by Shan
“You loved the wrong person, bitch! That’s what you did wrong! You loved the wrong damn person!” Honey screamed at her.
“I loved you, Honey! I still love you!” Jahzara said pleadingly.
“Well, bitch, I don’t love you and neither does Tomeka. You treated us like shit, so don’t get mad because we hate you for it now!” Honey yelled. “My girl don’t work in the trap no more,” Honey said disguising her voice in a way that caused me to look at her like she’d really gone mad.
"No, I treated y'all bitches like family, and this is how you do me? I don't give a fuck what Honey tells you. When it came time to bail you out, Meka, this bitch said she wasn't wasting her money on you!"
"Shut up! Shut up! That's all you do is lie! Stop lying!" Honey tried to hit Jahzara again, but I pulled her back.
"No, hoe! You shut up! She didn't wanna bail your ass out because she was fucking your man! She didn't give me a dollar to get you out because she wanted to ensure that you and DeMarcus would not get back together. If you don't believe me, call him. I talked to him before I came here, and he said he was willing to tell you everything if you didn't believe me."
"He didn't say that, you lying bitch!" Honey got away from me and rushed Jahzara. She took out the pistol that was in her pants and slammed it across Jahzara's face so hard that it caused a few of her teeth to fly out of her mouth. The chair fell backwards, and the chair broke into pieces, allowing Jahzara to break free from the restraints that held her down. Honey ran and jumped on top of Jahzara and began raining blows to her face. I grabbed Honey's hair and pulled her off of Jahzara. We ended up tussling, throwing punches, until the both of us backed away from each other. Honey raced over and retrieved her gun from the floor and then pointed it at me.
“Why are you doing this, Honey? What is it that you think you’re going to solve by hurting Jahzara like this?”
“She is a traitor. She sided with them! She was supposed to have my back, but, when it came down to it, she chose Imran’s side! He wanted to hurt me, and she chose him! She’s just like my mommy!” Honey began to cry sounding like she was a little girl all over again.
“I understand that, Honey, but this is not the way to handle this. You can’t—”
“Don’t tell me what I can’t do! She shouldn’t have chosen his side! She’s just like my damn mommy. I messed up when I let my mommy get away, but I’m not letting her get away with it. She’s gotta pay for allowing him to hurt me!”
“He didn’t hurt you, you lying bitch! You made it all up just like you made up all those lies in school! You psychotic ass bitch!” Jahzara yelled.
She was on all fours, trying to climb to her feet. Honey ran over to Jahzara and kicked her in her face, causing her head to snap back in slow motion. I almost thought that she’d broken the girl’s neck until I saw Jahzara steadily trying to climb to her feet. She was fighting and was determined to not let Honey win. I went over to where the two of them were, pushed Honey out of the way, and reached down to help Jahzara up. Since I couldn’t go back and change the things that had led us here, I could do something to try to stop what was going on now. If I allowed this to continue, Honey would definitely kill this girl, and I didn’t want that on my conscience.
POW! POW!
The pain was like nothing I’d ever felt before. My entire body seemed as if someone had lit my blood on fire. I slowly turned around to see Honey pointing the gun at me with that same dead look in her eyes. She looked to be more high than I had felt earlier. My mouth dropped open, and I tried to speak, but nothing came out. I wanted to ask, “Why, Honey? Why are you destroying the love we once shared?”
“Oh, my god. Tomeka, I’m so sorry. I didn’t mean to…you were trying to help her. I’m sorry…te amo mucho! Te amo mucho!”
Honey stepped a few feet closer to me. She reached out for me, but it was too late. My entire body went crashing to the floor.
“Tom…bitch, come here!”
POW! POW!
161
25 Honey
25
Honey
I fired on Jahzara as she tried to get away from me. While I was putting all of my attention into Tomeka and trying to fix the crucial mistake I had made, she ended up getting away from me. That bitch was stronger than I had thought in the beginning, all the blows I’d delivered and she continued to get up like I’d done nothing at all to her. I chased Jahzara out of the front door and fired once again, hoping that I could get her before she got into her car and sped off.
POW! POW!
“Come back here, you lying bitch!” I screamed, running after her at full speed, but I was halted when she turned around and started firing on me. I dove in the grass and covered my head as bullets rained all around me, but thank God none of them hit me. I heard Jahzara’s car door open and close and that was when I knew that it was safe for me to get up. I jumped up from the grass and ran towards her car, firing the remaining bullets that were left inside of my gun. Her window crashed from a bullet hitting it, but she smashed through the street and hit the corner practically on two wheels.
I ran back into the house, slammed the door behind me, and went to where Tomeka’s corpse was painting the carpet red. I shook my head as tears fell from my eyes but knew that I didn’t have time to mourn over her. I had to get her out of here and cover up my crime before the police came creeping like I knew they would. In a neighborhood like this, I knew it wouldn’t be long before they showed up.
