Soul of Flame (Imdalind Series #4)

by Rebecca Ethington

  His hands stopped moving as he pressed my hands together before he cupped his hands in my lap, his motions making it clear what I was supposed to do.

  I reached toward the box, my hands shaking as I grabbed the small vial, pouring what was left into Ilyan's hands, my nerves so strong that I was sure I wouldn't be able to rub the oil into his hands as well.

  “My property has hence expanded this day of days, my heart increasing in ground and way. The lands I walk shall forever be bound to my mate in front of me,” I repeated the words as he had guided me. My tongue stumbled over words I hadn’t said since I first learned to talk.

  Ilyan never laughed; he never smiled in jest. He only watched as I moved the oil into his skin, his heartbeat steadying mine as I pushed my magic into him, filling him as he had me.

  Ilyan wrapped his arms around me as I dropped his hands, his arms strong as he moved me to face him until I could see the streaks of tears on his face, the golden light in his eyes stronger than I had ever seen before.

  “Budu tě opatrovat až do dne zemřete,” he whispered—the meaning hidden from me—before he pressed his lips to mine, the pressure soft, hesitant.

  I could taste the sweetness of him on my lips, smell the scent of his magic in my hair. I pressed into him, needing him.

  His arms wrapped around me as I called for him, his touch strong as his magic flooded me at the same time as mine flooded him. It was a sensation of electricity and fire as everything melded together; as his hands pressed me to him, as his lips pressed into me, as his tears fell onto my nose.

  “Ilyan,” I gasped as his magic pressed further, the pressure consuming me. The heat grew to be more than when he had placed the Štít, more than when he had protected me.

  It grew until that was all I felt and my own scream filled my ears before everything went black.

  Twenty

  I had never been on a beach before; I had never felt the warm sand beneath my fingers, the sun against my body.

  I definitely felt the sand now and ran my fingers through it, the gritty texture new and yet somehow familiar. My fingers dug into the tiny granules until I reached a colder underside that I hadn’t expected. The chill from the sand was a nice opposite to the sun that beat against my face.

  I sunk into it, letting the dream take me away, wanting to linger in the peace of it if only for a little longer. The sand enveloped me as I breathed in the salty air until the call of a gull echoed in my ears and I jumped to sitting, my eyes flying open to the burn of the sun in confusion.

  My eyes snapped shut again in an attempt to stifle the pain, the gulls continuing to call around me, heightening my confusion. My dreams never had sound, and if they did, it was distorted and frightening. This sound, though, was clear, crisp—perfect.

  I opened my eyes again, careful to control the burn, only to have them widen at the long stretch of white sand and the endless length of blue water that filled the world in front of me.

  It was a world I had never seen before.

  It wasn’t a dream; everything was too perfect to be a dream.

  It didn’t make any sense. Nothing about this made any sense. I had just been sitting in my room with Ilyan, his fingers soft as he braided my hair. I could still smell the oil on my hands, hear his voice as he spoke to me in Czech, feel the pressure of his magic as it fused with mine.

  Ilyan’s magic.

  The Zȇlství.

  The bond must be complete.

  The sun seemed to warm at the thought, my body heating as my magic bubbled along with the sun. It was silly that I hadn’t thought of it sooner—that I hadn’t put it all together—but now I knew.

  This was a Tȍuha.

  Our Tȍuha.

  I had never seen anything so beautiful as the place I stood in at that moment; I had never known something like this was possible within the Tȍuha. This was not the white-walled spaces and tormented hell I had experienced before. This was paradise.

  The beach was lined by endless stretches of water that lapped and kissed the length of the white sand I sat on. My toes dug into the sand as I turned, the beauty of the beach increasing as the waves crashed and exploded against the brown rocks off in the distance. White foam from the breaking waves sprayed into the air and toward the large manor house that was nestled into the trees just behind.

  I stared at the house, my heart relaxing at the beauty and perfection of this place I found myself in. It wasn’t complete, though, because I was alone.

