Forsaken

by Dean Murray

  James dropped to the ground as Richard stepped back and looked at me. Every single part of me wanted to rush into the fight, but instead I fixed James with my best poker face.

  "Get back in there and actually do some damage or Dominic is going to pay for your failure once I finally let her come back home."

  It was like I'd flipped a switch. A wave of power roared out of James, and for the briefest of seconds I almost thought he was going to turn and charge me, but instead he rushed Richard with all of the subtlety of a battering ram. They went down in a blur of limbs and for a moment James had the better position, but then Richard's gift kicked in again and suddenly James was taking four hits for every three he managed to inflict on Richard.

  My beast was prowling at the edge of my control, unhappy that I was letting this slow demolition derby proceed. The tide was turning inexorably against James and then suddenly he lost control of Richard's left hand and it flashed forward and tore into the other side of James' chest.

  I transformed between steps as I charged into the ring, yelling for Isaac to get James out and into Donovan's care. My first strike was blocked by the oddly yielding surface of Richard's shield, but my second got through and connected with his left arm.

  James had worked him over enough that he was slowing down, but I wasn't at my best either. I had an edge in speed, and probably endurance too, but in a protracted fight his ability to deflect a significant percentage of my blows would go a long ways towards balancing things out.

  I hit him again with a combination of blows, consciously choosing not to get my feet involved yet, and again was stopped, but this time it felt like the barrier gave more than before. Under other circumstances I would have assumed he was reaching his limits of being able to use his power and attacked with more force to try and break through, but given Kristin's dream, I had to assume the give to his barrier was just a ploy. It was the best explanation for what Kristin had seen in the first timeline.

  I continued to use fast, mobile attacks to try and slip something around his defenses. It was a valid strategy, but mostly I just wanted to keep him moving. A minute later I was bleeding from more than a dozen minor wounds and a couple that would be serious if the fight went on for much longer. I was starting to worry that I'd somehow changed Kristin's version of the future to something worse, and then suddenly I saw the opening I needed.

  Richard ducked backwards, but he left his right foot a little too far ahead of him in the process. I seized the opportunity, lunging forward and sinking one set of talons into his foot as I pushed.

  He twisted as he fell, ensuring that he'd be able to get right back up, but that exposed his back to me and I latched on with everything I had. He was strong. Not as strong as the werewolf had been, but stronger than I was expecting. He spun around with tremendous speed and I nearly lost my grip on him. I let go with one hand, looking for another hold, but when I tried to sink my claws back into his shoulder, the plane of force was there again, stopping me from getting a new hold.

  Richard twisted away and only the fact that I had a good hold on his legs with my talons enabled me to not lose control of the situation. He still tore free of my feet, but the effort brought him to his knees, and I rode him to the ground, slashing and clawing the entire way down. A few seconds later I got all five of the major arteries running through his neck, but not before he managed to spin around and slice open my stomach from one hip to the opposite set of ribs.

  I rolled away from him, confident he was only seconds away from death and wanting nothing more than to put some space between us until he wasn't dangerous anymore. I took a couple of stumbling steps before I realized that somewhere along the way I'd shifted back into my human form.

  It wasn't a safe thing to have done. Not yet, not while Richard was still a threat. I reached for my beast, trying to force myself back into my hybrid body, but my beast weakly pushed me away.

  Darkness closed in around me as I fell to the ground. Strangely enough, it was Jess who made it to me first.

  "Make sure James knows that I wasn't going to hurt Dom. Tasha knows."

  Chapter 13

  Adriana Paige

  Upper East Side

  Manhattan, New York

  "I'm not mad."

  "Adri, honey, just tell me the truth. I know you're mad. You're hurt and you're disappointed, too. It's okay to just come right out and say so."

  I was in an untenable position. If I said I wasn't mad or even disappointed, then my mom would be hurt and claim I hadn't even wanted to spend Christmas with her. If I blew up and threw a royal hissy fit because she'd just upended our plans at the last possible moment, then she'd claim I was selfish and that I didn't appreciate how hard she worked to put a roof over my head and food on the table.

  Things weren't made any easier by the fact that I didn't really know how I felt about the change in plans. I'd been looking forward to some time with Mom, but I hadn't been very excited about finally meeting Russ. Honestly, I'd pretty much figured something like this would happen, and the more Mom had assured me that it wouldn't, the more I'd been positive that it would.

  She'd gotten the call on Christmas Eve. There was a huge show the day after Christmas in Italy, and the photographer they'd lined up had canceled at the last minute. It was a new show, so they needed the legitimacy of a big-name photographer to help make sure it didn't flop.

  I didn't think that justified loading my mom up on one of the latest Gulfstream jets and flying her over at the drop of a hat, but apparently the show's backers didn't agree with me. Mom hadn't even waited five minutes before she'd called them back and accepted the job. She'd been on the plane less than two hours later.

  Today was Christmas, and I was suffering through a call that was part apology, part self-justification, and mostly just about her trying to stay awake long enough to avoid the worst of the jet lag. She was already starting to bob a little, so I figured I didn't have much longer. Certainly by noon my time, she'd decide to throw in the towel and just go to bed.

