“I’m sorry we were late,” he finally whispered, taking my hand. We walked down the street toward the park two blocks from the center of town.
“It’s fine. I’ve missed Kenna, and we got to talk and hang a bit, just us girls.”
He rubbed his thumb over mine, going quiet.
“You okay?” I held his wrist with my free hand, wanting nothing more than to hug him, to pull him close.
“I’m fine.”
I frowned. “You’re not fine. If you were, you would’ve had me in a car by now and taken me home.” I grinned and tugged him across the street at the first sign of the park. “A few minutes after that, you’d be inside me in your new king-size bed.” The one that had just been delivered today.
The first flash of a smile since we’d met up showed on his face as he followed my lead. “Would I now?”
I nodded and walked us toward the only slide there, the moonlight reflecting off the silver metal of its wide base.
“Uh-huh.” I smiled, feeling brazen as I lay down on the slide, urging him to lie on top of me. Obliging, he snuggled over my body, straddling my hips, his smile still holding strong.
The space was tight, the metal cold, but having Collin this close warmed me to my soul.
I nipped at his neck. “You going to tell me what’s wrong now?”
He groaned. “Coercion is not your best game, beautiful.”
“I beg to differ.” I kissed a path to the other side of his face, grinning against his ear as I said, “I think I’m quite skilled at coercion.”
A warm laugh slipped from his mouth. “I’m startin’ to think you’re right.”
“Talk to me, Collin.”
A shuddering breath blew from his mouth as I pulled the tip of his ear between my teeth.
“Just didn’t like that I couldn’t be there to knock McIntire on his ass. Hate that guy. Hate having him in the same room as you.”
I pushed him up a little to look into his eyes, my hands never leaving his cheeks. His need to take charge and be the big, bad protector used to bother me, but I knew now that it was just him—who he was. And even though it took some getting used to, I was starting to do just that.
“You know I’ll always be there for you, right? You and Chloe are my life.”
My chest warmed. “And you two are my life as well.”
He shut his eyes, inhaling as though he was taking in this moment with all of his senses. After that, he kissed my forehead and I shut my eyes too, which in turn had him leaning down to kiss each of my eyelids. His warm breath was the perfect blanket from the cold air, and I wrapped my arms around his waist, needing him closer. He lowered his chest back to mine, and I could feel the beating of his heart. It was a rhythm I’d never grow tired of.
“But what happens if I’m not always there?”
“No buts. No what-ifs either.” I shook my head. “Don’t forget, I have been on my own for years now, and I do know how to take care of myself.”
He frowned, opening his mouth only to close it again, until he finally nodded in consent.
Knowing I had the ability to calm the anxiety inside him, I pulled his head closer to mine again. “I’m okay, Collin.”
“I know.” He shut his eyes, the tension seeping from his body. As a reward, I softly kissed his lips. In response, they formed the perfection of a smile.
“Let’s talk about what I’d be doing to you if I had you in my bed again.” He tugged my sleeves, pulling my favorite pink coat off me in seconds. I didn’t even have time to care before he pressed his mouth to my neck. With his free hand, he slowly undid the buttons of my red shirt.
I moaned as he splayed his warm palm over my stomach. “You’d touch me.” I lifted my hips, rubbing against his.
“Where?” He kissed a path up my neck, then my chin, before hovering over my mouth.
Snow fell around us, tiny droplets sticking to his dark hair. The lone light in the park acted like a spotlight on our bodies, urging me to speak.
“Here.” I grabbed his hand from my stomach and placed it on top of my breast. “You’d touch me here.”
He groaned, lips still barely touching mine. I could almost taste the beer on his mouth, the mint from his toothpaste too. I wanted him to kiss me again, but I wanted to look into his eyes even more than that.
“Then what would happen?” he whispered, never moving the hand, never moving his mouth closer either. My stomach tingled in awareness as his erection pressed against my jeans.
“You’d pull the edge of my bra down”—which he did, the lace caressing my sensitized nipples—“then you’d roll the tip of one of them between your fingers.”
“You mean your nipples.” One side of his mouth tipped up as his fingers skillfully worked as I suggested.
I moaned and my eyes half closed as I nodded.
Unable to help myself, I wrapped my legs around his hips, arching closer. The friction I desired to curb the ache between my hips wasn’t anywhere close to what I needed yet.
Without him asking this time, I continued to speak, practically panting as I told him what would happen next. “Then I’d reach down to stroke you.” I lowered my hands, undoing the button of his pants, then the zipper. With my feet, I tugged his jeans and boxers down below the rounded globes of his perfect ass. Then with no second thoughts, I took him in my hand, stroking him, just as he lowered his mouth to my nipple.
“Collin,” I groaned, the new sensation overriding my ability to think.
He reached down and flicked open the button of my jeans. How he stayed upright was beyond me. But I wasn’t about to complain. Not when he was in the process of stripping my panties down to my knees too. I centered his cock against me, but he made no move to enter my body, just hovered and looked—down at my exposed breasts hanging over the lace of my bra, then at my eyes, which I’m sure flickered with a heat that matched his own.
