Without

by E. E. Borton

  “Easy there, partner,” said the Bear. “Nobody here is looking for a fight.”

  As the hooves hit the asphalt, I took my hands off the shotgun, turning to see the two rangers on horseback. “Sorry, I thought you were a bear.”

  “I’ve been called worse, but most folks just call me Wes, or Ranger. This is my partner, Alison. Are you from these parts?”

  “No, sir,” I said. “I’m heading home. I’ve still got a ways to go.”

  “Where’d you start?” asked Alison.

  “Atlanta.”

  “Good Lord,” said Wes. “That’s a hell of a walk, son.”

  “I’ve had a few challenges.”

  “I bet.”

  “We’ve had a bunch of people come through, but nobody from as far as Atlanta,” said Alison. “Is it the same there as it is here? I mean, is anything working?”

  “No. It’s worse.”

  “How so?” asked Wes.

  “When I left, downtown was on fire,” I said. “The looting and killing started on the first day.”

  “I’m not surprised,” said Wes. “I was a cop down there for fifteen years. Any city is a bad place to be when the power goes out.”

  “That’s why I’m here,” I said. “I’m trying to put some distance between me and it.”

  “A good plan,” said Wes. “Where are you looking to bed down tonight? It’s gonna be dark soon.”

  “To be honest, I’m not even sure where I am,” I said. “This creek was a tad bigger this morning and I got caught up in it. It banged me up a little. I’d be grateful if you could point me in the direction of where I could put a solid roof over my head, preferably on high ground. I’m not a fan of sleeping outdoors these days.”

  “We can help you with that,” said Wes. “Our station is about two miles past this bridge down the trail. We’re heading back now. Would you like a lift?”

  “Yes, sir, I would.”

  Chapter 19

  The Good Guys

  Embarrassing myself, I needed Alison to give me a boost to get on the back of Wes’s horse. I was almost in tears the first time I tried. Hiding the pain wasn’t an option. On horseback I was able to put a couple miles under my feet that I didn’t have to walk. It was in the wrong direction, but I couldn’t care less.

  I knew any law enforcement in the city would be dissolved in a matter of hours after the event. Without communication or transportation, police officers were no better off than we were. Their only advantage over most was easy access to weapons and ammunition. In most contingency plans officers would fall back to defensive positions such as police stations or government buildings. After that I knew there were no plans.

  During the hurricane that erased Cape Cod, we learned a few things about civil obedience to established laws. There was none. Initial projections for the city of Boston after the storm were that two thirds of law enforcement evacuated with the civilians. Most were trying to get to their families, disregarding protocol to make sure their loved ones were safe. I don’t blame any of them.

  A sad statistic that emerged when the smoke cleared was that several officers committed suicide. The notes left behind were apologies to the people they swore an oath to protect. They were overwhelmed with the guilt of knowing their actions contributed to the deaths of both civilians and officers whom they left behind. The brave cops who stayed were grossly outnumbered by the roaming gangs of cowards taking whatever they wanted.

  “How many of you are there?” I asked, sliding off the horse. (The dismount was prettier.)

  “Including me, five rangers and a handful of others,” replied Wes. “We started with seven rangers, but I understand the reasons why the other two left. One has a daughter with leukemia and the other is the sole provider for a young family of six. They’re both good men. I suspect they’ll be returning with their people soon. We all have a better chance if we stick together. Things are gonna get worse in a hurry.”

  “Yes, they are,” I said, rubbing my side as we walked into the station.

  “You need to let Alison take a look at that,” said Wes. “She’s a damn good medic. You can stow your gear in the last room on the right. That’ll be your quarters for tonight.”

  “Wes,” I said, stopping him in the hall. “I’m grateful for what you’re doing for me. I know your resources are limited and strangers probably make you nervous.”

  “We’ve had our share of trouble, but so far nothing we couldn’t handle ourselves,” said Wes, patting his sidearm. “Sometimes you just know when folks are looking to cause problems. When we get that feeling, we handle it pretty quick. I don’t have that feeling with you.”