  I checked the clock on my iPad and nodded to myself. I'd been on the Skype call for nearly an hour so far and shouldn't have much more than half an hour left.

  "I don't know what to tell you, Mom. I wanted to spend the day together, but I'm not mad. It would have been nice, but you already know that I'm not super keen to meet Russ. How did he take the change in plans?"

  It was a last-minute stroke of brilliance. In hindsight I actually couldn't believe I hadn't thought of it sooner. Mom frowned and shrugged.

  "He wasn't very happy last night when I called him, but he said he would find another way to spend the evening. I think maybe I went a step too far this time with him. Honestly, I didn't even think of him when I took the job. He's such a great catch. I hope I haven't chased him off."

  "Maybe you should give him a call and apologize again."

  "You're right, honey. I don't know where my mind is lately. I guess I'm more tired than I realized. I'll talk to you later...not tomorrow or the next day. I have to work the show. I guess I'll see you when I'm back there in New York."

  "Okay, Mom. That sounds good. I'll see you then."

  I hung up the call and then stood and stretched. Christmas by yourself was pretty depressing. The only thing I could think of that might be worse was maybe New Year's Eve by yourself. The odds were pretty good that I'd get to experience both this year, so I guessed that meant I'd be able to settle that question once and for all.

  Dom had flown back to Utah early in the day yesterday. Apparently James had been in some kind of big dustup. Rachel had been the one to call and tell her that things weren't looking very good for James. Dom had made me promise not to wander the city by myself and then she'd left for the airport.

  Ben still hadn't called Dom's guy in Wyoming. I'd gone to sleep each night half-worried that some vampire mafia type guys were going to come find me, and now I was spending the next few days all by myself.

  I considered texting Albert, but that wo
uld have just been cruel. I couldn't do that to him. I considered my options for a few minutes and then bundled up, grabbed my tablet, and headed downstairs. Dom's place was bigger and emptier than my place, but it had the benefit of not being a place where my mom was supposed to be. I was going to order an entire pizza just for myself and see if Dom had stocked the fridge with any ice cream. She had a sweet tooth so there was a pretty good chance there'd be something in the house that would make me feel better.

  The journey over to Dom's building was thankfully uneventful. I wished the doorman and the desk clerk both a merry Christmas, and a couple of minutes later, I was curled up in a blanket on one of the huge leather couches in the living room dialing a pizza place.

  It took me a while to find something to watch on the gigantic TV, but I finally narrowed it down to two options. One option was a movie that was ironically about werewolves and vampires. The other was a romantic comedy that included a bunch of actors I'd never heard of. My own life had plenty of potential for sudden violence, so as I ran back downstairs to get the pizza, I decided on the romantic comedy.

  I made it through almost the entire three-hour movie before I broke down and started crying. I might have even made it all day if the movie hadn't included a heart-wrenching subplot. By the time the movie ended, I couldn't even see the screen. I just closed my eyes and let the tears wash over me. At some point the crying ran its course and I dropped off to sleep.

  Interlude

  It had been so long since I'd visited this particular dreamscape that for a second I almost couldn't believe I was back. It simultaneously made up for the crappiness of my day so far and made it worse.

  I couldn't remember whether I'd had one of these vivid, perfect dreams without Alec being present, but it was kind of irrelevant either way. When I thought of landscapes where trees were softly glowing tendrils reaching up to the sky, I thought of Alec.

  The ten thousand scents the air was carrying past me just made me remember how divine he'd smelled here. I did a slow turn, taking in my surroundings, and saw him almost immediately behind me. He was kneeling down, a few steps away from a large, flat rock that had some kind of rosebush planted on the other side of it.

  He looked up as I walked hesitantly towards him, and it took me a couple of seconds to realize that he'd been crying. My vision suddenly switched and the soft, golden light coming from the living things around us dimmed slightly so that I could see Alec's features better.

  "It's been a long time since I shared a dream with you, Adri."

  "I know. I'd almost forgotten what it was like, just how much beauty you see on a daily basis. Is this a real dream? Are we really both here, or are you just a dream?"

  He shrugged. "I don't know. I thought about asking you the same thing, but ultimately it doesn't matter. We're probably not going to get a chance to compare notes in real life later on."

  It was like being doused in ice water. I'd entered the dream unhappy because I'd known it was going to bring back memories of Alec, but once I'd seen him that had all vanished. For a second there everything had felt almost exactly like it had before I'd left. It was like a part of me had been missing, and for a brief few moments that part had been reunited with the rest of me.

  His words reminded me once again of just what I'd walked away from. It hurt more than I'd expected. Maybe time had done more to dull the pain than I'd realized.

  "No, I guess you're right; we probably aren't going to see each other again. I may not even remember this when I wake up."

  Alec took a deep breath and nodded. "There is that. Is it sad that I'm hoping that's the case? It just seems easier that way. I've even started sleeping at odd times to try and make sure we wouldn't overlap and have a chance to share dreams again."

  "No, I understand. I guess I feel the same way."

