by A B Turner
“I think you’d better give those back to me,” she began, “Before you start having some kind of unnatural relationship with them.”
Grudgingly I allowed her to take them and place them carefully back in their box, once everything was put away, we wandered into the living room and sat down.
“So what are you wearing ?” I asked eagerly, Kat shook her head and explained I would have to wait like everyone else for the big moment on the day.
“So when’s Lainie due back?” she asked, “She emailed Matt this morning saying she would call him from the airport, something to do with the time difference which means they’ll arrive here when they left there.”
I glanced up at the clock,
“She said around 4-ish, so not too long,” I replied, “Why do you ask?”
“I want to meet this handsome boyfriend of hers, aren’t you curious?” she asked mischievously, “After all, this is probably the guy who deflowered your baby !”
I grimaced, I had tried not to dwell on the fact my daughter was now sexually-active, seeing my displeasure, Kat giggled and proceeded to make things infinitely worse by speculating what kind of sex life she was now enjoying.
“Who knows? She might be one of those who dress up in leather and whip the poor guy into submission !” she laughed, obviously enjoying my growing discomfort. Fortunately, as she was about to continue, her eyes happened to fall on a photograph of Lainie and I when she was small, this sight was enough – even for Kat - to call a halt to this rich vein of humour.
We settled down to have some lunch, as although we would be having dinner later in the evening, both of us agreed, as the day was going to be pretty much non-stop champagne , it would be wise to eat something now. In the past, we both had experienced the effects of too much alcohol hitting an empty stomach , and were in no great hurry to go there again.
As we ate, Kat chatted about Matt and how much she was looking forward to marrying him, at first, she was light-hearted, but the more we spoke, her tone gradually became more serious,
“You know, Carrie, I really never thought this would happen to me,” she began solemnly, “That a decent, lovely guy would want to marry me.”
I had started to clear away the table, but when I saw the expression on her face, I left them, sat back down next to her and held her hands,
“Why not?” I asked, Kat looked up at me,
“Come on, Carrie, you know me better than anyone, you know what I was like, if anyone was going to end up the drunk woman perched on a stool at the end of the bar, it was going to be me.”
I shook my head and assured her I would never have allowed that to happen,
“And anyway,” I continued, “I’ve already booked that particular stool for myself !”
When I glimpsed only a half-smile cross her lips, I sighed, this was obviously not the time for kidding around,
“Kat,I wish you wouldn't sell yourself short, you’re a wonderful woman, and, like I said to you before, the past is done, over, all you need to think about now is the future, with Matt, and if anyone deserves the happy-ever-after, my dear friend, it is you.”
Kat looked up at me,
“Really?” she asked quietly, “How can you be so sure?”
“Because I know everything, and you should know that by now ,” I replied simply, I waited to see if my words had made sense to her, for a brief moment, her expression stayed the same, but then a broad smile started to spread across her face,
“ It's true,you do know everything and I am wonderful, aren’t I?” she laughed, I nodded my agreement and we hugged tightly.
With the momentary doubt having passed, we returned to chatting about the wedding and Kat tried again to discover what was planned. She was still trying when we suddenly heard a car pull up outside, almost instantly, we both leapt up and raced to the front door. Before I opened it, we agreed we were going to do everything possible to make Damon feel as welcome as possible, without putting him under some kind of microscope, we quickly shook hands to seal our agreement, as we did so, the door swung open to reveal Lainie,
“Hi Mum !” she beamed, before flinging her arms around my neck, “Everything OK?”
Before I had a chance to answer, she had turned her attention to Kat , giving her an equally affectionate greeting,
“Where’s Damon?” I asked, glancing behind her into the empty hallway,
“Oh he’s with Matt, getting the stuff out the car, come on, come and meet him,” she grabbed our hands and excitedly dragged the pair of us down the garden path to the gate. Almost as soon as we arrived, I saw a young man apparently searching the back of Matt’s car,
“Lainie ? How many bags did you have?” he called, there was a slight hint of desperation in his tone, Lainie giggled,
“Leave them for a minute, I want you to meet Mum.”
