Alice Again

by Judi Curtin

  I wondered if I should say this to Alice. Maybe I could persuade her to back off for a while. I looked at her, but she had a really cross expression on her face. Probably it wasn’t a good time for this discussion.

  I looked back towards the exit. Just then Norman leaned over and kissed Veronica on the cheek, and they walked off in different directions.

  Alice didn’t speak once on the way home.

  It seemed like a very long walk.

  * * *

  Once again we hung around the apartment for the afternoon because Alice was too upset to go out.

  Veronica didn’t get back until tea-time. In one hand she had two fancy shopping bags. She was using the other hand to drag a cross-looking Jamie into the apartment.

  Alice smiled at her, like she was really glad to see her. ‘Did you have a nice day, Mum?’

  Veronica sighed. ‘It was just lovely until I went to pick up Jamie from crèche, and I heard how bold he’s been. He bit one child and kicked another. And now he’s banned from going anywhere near Justin Timberlake.’

  I had to interrupt. ‘But how could he get near Justin Timberlake?’

  Veronica shook her head impatiently. ‘Easily. They keep him in the corner of the classroom, you know.’

  What on earth was she talking about? Was everyone around here losing it?

  Alice leaned over and whispered. ‘She’s not going mad. Justin Timberlake is the new goldfish. The replacement for Robbie Williams.’

  I started to laugh but stopped quickly when I noticed that both Alice and her mother were giving me really cross looks.

  Veronica continued. ‘Jamie’s on his very last chance in that crèche. The other parents are starting to complain about him. I don’t know what I’m going to do with him, I really don’t.’

  Poor Jamie was probably still suffering from the after-effects of the sweets, and it wasn’t fair to blame him. I decided to change the subject.

  ‘You’ve been shopping Veronica. Did you buy anything nice?’

  She smiled at me. ‘Why, yes, Megan, I did actually. I got two nice new suits. Would you like to see them?’

  ‘Yes, please,’ I said.

  ‘No, thanks,’ said Alice at exactly the same moment.

  Veronica gave her a funny look, then she said, ‘Oh well, maybe later,’ and she went into her bedroom with her bags.

  While she was gone, Alice hissed in my ear. ‘Don’t show any interest. Don’t go encouraging her. If she’s buying fancy clothes for her special dates with Norman, I do not want anything to do with it.’

  Just then Veronica came back out into the living room and sat down.

  Alice put on her false-sweet voice again. ‘Did you do anything else today Mum, besides shopping?’

  I hardly dared to breathe. If Veronica lied, Alice would go ballistic, but she could hardly tell the truth either, could she?

  Veronica was silent for a moment. Then she spoke quickly. ‘Actually I went to the pictures.’

  ‘Who did you go with?’

  I held my breath again. How could Alice be so brave?

  Once more Veronica seemed to think for ages before she answered. Then she said. ‘I went on my own.’

  Alice looked at me, and I looked at her. Of course we both knew her mother was lying.

  Alice’s voice was dangerously quiet. ‘That’s a bit freaky, isn’t it?’

  Veronica gave her a strange look, but didn’t answer.

  Alice spoke again. ‘Going to the pictures on your own – how sad is that?’

  She was taunting her mother, as if she was trying to force her to tell the truth. I didn’t want to breathe, but I had to, I was starting to feel faint.

  Veronica spoke softly. ‘It was a film I really wanted to see. It was an inspirational film, all about a woman who faced terrible tragedy, but then turned her life around.’

  Alice’s voice was cold. ‘What did she do? Did she leave her husband? Did she wreck her family?’

  Veronica didn’t even get cross with Alice. She just kept her voice calm. ‘Don’t talk about things you don’t understand, Alice dear. Now if you’ll excuse me, I think it’s time I got the tea ready.’

  She went into the kitchen and I was left with Alice. For the first time ever, Alice seemed to be lost for words.

  After tea, Jamie went to bed, and Alice, Veronica and I watched reality TV for the evening. In the programme, a big group of crazy people were all living together in a small house. Any time they did anything strange, Alice said, ‘That’s so weird. Who’d really act like that?’

