Seeing White

by Charlotte E Hart

  “That wouldn’t be any different for me, Elizabeth, and although I do know plenty of couples who live very happily that way, I don’t think that’s what I’m trying to achieve here,” he replies cheerily, as if we’re talking about ice cream or something. Jesus, who the hell is he? “I only want you to give yourself to me when the circumstances suggest it’s acceptable and if it’s what I want from you at the time. The rest of the time we’ll attempt normal.”

  “Who will define when the circumstances are acceptable? And do you even know what normal is?” He chuckles, possibly at my interrogation, more than likely at my thumbnail chewing.

  “I will, and I’ll also expect you to comply. Fully. As for normal, no you’re right; I have no idea whatsoever. That will definitely be your department.” Right, so he is a complete control freak. Gorgeous, but weird nonetheless.

  “Do you mind if I think about it?” I ask with a small smile as I consider the implications of what he’s just said to me.

  “How long do you want?” he says, narrowing his eyes and smirking a little.

  “What? Do I have a time limit?” I reply, a little startled by his question.

  He looks at me with a heart stopping frown that disables any defences I had in a second, and slowly inches his way forward like a lion stalking prey. My breathing hitches and my legs turn to jelly instantly. If I wasn’t sitting, I would fall over. Not only is he jaw-droppingly gorgeous, but something about that predator mode has me thinking all sorts of disturbing thoughts, and for some reason, handcuffs suddenly don’t seem so unappealing anymore.

  “Miss Scott, you may take all the time you need, but I want to feel myself inside you very badly and I will get my way. If you decide against something more continuing then that will be your choice, but be under no illusion that I will have you. In several different ways, for varying amounts of time, and you will enjoy every second of it,” he says, clutching me around the neck and pulling me towards his mouth. “You have no idea what I can do to you, for you, or what distances I’m prepared to go to to get what I want. Don’t be so nervous of me that you deny yourself experiences that you’ve never dreamed of.” I’m trembling. I know it’s ridiculous but I can’t stop it. His words, his face. God even his teeth look inviting, which is bizarre.

  “Do you want me inside you Elizabeth? Do you want to try the goods before you decide? Let me show you some of what I can give you.”

  He brushes his lips over mine and I moan in appreciation. His growled response is followed by his tongue slipping into my mouth, pulling my body to his with delicious swirls and those teeth nipping lustfully. His arms increase their pressure and I melt into his kiss. Passion and need explode from the depths of me, and once again I know I’m his for the taking. He slows the kiss and pulls back to look at me. I’m completely breathless as I watch his eyes flicking between mine and my mouth. He slowly stands as if not to spook me and extends his hand.

  “Come here,” he says simply, and I rise immediately as if drawn to the flame in front of me. Not knowing what’s coming next, I look into his eyes to try and answer my own question. He reaches a single finger to my chin and strokes it along my jaw, watching it move, unhurried and cool in his demeanour. “So beautiful. You’re enthralling, Elizabeth. You are quite… indescribable.”

  He certainly knows how to charm a girl. I’m wet with craving, longing for his touch, and as I let my face melt into his firm hand, I stare up at him like a nervy schoolgirl. There are no words for this moment. It’s all him. My mouth is uncooperative to say the least. To be honest, even my brain isn’t functioning and yet my groin is clearly happy dictating my response. I might as well be panting in his face. In fact, I think I might be. “What do you want, Elizabeth? Shall I call Andrews to take you home or will you stay?” he whispers against my ear, moving his lips to my neck and pressing one of his large hands onto the small of my back. The other moves up my stomach, weaving it’s way to between my breasts. “Say you’ll stay with me.”

  He groans, pressing his groin into me. I should leave; that’s what I should do. Run a mile as he said, not put myself in harm’s way and somehow keep control of my craving, because it’s stupid to think of anything more with him. He’s Alexander White, for God’s sake. All of that flies out the window as he lowers his hand and sharply yanks me towards him, his dextrous fingers gripping my backside almost to the point of pain. It’s intoxicating and my thighs clench in anticipation. I have no choice at all in my decision.

