The Drumbeat of His Heart

by M. C. Roth

  “Sandwich bags? Do I even want to know?” Ian relaxed with a huff of air. He leaned back against the metal server cover. “I wanted to take care of you too.” He sounded indignant, as if Trent had dared steal an orgasm from him.

  “You’re staying for Christmas, right?” Trent asked. He perked up as he imagined every scenario that had crossed his mind in preparation for the holidays. There were a few spaces that he’d left deliberately tinsel-free.

  “Of course.” Ian nodded. A beautiful warmth bloomed in Trent’s chest and a smile practically beamed from his lips.

  “Then make it up to me,” said Trent as he moved in close. He risked another erection as he slid his lips against Ian’s. “I really don’t want to get caught by Belinda either. She’s just nasty. I’d rather not lose my job right before Christmas. The boss likes her and she already holds it against me that I’m gay.”

  Ian hummed against his lips in agreement. “Can’t imagine how that feels,” he said sarcastically.

  Trent pulled back and really looked at Ian for the first time. There were dark bags under those clear blue eyes and a red tinge to the whites. His kiss-swollen lips were dry and chapped, and his normally clean-shaven face had a scratchy dark growth. Trent ran his hand over Ian’s smooth scalp. He must’ve been naturally bald, as there was no hint of growth there at all.

  “Are you okay? You look…” Trent trailed off.

  “Like shit, I know.” Ian let out a tiny smile. “I’m good, really good actually. I’m just so fucking tired. My flight was supposed to land yesterday, but it was delayed for eighteen hours. Eighteen hours of sitting in the same lounge with some teenager who was going to see her dad. She spent half her time freaking out about who I was, and the other half complaining about her life. I swear to God that if I see her again, I won’t be able to help myself. I’m gonna fuckin’ strangle her.” He let out a small laugh before he shrugged. “Busiest time of the year to travel and I barely managed to get a ticket last-minute.”

  “I’m so glad you’re here,” said Trent as he pulled Ian in for another hug. “I was so surprised! Why didn’t you tell me you were coming? I would’ve taken the day off and picked you up.”

  “I wanted to surprise you at work,” said Ian as he burrowed his face into Trent’s hair. “I had the whole thing planned. I was going to come here with a bouquet that would make all the office bitches jealous. I was going to sing for you and pick you up and spin you around. Sweep you off your feet.” Ian pulled back with a grin. “But I could never quite predict anything about you. The flowers wilted the second they got out of the shop and into the snow. I didn’t know it got so fucking cold here. How do you stand it?”

  Trent shrugged as his face heated at the idea of Ian doing something so kind for him.

  “Then,” Ian continued, “you aren’t even at your desk. You’re buried in an air conditioner in the middle of a room hot enough to be a sauna. You looked so good in there with your shirt rucked up around your waist and your feet kicking as you tried to pull yourself farther under there. I was speechless. You didn’t even know it was me. So, I just poked you with my foot. Sorry… It wasn’t very romantic.”

  “I loved it.” Trent smiled and pulled away. “Really though, Ian, are you okay? Everything with the guys? I can kick their asses if you need me to.” He smacked Ian’s chest as the man looked him up and down with a raised eyebrow. “Hey, I was wrestling champion when I was in high school. I was also the biggest guy in my class, but that doesn’t matter. I would defend you because I love you.”

  Ian’s smile was so pure that it wiped the look of utter exhaustion off his face. “They’re good, T. They each took it their own way, just like everybody, but they know me. I think they were actually relieved that I finally told them what was up. I felt bad keeping something like that, like you, from them. I love you, but I love them too. It feels really good for them to know.”

  “And your mom?” Trent cringed internally. He remembered what Ian had said about his family. A part of him hoped that it was an exaggeration, but he’d began to doubt that the longer he knew him. Ian hardly ever exaggerated.

  “Let’s hope she never fucking finds out.” He let out an explosive sigh. “The rest of the family is easy. I don’t care about what they think, but my mom is my mom. She can always hurt me, even if I try to ignore it. I’m lucky that she doesn’t do social media, or even the news. The rest of the family wouldn’t want to be the ones to break the news to her either.”