Instantly Damon abandoned the search and turned to me, he quickly wiped his hands on his jeans , obviously conscious he may have dust on his hands from the car, before reaching for mine,
“Hi, I’m Damon Strauss,"
As I shook his hand, he smiled, there was something both strong and incredibly appealing about his face and I knew I was going to like him,
“Good to meet you, at last, Lainie’s told me so much about you,” he said, before turning slightly towards Kat, he shook her hand warmly before pulling Lainie gently to his side,
“I can see where you get your good looks from now,” he added, before kissing her lightly on the cheek, he put his arm around her shoulder protectively as she nestled into his chest, blushing slightly. Matt appeared from the other side of the car,
“I hate to break this up, but Damon, we have to offload this lot and get on with the party,” he laughed, Damon smiled broadly and returned to the back of the car and tried to make some sense out of the heap of bags strewn across the seat. Lainie sidled next to me,
“So, what do you think?” she whispered, still not quite able to take her eyes off him, before I had a chance to answer, Kat spoke,
“Who cares what your mother thinks ? He is gorgeous, in fact, I might ditch Matt and marry him instead !”
She had barely said the last word, when Matt appeared at her side and dumped two large bags on the ground,
“Thank God for that ! Means I can marry Lainie !” he laughed, when Kat scowled at this statement, he quickly kissed her cheek before insisting she would always be the only one for him, suitably flattered,she quickly forgave him.
After several more attempts at emptying the car, everything was finally unpacked, I made myself busy ferrying the luggage inside as I guessed Lainie would want to say goodbye to Damon without her mother looking on. As I put the last of the bags in her room, it suddenly dawned on me, I was alone, both Kat and Lainie were outside with the men in their lives, and I had no-one. I sat down heavily on the edge of Lainie’s bed, somewhat bemused by the facts, not only had this just occurred to me but how much the realisation bothered me. It was this last revelation I found particularly surprising, after all, hadn’t I been on my own for several years?But, of course, I had not, there may have been no partner in my life, but there had always been Lainie and now, she was, if not gone, certainly on her way.
Thankfully, the noise of the pair of them crashing through the front door snapped me out of my temporary unease and I rushed to meet them, after all, I reasoned, they had not gone yet, so I should make the absolute most of the time we had left together.
We spent the rest of the afternoon preparing for our night out, there was something truly joyous about the three of us, swathed in bathrobes, painting each others nails and taking turns with the hairdryer. Lainie started to tell us about her trip to Paris, I couldn’t help but notice how she almost glowed when she mentioned Damon’s name, suddenly she leapt up from the sofa and raced into her room, only to return seconds later ,carrying two small bags.
“These are for you,” she said proudly, presenting one each to Kat and I, we glanced at each other , before carefully
opening them, inside we found two small bottles of beautifully-wrapped perfume,
“I bought you the same, I hope that’s OK,” Lainie added.
I carefully eased the top of my bottle to smell the contents, Kat did the same, the fragrance was light and yet rich at the same time,
“This is really lovely, Lainie,” Kat said gratefully, before inhaling the heady aroma for a second time.
“She’s right, thank you so much, angel,” I added appreciatively, Lainie smiled, clearly relieved her choice was being so warmly received, she looked at the clock,
“Hadn’t we better get dressed?” she said brightly, “Or are you two going to spend the night sniffing away like a couple of coke addicts ?”
I decided not to dwell on how she knew about taking cocaine, so
after quickly applying a few tiny drops, I returned the fragrance to its box and went to the bedroom to finish getting dressed, Lainie and I in hers, with Kat having mine. It wasn't long before we all reappeared and quickly agreed we all looked completely fabulous. As I checked my reflection, for the first time in ages, I really felt I looked good, my choice had been based on my having watched ‘Breakfast at Tiffany’s’ late one night. Although I had to reluctantly accept I perhaps lacked some of Audrey Hepburn’s beauty, the truth was, there's no going wrong with a little black dress accompanied with suitably glamorous accessories.