  She didn’t seem to expect an answer, which was just as well. What planet was she living on anyway? Had she no idea exactly how crazy her own life had become? Did she think that what was going on under her own roof was normal?

  I sat squashed into a corner of the couch, and tried not to think too much.

  * * *

  Just before I went to bed, Veronica said that I could phone home. After Mum had gone through her thousand questions about my health and behaviour, we had a nice chat. She told me Rosie had learned to cycle my old bike with stabilisers. I really wished I had been there to see it. Then Dad came on and said he hoped I was having a lovely holiday, and I had to lie and say that everything was perfect, and that Alice and I were having the time of our lives.

  Later on, when Alice was asleep, I cried for a long time. I wished I was at home. I wished I was back in Limerick with my own happy family. Being in Dublin with Alice was just too much hard work.

  Chapter fifteen

  When I woke up the next morning, I lay in bed with my eyes closed. I’d gone along with Alice’s crazy plans so far, and I knew I wouldn’t back out now. It was kind of like when you jump off a huge high diving board, there’s no point changing your mind when you’re half way down, and the water is rushing up to meet you. It was much too late for second thoughts.

  I didn’t even bother to hope that this would be a normal day, and that we would actually get to do all the great things I’d been hoping for. I just lay there and waited to see what crazy stuff Alice had planned for the day.

  After ages, I opened my eyes. Once again Alice was watching me from her bed. ‘Hey, Meg, you’re awake at last.’

  I didn’t answer. I was just too tired.

  Alice sat up. ‘Meg, I want to thank you.’

  ‘For what?’

  ‘For helping me the past few days.’

  I shrugged. ‘I didn’t do much.’

  ‘You’ve been here. And that’s enough. I don’t think I could go through this without you.’

  Now why did that statement make me feel so guilty?

  She continued. ‘Really, you’re being a great friend. And thanks to you, we’re well on the way to getting rid of Nasty Norman.’

  I smiled, but I wasn’t convinced. If this Norman guy really loved Veronica, it wouldn’t be that easy to shake him off. Two missed dates were hardly a catastrophe. And he’d looked happy enough at the pictures the day before.

  As usual, Alice did her mindreading thing.

  ‘We shouldn’t have relaxed yesterday – that was a mistake. But we can make up for that today.’

  I didn’t mention that we’d only had about an hour of relaxation before we saw Veronica and Norman at the cinema.

  Alice continued. ‘Anyway, this is how things stand. Mum has missed two dates this week, and all because of her demanding children. Norman will be a bit fed up already, and today … well today will be the icing on the cake.’

  I got that sick feeling in my stomach that was becoming so familiar. I wanted to know, and yet I didn’t want to know. I tried to keep the panic from my voice. ‘Er, Alice, what exactly is going to happen today? Are you going to get appendicitis again? Please don’t say you’re going to give Jamie more red sweets. I’m not having anything to do with it if you do. And I’m not going anywhere near the cinema after what happened yesterday.’

  She smiled. ‘Don’t worry, it’s none of those things.’

  Whenever
Alice said ‘don’t worry’, I knew it was time to get very worried indeed.

  ‘Don’t worry,’ she repeated. ‘Today, we’re trying something completely different.’

  ‘Which is?’

  ‘Today Norman is going to get to know the O’Rourke children.’

  ‘And?’

  She grinned. ‘Well, it’s too early to give you details. I haven’t got the finer points worked out just yet. But he won’t like what he sees – I can promise you that.’

  * * *

  Alice slipped into action during breakfast. ‘Mum, Jamie looks really tired today,’ she said, ‘Maybe he shouldn’t go to crèche.’

  Veronica sighed. ‘Yes, I know love, you’re right. He does look tired. And after all the trouble he caused yesterday, it probably would be better to keep him at home, but I have to go out. I’ll just send him in for a couple of hours.’