  Trent pulled him back in for a hug and placed a kiss on Ian’s chin with a small wince as the scruff bit into his sensitive lips.

  A knock sounded at the door behind them. Ian’s arms tightened just a fraction before they fell away. The knock came again, impatient and immediate in a familiar pattern. Trent waited while Ian scrambled with the last of his pants, slipping them up his hips and buckling them. Despite the slightly bruised lips and the flush on his face, he looked presentable. The flush could be blamed on the heat of the room anyway.

  “Trent, are you in there or not?” a familiar female voice said from the other side of the thin door. “My whole screen is frozen and blue. It wasn’t even my fault, Trent. I was out of the room when it happened.” Her voice was escalating, like it always did when she didn’t get an immediate response. Trent doubted that she’d ever heard of the word patience.

  After flipping the lock, he pulled open the door just a crack and Candace pushed it open the rest of the way before she moved into the room. He narrowly missed the elbow that would’ve struck his solar plexus if he hadn’t been paying attention. As the door slid shut, she stuttered to a halt. Her eyes caught Ian, leaning against the server with his arms crossed, before they snapped to Trent. Trent flushed even more as her eyes widened.

  “Oh my God, are you fucking in here?” Candace hissed just a fraction too loud.

  Trent shook his head as his flush spread down his face to his neck, while Ian burst out laughing. His shoulders rolled as he bent over and clutched his gut. His laughter was warm and loose in a way that only happened after sex.

  “Oh my God, you did!” Her voice dropped into a high-pitched whisper. “Trent, you are such a slut. At work? What if you got caught?” Her lips spread in a wide smile, even as she condemned them. She let out a long groan. “That’s so hot.” She peered around Trent’s shoulder to Ian. “Love the post, by the way, Ian. This little shit doesn’t deserve you.”

  Trent knew she meant it in humour and light spirits, but the words made him flinch. It was true. He didn’t deserve Ian. The man was the best person he’d ever met. He hardly ever asked for a thing, and he gave everything in return. Trent had never gifted him flowers on a sad day or made declarations of love to anyone who would listen.

  “You’re wrong.” Ian cut off his line of thinking with a shake of his head. “T changed my life for the better. He’s the one who made me into a good man. Without him, I’d still be some asshole too close to the edge to care.”

  Trent’s mouth fell open at the same time as Candace broke into a smile. “Good, I’m glad you see that.” She turned to Trent and pulled him into a hug. “Get out of here, Trent. I’ll cover for you. Have a Merry Christmas.”

  “Just don’t touch anyone’s computer,” said Trent as she pulled the door back open and disappeared. He hoped she didn’t actually try to cover for him. The place wouldn’t be standing by the time he got back. “Just give me five minutes,” he said as he turned back to Ian.

  Trent propped the door back open, this time with an actual doorstop, before he rolled the AC unit close to the computer server. Ian strolled out of the door and to the front desk, looking much more put together than he had any right to be. Every eye in the office was drawn to him as he strolled through the tight quarters. Some looked in open appreciation, and a few in recognition.

  Trent could only watch him and wonder how he’d managed to snag this beautiful man. And how, with every eye on him, Ian managed to look back and give Trent the barest of winks. It was lik
e he didn’t even see the others looking at him from behind their glass doors.

  It was easy to make his excuses when he approached his supervisor. The man only grunted once and shrugged. Trent hardly ever took time off or even asked to leave early. As long as the sever was fixed, the man couldn’t care less. Trent left his office with a cheery ‘Happy holidays’.

  He rushed past the door where Ian was leaning over Belinda’s desk. A small crowd of people, most of them women, had gathered next to the water cooler that just happened to be across from the workspace. Suddenly they all had to fill their glasses at the same time. They whispered to each other as they cast fleeting glances at Ian, who took it all in stride with a nonchalant ignorance.

  Belinda was basking under the attention as Ian spoke quietly to her. No one would ever have known that she was married by the way she leaned over to show off her bosom to the attractive stranger. Her thin lips curled up into a smile as she forced out a laugh that was too long to be real. She kept her left hand hidden beneath the desk the entire time.