So after muttering a quiet ‘thank you’ to the star, I left the mirror for the excitement of the night to come, armed with a case of champagne. For a brief moment, as the three of us waited for the cab to arrive, it suddenly struck me this was the first time Lainie and I had gone out for an ‘adult’evening. Since it had been just the two of us, I'd led almost entirely two separate, distinct lives. First, there was my ‘Mum’ life, which was entirely devoted to her and maintaining our home, secondly, there had been my personal life, and the two ,although running parallel, had never crossed before, not until this evening. Although, for me at least, it did feel slightly weird, in a way, it felt good as well, after all, she was a grown woman, maybe it wouldn’t be a bad thing to let her see me in a different light now.
When the three of us arrived at the restaurant, Kat was obviously completely overwhelmed to see three long tables crammed with cheering friends and workmates. As she made her way through the throng, I gave the champagne to the manager before taking my place at the far end of the centre table, with Lainie following close behind. Kat took her place at the other end, as we had previously arranged, her chair was smothered in ribbons and balloons, making it look like some glorious, inflatable throne. Once seated, she started opening her presents, there were phallus-shaped chocolates, novelty handcuffs and a huge vibrator, which Kat insisted on holding aloft before switching it on. Almost immediately, it leapt into life, sending the feather attached to the top, spinning wildly, as we watched, Lainie leant forward,
“Is that any fun, Mum?” she whispered earnestly, I looked at her, not quite able to hide the fact her question took me by surprise, when she saw this , she grinned,
“Oh Mum, I am old enough now !”
I laughed, before explaining, anything was fun, if you were doing it with the right person,
“Just make sure the feather’s on properly, otherwise you’ll have a trip to the hospital to have someone take it out for you,” I warned, I waited for her reaction,
“Oh right,” she answered, but then the realisation I might be talking from personal experience hit her and she blushed,
“Not quite old enough to hear everything then ?” I joked, she smiled and shook her head,
“Maybe not.”
Once the presents were opened, we all settled down to eat, the staff raced around the tables, it was all loud and good-natured, which eventually attracted the other diners at the restaurant, who were quickly invited to join the party. Throughout the evening, I made a point of catching Kat's eye to check she was having a great evening, every time, she smiled back and raised her glass.
After the meal, the chef presented Kat with a huge cake, which she duly sliced and platefuls were passed down to every guest, as the last piece was done, she stood up and called for silence. Despite the fact everyone had drunk a fair amount of champagne and had become even more raucous, she was able to not only gain their attention but hold it, while she made her speech. At first she thanked everyone for not only sharing the evening but their well-chosen gifts, she paused to wave the vibrator aloft once more, the entire restaurant roared their approval at this gesture. She spoke briefly about how much she was looking forward to seeing them all at the wedding and ended with the sincere hope they could all be as happy as she was right now. We all rose, some more unsteady than others, and lifted our glasses,
“To happiness,” Kat toasted , she looked down the table at me and smiled.
“Happiness,” chorused the group, before slurping down their champagne and collapsing back down again.
As we started on the cake, the manager appeared at my shoulder,
“Your transport has arrived, Carrie,” he whispered urgently, I thanked him and stood up, causing the occupants of all three tables to look towards me.
“It is time for us to leave this place and move on, my people, so gather up your belongings as our chariot awaits !” I said loudly, pointing towards the door.
The giggling, stumbling throng made their way to the front of the restaurant only to see the coach I had hired waiting outside, they roared their appreciation before scrambling aboard, gossiping excitedly, as I watched them, it reminded me of a drunken school trip. Once I was sure the last person was aboard, I returned to the restaurant to thank all the staff and, as previously-arranged, ask the manager to take care of all the presents. He quickly glanced at the heap of sexually-related gifts and immediately passed the responsibility over to two young waitresses, who were quickly giggling hysterically.