  I looked at Jamie. His eyes filled with tears, which dripped down his cheeks and into his cereal. His bottom lip wobbled, and he used his two chubby fists to rub his eyes. I could see that the poor little pet still hadn’t recovered from eating all those sweets. For the first time ever, I managed to forget all the times he’d kicked me and called me names, and felt really, really sorry for him.

  Alice smiled at her mother. ‘Poor Jamie. He’s wrecked. Why don’t you leave him here? Megan and I will mind him. Won’t we, Meg?’

  I nodded. There wasn’t much else I could do, was there? I was on the roller-coaster and I didn’t know how to get off.

  Veronica didn’t need to be told twice. She jumped up from the table, and kissed Alice’s hair. ‘Darling, that is so, so sweet of you. And you too, Megan. Thank you.’

  I smiled, but I couldn’t meet Veronica’s eyes. If she knew exactly why her son was so tired, she wouldn’t be thanking me, she’d be driving me to the railway station to buy a one way ticket for the next train home.

  ‘I won’t be gone long, I promise you. Just an hour or two. And you’ll be good for the girls, won’t you Jamie, love?’

  Jamie nodded, and wiped away his tears, and Veronica hurried off into her bedroom to get ready for her hot date. Alice grinned at me, and gave me a thumbs-up sign. I smiled weakly back at her. I had a funny feeling that this was going to be the worst day of all.

  Chapter sixteen

  Veronica left the apartment a bit after half past ten, in a big cloud of happiness and expensive perfume. She sailed out the door like a prisoner who was being set free after serving twenty years in jail. I knew how she felt. I wouldn’t have minded a break myself.

  Fifteen minutes later, Alice, Jamie and I left.

  Jamie was on his best behaviour. He held Alice’s hand and skipped along beside her. After a while he gave her a cute little smile. ‘Where are we going, Alice?’

  ‘We’re going for a nice walk.’

  ‘Can I have sweeties again? Some of those nice red sweeties?’

  I looked at Alice in horror. Surely she wasn’t going to make him go loopy again?

  She leaned over and whispered to me. ‘Don’t look so worried. Even I couldn’t do that to him again. I’d be afraid he’d go so crazy that he’d never recover.’

  Then she spoke louder to Jamie. ‘No pet, no sweeties today. But if you’re a good boy, we might find a nice coffee shop, and we can all go in and have some yummy hot chocolate.’

  Jamie gave a little dance of joy. ‘Yay! Yummy hot chocolate! Yay! Yay!’

  Even though I love hot chocolate so much, I couldn’t share in Jamie’s happiness, because all at once Alice’s secret plan had became crystal clear to me.

  A few minutes later, we were strolling along the street where Veronica and Norman’s ‘usual place’ was.

  I had a few seconds to hope that maybe the chef had poisoned lots of people and that the place had been closed down.

  Maybe there had been a fire during the night, and the whole place had been burnt to the ground.

  Maybe there was a robbery going on, and the whole place would be surrounded by police.

  But no. Unfortunately, the coffee shop door was half-open, and the sound of clattering cups and chattering people leaked out towards us.

  Now my only hope was that Veronica and Norman wouldn’t be in there – not a great hope, since they called it their ‘usual place.’

  I had to try one last time, before it was too late. I put my hand on Alice’s shoulder, and stopped her for a second. ‘Alice, are you quite, quite sure you want to do this?’

  She thought for a moment. Then she spoke softly. ‘Actually, now that you mention it, Meg, I don’t want to do it.’

  I breathed a huge sigh of relief, and then she continued, ‘I don’t want to do it at all. But I have to. I just have to. Please help me, Meg. Please.’

  I could think of a hundred reasons to say no. I hesitated for a long time. In the end though, it was the usual choice – help Alice or lose her. So no choice really.

  I shrugged. ‘Come on. Let’s go in and get this over with.’

  Alice flashed me a quick smile of gratitude, and led the way inside.