I grabbed Tomeka by her arms and dragged her to my back door, which led to the garage. This was becoming so routine, and I knew, after I got rid of Tomeka’s body, that it was best for me to pick up and get the fuck out of dodge. I’d gotten away with the murders of those two guys, but I somehow knew that this wasn’t going to be as easy this time.
Her body felt like a bag of bricks as I put all my strength into getting her out of my home as quickly as possible. I knew that this was not something that I could call and ask DeMarcus for his assistance with since he still had love for Tomeka. I could tell by the way his eyes would drift off whenever I mentioned her name or whenever he came in contact with something that reminded him of her. He would most likely call the fucking laws on me since, according to Jahzara, he was ready to tell all about our love affair. It looked like he was going to do like the rest and turn his back on me as well.
Once I reached the kitchen, I grabbed the keys to my car, pulled open the door that led to the garage, and picked Tomeka’s arms back up, continuing to drag her. Once I made it into the garage, I popped the trunk open and shook my head, knowing that this was going to be one hell of a struggle trying to get her inside of here. I knelt down, put both of my arms underneath hers, and lifted with all of my might. The first time and second time I tried, I couldn’t lift her, but, the last time, I was able to get half of her body inside and had to push and push in order to get her all the way in. I looked at her one last time, blew her a kiss, and closed the trunk. I took a couple of deep breaths, and then ran back inside of the house.
I went straight to the kitchen cabinet and retrieved a big bottle of bleach. I poured bleach all over the floor where I’d dragged Tomeka’s body and began to follow the trail that led back into the living room. It was just too much to clean up, too much to conquer in such a short amount of time. So, fuck it! I thought.
I dropped the bottle of bleach to the floor and took off running to my bedroom, then into my closet. I grabbed a small duffle bag and tossed an outfit to change into once I got rid of the body. I grabbed the shoe boxes that contained some stash money and tossed them into the bag as well. I then pulled away a couple of blankets that hid the safe that had been stolen from Jahzara’s house. She was right. I did rob her, and it was only because I knew that she wasn’t doing a fifty-fifty split when it came to the amount of money that was made from the bricks we were selling. Jahzara was so predictable. She used the same password for everything— her debit cards, her lock code, voicemail for her phone, and for her fuckin’
safe. She never switched it up, which made it so easy for me to take it and get into it with no problems. I put her birthday in 04-10, opened it, and pulled out the stacks of cash that were sitting inside. I quickly tossed the money inside of the bag, zipped it closed, and then headed back to the garage.
I didn’t know where I was going to go, but I knew it was gonna have to be somewhere where I could stretch my money out while living comfortably. I had to go somewhere where no one would even think to look for me. Part of me wanted to go to Mexico and handle the source of my problem, but I knew that the authorities would definitely find reasons to send the bounty hunters after me over there. Wherever I was going, I was gonna make a promise to myself to not get involved with any men. The times I made love to Tomeka were some of the best moments of my life, and I truly regretted that I had shot her.
It was too late to take anything back, but I could always right my wrongs by changing now, right? I mean, I did change for ten years before, so it should be just as easy to do it again. Yeah, I could change my name to something else and start a whole new life.
167
26 Jahzara
26
Jahzara
I pulled into the driveway of a home that I hadn’t been to in years, a home that I should have come to when all of these problems first started happening. The place I should have come when I received the divorce papers in the mail from Quin. Although my father didn’t approve of me leaving the house at just seventeen and choosing to be with a drug dealer, he was a pastor and had always had a forgiving heart. I wished I’d come to him and asked for his advice on what I should do about my marriage, instead of choosing to take those bricks and sell them off in the streets. I was sure he would have led me in the right direction, and maybe, just maybe things wouldn’t have gotten so far off. I was not sure what triggered Honey to start all of this, but I truly wished I would’ve caught on before things had gotten so bad—before she killed Tomeka.
The mere mention of Tomeka’s name made tears fall down my swollen face. I just couldn’t believe that she was no longer with us. She’d gotten so caught up in Honey’s manipulation and didn’t realize it until it was too late.
I reached my parents’ door and began to pound on it as hard as I possibly could. I heard the tires of a car screeching to a halt behind me and desperately began pounding even harder, followed by constantly ringing the doorbell.
“Jahzara!” I heard someone yelling my name but didn’t turn to see who it was in fear that it might Honey, coming to do more damage to me.
“Oh, my god! Mama! Daddy! Open up!”
The door swung open, and there stood my mama, wearing a pink and white bathrobe. I pushed my way into the house, slammed the door behind me, and locked it. “Call the police, Mama!”
“Jahzara! Oh, my god! Sweetheart, what happened to you?” my mama Jasmine cried out. “James! Oh, my god! James! Honey, get down here now!”