  “I won’t change that,” I said.

  “Let’s take a look at your ribs,” said Alison, walking in the building.

  I put down my pack – guns and all – in the room. I met Alison in the infirmary a few doors down. Their clinic was impressive for a ranger station.

  “I borrowed some things from a few abandoned ambulances in town,” said Alison, noticing me admiring their stock. “This used to be our classroom, but we had a feeling the power was going to be out for a while. Setting this room up was our second priority.”

  “What was the first?” I asked.

  “Burying our dead,” replied Alison. “We had some trouble on the first day.”

  “I’m sorry,” I said.

  “So were the ones that did it,” said Alison, lowering her head. She changed the subject. “Let’s take a look.”

  I unbuttoned my shirt, getting a good view of my injury for the first time. I was surprised at the ugly colors of the football-sized bruise.

  “Nice work,” said Alison. “You don’t know what it was?”

  “No idea,” I said. “I was too busy inhaling water.”

  “You’re lucky to be alive.”

  “I’ve said that to myself a few times this week.”

  I winced when she touched the bruise, but she was able to confirm they weren’t broken. There wasn’t much she could do except offer me a few pain pills. I didn’t want to take from them so I declined, letting her know I carried a bottle in my pack.

  “It’s what we can’t see that I’m worried about,” said Alison. “Developing pneumonia is fairly common after taking in a lungful of dirty water. It’ll take a day or two to start noticing any symptoms. You’re in good shape, so your chances of beating it are better than most. But if it starts beating you, we have broad-spectrum IV antibiotics we can give you. That should do the trick.”

  “Thanks, Doc,” I said, “but I need to head out at first light.”

  “That’s not a good idea,” said Alison. “I said you may beat it. More than likely someone will find your body on the side of the road in a few days. Why are you in such a rush? Family?”

  I didn’t answer.

  “Listen, just stick around for thirty-six hours,” said Alison. “By then we should know if you’re going to get sick. Wherever you need to go will still be there in a day and a half. You’ve made it almost ten days out there alone. That tells me you’re at least a little smart. So you tell me now, does walking away from a couple bags of fluid that could save your life sound smart?”

  “It does not,” I conceded.

  “Good,” replied Alison, smiling. “It’ll be nice talking to a new face over dinner.”

  “I don’t want to impose,” I said. “I have food with me.”

  “Nonsense. We have plenty. You need to save what you’re carrying for the road. We have a washroom out back in a shed. You’re filthy.”

  “That, I am,” I said, trying to run fingers through my mud-caked hair.

  “The others should be back shortly with dinner, but take your time getting cleaned up. I’ll put some clothes for you to wear by the shed door while yours dry.”

  “Thank you,” I said. “For everything.”

  “Our pleasure,” said Alison, leaving the room.

  I ran into two more rangers on my way out to the wash shed. They were inf
ormed of my presence, and like Wes and Alison they were very accommodating and hospitable. This group was well disciplined and confident. I attributed their state of readiness, and their high spirits, to a good leader.

  With so many guns in the hands of the good guys, I didn’t feel the need to carry mine. Under any other conditions I’d keep all of them within my reach. I liked to think they sensed that, if a fight came their way, I’d be standing beside them. The way they were treating me guaranteed it.

  When I walked inside the shed, I became more impressed with the rangers. The washroom was spotless. Two tubs of clean water, one with a washboard, were situated near a counter full of cleaning supplies. Beside the tubs was an ironing board. On the shelf beside it an antique iron, which I presumed they heated on the fire pit outside the door, answered my question about how they pressed their uniforms. But the pièce-de-résistance was the shower they had built.

  It was a large stall with some type of water supply coming from a pipe through the wall. I walked over to the only window on the shed to discover its source. They had built a tall platform with two steel barrels perched on top. Underneath was a fire pit to heat the water when the weather turned cold.

