One Direction: Who We Are: Our Official Autobiography

by One Direction

  ‘What Makes You Beautiful’ getting into the Top 30 in the States was also amazing. Hearing that our début album had been brought forward a week because of the intense interest in us was pretty cool too. But having thousands of fans turn up to cheer us on in the street before we went on the Today show was just on another level. That programme had been built up to be the biggest thing, but to be perfectly honest we didn’t really know much about it ’cos we’re not American. We later found out some of the fans had been queueing overnight in the freezing-cold New York streets. How can you ever thank people for that?

  Seeing so many people in the streets of New York was just the most surreal experience – it’s hard to describe. One of my earliest memories as a kid is going there on holiday to see my aunt, so New York has a special place in my life. Then hearing about the sheer numbers at the Today show, 10,000 fans, all those people who went to so much trouble to come and see us, we were so pleased. After that, any thoughts of the band struggling to get a profile in the States went out of the window. The rest of the year was nuts: the tour over there, more TV, radio, promo – everywhere we went the fans just went crazy.

  Oddly enough, if I’m being totally honest with you, going to perform on a TV show is when I get the most nervous. In fact, I get so tense I’m often close to puking. I’m not lying – I can get physically sick. Even now, after all the experience I’ve had with TV, it just kills me. We started off on a TV show so I should be most at home there, but every time we do telly it riddles me with nerves. With TV, I’m petrified from the minute I get ready in the dressing room to the second we walk out onto the set. I don’t know why that is and, to be honest with you, it’s getting worse, not better. I think I get in such a nervous state that it just spirals into this one massive bag of nerves. Then when the next TV show is coming along, the apprehension hits immediately and it all starts again, only even worse. Maybe it’s because it feels quite intimate? I don’t like singing in front of small crowds. If you ask me to sing at a party in front of friends – not a chance! – but put me on a stage in front of 50,000 people and I’ll sing my heart out, relaxed as you like. I understand this doesn’t really make sense, but I’m just telling it as it is.

  Even in 2013, when we were invited to perform at the American Music Awards, I was in such a state about singing a song I was usually totally comfortable with. To be fair, it was made worse by the nature of the artists on the show. Just before we went out to perform, Justin Timberlake was coming off after collecting an award and I remember looking at him and saying to the lads, ‘Is that the calibre of people that are here tonight?’ I scanned the crowd from the side of stage and I could see Lady Gaga sitting in the front row, Justin was over there and Katy Perry was a few rows away from him. It was ridiculous! That was just in the theatre, never mind the tens of millions of people watching at home! I was like, ‘Crap!’

  To make matters worse, as he walked off Justin Timberlake came over to say hello and I was absolutely bricking it by then, nearly swallowing my own puke. I just said, ‘I think I’m gonna puke, lads.’ I was fine in the end, I did the song OK, but it’s pretty draining being that nervous.

  I’ll never forget the moment when I found out Up All Night had hit Number 1 in the States. We were in New York doing some promo and had hammered every radio station, every TV show, every meet-and-greet, everything we could possibly throw ourselves at. I was actually in the back of a taxi with my friend going to the Sony offices to collect basketball tickets for a Knicks game when I got a phonecall off Will, our manager. He said, ‘I’ve got some news for you, Niall,’ in this really droll tone. Then he said, ‘Well, it could’ve been better ...’ and I was like, ‘Ah, crap!’ but then he said, ‘You’re Number 1!’ Me and my friend were absolutely boxing the face off each other in the back of this taxi, so much so that the driver kicked us out because he didn’t know what the hell was going on.

  Once we were at Number 1 in the States we soon realised what we thought was mental was just small on the future scale of all things One Direction. The more busy we are the better it suits me, honest to God. I’ve the attention span of a goldfish, honestly, and I’m the most fidgety person in the world. I’ve probably played with my phone about ten times in the last ten seconds writing this, without me even knowing. So I enjoy my life being manic, and rushing about all over the place.

