by A B Turner
“Don’t stop,” she whispered hoarsely, I slipped my hands up to just above my mouth as if somehow I could force more and more of her between my ravenous lips. Suddenly she grabbed one hand and pushed it between her thighs, my fingers slipped inside her, the intense, moist warmth coated them instantly, with her hand still clamped around my wrist, she pushed harder and harder. I almost fell on her breasts, the need to be tasting her was seemingly insatiable, every part of my mouth luxuriated in being filled with her body, while my free hand slipped round her waist to her arched back.
I felt her begin to slightly writhe next to me, her long nails dug into the flesh of my wrist, almost as my lips embraced her breast once more, she came, her body just rolled with the sheer enjoyment of the moment, before resting next to me. I laid my head just below her breasts, I could hear her heart beating deep inside, I watched a tiny bead of sweat trickle down the side of her ribs and on to the floor. Her hand released mine, allowing me to gently slide it from her body, I felt her fingers play carelessly with my hair, for some ridiculous reason, for a moment, I felt slightly self-conscious as I knew it must feel damp from the sweat. Neither of us spoke, because nothing needed to be said, our bodies had answered any lingering doubts. Reluctantly, after several minutes, I was forced to change position, the muscles in my lower legs had started to bunch and I knew I needed to stretch them out, as I moved, Vanessa also shifted until we were lying side-by-side on the deep carpet.
“Are you alright?” I asked, staring up at the heavily-decorated ceiling, she rolled on to her side, rested her head on her hand and looked down at me, smiling broadly,
“I’m very good, how are you?”
“I’m fine,” I replied, a tiny furrow appeared on her forehead,
“Fine? That just isn’t right,” she said, I turned to look at her, but before I could answer, she spoke again,
“I need to do something about this, don’t you think?”
I smiled knowingly and nodded slowly, she leant over and allowed her mouth to fall on my breast, I felt her tongue flicker across the nipple, within moments, her whole body seemed to be exploring every part of mine. Whenever I tried to move, or offer any kind of resistance, it was ignored, with calm determination she took ownership of me and I gave in willingly to every sensation, believing I could retain some small level of control to stop the oncoming wave of pleasure arriving too soon. But when her slim fingers grazed between my thighs, my mistaken belief began to dissolve and when she entered me, it had gone completely, the combination of her incredible mouth and driving hand was too much and I was quickly swept away on the intense tide. The towering force of emotion was unlike anything I had ever experienced before, seeming to last for hours, although obviously, it could only have been seconds, when it finally passed, I virtually collapsed, my head spinning while my lungs frantically gasped for air. As I lay there panting, Vanessa resumed her position with her head resting on her hand, as our eyes met, there was no hint of triumph in her expression, she just smiled down at me. After several minutes, I could finally breathe enough to speak,
“So I’m guessing you can still feel everything after all,” I smiled weakly, still reeling from the aftershock, she laughed, her head rocked back and she flopped backwards on to the carpet beside me.
“I guess I can,” she replied, after a slight pause, she added a quiet ‘thank you.’
“I think I should be thanking you,” I answered wryly, still struggling to regain some control of my senses, I heard her chuckle,
“You know what I mean, Carrie, thank you,” she repeated.
“Any time,” I replied.
We lay together for a while, before the chiming clock signalled our time together was soon to be over, I reluctantly sat up and began to get dressed, all the while, fighting the urge to ask if we could just move to the bedroom and sleep together, even though I knew this was impossible. Vanessa didn’t move until I sat up on the sofa and started putting my shoes back on, she sighed heavily,
“I hate this part,” she admitted, pulling her jumper back over her head and reaching for her jeans.
“So do I,” I agreed sadly.
Once we were both dressed, we walked arm-in-arm to the door, where we paused, we kissed lightly on the lips before hugging tightly, when we separated, Vanessa pushed a stray wisp of hair out of my eyes,
“Now, take care of yourself, OK? And have fun at that wedding,” she insisted.
“I will, and no more motorbikes until you’re completely recovered,” I replied firmly. Vanessa saluted,
“Anything you say.”
I knew she was joking, but I wanted to make my point, so I took her face in my hands,
“I’m serious, I can’t have anything happening to you, you mean too much.”
She kissed me again,
“I’ll be careful, I promise.”
On hearing this reassurance, I released her and opened the door, not wanting to make this goodbye drag on any longer than necessary, Vanessa clearly felt the same way, as she made no move to stop me. After one last ‘take care’, I walked through the door and down the carpeted hallway, refusing myself the luxury of a backward glance, as I knew from experience, they were always painful. As I reached the elevator, I heard the muffled sounds of someone running, I turned only to find Vanessa at my shoulder,
“What’s wrong ?” I asked, suddenly fearful I had hurt her in some way,
“I didn’t want you to leave without knowing, it’s not just sex with us, Carrie, it’s love.”