  Chapter seventeen

  I saw them immediately. Veronica was sitting with her back to us, and Norman was facing us. They were leaning close together, with their heads almost, but not quite touching. He said something, and Veronica shook her head. Her lovely blonde hair slid softly along the back of her pale pink jacket. He said something else, and once more she shook her head. Once more her hair looked like a silky curtain, as it swayed gently from side to side. She looked as if she should be in a shampoo ad. I wished she was, instead of sitting there in front of me, not knowing that something dreadful was about to happen.

  Then Norman reached over and put his hand on Veronica’s arm. He smiled at her. He had lovely bright white teeth. If they got married they could make a fortune – he could star in toothpaste ads while Veronica advertised shampoo. I held my breath, afraid of what was going to happen next. If there was going to be another kiss, I totally did not want to be there to see it.

  Maybe Alice felt the same. She grabbed Jamie by the arm and pulled him forwards. ‘Look, Jamie, I think that’s Mummy over there. Isn’t that a nice surprise? Let’s go over and say hello.’

  Poor Jamie smiled his innocent little five-year-old’s smile, and walked towards his mother. Alice followed him. I lingered by a nearby table and hoped that they’d be so surprised to see each other, that no-one would notice me.

  Norman looked up as they approached, and then looked away again. He looked happy, but only because he didn’t know what was about to happen. Veronica turned her head slightly, and then a look of surprise and horror flitted over her face.

  ‘Alice, Jamie, what on earth are you doing here? Is there something wrong?’

  Alice smiled a smile that was almost as innocent as Jamie’s. ‘Nothing’s wrong. Megan and I just decided to bring Jamie out for a little walk, and he was so good, we said we’d buy him a cup of hot chocolate. So here we are. It’s such a surprise to see you here.’

  Veronica nodded absently. I could see that it was a surprise for her too, and not a pleasant one.

  She looked for a long time at her daughter and son. Maybe she hoped that if she stared at them for long enough, they’d vanish into a puff of smoke. Then she spoke again. ‘Where’s Megan got to?’

  I tried to sort of casually hide behind a pot plant. I sooo did not want to be there. I sooo did not want Veronica to see me.

  Alice turned around. She saw me immediately of course – the pot plant wasn’t all that big. She came towards me with a smile on her face. ‘Silly Megan, what are you doing over here on your own? Come and join us. Look, Mum’s here.’

  I hissed at her. ‘I’m fine here. You don’t need me now. Leave me alone and just get on with whatever crazy stuff you want to do.’

  I was trying to be loyal to Alice, honestly I was, but right then I was so afraid I could hardly think.

  Veronica looked up. ‘Oh there you are, Megan,’ she said. ‘Well you m
ight as well come on over, now that Alice and Jamie are here.’

  As she spoke she clicked her fingers like she was calling a dog. People were starting to give us funny looks. I didn’t move. Now embarrassment was taking over from fear.

  Veronica clicked her fingers again. ‘For goodness sake, child. Come on over, and stop loitering there like a waste of space.’

  I could feel my face go red. I didn’t like her speaking to me like that, but I was too afraid to ignore her. I walked slowly over to the table and stood there with my hands in my pockets.

  Norman had taken his hand from Veronica’s arm, and was watching the scene with a half-smile on his lips. Poor thing. He had no idea what he was in for. Of course, I was with him in that, I had no idea what was going to happen either, but I knew it was not going to be nice.

  There were two empty chairs at the table. Alice pushed Jamie and me into them, and then pulled over a chair from another table, and sat down herself.

  Veronica was looking rather pale and tense. If she hadn’t been so rude to me I might even have felt sorry for her.

  ‘Alice, dear,’ she said. ‘Maybe you should all just run along. I’ll see you at home soon.’ She rummaged in her purse. ‘Here’s some money. Why don’t you stop and rent a DVD on your way home?’

  Alice just smiled some more. ‘That’s very kind of you, Mum, but no thanks. That would be rude, wouldn’t it? – going away when we’ve just got here. And since we’re here, why don’t we stay and have a nice cup of hot chocolate with you.’

  Veronica put on a really cross face, though she was careful not to raise her voice. ‘Didn’t you hear me, Alice? I said–’