  I looked back at him and saw that the tears had disappeared, but there was still evidence that they'd been there. It hadn't just been my imagination. I walked to almost within arm's reach of him and knelt down beside him.

  "Where are we?"

  Alec gestured with his hand, taking in the low rise we were kneeling on. "This is the pack's cemetery. All of the people who just disappear as far as the normal world is concerned are buried out here. Brandon, Vincent, Alison, Jack, they are all buried over there. This is where my dad is buried. We couldn't risk a real headstone, so Donovan put that rock there. We planted the rosebush a little while after you left."

  I looked back at the rose bush and realized it wasn't just any regular flower, it was Lagrimas. It was fitting. It was one of the few things that connected Alec and the father he'd never really known. A shared passion that had finally come to fruition nearly two decades after his father's death.

  "It's beautiful. I'm sorry; I wish I could have been there to help you plant it."

  Alec shrugged, but I knew him too well for the motion to fully conceal the pain he was feeling.

  "I'd planned on having you come out here with Donovan, Rachel and me. After you left there didn't seem to be much point in making a big production out of it. I slipped out here and planted it myself one evening."

  He looked around again, seemingly searching for something. After a couple of seconds he nodded, stood, and walked over to a low mound of dirt.

  "I was wondering whether or not this would be here. I added another grave yest...actually I don't know when it was that I killed him. What is today?"

  "It's Christmas, Alec."

  "It was a couple of days ago then. We had another challenger show up. He almost killed James. I guess maybe that is why I came here. I was checking to see whether or not they'd buried James, too. Hopefully this means he survived."

  "It sounds like things are getting bad. Dom doesn't say much; she knows how much it hurts me to think about you, but I can tell that the pack is struggling."

  Alec's laugh had more bitterness to it than I remembered. He smiled, but it didn't reach his eyes. "I've told each and every member of the pack that I'll kill them if they say your name out loud where I can hear it. I should hear absolutely nothing about what's going on with your life, but they've just come up with a bunch of circumlocutions to get around the rule. It was working okay right up until I sent Isaac out to play bodyguard. With all of the craziness you've been experiencing lately, there wasn't any way to avoid learning at least a little bit about what's happening in your life."

  There was a crude stone bench facing the cemetery. Alec walked over, sat down and then patted the stone next to him.

  "It was harder than I expected to hear that you'd started dating. I wanted to hunt Albert down and kill him, but I was also glad in a way that it was him. Albert is a good guy. I really hope things work out between the two of you."

  I nodded. "You're right; Albert is a good guy, but nothing can happen between us. What about you? I hear some new girl in town has caught your eye."

  Alec shook his head. "It's more like a political alliance. Tasha and her mom have a solution that would save the pack. It's perfect in almost every way, but I can't bring myself to throw my lot in with them."

  "How come?"

  This was like it had been before I'd left. I missed being able to talk to him. He'd spent so much time worried that I was becoming addicted to his touch, and it had turned out that it was talking I missed the most.

  "I...well, I guess there are two reasons. Tasha is more practical than I am. You could say she's what you were worried I'd become. It's possible I might be able to get around that. I've already set my foot on a path that will make me like her eventually. Even so, I always thought that when I married it would be for love, not for political expediency."

  There were things there that he wasn't telling me, but I didn't have the right to pry anymore. We sat in silence for several seconds before Alec chuckled again. It still didn't have any joy in it.

  "We have a new girl in the pack. She can see the future, or at least a version of it. Sometimes I think that you could see the future too. That's why
you left me; you saw what I'd become, and you knew it wasn't worth staying around for."

  I opened my mouth to protest, but he stood and pointed to his father's grave. "I've spent my entire life trying to figure out where he went wrong. It seemed so easy. He could have just let Agony kill Donovan. Maybe a few other people would have been sacrificed before it was all said and done, but he could have kept his pack together, he could have preserved the greatest number and lived to challenge the Coun'hij later on."

  He looked up at me with a kind of naked need for me to understand that made me reach out to him.

  "I couldn't sit by and let the same thing happen to Jasmin and Isaac and the rest. It wasn't about me; it was never about me. I wanted to save the people who were most important to me."

  I took his hand and nodded. "I can understand why you did what you did. I've thought back to what I said a dozen times. I...I know I can't go back, that those things can't be unsaid, but I'm not convinced anymore that I was right."

  Alec shook his head and the look of sadness on his face tore at my heart. "No, Adri. You were right, you and my father both. The pack is falling apart, and all that I'm sure of anymore is that it would have been better if I'd died rather than being forced to watch the pack slowly disintegrate around me."

  Chapter 14

  Adriana Paige

  Upper East Side

  Manhattan, New York

  Dom had been acting oddly ever since she'd returned from Utah. At first, I'd been worried that Alec had punished her, but that turned out not to be the case.

  When you got right down to it, I didn't have much room to be pointing fingers though. I'd been acting a little strange myself ever since I'd woken up from my Christmas nap with a roaring headache and the sense that I'd dreamed about something important, but I had no recollection of what it might have been.