  The big tour to promote that first album was something else. Some of the venues in the States were modest theatres but one night we turned up and it was a shed with seats for 8,000 and a big lawn area at the back. We asked, ‘What’s that lawn area for?’ and they said, ‘We always sell tickets for that area on the day ... so you can expect another 25,000 people to turn up for the show.’

  Around that time we also met Michelle Obama, and I have to say she was unbelievable. Her daughters were lovely too, chatting away and occasionally saying, ‘My dad said this ...’ or ‘My dad did that ...’ like any kids would, but because they’re such normal kids you almost have to remind yourself that they’re talking about the President. They’re the most humble people ever and were made to be the President’s daughters. They can chat with anyone and have obviously been brought up really well. You only have to meet their mum to see that – Michelle is amazing, a lovely woman. We’ve never met the President but he’s been in contact saying thank you for sorting his girls out with tickets and all that. I’m a huge Obama fan – I even have a statue of him in my back garden!

  That début album tour went on for ages ’cos we just kept getting dates added and added. Yes, it was tiring and at one point or another all of us were exhausted. We eventually did over 60 dates, so that was inevitable. But what a buzz! Crazy. On tour you just have to remind yourself that you’re all in the same boat. We would say to ourselves, ‘I can’t go home but neither can that sound engineer over there; our tour manager can’t get home either, all our security, management, crew ...’ That’s just the way we always looked at it – we’re all in it together. We were so privileged to have the chance to get out there and show that our record sales were not just hype, that we had a live show to back the album up. We’ve always wanted to work as hard as we can at justifying the press and public interest in One Direction.

  While this was all kicking off, we were also writing for our second album. I personally felt the pressure on that record was huge. Before we did the first album there was no pressure really ... well, there was a bit but not as much, because people didn’t know us. I honestly felt like we’d nothing to lose. But with the début album hitting Number 1 all over the place, now we had to better ourselves. There was a change in the atmosphere now that there were some pretty serious expectations. And because we were so busy we had to find time somewhere to record and write – but we were also on the road, so working that much meant it wasn’t always easy to find it. We used to talk about it together, trying to figure out a way to get the album done: ‘How are we gonna find a place to get this new song recorded? Maybe start in that hotel tomorrow? If not, then we aren’t gonna be free for days ...’ That was how it developed.

  There were so many mad events in 2012 I’m not sure which ones to look back on. Obviously the Olympics closing ceremony was a big moment for all of us. That was all a bit crazy, thinking – or trying not to think! – of billions of people watching around the world! The whole experience happened that quick, honestly. I remember walking into the backstage area and saying to the rest of the band, ‘Lads! Madness are in the dressing room next to us!’ They were brilliant. They’re just lads from north London having a right laugh and were great. Ed Sheeran was there and Liam Gallagher was too, having a bit of a laugh with us.

  ‘What Makes You Beautiful’ was edited shorter to fit into one lap of the track so it was over super-fast. All I could see when we were singing was thousands of camera flashes, then before we knew it we were finished and backstage again, looking at each other. I said, ‘Lads, did that just happen?’ It’s only when you watch shows like that back that you realise the
scale of what you’ve just done.

  When an album you’ve made goes to the Number 1 spot in 31 countries, to be honest it’s just completely baffling. It was mad enough when Up All Night did so well internationally, but when the second album, Take Me Home, just blew up all over the world it was quite hard to take in. How can you not get a massive buzz off that? You will never get used to that feeling. I was obviously delighted and I was also pleased ’cos we’d worked so hard and it seemed to be paying off.

  I’ve spoken about our gig at Madison Square Garden before but it’s a really important landmark in the One Direction story. We had a new stage made for that show, we rehearsed hard in England then we went over to the States and did some small arena rehearsal shows before rocking up to MSG on the day. We were still so young and naïve, and in a way – and because we’re not American – it was impossible for us to fully comprehend the significance of that iconic US gig. I freely admit I didn’t take it all in beforehand, but I tell you what, the moment I walked inside the actual venue it hit me like a truck. You just feel it. You get an instant vibe when you walk around that place and can sense the history. The nerves started kicking in then, and I don’t mind admitting that we were bricking it. You see all these photos of Muhammad Ali fights, Sinatra and Elvis concerts, and if you watch our movie you can see us biting our nails – that stomach-churning feeling. We had to make that gig as good as possible. We owed that to ourselves, and to our fans, and also out of respect to the venue and its amazing history. What a night!

