by M Dauphin
Halfway through the night she sighs and curls into me. Had I been asleep I would have missed it, but I haven’t slept a wink yet. I can’t stop thinking about her being so close to me. When she sleepily moved to lay on my arm I let her, afraid to wake her. Then her leg went over mine and I was done for.
Letting this one go was going to be the hardest thing I will ever have to do. But that’s just it, I will HAVE to let her go.
Chapter 9
Gwynn
It takes me a moment to realize where I am when I wake up, but once I do I really don’t want to look around. I want to curl up and stay here forever. That’s honestly the scariest thought I’ve ever had, but it doesn’t bother me as much as I thought it would. There were no dreams last night about that horrible night for the first time in weeks. I’m warm, snuggled into him, and I don’t care. I should, I should care deeply that this man that I can’t get off of my mind is letting me snuggle him like this, but I can’t find it in me to worry about it. Something about this guy tells me he felt the same exact way.
He’s sleeping soundly as I look up at him. Stubble is growing on his jawline from what looked like a few days of not shaving. His hair is buzzed short, but he has a full head of it. The muscles on this man are impeccable. It wouldn’t surprise me if he were a fighter, the way that even when he’s relaxed you can see the muscle definition.
I start looking over his tattoos. They cover almost every inch of skin from his shoulder down to his wrists. Almost. There are tribal designs, letters that may have spelled words if I could get a better look, and a name across his collarbone. I wonder if any of these have true meaning to him, or if he just wanted something to cover his skin. I wonder about him, about his past, about what makes him who he is now. My hand comes up to trace one of the black lines that run down and around his arm. He stirs at my touch, but doesn’t wake. My fingers graze along the lines, following them like a maze without an ending. When I graze along a bump I stop. Looking more closely at the area my finger just touched, I see a raised portion under the tattoo, almost like a burn scar. What is that?
Before I’m able to inspect it any further I hear my phone buzzing from the side table. Grabbing it before he wakes up, I head into the living room to answer it without even looking at who it was.
“Yes?” I answer.
“Gwynnie the great, how the FUCK are you?!” Jase’s sarcastic tone booms through the phone. I sigh, here we go.
“Fine Jase. Keep it down please.”
“You still over at your neighbor’s place? Have a fun time last night, huh? Good for you girl!” He seems incredibly weird about this whole thing.
“Yea. Listen I’ve got to go. I’ll call you later.” I hang up before he can respond. He’s been so weird lately. That, or I have finally started seeing his behavior for what it really is, which is damn weird.
Minutes after I hang up my phone buzzed again, this time in my hands. I check the caller ID to see my trainer’s number.
“Hey Mac, what’s up” I say, slipping into the hall.
“I got you lined up for tonight. I know it’s not your normal night, but you are well rested enough to add in a fight this week. You in?”
“Absolutely, send me the details.” Thank god, I need this. The man inside that apartment is anything but good for me, but I can’t resist him. There’s some sort of connection between us that I don’t want to break. I feel like I need him to stay balanced, which is nuts since I just met him.
Heading back into the apartment to grab my things, I am hoping to get out of here unscathed. If he wakes before I go, then we get to have the awkward ‘goodbye’ and all that shit that I don’t feel like dealing with. Sleeping was great, the best sleep I have had in a while, and he is just delicious to look at, but I don’t feel like dissecting our feelings at this point in the day. I have a fight to get ready for.
Luckily he’s still out and I grab my things and leave. Heading downstairs to the bar, I pull up the number to a locksmith to get the lock on my door fixed. Luckily they can be here in twenty minutes, leaving me just enough time to get my things and head over to the gym to get warmed up.