  “Yes,” I breathe into his hair, grabbing at it like a woman possessed. All logical resistance has abandoned me.

  “Good answer,” he clips, and with that, I’m scooped up into his arms as he starts striding toward the stairs, leaving me feeling weightless and completely overwhelmed. What the hell am I doing?

  He continues to kiss me as I glide up the stairs, presumably towards his bedroom, and I unconsciously realise that I’ve never been carried before. It’s yet another erotic image that I’m completely overwhelmed by as we enter his room and he gently sits me on the bed. The moment I lift my eyes to his, he starts to remove his shirt, and oh wholly mother of God, the rippling muscles that greet my eyes are extraordinary. The strong hips and natural V make me shudder with excitement and appreciation. For a man past thirty, he’s disturbingly fit. My fingers dig into the comforter on the bed as I try to regain some sort of control of my trembling.

  This is it, isn’t it? I am going to be taken by the sexiest man I have ever met and I can feel how embarrassingly slick with need for him I am as I watch him moving back towards me. His fingers are reaching for me. Oh God. My thighs clench again as I realise I haven’t got a hope at control. I’m completely lost. He leans over me and pulls me back to my feet. I’m glad he did because I can’t feel them at the moment. They appear to have abandoned me as well.

  “I doubt we’ll be needing this for a while,” he says, smiling wickedly as he moves his hand to the zip on my dress. Thank God Belle forced me to buy that underwear.

  Slowly pulling it all the way down, he pushes his hands inside and caresses the skin on my back. I shudder immediately at the sensation. His hands feel so beautiful against my skin, warm, firm and promising untold wishes. Nuzzling his face back into my neck, he drags his teeth along my collarbone and whispers, “You’re perfect - simply fucking perfect. Christ, what shall I give you first, Elizabeth?” I doubt he’s actually asking me that question, more musing his own depraved ideas. Well I might as well know what I’m in for.

  “Alex, don’t hold back. Let me see all of you. I need to know what you want from me,” I say aloud, surprising myself. Have I just given him permission to do whatever he wants to do? God, what have I let myself in for?

  He drags the dress from my shoulders slowly and peels it from me then takes a step back.

  “Turn around,” he says firmly. Suddenly I feel very aware of my body and start to look to the floor in embarrassment. “I told you, Elizabeth, don’t ever look down unless I tell you to. I want to see your eyes all the time. I want to see how much you crave me. Keep yourself focused on me. You have nothing to be self-conscious or embarrassed about. You are stunning and I am in awe of you. You have the control here. Take what you want from me tonight,” he states with a tension I’ve not heard before. Was that nervousness in his voice? From him? Surely not.

  I lift my head to meet his eyes and instantly see the craving he’s talking of. His need for me sears straight to my soul, every straining muscle on show as I feel my insides grow stronger and he moves forward. One more pace and he’s within touching distance so I raise my hands to tentatively feel the skin on his perfectly carved chest. I swear electricity jolts my fingers and I gasp as I look into his eyes again. He licks his lips and raises a brow, grasping my wrists firmly and pushing me back towards the bed.

  “You have no idea how long I’ve waited for that,” he growls, pushing me harder and forcing me onto the soft sheets behind. His body weight is everywhere before I know it, consuming me as each n
erve ending shivers and shudders, igniting every erotic or indecent thought I’ve ever had. “Give me more of it, Elizabeth. Show me more.”

  ~

  Alexander

  He sat in the chair in the dimly lit room with a large glass of cognac and frowned. It was five in the morning and he hadn’t slept. In fact he’d been sitting here for nearly an hour, just watching her sleep. She was here in his bed, sleeping. He’d never allowed a woman in his home, let alone in his bed before. This whole scenario was confusing the hell out of him. His eyes roamed over her body again for the hundredth time as he tried to find a fault. It seemed it just wasn’t there to find, so he gazed over her long legs and tight arse again, licking his lips. His cock twitched. It was frustrating to say the least. He should just wake her up and take her again, but for some reason, watching her sleep was soothing to him.