  Playing Madison Square Garden was without a doubt one of the best experiences of my life. Going to Ghana with Comic Relief in February 2013 is also right up there. If you can still lose the plot and become a celebrity diva after going out to a place like that then you really are letting yourself down. It was a pretty extreme contrast – playing MSG, where we had thousands of people screaming at us, to flying into Ghana where absolutely no one had a clue who we were.

  As soon as we arrived at the slum we were visiting there was this overpowering stench of poverty – just filth everywhere. It was, in a way, the most disgusting place on Earth, certainly in terms of what I’d ever seen. Yet it was also a really happy place. It was all such a culture shock, both ways really. We felt really bad even going back to the hotel for a shower. The people living there are just incredible and their spirit is mind-boggling. You can only try your best for them when you admire them so much. Our Comic Relief single, ‘One Way Or Another’, hit Number 1 in quite a few countries and raised over £1 million for the charity, so hopefully that money has helped improve their situation.

  By mad contrast, that same month we started a major world tour, this time to promote the second album, Take Me Home, which would eventually stretch to around 130 gigs. I know this might sound a bit odd, but that tour was actually quite relaxed! We were doing arenas by now so quite often we didn’t need to get to the venue till late in the afternoon, which meant we had a chance to chill out, catch up on sleep, relax a little – it was great! For a man who loves his sleep, that can only be good news – I do waste a lot of my life sleeping. ‘Niall, wake up!’ is a phrase I hear a lot on tour.

  That felt like a proper tour to me. We had a little less promo and more time to try to record on the road. So we’d be sticking mattresses against hotel room walls, stuffing pillows everywhere to soundproof a room, just working off a laptop with a couple of speakers, a microphone – real basic stuff, but done properly it can really work. There’s also a vibe on tour that you can sometimes capture in a song – you’re all in this experience on the road together, which can come across in songs that you write and record while you’re travelling.

  Any spare second we had we’d write and write. Since we were on the road so much, I think maybe only one song on our third album was done entirely in the studio. We didn’t record every day on tour, maybe once or twice a week. I would’ve liked to have played more guitar on the record too, but it just wasn’t always possible. Sometimes recording so much on the road can be a killer on your voice, ’cos you’d get up in the morning after the gig the night before, head down to a local studio or more often than not use a makeshift recording set-up back at the hotel, record for maybe four or five hours, then off to the venue for a soundcheck, do the actual show, then back to bed and so on. You also really have to watch your drinking and eating, not going mad eating rubbish or boozing. It was quite a challenge, but we all just wanted to contribute to that album so much.

  One of the maddest gigs for me was when we played an arena one night, and then the next evening my favourite band ever, The Eagles, played there and I got to meet them! I’m a huge fan. As far as melodies go it doesn’t get better than them boys, so I listen to a lot of their stuff. That band gives you so many ideas as to the composition of a song and how it should go. As I said earlier, my dad was a huge fan of The Eagles and I’d seen them twice before I was even ten. When I went to see them in the US that night I was chatting away backstage to them, but I was really star-struck. How could I not be? It was The Eagles, for God’s sake!

  The whole notion of celebrity is a really weird concept to me. I get star-struck by certain people I meet through my job, so on the one hand I have to acknowledge that I admire some stars in that way, but when people tell me that they, or someone they know, are star-struck by me, I frankly find it completely absurd.

  I remember when I first heard The Script. I loved their single ‘The Man Who Can’t Be Moved’ and I used to sing it at various talent shows in Ireland. I assumed they were American, but then I found out they were Irish and it was all over! So fast-forward to 2014 and I’m sitting in a studio with The Script writing songs. It just baffles me. Same with Pearl Jam – I’m a massive fan of that band. We were in Seattle in 2013 and the band’s singer Eddie Vedder brought his kids to the show. His guitarist Mike McCready came up to me and said, ‘Niall, do you mind if I get a picture please?’ It was just so surreal. This was Pearl Jam! Then I walked out on stage and Eddie Vedder was standing right at the front of the arena, watching. I had to play guitar in front of the fella, and I don’t think I’ve ever played better than that night – talk about pressure!