Nights before fights are always busy, tonight being no different. Once I finally make it to the gym to meet Mac, after paying an arm and a leg to get my broken key out of the doorknob, I’m ready to go. I’m pissed that I had to break into my savings over a stupid mistake on my part, and I’m feeling very strange about last night still. Unsure about Jase and his actions as of recently, and still reeling from my emotions from being in Eddie’s bed, I was ready to hit something. Really hit something, or someone. Hopefully the ‘someone’ came first, because punching a wall was looking better and better as time slowly passed and I wasn’t in the ring.
I’ve never been a violent person, but ever since my dad died I found hitting things to be calming. It helps center me, just like the buzz of the tattoo gun except it helps make me money and not the opposite. Sure, the other fighters get their hits in, and I have lost my share of fights, but I was doing pretty damn good recently. Ever since my win a few weeks ago I was on a high, but I haven’t fought since Eddie, and I feel like my mind is whirling over things it shouldn’t be concentrating on so close to a match.
It’s finally my turn and when I hear my name announced in the small arena I get that familiar buzz. Texas isn’t big with MMA, but there’s enough underground buzz to help pay the bills. The girl I’m fighting tonight is my exact weight but has been fighting for about two more months than I have. I’m not worried, two months isn’t that huge of a difference and I have been training extra hard lately.
She gets in a few good licks during the first round, but it isn’t anything I haven’t handled before. My luck she’ll wear out faster than me, then I’ll go on attack. The entire first round I can’t get Eddie out of my head. I can’t focus and I know it’s affecting my work. By the end of the second round I’m getting pissed at myself that I can’t take this bitch down. I’ve handled people my weight before no problem, what’s so different about tonight?
I know what’s different; Eddie. He won’t leave my mind, I can’t stop worrying that he was pissed since I left him without saying goodbye, or worrying about whether he was worried about me or not. It’s the stupid shit like that running through my head that gives her the chance for her final jab, taking me down one final time. While I’m worrying about the man I had just met, the fighter before me takes her shot and gets me right in the temple.
I hear Mac yelling, see the lights on the ceiling and blur of people moving, but I can’t make anything out. Fuck that hurt! I keep trying to get up but everything is moving in circles so I lay down again, closing my eyes trying to make sense of how I just lost what should have been an easy fight.
Minutes later I’m being carried down the ring stairs and into the locker room. Sitting on the table I listen to Mac ream me a new one for loosing such an easy fight, as the doctor checks me out. I deserve it, I wasn’t in my right mind tonight. I won’t tell Mac this, but I know exactly what it was that made me loose the fight. The man that lives across from me won’t leave my mind alone. What the hell is wrong with me?
They make me go to the hospital to get a scan for the concussion they are pretty sure I suffered. Too many of these and a fighter’s career could be over. I can’t have that, I need this release.
After a few hours waiting in the waiting room, trying to keep myself awake, they finally take me back for the scan. I hate this part of losing. Sure, the embarrassment and lecture from Mac is bad enough, but having to be treated at the hospital adds an element to it that I hate. I hate hospitals.
Finally finishing up at about midnight Mac drives me home and drops me off at the curb, warning me not to sleep for a few more hours. Wonderful, I’m tired as hell and can’t go to sleep.
This night keeps getting better and better.
Chapter 10
Eddie
She was gone when I woke up, but I knew she was leaving. When she started t
racing my tattoos I should have stopped her, I knew what she was going to find. Her touch was so soft, so sweet, that I didn’t have it in me to stop her. It sent waves of pleasure straight through me just to have her touching my fucking arm and I couldn’t stop imagining how amazing it would feel to have her touching the rest of me.
Sure, she saw at least one scar that I know of, but I couldn’t stop her if I tried. It was like this woman held a spell over me. Every time she was around my logical brain turned off and parts of me that hadn’t been working in years started working again. A heart that I had tried turning off from the world started beating, feelings I thought I had pushed out came back. Now I sit here wondering where she is and what she is doing.
I’m not mad, I know why she left in such a hurry, but I still wonder what would have happened had she stayed. I’m so confused with all of these fucking feelings. I know I should leave her the hell alone, but I can’t. I physically can’t stay away from her...she’s my neighbor!
