Not of This World

by Tracy St. John

  Jeannie’s eyes prickled, but she refused to let the tears fall. “I have sisters, but we don’t speak. There is too much pain.”

  “I am sorry, Jeannie. It hurts me to see you so sad.”

  She leaned back to gaze into his face. His compassion simultaneously warmed and shook her.

  “Why? You don’t know me,” she protested.

  He smiled, the caring expression turning his striped face the most beautiful she’d seen it. “I know enough that I wish I could take all the pain away. You do not deserve to be alone. For as long as you are with me, know you are with a friend.”

  He meant it. His kindness was all around her, promising shelter. She gathered the feeling to herself like a warm blanket, snuggling deep within.

  She didn’t have to maintain the ruthless strength she relied on back on Earth, not while she was on Risnar, she decided. Sooner or later, she would figure out how to get home, though Mekay had told her the Risnarish had no idea how to send her there. In the meantime, it couldn’t hurt to enjoy the comfort of Kren’s strong arms while she could. She would be on her own again soon enough.

  * * *

  Kren hated that Jeannie experienced emotional pain. Hated it. But he couldn’t deny that it gave him pleasure to hold her, to lend her strength in a time of need.

  He wanted to wrap himself around her. He wanted to shelter her until the pain eased. Her need struck a harmonious chord with his desire to protect. Not that he could protect her from the past betrayals she’d suffered. But he was strong enough for her to lean on when she needed it.

  That was what he had always wanted from a lover. What he ached for.

  They didn’t speak for a long time. When she shifted, Kren let her go. Jeannie stared up at him with wide eyes as if she missed him already. Hope sprang up in his hearts at the fantasy. Yet she stood and gathered her dishes.

  He followed her to the kitchen. They cleaned up together, Jeannie having noted where he kept things. She stayed close, close enough for him to feel her warmth, to smell her sweetness. To sense her continued emotional fragility.

  It was time to be bold. She may not want him, but she needed him.

  Be honest. You need her too, so bad that it’s starting to hurt.

  He told her, “It’s early yet, but I wouldn’t mind us relaxing in my bed. I think you’re feeling wounded and require some time to process that. I will hold you and listen to anything you wish to say. I’ll answer more questions, if you’d prefer. Or we can be quiet until you feel better.”

  Jeannie hesitated. She had strength of her own. An independence that rivaled that of Risnarish women. But Risnarish women had each other and Spirit, and Jeannie had no one. Even the most powerful person needed another, Kren believed. Even if only for temporary shelter, no one was immune to the basic call of companionship.

  Jeannie needs me, and I will show her I’m here for her. She’ll refuse, but at least she’ll know I tried.

  To his shock and joy, she nodded. “I’d like that,” she said.

  She followed him to the sleeping partition of the dome. Jeannie hesitated for a moment, looking up at him with a shy expression. “You’ll just hold me? Nothing more?”

  He took off his belt and slid into the bed and held the sheets open for her to join him. “We will only hold each other,” he promised. He waited, wondering if she would stay or bolt.

  He was surprised and gratified when she turned her back to him and slid her blouse off. “I don’t want my clothes to get wrinkled,” she muttered in a defensive tone.

  “Jeannie,” he called. “You’re safe with me.”

  She gazed at him over her round shoulder, her eyes wide and wondering. “I am, aren’t I? You won’t hurt me.”

  “Never.”

  She turned her face away again. Her skirt slithered down her hips and thighs. Kren bit off a sigh as his gaze traced down the line of her spine, caressed the gentle indentation of her waist, gloried in the flared curves of her hips. His groin gave a wistful throb.

  Jeannie slipped into bed with him. He gathered her slight body in his arms, drawing her up so they lay skin to skin. At first she was stiff, still cautious. It made Kren wonder about the men of her world. Surely they didn’t push unwanted advances on their females? It was unthinkable, and yet Jeannie’s taut posture forced Kren to speculate.