The simple directness of her words cut straight through to my heart, I felt tears well in my eyes which I made a vain attempt to ignore,
“ You know I love you too,” I stammered truthfully, she touched my face with her hand, for a second, but on hearing the imminent arrival of the elevator, she half-ran back down the hall and into her room, the door banging shut as the lift opened. The bellboy stepped out smartly as I wandered inside,
“Which floor, Madam?” he asked brightly.
“Ground, please,” I mumbled, swallowing hard, it was only when the doors opened again, I remembered I had not seen Marcella, and so, had no idea, whether or not she had a plan in place for my safe departure from the hotel. I gingerly stepped out of the lift and walked across the marble floor, the lobby was almost deserted and the sound of my heels seemed to echo around the vast room. I glanced though the large windows, hoping the photographers had gone, it was difficult to see at first, the sparkling light from the chandelier dappling across the darkness of the night outside. But after considerable squinting on my part, it seemed there was no one about, apart from the omnipresent uniformed doorman, so despite the risk, I opted to take a chance and I made my way through the huge doors. The chill of the night air hit, like a slap in my face, I dropped my bag and started to quickly fasten my jacket. I was just about to secure the top button, when I felt a clammy hand grip my shoulder,
“Well, look who it is? Fancy meeting you here.”
I didn’t need to turn round, the stale stench of cigarettes and sweat told me the identity of my unwelcome companion, it was the pudgy photographer. As I turned, his beady eyes sparkled through the folds of flabby flesh that made his face,
“Now, no more messing me about, love, who are you? And what are you doing here?”
My mind raced for some kind of explanation, while my body just wanted to turn and run, but neither seemed even remotely possible, I was undeniably trapped, but I had not intention of telling him anything.
“Leave me alone,” I said defiantly, glaring back at him, I felt his grip on me tighten like a vice,
“I’m not going anywhere ‘til you tell me about you and Vanessa, I know something’s going on, alright, so you might as well tell me, I’ll find out sooner or later,” he sneered, clearly annoyed with my lack of co-operation.
“I don’t know what you’re talking about,” I replied firmly, he pulled me towards him with such force, I nearly fell over,
“Don’t mess with me,” he h
issed angrily, his eyes narrowed and I started to feel a small wave of panic, suddenly another man appeared at my side,
“What the fuck is going on here? I thought I told you to go straight home !”
Almost instantly, Pudgy released his hold on me, obviously as shocked as I was by this intervention, I looked round and there was Justin, brow furrowed,
“When I say fuck off home, that’s what I mean, so which part did you not understand?” he barked accusingly, his eyes burning into mine, I was about to speak , when he turned to the startled photographer,
“And what’s your fucking problem? You touch one of my staff again and I’ll call the fucking law, understood?”
“Your staff? She works for you?” ‘Pudgy’ stammered.
“If you can call it that, most of the time she’s fucking day-dreaming !” Justin yelled back, he took my arm firmly,
“Now, get inside and I’ll get some transport to get you home as it seems you only get lost on your own.”
As we started to move, the photographer regained his senses and came after us,
“Hold on, mate, she was in Vanessa Bonart’s car before, I saw her, if she works for you, what was she doing ?” he leered, clearly convinced he had won the day, but he had woefully underestimated Justin, without a pause, he spun round,
“Not that it’s anything to do with you, but we deliver to guests when they’re filming, alright you wanker?”
The photographer seemed to deflate before my eyes, Justin just grunted and forced me back through the doors and into the lobby, he strode across the floor with me struggling to keep up with him. At last, when he had pushed through another door and we were in the hallway, he stopped and released his hold on my arm,
“Thank you,” I gasped.
“No problem, go out the way you came in, I doubt whether Chubby could have made it round this quickly, you should be alright,” he said bluntly. As I started to walk away I heard him call,
“Hold on, I’ll come with you, just in case.”
We walked quickly through the kitchen, now quiet, but for a few staff working quietly in one far corner, as we passed, they acknowledged Justin before returning to their duties. When we reached the outside door, Justin ordered me to wait while he checked the coast was clear, within seconds, he was back,
“Like I thought, he’s nowhere, but you’d better get going, er...”
“Carrie, my name’s Carrie,” I interrupted, “And thank you for helping me, Justin.”
When I said his name, he smiled, transforming his normally-angry face into an almost attractive one,
“No problem, now before you go, out of curiosity, what were you doing in Vanessa Bonart’s car?” he asked, for a split second, I wanted to tell him, after all, he had just saved me, but good sense stopped me and I just shrugged,
“That was a fucking stupid question, sorry,” he said, clearly angry at himself, I touched his arm,
“There’s nothing to be sorry for, I just can’t....” I replied quietly, hoping he understood, he patted my hand and looked at me,
“You’re alright really, aren’t you?”
“So are you,” I added, without thinking, I leant forward and kissed his cheek, before turning away and walking to the door,
“Don’t start spreading that fucking rumour !” he called after me, “It could ruin my fucking career !”
I laughed.
“Your secret’s safe with me !”