I spend the entire rest of the day working on my computer system at home, rebooting, revising, and uploading new software; trying to keep my mind off of her. Right now I’m in-between jobs and have a little time for some upgrades without interfering with my work, so I do as much as I can. I never know when the next big job will hit and render me useless until it’s completed, so I take advantage of the free time I do have.
As if I spoke the devil’s name himself, my phone rings right as I finish up the last of the installments to upgrade my system.
“Hey man, long time to talk,” I say, knowing from the ringtone alone who it is on the other line.
“Not long enough. No offense man, but I feel like every time I call you it’s for the wrong reasons,” Tatum groans. Boy do I know, ever since he met Molly he has been involved with more trouble than he seemed to get in before her.
I have known Tatum for years now, met him randomly at a bar in L.A. We hit it off, kept in touch, and when I needed a job he hooked me up. Coming from different sides of the tracks, so to say, we didn’t really see much of each other. Everything changed with Molly went missing. I was honestly surprised he found her after all that time, but he did and he has never been happier. It worries me now, though, with him calling at almost midnight in the middle of the week.
“What’s wrong, dude?”
“Nothing yet. It’s my dad that needs help this time. Now, I know how you feel about these types of situations, but you are the best at what you do, and we need you.”
“Spill it, I don’t have time for you to sugar me up dude.” I knew where this was heading.
“His name is Tony Lodge. He’s wanted in a few states over the course of a few years for beating and roughing women up. The last one he was accused of beating died yesterday. My dad knew her late husband and has taken it upon himself to find this man before the police do.”
“That’s all I needed to hear. I’m in, send me the details.”
“One glitch...he needs you with him in person. In Philly.”
“Excuse me?” I vowed never to go back there.
“It’s important to him. I don’t know why, but he asked for you personally. He trusts you man. Everything will be paid before you leave and he is doubling your pay just to travel back there.”
Shit, I can’t let them down. The Savage family has been so good to me through these years, the last thing I want to do is piss them off.
“Fine. When do I leave?” I growl. Tatum chuckles at my anger.
“I’m waiting outside asswipe. Grab your bag.”
Mother fucker! I hang up and throw some clothes in a bag along with a couple laptops and head out the door. As appreciative for the Savage family as I am, it’s infuriating how they feel they can control everything about my life. They pay too damn good to bitch about it though.
Heading down the first flight of stairs checking that I have everything I need, I hear the door slam shut and footsteps start up the stairs. I freeze in place. That has to be Red, Tatum doesn’t have a key to the downstairs door.
Waiting for her to round the corner, I brace myself for those eyes to connect with mine. She rounds the corner, hood pulled over her head moving slower than usual. She doesn’t look up until she bumps into me.
“Shit sorry.” She mumbles as she looks up to see who she just ran into.
Mother fucker, what the hell? Her face is puffy, split lip, and she has a massive bruise on her temple. I’m furious, and have the sudden urge to kill whoever did this to her.
“What happened to you?”
“This morning? Sorry, I had to head out to take care of stuff.”
“Don’t be coy. What’s wrong with your face?”
“Excuse me?”
“Your face, the bruises, what the hell happened?” Her eyes go wide as I ask the question but she doesn’t answer.
Tatum chose that moment to yell up the stairs.
“COME ON FUCKER! PLANE IS WAITING!”
“Looks like you have to go. See ya.” She pushes past me and into her apartment. I growl and storm down the stairs, not even acknowledging Tatum the entire drive to the plane.
I’m beyond pissed and there isn’t a damned thing I can do about it. What the hell has happened to me?! She isn’t mine, nor will she ever be mine. I don’t physically harm people. Ever. I never have had the feeling to go after someone, but seeing her like that set me off. Tatum notices my mood but luckily he doesn’t say anything. I might go ape-shit on him for dropping this trip on me so last minute if he does.