  He stroked her thick mane of silky hair, petting her. Little by little she relaxed, going more pliant until she at last rested soft and easy against him. The gentle swells of her body fit against his, as if they might melt into one being. Kren smiled to himself, enjoying yet again this beautiful closeness of bed-sharing.

  He floated in contentment. He was so deeply immersed in the pleasure of holding Jeannie that he started when she moved to look in his face.

  She giggled to have surprised him. He laughed with her, glad to see the bright expression. He hoped it was through his efforts that she’d recovered it.

  “I’m curious, Kren,” she said when the spate of humor had passed. “Why haven’t you applied to be the guardian of a child or two? Are you considered too young?”

  He shrugged. “I’ve thought about it in great depth. Being a guardian is a high honor, and I am fond of children. The idea of being a source of strength to another appeals to me, yet raising children and having them move away makes me feel sad. I think I’d prefer a lifelong arrangement. But with Risnarish women, it’s not possible.”

  Jeannie watched him, her eyes luminous. How he wanted to drown in those eyes. She had captivated him, all right.

  She asked, “Was there—is there someone in particular you want to be with? The mother of your children, maybe?”

  “No. They were lovely women—my children have different mothers—but they do not need me in their lives. No Risnarish woman does. It’s how they are.”

  He’d often wished he was like his guardians, attracted to men. It would have made it simple to find someone to share his life with. It was not the way he was created, however.

  “Are you lonely, Kren?”

  “I suppose, but it’s more than that. I want to give. I want to cherish. I want to protect. I want to—to—ah, there are no words.” He gave up trying to explain what he wanted with a woman. “Mostly I am content with my life. After thinking on it a long time, I came to the conclusion child-rearing was not for me. It is not what my spirit cries for.”

  She nodded. “You do not seem to be a man who would make such a decision lightly.”

  “What of you, Jeannie? Are you wishing to raise children?” Not that he could give her any. Kren didn’t have to be a biologist to know that could not happen between them.

  She snuggled in closer, sending a thrill through his body. “I’ve thought about it too. I realized that the only reason I considered having babies was because I felt lonely. Along with shutting up the people who keep insisting I should want children.”

  “Those are not valid reasons to parent.”

  “No, they’re not.” She eyed him. “What do you think of that? Of a woman who feels no need to be a mother?”

  “It has no bearing on me,” Kren said, wondering why it would matter. “If you don’t want children, don’t have them.”

  Her sudden radiant smile made no sense to him. It was enough that she seemed happy with his answer.

  Chapter Ten

  No judgment. Kren accepted it as no big deal that she didn’t want to have children. The lack of concern was refreshing.

  Jeannie wrapped her arm around his waist. She thought she might be safe with Kren, in every way. She pressed her cheek against his chest and closed her eyes, relaxing.

  With sight shut out, she sank into the profound sweetness of their bodies pressed close together. His fingers continued to stroke through her hair, settling her much the way a caring parent might soothe an anxious child.

  Or how a lover would c
omfort his sweetheart.

  When Kren’s lips brushed feather-soft against her forehead, it felt right. Even that whisper in her head saying alien held little meaning for once. Moving without thought, she lifted her face to his, her eyes still closed. His breath wafted over her eyes, her nose, her mouth.

  His lips drifted against hers. The kiss started as a tender exploration of textures. Bit by bit it deepened. They took tentative tastes of each other and found the flavor intoxicating. They kissed with growing intensity, breathing into each other.

  From there, they slipped into touching, discovering the delightful differences each possessed. Their movements pushed the concealing sheets away, exposing Jeannie to Kren’s avid gaze. When he filled his hands with her breasts, Jeannie gasped with enjoyment. Her body arched as pleasure zinged from his touch to her cleft.

  Something hot and solid prodded her thigh. She started and looked down at the thick, striped length that had erupted from Kren’s previously sexless groin.