  Ian’s eyes lit up as Trent approached, and he pushed himself off the desk. He rolled his eyes just enough for Trent to see as he glanced over at Belinda and the steadily growing crowd. She frowned when she saw Trent approaching, her narrow eyes criticizing every bit of him in a few calculating seconds.

  “Ready to go?” Ian asked as he reached out and slid his hand into Trent’s. He tugged hard, throwing Trent off balance and pulling him in for a chaste kiss. Trent melted into the soft gesture that gave him more butterflies in his stomach than was strictly necessary. He heard Belinda gasp with a sound of absolute horror as she rocked back in her chair. He suppressed a snort at the shallow woman.

  “Good to go, love,” said Trent. The words slipped out of his mouth like they were meant to be there. If Ian’s positive reaction was anything to go by, Trent would be saying them much more often. “Happy holidays, Belinda. Say hi to Peter for me.” Trent let out an innocent smile at her glower. He couldn’t imagine what her husband saw in her. Maybe it was the fake nails, fake tits and fake ass. That much plastic made Trent want to shudder.

  “Happy holidays, everyone.” Trent turned and waved at the small crowd with more warmth. A few waved back, but most were standing in open-mouthed shock.

  Trent pulled his coat over his shoulders before he noticed that Ian was still in just a T-shirt. “Where’s your coat?”

  “I have a sweater in the rental car, but I didn’t exactly get a coat. I didn’t think it would be this cold.” He shrugged.

  Trent pulled the coat right back off before he handed it to Ian. He waved away the other’s protests before he could get them out. “It should fit you. I bought it on clearance and they only had too-big sizes left. It works, though.” He shrugged and Ian reluctantly pulled it on. It fit perfectly over his broad shoulders. “I’ve got another one at home anyway.” The other one was worn and had three good-sized holes in it, but that didn’t matter.

  “Thanks.” Ian flushed and lowered his head just a fraction. It was the same submission he’d shown in the server room. Trent couldn’t help the thrill that ran through his belly. Other partners had given him that same look before as he took control in bed. It was the look he’d tried so desperately to get away from when he’d first found Ian. Somehow it wasn’t the same this time. He wanted it from Ian more than anyone else in the world. Maybe because he knew he could do the same thing and Ian would snap to his side and sweep him off his feet in an effort to look after him.

  Ian’s rental was parked right in front of the glass double doors. The front windshield was covered in fresh snow and the black paint was almost completely obscured by gathering wind-swept drifts.

  Trent shivered in the sudden wind and hurried behind Ian. The temperature had dropped as the day had moved on, and the snow had got deeper. The powdery white stuff made its way over the top of his shoes and worked down his ankles. His boots were still under his desk where he’d forgotten them. His socks were bound to be soaked in minutes, but he hoped it didn’t matter. He was planning on being naked sooner than that.

  He wiped his bare hands over the windshield and side windows quickly as Ian climbed in. A glance at the make of the car had him smirking. The last car he’d seen Ian driving had been worth more than Trent made in a year. At least the colour had improved.

  He was shivering and out of breath by the time he tumbled into the passenger seat. He moved the bouquet of flowers from beneath him to the centre console. They had probably been beautiful before the winter chill had struck the tender petals. Now they were stained brown and wilted to almost nothing.

  The seat was stone cold, but the first whisper of heat was blasting out of the tiny air vents.

  “A Hyundai? That’s a far cry from a Corvette,” said Trent as his smile spread wider at Ian’s blush.

  “It was all they had left.”

  Trent burst out laughing. “I guess that means car sex is out. If we are going to fuck in a car, I require leather seats.”

  “That’s it!” Ian slammed the gas too hard and they lurched backwards. “I’m returning this piece of crap and getting a hummer. Nothing is keeping me from fucking my willing lover in a car. It would be so hot,” Ian groaned in longing.

  “Yeah, it would be great to get twisted into a pretzel and be afraid that any minute, I could slip and end up with a gear-shift up my ass. I’d get a concussion if I tried to ride you. I think I might break my neck trying to give you head,” said Trent as he shook his head. They would need a limo to make it work.