  These guys were not only well-disciplined and confident, they were highly efficient and incredibly resourceful. This ranger station was a great example of how people were going to survive in the coming months, or even years. As a team, they built replicas of modern conveniences without power that helped maintain morale and a sense of camaraderie. As a team, I knew they’d defend it with no hesitation. These were the type of people who didn’t give warnings. These were the people who had a chance.

  After taking a soothing shower and washing my clothes, I dressed for dinner. I walked out of the wash shed to four new faces setting up a large table on the deck. Each face smiled, acknowledging me as I walked back into the building. More new faces – civilians – were in the kitchen prepping the food. A cheerful elderly woman, introducing herself as Alison’s mother, even greeted me with a hug.

  “Alison told me we were going to have one more for dinner,” said Ms. Ashley. “She didn’t tell me you were such a handsome devil.”

  “Mom,” said Alison, walking into the conversation. “Give him a break. He’s had a long day.”

  “Oh, hush, child,” said Ms. Ashley, laughing.

  “Most of these folks are our family,” said Alison. “With the way the world was dropping hints, everyone knew to come here if things got bad.”

  “Am I the first straggler?” I asked.

  Everyone in the room fell silent.

  “I’m not what’s for dinner, am I?”

  Ms. Ashley howled. “I knew I liked you.” The others followed with laughter.

  “No,” answered Alison, smiling. “We have a few rules here within the group. One of them is, we can’t take care of everyone or we won’t be able to take care of our families. I know that sounds harsh, but –”

  “You don’t have to explain it to me,” I said. “I understand.”

  “If someone does come in needing help, we give it. They just can’t stay. We simply don’t have those kinds of resources yet. We’re working on that, too.”

  “It’s a good rule, Alison.”

  “The hardest part is turning away the young’uns,” said Ms. Ashley, stirring a pot on a gas stove. “I’m an old woman. I tried to convince them to let a little boy stay here in my place, but my Alison still needs me for a bit longer. That was a hard day. I know harder ones are coming.”

  “They are,” said Wes, walking into the kitchen. “But we’re gonna be just fine, Ms. Ashley. We’re gonna give a lot of folks a better chance to survive then they’d have without us. I hate turning them away, too. I really do hate it.”

  “I know you do, baby doll,” said Ms. Ashley. “You got yourself a lot of responsibility here and you’re doin’ a fine job.”

  “Thank you,” said Wes. “We’re all doing a fine job.”

  “But you got a funny one right there,” said Ms. Ashley, pointing at me with her wooden spoon. “You may want to keep him around.”

  “Take a walk?” asked Wes, looking at me.

  “Alison told me she asked you to stick around for a bit to see if any problems develop with your lungs,” said Wes, opening the front door for me. “I want you to know I’ve got absolutely no problem with that. You seem like a man who can take care of himself. But day after tomorrow, I’ve gotta ask you to leave us.”

  “You’re doing the right thing here,” I said, sensing his displeasure at having to ask. “This is the only way you guys are going to survive and thrive. You’re giving these people the one thing everyone else is going to be searching for.”

  “What’s that?”

  “Hope, my friend,” I said, patting him on the back.

  “I appreciate your understanding,” said Wes.

  “I appreciate your help.”

  We turned the corner and walked to the back of the building. Smiling faces and laughter were circling the table as they set down the bounty. I could see why nobody wanted to leave this place. They were self-sufficient, strong, and organized.

  I pulled up a seat and I reflected on the past nine days as they said grace. It was nice being somewhere with people I didn’t have to save – or kill.

  Chapter 20

  (Day 10)

  Paparazzi

  Coughing as soon as I laid down I found that sleep was difficult but not impossible. It had been a while since I felt that safe anywhere. I think my body recognized the opportunity and forced my lungs to behave. Staying another day was a good idea. Looking out my window when I woke up made it a great one. I had never seen a morning sky so red.

