forth until the moment when John burst between them, rubbing his hands. ‘That’s it settled, then. We’re off to Glasgow tomorrow with a clear conscience. I’ve been and made your excuses to Ellie.’

  ‘You’ve done what?’

  ‘I told her you’d sent me to say that you’d just remembered you’d already agreed to come out with us to Linlithgow tomorrow so you’d have to postpone your walk till the day after. And she had to admit that would suit her just as well. So we’re sorted.’

  Bella’s misery dissolved instantly and James looked relieved. ‘You are so smart, Johnny. And now, girlfriend, everything’s turned out perfectly. You’re off the hook and we are going to have a great day out.’

  ‘No, that’s not how it’s going to be,’ Cat said. ‘How dare you, Johnny? Who died and made you my social secretary? You’ve got no right to lie to my friend like that. I’m going after Ellie right now.’

  But Bella grabbed her arm. ‘Don’t be silly, Cat.’

  And Jamie angrily blocked her way. ‘Why are you being so difficult? Johnny just sorted everything out, you could be a bit grateful.’

  ‘Grateful? When he’s made me look like a complete – a complete – a complete shit?’

  James stepped back in surprise. He’d never heard Cat swear in public before. A rebel and a tomboy she might be on the surface, but she had too much love and respect for their father to shame him with bad language where others might hear and judge. ‘Nobody will think that,’ he said uncertainly.

  ‘They will too. I’m going to find Ellie and tell her the truth.’

  ‘No point. She’s gone home,’ John said firmly.

  ‘Then I will go after her. Wherever she’s gone, I will go after her. There’s no point in talking to you people. What kind of man are you? You think if I can’t be persuaded into something, it’s OK to trick me into it?’ And with those words she pulled her arm from Bella’s grasp and pushed past the others. John tried to go after her, but James grabbed him.

  ‘Let her go. There’s no talking to her when she’s like this,’ he said.

  ‘She’s as obstinate as—’ But John could find no comparison that was fit for the consumption of the Book Festival crowd, who were already gawping at him.

  Cat meanwhile was pushing through the press of bodies milling around in the sunshine. When she made it through to the street, there was no sign of Ellie. She ran to the corner and paused for a moment, torn between going straight down the hill and turning left or cutting along the bottom of the square and into Glenfinlas Street. She had no idea which her friend preferred, but
she guessed at the latter because it was a quieter, more leafy route. She took to her heels in spite of the heat, convinced she would catch Ellie before she reached home.

  But Ellie must have been walking briskly, for there was no sign of her until Cat skidded round the corner into Ainslie Place, when she caught sight of her quarry entering the front door. Putting on a turn of speed she didn’t know she possessed, Cat sprinted down the street, taking the front steps at a leap and before she could pause to consider, diving past Calman as he began to close the door.

  ‘Sorry,’ she gasped, making for the open door on the left that she guessed would take her into the drawing room. Ellie whirled round and stared at her in consternation, while her father and her brother looked up in wide-eyed surprise from the game of chess they were playing by the window. Short of breath and even more short of nerve, Cat made a nervous grimace that only someone who loved her could have called a smile. ‘I hurried to catch you up – To explain the stupidity, the mistake – I never promised Johnny Thorpe any such thing – As soon as he brought it up, I said no, I was committed to you – I’m sorry, I didn’t give Calman a chance—’

  ‘Hello, Cat,’ Henry said, getting to his feet. ‘How lovely to see you.’

  ‘Henry, hello. I tried to catch Ellie up because that high-handed idiot Johnny Thorpe took it into his head to tell her a pack of lies. He did, didn’t he, Ellie?’

  Ellie seemed uncertain how to respond. ‘He said you’d made a mistake about tomorrow. That you’d promised to go on some trip with him and Jamie and Bella tomorrow so you wouldn’t be able to come up Arthur’s Seat with Henry and me.’

  Cat made an impatient gesture with her hands. ‘I knew it. Honestly, Ellie, that is a complete fantasy. A lie. I made no such plans. He just wants me to come on this stupid outing so he can show off his fancy car again. I am determined to go walking with you and Henry tomorrow, not go to Glasgow or Linlithgow with that idiot.’