  My heart called desperately for my other half, fear building that I hadn’t seen him yet.

  He had to be here somewhere.

  “Ilyan?” I called toward the house, knowing my voice wasn’t strong enough to carry over the sound of the waves and the gulls.

  I watched the house as another wave broke over the rocks, almost expecting him to walk out the front door toward me. I knew he was over there; I could feel it. I could feel his magic, living inside of me, swell and pull me in that direction.

  I had felt the sensation before with Ryland, but then, it had been cast in fear and had been unwanted. This time, as the warmth moved through me, my magic responded joyfully. It pulled at me as my bare feet slipped through the slick sand, making it hard to keep my balance. I had never walked in sand before, and now I was wondering how all those old people in denture cream commercials did it. My leg muscles were on fire as I pushed myself forward, my need for him growing with each step.

  Why Ilyan had brought me to the south of France, of all places, I had no idea.

  I stopped in place as the idea hit me, the battering ram of a thought strong and unexplainable.

  The south of France.

  I didn't know where the thought had come from, or why I would even think that this unfamiliar beach would be there. The only time I had ever spoken to anyone about France was in that tiny room in that farmhouse when Ilyan had told me about his house.

  His house.

  The frantic beating of my heart increased as I looked up to the large manor. It was a little more than the 'little house' that Ilyan had spoken of at the time, but right then, I didn't care.

  I sped into a run in an attempt to reach the house, my feet slipping and arms flailing as I tried to keep my balance, tried to find any sort of speed. The sand gave me neither.

  “Ilyan!” I yelled as my feet slipped out from under me, my knees crashing to the sand as I lost my balance.

  I stared toward the house as I tried to catch my breath, my chest rising and falling as the salty air moved into me, the humidity bringing me little relief. I didn't even know why I was breathing so hard; my body didn't really feel like I needed it.

  I pushed myself to standing, ready to make a new attempt at a run when my magic pulled at me with a warm tug that took my breath away. I gasped at the sensation, my eyes narrowing toward the pull just as Ilyan made his way down the stone steps of the house. The wide smile on his face was an electric shock through my system.

  “Ilyan,” I gasped as I took off, my feet moving before my body received the message. Arms flailed as feet moved, the uncoordinated movement sending me crashing down hard enough that I was sure I had looked like a wet fish that time.

  “Careful, my love,” Ilyan laughed as he crouched beside me. “It is not easy to run in sand.”

  “So I’ve noticed,” I grumbled as I rolled onto my back. I didn’t think I had the strength to get up again, not like I wanted to. Ilyan was here now. I had nowhere else I wanted to be.

  Ilyan had perched himself next to me, his face soft and welcoming as he smiled at me, the warmth in his eyes turning me to the equivalent of warm jelly—warm jelly that was melting under the heat of the French sun.

  The thought was as ridiculous as it was perfect; as perfect as everything was right in that one joyful moment. It was a feeling I hadn’t felt in months, a peace I had been seeking since the day I had run from Ryland’s house. Somehow, I had finally found it. I wasn’t sure what to do with such joy as a smile didn’t seem like
it was enough, so I began to laugh, the sound fresh and elated as it echoed through the air, the gulls chatting along as if my happiness was contagious.

  “I don’t think I have ever seenyou this free, Můj Navždy,” Ilyan whispered as he sat down beside me, his arm propping up his weight as he leaned over me.

  His side pressed against mine as his arm enclosed me under him. The warmth that radiated off him seeped into me, my body pulling at it as if I couldn’t get enough, as if I wouldn’t be able to live without it.

  The sun framed him from behind as he leaned toward me, his hair glowing in that weird, ethereal light that should be reserved for bad romance movies, yet somehow, right here it fit him.

  “Můj navždy?” I asked, the awe leaving my face as confusion took its place.

  “It means ‘my forever,’ Joclyn.”

  “My forever. Můj navždy,” I repeated the words as accurately as I could, getting used to them on my lips, in my heart.