  When I threw my legs over the side of the bed, my ribs reminded me to take it easy. As soon as I sat up, the coughing started again. It was less intense than yesterday, lasting only a minute or so before everything settled. So far so good, beating the pneumonia.

  Walking out back to the wash shed, I found Alison sipping coffee on the deck with another ranger. She grabbed her stethoscope and had me take a few breaths. She smiled, letting me know things were going well inside me.

  “A little raspy, but it sounds like they’re clearing out on their own,” said Alison. “I’m not ready to say you’re out of the woods, but you probably will be by tomorrow morning.”

  “I have to admit I’m glad I’m not traveling today,” I said, looking over at the crimson sunrise.

  “It’s why everyone is staying close today,” said Wes, walking onto the deck, joining us. “It’s not like we can turn on the TV or a computer to get the weather report, so we have to pay attention to what we can see, hear, and feel on our own.”

  “You seem to be more in tune with what’s going on than most,” I said. Alison and the other ranger smiled. “I’m sorry, did I say something wrong?”

  “Not at all,” said Alison. “You’re absolutely right. It may have something to do with him being half Creek and half Shawnee.”

  “We all have the ability to see and read the signs,” said Wes, cautious of his heritage outing. “Just because someone is one-fifth or even full blooded doesn’t mean they’re born dialed in to the pulse of Mother Earth and Father Sky. My parents taught me more about respect for nature and less about how I could manipulate it for my needs. They wanted me to learn that lesson on my own.”

  “The signs these days aren’t difficult for anyone to read,” I said. “We should’ve been paying more attention decades ago.”

  “It was never a question of if this was going to happen, but when,” said Wes. “And no one, not even a full-blooded Native American, could’ve predicted how or when. What we’re experiencing now is just a taste of what’s to come.”

  “Wes believes we upset the balance of nature by changing the environment to suit our wants instead of our needs,” said Alison. “He thinks our excess is what’s driving these events.”

  “No offense to anyone’s beliefs or opinions, but I don’t care w
hat’s driving them,” I said. “I’m more concerned with staying alive than answering questions.”

  “That’s the kind of attitude that got us into this mess,” said Alison. “I’m a little surprised you feel that way.”

  “Look up at the sky,” I said. “Is knowledge about why it’s turning red going to save you from the hail, tornadoes, floods, or God knows what else that is coming today? Is knowing why the power went out going to keep you from getting raped or killed? Trying to figure out what happened needs to come later. Surviving so you can figure it out is more important. We’re not in control of anything anymore.”

  “Knowing why will help us prevent it from happening again,” said Alison, glaring at me. “Knowing why will save your life.”

  “You’re not preventing shit today,” I said. “Just like I couldn’t prevent Mary Anne, Katie, and Hope from being raped; Earl and Brian from getting shot; and people being set on fire in the city. Just like I couldn’t prevent the beach full of people from being stoned to death by hail, a tornado draining a lake, or that creek trying to drown me. Just like I couldn’t prevent Sam from…”

  I lowered my head, catching myself going somewhere I didn’t need to go. They had no idea what I was talking about. My anger wasn’t at them; they were just the closest targets.

  “I’m sorry, Alison,” I said, raising my head. “You didn’t deserve that. You guys have been nothing but kind to me.”

  “All that happened since the power died?” asked Alison.

  “Everything but Sam,” I said. “She was killed during the first blackout in Atlanta.”

  “You two were close?”

  “Yes. Very close.”

  “There’s no need to apologize, son,” said Wes. “It’s better to talk about it than suppress it.”

  “She’s the reason why I’m still alive,” I said. “It made me pay attention to the signs.”

  “It made you want to get away from people, didn’t it?” asked Wes. “To get as far away from anyone as possible.”

  “Yes.”

  “What you may not understand is that, out of seven billion people on earth, close to two billion live without power every day. I guarantee you many of them have no idea it’s gone. Their lives haven’t changed a bit since it happened. They’re doing the same things the same way as they did ten days ago.