“Now is the part where you’d fuck me.” I bit my lip, hoping for just that. He’d always been gentle with me, never truly losing control.
He lowered his mouth, biting at my chin, then whispered in my ear, “You done trying to tell me how to do my job?”
I froze, the nails on my free hand digging into his ass now. My hand around his erection loosened until he reached down and squeezed my fingers around the base for me.
I frowned. “Are you kidding right now?”
His lips twitched. “You’re bossing me.”
I narrowed my eyes. “You boss me all the time.” I squeezed my hand harder, tugging up on the head of his erection. Not enough to hurt him, but enough for a warning to flash through his eyes.
“That’s what I do. Take what I want.”
I rolled my eyes. “You, sir, are a sicko.”
He laughed, lowering his forehead to mine. “I’m your sicko, sweetheart.”
I sighed, frustration diminishing as I kissed his chin, then his cheek. “That you are, Number Six.”
He nodded. “Forever, Addison. I’m yours forever.”
My heartbeat skipped at his words, and a lump of emotion built in my throat when I tried to swallow. It wasn’t the first time he’d mentioned spending forever with me, but it was the first time I could feel it latch on to my heart. “Collin…I am so in lov—”
Then he kissed me, cutting me off, that word forever meaning more than I deemed imaginable for a guy like Collin, for a girl like me.
Then he did exactly what I’d wanted and sank inside me.
“Now, we fuck.”
And if there was one thing Collin did well, it was make good on his words.
Chapter 36
Collin
It was two days before Christmas when my life took a turn for shit.
Hell, if I was being honest with myself, things had started going downhill the night Amy’s parents got into town. I tried like
hell to pretend it was a good thing, that having a piece of Amy there all the time was gonna be good for my girl. But the more time I spent with Suzie and Alexander, the more distanced Addison seemed to get.
My nerves were constantly shot, as I worried she’d run out on me like she’d done the day she met them. Her standoffish attitude since then hadn’t escaped me. And other than the Saturday night we’d met up at O’Paddy’s, and the nights in between we’d spent in each other’s arms, I felt like she was slipping away.
One of the first things outta my mouth when my sister and I had sat across from Amy’s parents back on the night they took us out to dinner was: I love Addie. They took the announcement well and even asked if we could all have dinner together sometime, surprise, surprise. Said they wanted to meet and get to know the girl who’d become so vital to Chloe’s life.
Now there we were—the four of us—without the safety net that came with Beaner, my sister, or my buddies. Awkward was a damn mild word compared to what this night was turning into. Every time I looked at Suzie, it was like the ghost of Amy was sitting there with her. Judging, watching, silently waiting for Addie to screw up. It made me nervous as hell.
“So, Collin tells us you used to be a preschool teacher.” Alexander slung his arm around the back of his wife’s chair, Scotch glass dangling from his fingers.
I lowered my arm around Addison’s chair too, slipping the ends of her hair between my fingers. Like a magnetic force, she moved closer to me, her thigh going flush with mine.
Unaffected by the round of fifty questions, she nodded and smiled, the epitome of polite. “I was a preschool teacher, yes. I went to Western Illinois University and received my bachelor’s in early childhood education too.”
“How interesting. I could tell by your interactions with our granddaughter today that it’s a—how do I put this?—well-suited career choice for you.” Suzie reached across the table and picked up her napkin, laying it back on her lap. The whole time, I could see the silent judgment flashing in her eyes.
Amy was premed.
Amy was going to find the cure for cancer.
Amy, Amy, Amy.
I tried not to let it get to me, knowing she wasn’t doing it on purpose. No doubt this was just as weird for them as it was for us. Still, the tension radiating around the table was getting to me, making my shoulders stiff and my lower back burn in the hard chair.
Had nothing to feel guilty about myself—I’d finally figured that out. Addie came into my life at the moment she was meant to and filled the emptiness inside me, making me happier than anyone—besides Chloe—had ever done. That’s what mattered here. Nothing else.
For the next five minutes, once the conversation started flowing, I tried relaxing. But the top button of my shirt strangled the life outta me, along with the tie Addie insisted I wear. I cracked my neck, then checked my phone at least a half dozen times under the table, hoping there’d be an emergency at home with Chloe. Not a real emergency, but something that’d give us an excuse to leave. Like a diaper nobody could change.
Only good part about this night so far was the little blue number Addie had on her body. Just short enough to be considered sexy but long enough to be classy. It dipped low in the front and back both, and she wore a pair of black heels that I planned on having her wear tonight in bed—with nothing else.
Licked my lips just thinking about the things I wanted to do to her when I got her beneath me wearing fuck-me heels. With my mouth, my hands, maybe even the tie around my neck…
Hell yes. I’d definitely use the tie.
“But I’ve heard the pay is really nothing more than minimum wage. That’s the thing that has my mind boggled. It doesn’t sound like a career path one would want to take for the rest of their life, am I right?” Alexander leaned forward. His wife followed suit, pressing her hand against his shoulder. He whipped out a business card and flicked it between his fingers, staring once at me, then at Addie again.
“I do enjoy it though, sir. Not many people can say that about their jobs.”