  She moved quietly and rolled over, which made him notice the dip of her waist curving into her long, elegant back. It was a simple movement but so mouth wateringly enticing that he very nearly went to her but gripped the edge of his chair and refrained instead. He couldn’t even begin to process the way her face captivated his eyes, regardless of the torment he was currently feeling. It was as if she held the secret to happiness or something equally as disconcerting. Maybe she did. Was that even possible? And in any case, that happiness wasn’t destined for him. He simply didn’t warrant any form of love. He knew it and she probably would realise it too.

  She was perfect, lying there like a fucking goddess with that tumbling red hair splayed across her creamy skin. He shook his head at the stupidity of his thoughts. No woman was perfect. There had to be a problem with her somewhere. He just needed time to find it, and in all honesty, he didn’t know if he had it. She had been hesitant to enter his idea of a relationship. Of course she would be. It wasn’t enough for her and he knew it. For the first time in his life, and regardless of how much they had done tonight, he was unsure of whether she’d still be agreeable when she woke.

  She’d taken everything he had given her with complete abandon, and he’d been astonished by how well they’d fitted together. She’d moulded to him like a flower in the rain. Never had he had such a close connection with a woman. Fuck, he really was getting hard again just thinking about her screams in the throes of ecstasy. Her beautiful white skin and those tits that bounced with enthusiasm - a perfect handful each that were real, soft and warm. Nipples that were so reactive to his touch that he just couldn’t stop biting them harder each time she moaned out his name. Christ.

  The pleasure that had radiated through him when he heard her call his name was unheard of. Sure, plenty of women had screamed his name, but she had somehow meant it and he had felt it. Deep down, the sound of her voice had resonated in some way that he couldn’t explain or express to himself. And when he’d finally pushed inside her, after an hour of making himself wait, and felt her warmth around him, he’d struggled for breath in surprise. He’d simply stayed still for some time to just feel her tightness encompassing him. The way she’d penetrated him with her eyes in that moment was indescribable and he’d damn near looked away rather than deal with the assault of her gaze. He could have sworn in those seconds that she knew everything, understood every emotion that he’d ever denied, daring him to keep trying as she grabbed his backside and pushed him further into her. Fuck, he couldn’t get deep enough.

  She was incredible and she’d fucked with a passion he’d never felt before. Her need for him had him yearning to please her in ways he couldn’t honestly remember previously. His goal had never been to give another woman as much satisfaction as he might derive himself. Yes, he wanted them to be happy. Most of the time. Actually, sometimes he didn’t give a shit but it was normally all about what he wanted and that hadn’t been the case tonight. Tonight had not been about what he wanted at all. He hadn’t even used restraints.

  She’d shown she was pliable in more ways than one by allowing him to hold her down or push her to a different position. She didn’t seem frightened when his touch had become stronger or more dominant. She’d actually seemed compliant, looking back on it now, and she definitely liked her throat being handled aggressively, thank fuck. Perhaps she was a little more experienced than he’d previously assumed. She certainly knew what she was doing with regards to his body. She’d held him at the brink too many times to remember, but then he’d given her permission and told her to take what she wanted. That’s exactly what she’d done.

  He had been entirely happy to just be with her and learn about her body. He’d relished every second of searching for what she enjoyed and where she needed him to be. Her nuances and differences were a fucking challenge to be revelled in. Worshiped even. He’d spent long periods of time simply exploring and licking his way around her, and Christ, she had tasted fucking good. So sweet, like nectar sent from the gods as his prize. She’d melted when he swirled his tongue over her and had made her come for the third time - so responsive and hungry for more as each moan of desire had pushed him further towards his own explosion. When she’d pushed him onto his back and indicated that she wanted to ride him, he’d let her. He hadn’t wanted that for a long time. He normally didn’t want anybody above him, yet with her, he’d allowed it, wanting her to stay on top so he could watch.