  Ian pulled out into the dismal holiday traffic that was nearing rush hour in town. That meant that there were two other cars on the road between the office and Trent’s house.

  Trent popped the button on his jeans and pulled the remaining bit of tucked shirt out of his pants. He was already hard again and pressing insistently into a thin zipper. The zipper eased down one tooth at a time with almost-silent clicks. The cool air of the car soaked through his boxers and into his heated cock, and the change in temperature had him biting back a moan. Ian’s eyes flashed to his and dipped to the opening in his pants before flickering back to the road. The engine gave a deep roar as he pressed the accelerator.

  They were at Trent’s home in record time. Trent snapped off the buckle of his seatbelt, but Ian was already free and climbing out of the car. The passenger door swept open and the cold wind cut Trent to the bone.

  “Get the fuck out of the car,” said Ian. His voice was so low that it was nearly a growl, and his eyes were blown wide with the edge of arousal.

  Trent half expected the man to simply pull him out of the car and throw him over his shoulder. Perhaps if Trent was a foot shorter… The dark look sent a thrill up his spine all the same, though. He knew how powerful Ian was, and how he could wring every bit of pleasure from him.

  He pulled the top of his pants together so he didn’t risk freezer burn. Then he was moving out of the car and to the house. Ian was a looming heat at his back that cut through the wind and kept him warm.

  The doorknob turned under his hand and Ian huffed under his breath as he pushed close to his back.

  “You mean it was unlocked this whole time?” asked Ian with a shake of his head. “Never in my life have I met someone who left their door unlocked all the time. I could’ve come here and made myself at home between your sheets. You would’ve come back to find me hard and waiting in your bed.”

  Trent’s shiver had nothing to do with the cold. He could imagine what it would be like to come home to find Ian there.

  “I’d like that,” he said genuinely. “Even if you were just in the kitchen when I got home or sitting in the back yard. I’d love to come home and find you here.” He left two words unsaid—the ‘every day’ that was echoing in his mind.

  The moment he was through the door, he let his pants splay wide again. The material was smooth and slid down his hips to the top of his thighs as he removed his soaking shoes. He toed off his socks next. The material was
damp from the brief moment in the snow.

  He went to pull his sweater over his head.

  “Please, let me.” Ian said as he moved in close and nuzzled against his neck. The scruff on his cheeks and chin scraped against the sensitive flesh and made the tiny hairs stand on end.

  “Take me to bed.”

  Trent turned his head and their lips met with a press of heat and a line of slick sweetness. Ian moved even closer, from hip to shoulder, against his back. Trent’s neck strained from the angle, but he refused to break the hold that they had on each other. If anything, he moved back to pull Ian closer.

  Ian pushed and dragged him from the front door to the kitchen, then at last to the bedroom. They passed decorations and Christmas treasures along the way, but Ian didn’t even seem to notice. Trent turned at the last moment and his knees buckled against the mattress. He fell into the soft covers that had felt so lonely the night before.

  Ian pressed down on him from above but kept his knees and hands on the bed to hold most of his weight. They scooted up the mattress together until the back of Trent’s head struck a pillow and he was fully on the bed.

  He tugged at Ian’s waist, which was too far above for his groin to reach. “You can lie on me. I can take it.” He tugged again at Ian’s hesitation. “I’m not gonna break.” All he wanted was to feel Ian pushing him relentlessly down onto the mattress. He wanted to rut up into that solid body that could dominate him in ways no one else could.

  Ian lowered himself, gently at first, then hard as he dropped the rest of his weight. The air pushed from Trent’s lungs and he struggled for a moment to catch his breath. Between the weight and the lips back on his, it was almost impossible to get a breath. It made his head swim in the most delicious way.

  “Please fuck me,” he found himself begging already. He frowned at the sudden chuckle vibrating against him.

  “So needy, T.” Their groins met in grinding thrust. “So good for me, but you were such a little tease when I was away. The things you’d say to me and whisper into my ear when you thought no one was around. I’d have to run to the bathroom to jerk off in a moving bus. You know what that’s like? No fucking fun, T. So, I have to pay you back for every single thing.” He punctuated the last three words with rolling thrusts.