  I smiled as my stomach fluttered, the gold flecks in Ilyan’s eyes shining brightly.

  “Yes,” Ilyan whispered, his hand moving from the sand to my face, the usual, soft touch tingling over my skin. I closed my eyes as my body heated and cooled with the pleasure of his touch. The sensation was stronger than anything I had ever felt before, making it hard to control my breathing. I gasped as the feeling swelled, at the way my toes tensed and my magic popped in sparks of heat inside my body.

  Ilyan’s fingers ran the length of my jawbone before the touch left, the supercharged sensations trailing away as his fingers did. My eyes snapped open as his hand withdrew, shock still running through me only to see him gazing down at me, a knowing smile on his face.

  “What was that?” I gasped, the words barely able to find their way out of the pressure in my chest.

  “The sensation that a Zȇlství gives you, mi lasko. A true Zȇlství. One forged in honesty and commitment. It is your body reacting to mine, your soul to mine, your heart to mine. I never thought it would be this strong. I never thought…” His voice broke as he looked away, the movement of his head casting his features in shadows.

  Even though I couldn’t see the lines of his face, I knew what had come over him. I could feel it within me as his heart swelled, the thankfulness he felt for the gift we had been given. It was as strong as the waves of the ocean that crashed over the rocks.

  I lifted my hand from where it lay until my fingers touched the side of his jaw. I could feel the stubble on his chin—the warmth of his skin—but it was the way our magic reacted—the way the sensation rocked through me—that affected me the most, that sent Ilyan’s breathing to shallow pants of desire.

  I didn’t stop, even though it was hard to focus, even though my hand shook. I ran my fingers over the smooth lines of his face, across his hair line, and down his neck until my shaking hand fell into the sand, taking the supercharged sensations with it.

  “Is it all you hoped for?” I asked, my voice shaking with nerves as I asked him.

  I didn’t know why I was so nervous. I wasn’t even sure why I had asked in the first place. I could feel his contentment, hear his soul rejoice as he found pleasure in what he had been waiting for his entire life. Maybe it was my own insecurities, my own worries that had brought the words out.

  Ilyan turned toward me as he lowered his body to the sand, his tall frame parallel to mine as we lay side by side. I was barely able to turn toward him before his hand wrapped around my waist, dragging me through the sand until I was an inch away from him.

  I could feel his breath against my face, the warmth of his hand against my back, and I didn’t want to move away. I lay still beside him, the words in his mind projecting through the light in his eyes before the love shown through, and he finally put voice to his feelings.

  “All and more, mi lasko,” he whispered, his voice so soft and tender that any nerves I had faded into oblivion. “I am here with the woman I love, the woman I would die for, in a place I have created for us. My heart could not be more content.”

  Ilyan’s hand left my back, his touch like a feather as it moved up my spine and over to the skin of my arms. I gasped as his skin came into contact with mine, a wide smile spreading over his face at the reaction. I knew I shouldn’t have been embarrassed by the way he looked at me, but I couldn’t help the way my stomach tightened. I looked away in a foolish attempt to fight the blush.

  “So that is your house, then?” I asked, inclining my head toward the giant manor nestled into the rocks behind him.

  Ilyan didn’t even turn toward it, he just smiled, his fingers continuing to trail up and down my arms

  “Mmmhmmm,” he sighed as I looked back toward him, his eyes capturing mine. “I told you about it, remember?”

  “So it is real, then?”

  “Yes, it stands just outside a city by the name of Giens. I built it for you, for us, about a hundred years after I first received the sight.”

  “No wonder it’s a little run down,” I said as I reached forward and poked him playfully, only to keep my hand against him, resting lightly on his side.

  “It is yours now, my love,” he whispered as his fingers moved off my arm, the soft touch moving up my neck and over my face. I closed my eyes at the calming pressure, my focus on the feel of his fingers against my skin as well as the way his free hand moved to wrap around mine, his magic settling in joy.