  He’d been mesmerised as she’d taken his cock inside her and lowered down onto him, moaning with unadulterated pleasure and gasping as his size stretched her wide. He’d just laid back and enjoyed the ride, revelling in every dramatic glide of her skin on his. He couldn’t keep his hands still for long, though, and had grabbed her hips and angled her perfectly to increase the pressure, sending her over the edge again. He’d been so enthralled in just watching her writhing about on him, that he’d exploded viciously inside her while those soft, soul tearing brown eyes pleaded with him for more, something more.

  Eventually she’d snuggled into his chest, exhausted, and before long had drifted into a sleep that seemed restful and undisturbed. Snuggled? When the fuck had that word appeared in his vocabulary? Never before had he snuggled with anyone. In fact, it had only been a handful of times he could ever remember sleeping with anyone, and yet with her, he did and enjoyed doing so. Feeling her warm body moulding to his and her curves relaxing into his muscles, he’d felt something, some sort of relief or comfort.

  He didn’t have a fucking clue what it was but he liked it. He liked it so much he’d remained entwined with her to absorb it into his mind, but then quietly eased himself from the bed frustrated with the thought. He’d pulled on his jeans and walked to the kitchen to get a drink with every intention of doing some work, but he had felt a drawn back to the bedroom.

  And so here he sat, waiting for her to wake and make her decision, whichever one it was. He wasn’t entirely sure it would be the right one for either of them. Fuck this. Alexander White didn’t wait for anybody. What was it that she had that had him so transfixed on her? He felt himself become irritated with his need for her and sighed to himself. He was no good for her and he knew it. Why he was even letting her believe there was a chance of something she deserved was a quandary because Conner was right. He treated women with a derisive tone. They were there simply to fulfil his needs. But she had completely disarmed him tonight. Her willing and compliant body. Her mind exuding a grace he needed desperately for some inexplicable reason. How could he possibly want more with a woman like her? He didn’t merit any attention from someone so open and fragile. He would undoubtedly corrupt and damage her and she would be forever lost because of him.

  Standing, he walked to the bed and pulled the sheets along her body up to her shoulder, watching her breathe peacefully for a few more moments. She was so beautiful, almost angelic, and his resolve shattered instantly as he realised he wasn’t ready to let her go. He needed more time with her. Maybe she could find him somehow - find a way in and calm the storm.

  He stroked a finger over her collarbone and she sighed, mumbling his name in her sleep. He felt his smile sp
read and then the wind left his lungs as he watched her mouth part and her eyelids flutter. He frowned to himself at the feeling, considering whether he might just be losing grip on his control, and turned to headed for the door. Checking the clock on his way, he noted the time and date. His thoughts lingered on the date - another significant day? A good one to remember? He wouldn’t know until later in the morning when she woke, but he made a mental note to call Lisa tomorrow anyway and headed down the stairs with a strange smile on his face. It felt odd to him somehow, as if he’d never done it before, so he chuckled to himself and made his way along the corridor with a new sense of hope, or at least something similar.

  On entering the kitchen, he noticed her phone flashing on the counter top. Who was so intent on reaching her tonight, or this morning at this hour? He swiped the phone to see a barrage of missed calls and texts from her sister. He frowned. Perhaps she was concerned, or something terrible had happened. He grabbed his phone and dialled Belle’s number.

  “Hello,” she answered groggily, as if she was still sleeping. She probably was. Normal people did at this hour.

  “Belle, this is Alexander White,” he said quietly.

  “Tell me she’s with you?” Her voice was suddenly at full strength - fucking brutal actually. It amused him as he wandered over to the coffee machine.

  “Yes, she’s asleep upstairs,” he replied, switching it on and grabbing a glass.

  “Well, could you kick her fucking arse when she wakes up and remind her that some of us might worry about her,” she said harshly. “uh… please?” He got the feeling please wasn’t a word she used very often. She probably wasn’t a morning girl either. That was going to piss Conner off no end.

  His mind drifted to Elizabeth as visions of early morning showers floated through his mind.