  He eyed the long appendage with consternation. “Ah. Well. Yes. I wasn’t expecting to lose control.”

  Jeannie stared at the rounded crown pressing at her leg. He was a big boy. A very big boy. How would something that size feel pumping in and out of her?

  A surge of excitement made her insides bubble. Wetness spilled from her sex, and she forced herself to look away. To cover up her confused arousal, she tried for a nonchalant tone. “So when you’re ready to, uh...go, that happens. What happens with Risnarish women? Or are they similar to me in that everything is already set?”

  Despite the obvious erection, Kren kept his voice conversational. “No, the cleft is not there until they are aroused. Nor the breasts, unless they are nursing.”

  “I must have been a rude sight when you found me.”

  “It was a bit shocking.”

  They laughed together. It was only then that Jeannie realized they had continued to stroke each other’s bodies, their hands ceaselessly moving, mapping one another. Kren’s erection remained, but she was not frightened. If he’d intended to rape her, he would have done so already. She had no doubt he could overpower her.

  Another rush of lust cascaded through her body. She had a thing for demanding men, so long as their demands were isolated to the bedroom after she’d invited them to play.

  The idea of Kren taking what he wanted, making her surrender to him, excited Jeannie. Ravished by the alien, she thought. Starring me in my interstellar porn debut.

  It was wrong to feed the deliciously perverse fantasy, but Jeannie couldn’t resist. “Can you make that any size you wish?”

  “This?” He gestured to his still-present, still-poking cock. It grew and thickened before Jeannie’s eyes until she squealed with only half pretended terror. Kren chuckled and reduced it to its previous dimensions.

  “Be careful with that thing, Ramrod,” she said. She sounded breathless.

  After the system translated what it could, ending with the remark it did not know the Risnarish equivalent of “ramrod,” Kren said, “I’ve never been asked for that much.”

  I should hope not. “We have a saying on Earth. ‘It’s not what you’ve got, it’s how you use it.’ Words to live by,” she advised him.

  “There’s a challenge. And one not fair to our younger men.”

  Jeannie glanced away from his member and distracted herself by tracing a fingertip over the musculature of his chest. Alien. The word possessed less and less impact with each passing second. “How do you figure that?”

  “We are taught by the elder women how to pleasure them. Until they take us under their guidance, we have no idea of ‘how to use it,’ as you say.”

  Jeannie mused over that. “You are introduced to sex by older women?” A cougar’s paradise, she thought as she examined Kren’s impressive physique.

  “They are the experts. We must exhibit proficiency before being allowed to breed with women our age. Proving we can please is our first test to becoming donors.”

  She hated how mechanical it all sounded. Was there any pleasure for the men on this planet? “I can only imagine what those first lessons are like.”

  “You don’t have to.” At her surprised look he said, “It starts with touching, as we have been doing tonight. Getting to know a woman and her particular erogenous zones. The first encounter with a potential mate focuses on this ability.”

  “We’re taking the first step toward sex?” Jeannie tried to sound casual, though her heart began to drum faster.

  “It can be a bit more involved than these innocent caresses.”

  Innocent caresses? The man had her simmering with his “innocent caresses.” Curiosity made the words come that surprised her as much as Kren. “Could you show me?”

  He blinked, a slow smile pulling at the corners of his lips. “I’d like to. Will you let me?”

  Jeannie sucked on her lower lip. Of course she wanted to let him. Alien or not, he fascinated her. She had the impression she’d regret it all her life if she didn’t indulge in a little exploration. But should she? That was the big question, wasn’t it?

  “I don’t look too weird to you?” she asked. What if he was only in it for the right to brag to his friends?

  “You’re beautiful,” he said. The truth shone in his eyes. “Do you hesitate because I am strange?”

  “Strange? God, no. You’re amazing,” she blurted before she could come up with a more restrained answer. Her cheeks burned as humiliation flashed over her.

  He grinned. “I thought you didn’t find me attractive at all. I’ve been trying to get you past my appearance.”