Now I have to wait god-knows how long to find out what happened to her. And I get to spend the entire trip worried about her. What has this girl done to me?
Chapter 11
Gwynn
Luckily I don’t have to be at work today until two. I woke up a couple hours ago and have a massive headache still. The bruising isn’t going down and neither is the swelling, but it has only been about twelve hours since the fight so hopefully it’ll start going down soon.
I was so embarrassed when I ran into Eddie last night I’m pretty sure I came off as a bitch. I was on the top of my game but got beat pretty damn bad last night. I’m lucky I didn’t get hurt worse, actually. My mind needs to refocus, and heading back to work would hopefully do just that. I have another fight in three days, pending my injuries heal enough, so before work I head down to the gym for a quick workout.
I keep trying not to think about him. Obviously he had somewhere to be last night or he wouldn’t have left in such a hurry. His friend was annoying but maybe it’s because he was so damn loud. I haven’t heard him come home so I’m assuming it’ll be a few days before he’s back. I remember something about a plane waiting on them, so it’s safe to say I have a few days to mull things over.
Eddie is everything I thought I never wanted. I had a plan, and now I don’t want to move forward with that plan. Our connection is insane. One look from him tells me so much but not enough all at the same time.
Going into work tonight will be a great thing to get my mind off of him. Hopefully we will be busy so I won’t have much time to think. I need to talk to Jase, also, to try and clear the air between us. How have things gotten so complicated in just a week?
I get into work a half hour early and Marty, the bartender on days, winces when he looks at me.
“Girl what happened to you?”
“Thanks man, love you too,” I grunt as I put my stuff away.
“Seriously, you okay to work tonight?” He asks with the most sincere tone. Marty is about fifteen years older than me and really doesn’t have a life outside the bar. No wife, no kids, he chooses to live a life alone and is completely happy with it. I wish I could be happy with my life, but so far nothing has been working out for me.
“I’m fine Marty. Head on out, I’ve got things under control.” He’s the only ‘father figure’ in my life, worrying about me just like a real father would. I appreciate it, but it also drives me nuts sometimes.
After he leaves it’s just me and
the bar. At around five people start pooling in, grabbing tables and dart boards. Typical college kids start crowding the bar and before I know it it’s almost one am and I’m making last call. I haven’t had a night this busy in a long time and I’m pumped that I just made a killing in tips and I don’t have to split them with anyone.
After closing up I check my phone to see a few texts from Jase. Instead of texting him back I call him.
“Hey Gwynn. How are you?” he asks coldly. Shit.
“Good Jase, thanks for asking. I was hoping we could meet for a drink. I need to talk to you about some things.” I hear him sigh and cuss before answering.
“Sure, tell me where and I’ll be there.”
I rattle off a bar close to his apartment and head out the door, checking the locks as I go. This isn’t going to be a fun conversation, but I feel like it needs to be said. The entire cab drive over there I’m preparing myself for the worse. Jase is the only real friend I have left. Sure, Hallie is here for me when she’s in town, but she moved in with her fiancé and has since pretty much disappeared from my life. If I lose Jase I’m not sure what I’ll do with myself when things get bad.
After I pay the cab driver I head inside the bar, grab a water, and head for a table towards the back where it is quieter. When Jase walks in the door, he sees me and grabs a beer before heading over. Sitting down he smiles at me, waiting for me to talk. This isn’t going to be as easy as I hoped.
“Hi,” I say.
“Hi yourself. How’s your neighbor?” Wow he really is pissed about that.
“It’s not what he made it sound like Jase.” Why am I defending myself, why would he care who I’m fucking? Not that we did, but still.
“Okay, tell me what it was then Gwynn.” He glares at me, a side of Jase I have never seen was starting to come out.
“You know I broke my key. I thought he’d be able to fix it but he couldn’t. You were already gone so I crashed on his couch for the night. End of story.” What’s a little white lie?