  I obviously really enjoy these perks of my job but as I said, I can’t see how people might feel the same way about me. It just doesn’t add up. When I was recuperating from my knee injury – more of that in a minute! – I was invited to work with the physio team at Chelsea FC and I got along with the players really well – they were all sound, great craic. But a few of them were a little quiet around me and didn’t seem to want to chat much. I was worried I’d maybe said something wrong and I was like, ‘What’s wrong with him? Is everything all right?’ Eventually one of the coaches said, ‘He’s got two kids who are mad One Direction fans and he’s a bit star-struck, Niall.’ I think I swore when I heard that! Come on, really? Honestly, that’s just crazy to think like that.

  When we played Washington, DC, one of the biggest stars that’s ever walked the Earth, Ronnie Wood came into our dressing room, then he came to our movie première. ‘All right, lads, how’s it going? I’m looking forward to seeing this film you’ve made.’ Different league, like. It’s always the most famous ones who seem the nicest, like Jay-Z, and Will Smith’s unbelievable – he remembers everyone and there’s no arrogance about him at all. Johnny Depp invited us round his house for a BBQ. That is someone proper famous.

  I’ll never see myself as a celebrity. That’s someone who wants to be a celebrity, who’s seen everywhere and gets papped every day of the week. You can stay away from paparazzi – I’ve done it for the last four years. You either want to be papped or you don’t. I go and do my job, go home, then mostly sit in my house. I don’t go on many holidays; I prefer to sit in my house, mostly. I might go to the pub, have a few pints and watch the football whenever I can – pretty much do the same thing I’d have done if I was at college back at home. Obviously we’ve earned a great living from the band, so I know I’m very lucky in that sense, but there’s ab
solutely no reason why it should change who you are. I wouldn’t say I was the flashest person in the world. I’ve a car and a nice house, but I’d say I’ve fairly simple tastes after that. Easy to look after. I’m not about to splash the cash and make a fool of myself. Besides, I’d do this job for a tenner, so I would.

  Even if someone was to say I was a celebrity, I’d reply by saying I’m the worst celebrity in the world. A crap celebrity. I don’t have any celebrity friends and I don’t go out partying all the time. My day out is going to Tesco. I could go out every night if I wanted, and because of the perks of this job I could get into nightclubs and have a load of free drinks, but I’d rather pay four quid for a quiet pint up the road watching Sky Sports. People who want to do that whole party/celebrity life, let them do it. Each to their own, but that’s not for me.

  I’ll tell you a story that pretty much sums up our attitude to celebrity. We were at the VMAs and Rihanna was sitting in front of us. ‘Louis!’ I said, ‘Look, there’s Rihanna!’ I was well impressed by that and we ended up chatting to her a bit. Don’t get me wrong, we weren’t suddenly best mates. You don’t see these people every day so you can’t call them your friend, but if you’re at the same awards ‘do’ one night, you end up chatting at some stage. Some awards ceremonies are better than others. The fan-voted awards are the best and we’re so lucky ’cos our fans are ridiculous – the way they vote is nuts. The maddest awards are the ones where you beat the biggest artists in the world in the same category. That’s always a shock.

  Anyway, on this particular night at the VMAs all five of us lads were having a bit of a laugh, and we may have had the odd drink or two! Everyone was in these amazing ball-gowns and really fancy suits, all proper dressed up for the occasion. I can’t even remember what we were wearing ourselves but we were all sitting there with these huge hot dogs covered in onions and mustard, trying to eat them without flicking sauce all over the place. Justin Timberlake got on stage and did this incredible performance, the crowd was going wild, there’s wall to wall famous people looking amazing everywhere, but we’re just trying to eat these hot dogs and have a laugh. At one point I noticed Louis just sniggering away, and then he leans over to me and says, ‘Niall, we’re hands down the worst celebrities on this planet!’