  “Thank you, Ilyan,” I said, my mind so relaxed I wasn’t even sure if I had spoken the words aloud.

  “Anything, my love.”

  Ilyan caressed my arm, my jaw, the bridge of my nose as we lay in the sand, the waves crashing by our feet—the water splashing over our toes as the tide came closer—but I didn’t move. I didn’t want to. He looked into me so passionately that I was sure I was going to get lost in his eyes—lost in the way he held me, lost in the feel of his touch. I didn’t care; I wanted to be lost.

  Ilyan smiled as he began to sing to me, our song gentle and calming as it rose and fell with the rhythm of the waves. He shared the words he had written for me all those years ago. Words I was beginning to finally understand.

  Hush now, child. Be still, be calm. The world will change at the new dawn. And when it does, you will see, just how you and I were meant to be.

  He sang over and over, my lips moving along until I began to sing as well, my voice shaky as my breath washed over his chest.

  We sang together until the ocean left and the rumble of low thunderheads crashed through our room in the abbey, jerking me awake as Ilyan’s arm tightened around me, pulling me into his bare chest.

  His tension swelled into me, the fear rumbling through me with the same power that the thunder surrounding us did.

  It was time.

  I intertwined my fingers with his as I leaned back into him, his hold on me increasing until I could feel his heart beat against my back, his magic that would now forever live inside of me bubbling around to protect me, to calm me.

  It was weird to feel so connected to him; the power of the Zȇlství so strong that it shocked me. Before, with only our souls fused together, I had felt some of his emotions, I had heard some of his thoughts. It was nothing compared to what I was experiencing right then.

  In that moment, I felt things I had never felt before, heard things that I knew were just for me, and even some things that I knew were not. I felt my magic within Ilyan, the same way I was sure he felt his within me. The presence was so pleasant I never wanted to lose it.

  I spun in Ilyan’s arms until I faced him, my face burrowing into his chest as he held me. His lips pressed softly onto the top of my head.

  I’m scared, I sent into his mind, my voice quaking as my body did.

  His arms tightened around me as the warmth of his magic spread, the hot water warmth soothing my nerves.

  Do not be afraid, my love. Know that I will be here.

  My eyes widened at the clarity of the thought that moved into me, Ilyan’s voice echoing inside of my head clear enough that I
wasn’t sure if I had just missed his lips move.

  I had heard him.

  His forehead knit together as he looked at me, obviously concerned about my response. He either didn’t know, or being able to hear him after a Zȇlství was so normal I should have expected it. Except it wasn’t normal. They had told me as much when I spoke into Ilyan’s mind for the first time, and now he was speaking into mine.

  “Do not be afraid, my love,” I repeated his words out loud, my voice soft as his eyes widened in shock.

  “You heard me?”

  I did.

  You can hear me? he asked, the smile on his face spreading as his eyes lit up.

  I nodded once and his smile grew, his arms wrapping around me as he pressed me into him, the warmth of our body heat trapped in the heavy blanket we lay under.

  You can hear me.

  I felt his rapture at this new development, his joy at being able to be so close to me, even if it was only for a precious few moments. His joy filled me and I smiled, letting his warmth run over me as the thunder rumbled, the lightning brightening our room. I let his joy build in me, my body snuggling into his until a loud knock sounded against the door, causing our arms to tighten around each other.

  “It’s time, My Lord,” Sain said as his voice drifted toward us, the sound loud and unwanted in my ears.

  “Thank you, Sain,” Ilyan called back as he dismissed him.

  The warmth of the bed suddenly felt cold and brittle against me.

  The air seemed heavy as we lay there, looking between us without seeing, the reality of what we were about to walk into so unwanted that neither of us dared to put voice to it. Ilyan said nothing before his lips pressed against my forehead, the pressure warm and needed before he was gone.

  I followed his lead, my legs swinging over the side of the bed as a flash of white filled the room, bringing in the light of day before it was gone and thunder took its place.