My chest tightened with pride and I grinned, leaning over to kiss her temple. She’d had to defend her career choice for too long now—to her parents and now this man. I wasn’t about to let her continue.
“Doesn’t matter how much money she makes. I’ll take care of her in the end.”
Addie stiffened. I turned to get a read on her face but stopped when Alexander started in again.
“Still. If you are going to be in my granddaughter’s life, don’t you want to do everything you can to provide for her?” His gaze was still locked on Addie’s face, ignoring me. Sure as hell didn’t sit right in my damn gut. “Find a better-paying job to help cover expenses? Children are costly, and it’s near impossible to raise them on one income anymore, especially on the single income of a police officer.”
My spine went rigid.
The hell did he just say?
Addie quickly moved her hand to grip mine under the table, her gaze zooming in on my profile. I could feel the warning in her eyes as she stared at my face, but I couldn’t even spare her a look. No way in hell would I let this man try to tell me what I would or wouldn’t be able to do for my daughter and the woman I loved.
“I can assure you, sir, Chloe will be just fine financially on Collin’s income. Police officers make a great living.”
No matter what she seemed to say, Alexander kept. Fucking. Going.
“I’m not so sure about that, Addie. Which is why I want to offer you a job. I’m opening my own law practice right here in Carinthia and will be looking for a new secretary.” He winked at his wife, whose face had gone white.
Addie squeezed my hand harder, and I gritted my teeth together so tightly that my jaw ached.
“I would, in fact, double your salary, offer insurance, and—”
“She won’t need insurance when she marries me.” I balled my free hand into a fist, inhaling to cool the temper flaring inside me. “And I sure as shit can provide for her and Chloe on my salary just fine.”
“Collin, stop,” Addie hissed.
I didn’t. “Hell, if she didn’t want to, Addie would never have to work another day in her life.”
Addie jabbed me in the ribs, but I barely felt it.
“It’s the truth.” I glared at her; she glared back.
“Marriage?” Alexander scoffed and leaned back in his chair, bringing his wife along with him.
“Yes, sir. Plan on marrying her within the next year.” Daring him, I leaned forward in my chair this time. My jaw clenched and unclenched like my hand as I pulled it out of Addie’s hold to lower it around her thigh instead. She jumped, but I couldn’t stop. Needed to touch her bare skin so I could keep my head on straight—or distract myself from freaking the hell out.
Dark eyes narrowed, Alexander opened his mouth, probably to tell me off, but Suzie said first, “But you two have only known each other two months.” She looked to me, a plea in her eyes. “You and Amy were together for much longer than that, yet you didn’t ask her to—”
“Thank you, Alexander, for the job offer,” Addie said, her words fast yet poised, just enough to break through to me. “But unfortunately I will have to pass.” She cleared her throat. “I actually just received a call about a new job opening in Matoona. It’s for a lead teacher position in the district-run preschool. A dream job for me, really. The pay would be that of a teacher’s salary.”
What?
I froze, careful not to move a muscle, not even acknowledging the fact that Addie’s hand was now on my leg, squeezing—our roles reversed.
“That’s…that’s fantastic, Addison. I’m so glad you get to follow your dreams. N-not many people get to do that.” Suzie’s eyes filled with tears. She moved her chair back from the table, and the wood screeched across the floor, echoing around us in the restaurant. I was the only one who didn’t flin
ch at the noise. “Now, if you will all please excuse me,” she whispered, the sound barely reaching my ears over the roaring inside my head. “I need to use the ladies’ room.”
“Collin?” Addie touched my shoulder.
I shook my head, not giving a damn where we were as the words spilled out of my mouth. “You gonna leave us?” I asked Addie.
“Leave you?” She jerked back. “Why would I leave you?”
“You’re gonna find a new job, gonna leave us for something better.” I know I sounded like a goddamn idiot, a child even, but everything she was saying…everything she didn’t say… I couldn’t help myself.
I pinched the bridge of my nose, the paranoia too much. I had to get out of here. Get her out of here.
“Well, this dinner was stimulating to say the least.” Alexander chuckled and folded his arms over his coat as he looked at his watch.
From across the table, I glared at him. “Yeah. And a big mistake, actually.” I stood and reached for Addie’s arm to pull her up with me.
“Collin, stop it.” Addie stood up too and pressed her chest against my arm. Not even the feel of her breasts against me could curb my anxiety. “You’re making a scene.”
“Don’t give two fucks.”
Her eyes widened. “Do not talk to me like that. I am not one of the guys from your unit. And you are not my father either. I. Am. Your. Girlfriend.”
“I think I’m just going to go find my wife and take off. Don’t worry about the meal. We will take care of the bill,” Alexander said.
“No.” I jerked my finger at him, then motioned for the waiter, the pain of Addie’s words slicing through me. Still, I couldn’t control myself. “I’m payin’ for dinner.”
“Really, Collin. Let us—”
“I’m. Paying.”
Alexander lifted his hands in defense, zeroing in on Addie, who’d taken two steps back and was already grabbing for her coat. No. No. No.
Needing to hold her close, not let her go, I reached for her back just as Suzie approached.
Reckless Hearts Series, Book 1 Page 25