I hurried along the darkness of narrow street at the back of the hotel and into the garish streetlights of the main road, which despite the late hour, was still swarming with people and traffic, I quickly hailed a cab and clambered in,
“Where to, love?” the driver asked, I hesitated and glanced at the clock, I quickly calculated if we hurried, I could just catch the last train, having issued my instructions, I settled back in my seat.
With only minutes to spare, we reached the station, having thrust money into his hand, I flew out of the cab and raced across the station, fortunately, the train was still there, so I just had time to jump aboard before the doors locked. I slumped breathlessly on the first available seat, as the train pulled away, I heard my phone ring from somewhere in the bottom of my handbag, without looking, I guessed it would be Marcella.
“Is everything alright?” she asked briskly, “I didn’t see you before you left.”
“I’m on the train now, M....” thankfully pausing at the last moment, when I remembered not to use any names,” Madam.”
“How did you get on?” she said carefully.
“The chef helped,” I replied, “Do you know him?”
“I do, well, that was fortunate, I shall ensure Imelda is informed in the morning.”
“If you would, he..er....saved the whole meal,” I added, now feeling slightly ridiculous at having to only half-say everything, like someone in a bad spy movie.
“Excellent, well, goodbye for now then and well done,” she finished, somehow managing to put some obvious emotion into her few well-chosen words, before I had a chance to respond the phone went dead.
After putting my phone away, I rested back, suddenly feeling exhausted, I closed my eyes and allowed my mind to drift back to being with Vanessa, wondering whether I would meet anyone else who could reach me as she could, there was no hiding place with her and maybe that was what loving someone really meant after all. I became so lost in thought, I nearly missed my stop, thankfully, the train stopped with such a jolt, it forced me back into reality. I wandered home through near-deserted streets, still half-lost in random thoughts, even by the time I reached the front door, I still felt as if I was in some kind of dream. I didn’t bother to turn on any lights, I just drifted into my bedroom, stripped off and slid under the welcoming covers, well aware, if today had been emotional, the next few days promised to be extraordinary.
Chapter 11
I spent most of the following day in some kind of half-life, my body took care of all the normal day-to-day tasks while my mind seemed unable to stay on one topic for more than a few minutes. Being with Vanessa had been as intense as ever, but not in the same way as with Jay, with him, there had been something almost animalistic between us, whereas with her, it was undeniably love, which, I decided was perhaps also a desire, just a different kind. My thoughts flitted to Lainie, I glanced at the clock, it was only mid-morning, I pictured her lying with Damon in bed, probably sharing breakfast and talking about the future. All I had ever really wanted , from the day she was born, was for her to be happy, not to make the same mistakes I had and, it seemed, that particular wish had come true. I was still somewhat lost in thought, when I heard a sharp, but rhythmic series of knocks on the door, I opened it to see Kat clutching several huge bags, she peered through a gap between the two largest,
“Well, don’t offer to help, much better idea to just stand there !” she said sarcastically, I leant casually against the door frame and folded my arms,
“But you’re doing so well, I think I’ll wait to see how long it is before you drop something,” I grinned.
“If you don’t take one in a minute, I’ll be dropping you !” she snapped back, I laughed, eased three of the bags out of her hands and invited her in,
“What have you got in here?” I asked, laying the bags carefully down on my bed. Kat dumped the remaining four on to the floor and quickly surveyed the pile in front of her,
“There’s my overnight bag, for wherever it is we’re staying..” she paused to look at me, in the hope I would tell her the destination, when it became clear that wasn't going to happen, she continued to explain the others contained my dress for the wedding, another had the accessories, the remaining bags were full to bursting with bottles of champagne and chocolates to, as she put it, ‘get us in the party mood.’
I eyed the largest bag with obvious curiosity,
“Can I see it?” I asked, Kat thought for a moment, before sighing heavily,
“Go on then, although why you’re in such a hurry to see yo
ur bright yellow, frilly, dress smothered in bows big enough to fly a helicopter, I don’t know !”
I eased the zipper down carefully, and gently slipped the bag off the shoulders of the hangar inside, when the dress was finally revealed, it was the deepest violet silk, as I held it up, soft folds of material tumbled free until the whole dress was revealed. It was simply beautiful and classic in its design, like something a glamorous 40’s film stars might have worn, I gasped in pure admiration.
“I gather you approve,” Kat smiled, still lost in its sheer elegance, all I could manage was a slight nod.
“Well, now you’ve seen it, put it away my honey, I don’t want anything to happen to it before the day.”
I looked at her pleadingly and asked if I could try it on, but she was adamant, so with great reluctance, I carefully slipped the dress into its bag and zipped it back up securely. Once it was safely stored in the wardrobe, Kat unwrapped the shoes and accessories she had bought to finish the outfit, everything matched perfectly,
“So, do you like everything?” she asked, “I know your heart was probably set on the hideous yellow creation I’d talked about....”
I laughed, I had the violet satin-covered shoes on my lap,
“Everything is just amazing, thank you so much,” I replied gratefully, hugging the shoes tightly to my chest.