I stepped aboard the coach to a chorus of ‘Why are we waiting ?’ and took my place at the front next to Lainie, Kat was on the seat next to ours on the opposite side of the aisle. As the coach began to move, a huge cheer went up, after which, the noise died down, I looked over at Kat, she seemed slightly lost in her own thoughts, so I leant across and asked if she was alright. She nodded and assured me she was just trying to pace herself a little, as she had no idea how long this night would last,
“And I don’t want to pass out too soon, do I?” she laughed.
Around half an hour later, the coach pulled up outside the club and everyone tumbled off and streamed through the doors, until there was just Kat , Lainie and myself outside. Kat looked up at the flashing neon sign,
“I can’t believe you remembered,” she said quietly.
“How could I forget?” I replied.
Lainie looked at me, then Kat, then back at me,
“Well? Are you going to tell me why this place?” she said, clearly exasperated.
“Do you want to tell her or shall I?” Kat asked, I gestured for her to take centre stage, so after rather dramatically clearing her throat, she began to tell the story of how many years ago, the pair of us had decided to go somewhere different for an evening out. After several hours of wandering around, finding ourselves in increasingly-dubious places, we had ended up here, now, as by that point, we had probably drunk enough tequila to buy Mexico, we literally fell through these very doors. I glanced at Lainie while Kat spoke, her eyes seemed to widen with each part of the story, and every so often, she would look at me with sheer disbelief, that I, her mother, had been a part of such a night.
“Anyway,” Kat continued, “We went inside, bought a couple of drinks and looked around the room for a table, just then, this woman appears, fabulous dress, gorgeous legs up to her armpits, with a massive bouffant, it seems she is the hostess and shows us to a table.”
“What happened then?” Lainie asked eagerly.
“We looked round and saw all the staff seemed especially tall, which at first, we put down to all that tequila, it was only when the h
ostess appeared on the stage to announce the cabaret was about to begin, we realised we were two of only a handful of women in the whole place.”
Lainie laughed,
“Did you have a good night?” she asked.
“We had a riot,” I chipped in, “We laughed, we sang, we danced, in fact, I have to say, it was one of the best nights out we ever had “Come on then, let’s get inside,” Lainie insisted, grabbing our arms and pulling us towards the open doors.
Once inside, it was immediately obvious, our group had made themselves at home, to the amusement of the staff, two ladies had leapt up on the stage and were attempting to recreate the duet featuring Madonna and Britney Spears. I quickly found the hostess,
“Shall I get them off the stage?” I asked, somewhat concerned, she smiled and assured me they were fine, as long as they were seated when the cabaret began.
“Anyway, so what brings you all here, to join us for a wondrous evening of glitz and glamour that Hollywood itself can only dream about?"she asked, fluttering her frankly-enormous false eyelashes,
“It’s our friend’s hen weekend,” Lainie chimed in, clearly fascinated by my companion,
“How do you walk in those heels?” she added, pointing down at the towering shoes of the hostess, who beamed in the face of such honest admiration,
“Extremely carefully, darling,” she replied, suddenly she took another , closer look at Lainie and turned to me,
“Are we sure Snow White is old enough to be here? You do have to be 21, you know?”
Lainie glanced at me anxiously, for a split second, I contemplated lying, but quickly thought better of it,
“If she she stays quietly in the background, how about that?” I asked, the hostess frowned,
“Well, I don’t know...I don’t need any trouble.”
Lainie slipped her hand through the hostess’s arm,
“I’ll be as good as gold, you won’t even know I’m here, it’s such a special night..oh go on, let me stay, you know it makes sense, ” she looked up pleadingly, I couldn’t help but smile, she had used that technique on me many times, with varying degrees of success. The hostess looked at her, before sighing heavily,