I tried to walk past my mama to get to a phone, but she kept grabbing on me, trying to figure out where I’d been hurt at. Every damn part of my body ached, especially the gunshot wound in my arm. Honey had caught me as I was driving off of her block.
“Jahzara? Princess, is that you?” my father asked as he came down the stairs. He rushed over to me and tried to help my mother with me when someone began banging on the front door.
“No! Don’t open it!” I screamed out as my father walked towards the door.
“Is the person that hurt you at this door? I wanna see who the hell did this to you!” my father continued in the direction of the door, blatantly ignoring my warning. He unlocked the door, pulled it open, and was immediately knocked in the face by a powerful punch that sent him flying to the floor.
My eyes bucked wide open at the sight of the person that stood in the doorway. He stepped over my father’s body and came towards my mother and me. He held a pistol by his side and there was a look of pure anger on his face. My mother held me in her arms trembling like a leaf, silently praying in my ear for God to protect us all. Although he looked like he was ready to fight and kill an army of niggas, I knew this man better than anyone. When it came to me, he wouldn’t dare hurt me, no matter the amount of mistakes I may have made.
“Quin?” I questioned surprised to see him here since I wasn’t expecting him to be released for, at least, another couple of months.
“Where the fuck is my shit and the nigga that you gave it to?” he questioned, bringing the gun up and pointing it at my forehead.
“Quin, I didn’t—”
I tried to say but was cut off.
“Right here, nigga!”
My eyes shot towards the direction of the door where Imran stood with a pistol pointed at Quin’s back. Quin immediately swung around in his direction, and the two of them just stood there. Neither of them exchanged words for what seemed like forever. When Quin finally spoke up, the shit that he said stung me and penetrated my heart like only a hundred fiery knives could.
“Muthafuckin’ Imran Jackson. I should’ve known, when they said that somebody was trying to take my spot, that it was you. You always wanted to be me and had to go through my bitch in order to do so. Fuckin’ coward,” Quin said full of animosity.
Hearing Quin speak to Imran as if they had been rivals let me know that Imran had been straight using me all of this time. He had used me to get in the position to take Quin’s spot, and I had so blindly and foolishly picked him to do so. It was crazy how I only went back to Wet Dreams that night to find somebody to help me come up and ended up choosing Imran to be that person, but I wondered if, that same night, he was there to pick me. Hearing this affirmed to me that I’d made the right decision about getting an abortion. He never loved me like he said he did. This had been a game to him, and I had easily gotten caught in the middle.
Imran scoffed, “It’s funny how you still believe that I want to be you. I recall that it was you that followed me around everywhere when we were younger. It was me that taught you everything you know. It was me that broke bread with you when no one else would, but it was you that foolishly got caught with that dope in your car after you tried to put it in mine. Jah, no matter how bad this might sound. I had no idea that Quin was your husband until I came across your divorce papers a couple of months ago. You never mentioned his name around me, ma!”
“Don’t speak to her, muthafucka! You address me. She might have signed them papers, but that’s still my wife,” Quin bellowed.
My heart pounced around in my chest. I looked down at the floor and noticed that my father was coming to after being cold cocked in the face. He swarmed around on the floor and made a few grunting noises before looking around at the men that stood over him with guns. I didn’t know what to do or what to stay at this point or if I should say anything at all. My mind was completely frozen on the fact that Imran knew Quin all along and that the two muthafuckas didn’t like each other. That made the sting from the blow I delivered absolutely worse. I had dropped the connect in the lap of Imran, just like he wanted, and I had practically given up any opportunity that Quin may have had to get back on top.
“She ain’t your wife, nigga. That’s my baby mama. No matter what she did. That’s a fact that will always remain,” Imran vehemently said.
The harsh reality of Imran’s words started a fire in Quin’s brain and sent both me and my mama diving for the floor.
POW! POW! POW!
I pushed away from my mother against her protest and chased after Imran and Quin as they took the gun fight out of my parents’ house. Each of them went in their own direction, leaving me with the decision of choosing which man to go after. I’d just found out that Quin hated Imran with a passion from the way he was talking and that had me feeling more than a little slighted. I looked in both directions before stepping away from my parents’ house and going after Imran. I don’t know why I chose him just then, but I did. Things were about to get even uglier.
“Imran! Imran!” I yelled out.
“Jahzar
a!” Quin yelled after me. Once he saw that I was going for Imran, he began to fire at us, determined to kill us both. Shots hit everything around me as Imran grabbed my hand and pushed me towards his car. I quickly opened the door and climbed inside, jumping over to the passenger seat.
“Imran, come on! Let’s go!” I screamed.
POW! POW! POW!
HATED BY MANY, LOVED BY TWO COMING SOON
GET READY AS QUIN AND IMRAN FIGHT FOR JAHZARA’S HEART THROUGH A STREET WAR THAT IS DETERMINED TO TURN THE SREETS OF DALLAS UPSIDE DOWN.