  Was he kidding? Hunky Tiger Manimal didn’t realize he was smoking hot? “Yeah, we’re different. But you’re extraordinary, not ugly.”

  “I’m glad to hear that.”

  “I do have a little trouble adjusting to the idea of, uh, cross-species relations. I think it would be too intimidating for most Earthlings.”

  “I am not human. But I am still a man,” Kren pointed out. As if his striped cock’s sudden appearance didn’t tell that tale for him.

  He seemed to take their conversation as permission to move along with the preliminaries. He sat up and looked down at her. Jeannie’s heart fluttered like a butterfly beating its wings within her chest as he moved the covers all the way off her, exposing her from head to toe. As his starburst eyes traveled down from her face, she had the sudden compulsion to cover herself. Her hands twitched in that direction instinctively.

  “No. Don’t hide,” Kren whispered. His big warm hands circled her wrists and stretched her arms up. “Hold on to the frame. Keep your hands there.”

  His voice was soft but an undercurrent of expectation made Jeannie’s fingers curl around the bars. She’d never met anyone who could speak so gently and yet command authority at the same time. Combined with the unwavering way he looked at her, she felt like a fly trapped in a spider’s web, waiting to be eaten up.

  Her insides heated. Was she really going to give up control to an alien? She would, at least for the moment.

  “Good girl,” Kren said as he released her wrists and she kept hold of the rails. She melted into his praise, enjoying the thought she’d pleased him. He wielded control with such care that she felt quite safe.

  He set about touching her, starting with her face. His hand projected extra fingers and thumbs, so that he stroked her brows, cheekbones, the length of her nose, and her lips all at the same time. She shivered at the trill of sensation that ran the length of her spine.

  “Where?” Kren asked.

  “My lower lip,” she whispered. She wondered how she never noticed it was so sensitive before.

  He bent down, letting his mouth brush over hers, concentrating on her lower lip. Sparkles of feeling came from the contact, making Jeannie shiver again. “Lovely,” Kren whispered, and his breath was a kiss against the pout
y flesh.

  He traced the edges of her lip with the tip of his tongue, making her inhale sharply. Yes, she was responsive there. What a curious, exhilarating discovery.

  Kren sat up. His hands next went to the slim column of her throat, investigating her quickened pulse. It was in the delicate cup formed by her collarbone that he discovered another receptive area.

  By the time he reached her breasts, her nipples were hard little points straining for attention. Kren started with the outer portion of the mounds, his hands testing their weight in his palms. He pressed his many fingers into the softness, finding them malleable. He bent down again and rubbed his cheeks against them, sighing with pleasure. With his breath teasing her flesh, Jeannie broke out in goosebumps. He eyed the phenomenon with confusion.

  “Is this normal?” he asked.

  “It means it feels good,” she said, feeling sheepish over her body’s overt response. “Sometimes it can mean a person is cold too, but not in this case.” Indeed, she felt feverish.

  He chuckled. “Your modesty is delightful. I’ve never seen anything quite like it.”

  “It’s embarrassing to be examined so closely,” she retorted. She had the urge to cover herself again.

  “Is it exciting as well?” he asked, his voice going soft once more.

  Jeannie cringed. The shrewd way he gazed at her let her know he already had the answer to that.

  Kren didn’t let her get away with silence. The gentle command that could not be denied returned. “Answer me, Jeannie.”

  “It’s exciting,” she whispered. Damn, he was good with the power she allotted him.

  A half smile pulled at his mouth. “Do you like it when I use authority over you? Your body becomes hotter when I do. You breathe faster.”

  Was that weird to him? Maybe. His descriptions of liaisons with the women of his kind made it sound as if they held the reins. Perhaps Jeannie wasn’t compatible with Kren as far as power sharing went.

  She spoke hesitantly. “I respond to a man’s control in intimate situations. As long as he respects it when I say stop, it’s enjoyable to me.”