Kind of Like Life

by McMullen, Christina

  “Holy crap!” Renee smacked her forehead. “You’re right! I totally forgot that rule.”

  “Luckily, I didn’t.” Blake leaned back, crossed his hands behind his head, and put his feet up on the console in front of him. His messy, slightly too long hair fell roguishly to one side as he graced her with a smug smile.

  Renee stifled a giggle. He definitely had the cocky swagger of a space cowboy down and she couldn’t help but notice that it was a good look for him. She turned quickly back to the control console to hide the automatic blush that her observation invoked and frowned.

  “We’ve got company,” she said tersely, noting a blip on the radar screen that was coming up on them fast. “Can you handle the weapons?”

  “I’m on it,” Blake said and pulled down the scope that controlled the ship’s blasters. “Are you going to be able to outrun them?”

  Renee mimicked Blake’s cocky grin. “Outrun, outmaneuver, and outclass. Hang on to your butt,” she said, pulling the controls in tight. The ship’s nose rocketed sharply and they shot up. As they did, the pursuing ship whizzed under them and Renee turned the tables on the chase. Blake flipped around and blasted the ship into dust.

  They barely had a second to celebrate their victory when a fleet of ships came out of nowhere, flanking them on all sides. Renee couldn’t pull the same maneuver this time, so instead she dipped low, skimming the tops of the cliffs as Blake took aim at their pursuers.

  “There’s too many!” he yelled, spinning the scope in all directions, but unable to get a lock on any one ship.

  “I got this,” Renee said with a wink and a lazy drawl as she yanked the controls to the left, which flipped the craft sideways, and dropped them into the canyon below.

  “What the heck are you doing?” Blake yelled as they passed through a very narrow ravine at high speeds.

  “Losing them!” Renee yelled back, righting the ship so that she could pass under a low archway that loomed ahead of them.

  Several equally tricky maneuvers later, she finally dared to look at the radar. The company’s ships were out of range. She found a wide cavern and landed. A natural overhang provided them with plenty of cover. Renee’s heart was still pumping fast from the adrenaline rush and she had to admit that flying the ship had been even more fun than she would have expected. She looked over at Blake, whose face was ashen and he looked like he was about to lose his lunch.

  “Second rule in the science fiction rulebook,” she said with a wide grin. “Rogues and newbies will always outmaneuver skilled pilots if they take their ship into a tight spot.”

  “Yeah, I knew that,” Blake said as casually as he could muster, but he was still a little breathless. “Doesn’t mean I didn’t almost pee myself about twenty times.”

  “Well change your shorts, because we’ve got work to do,” Renee said as she got up and moved to the back of the ship. The small passenger space held a card table and a couple of chairs. A kitchen console housed the computer that would provide them with whatever they asked for. Beyond that, there was a supply room and a couple of bunks where they could get some rest.

  “What work? I thought we were hiding out until dark?”

  “We are,” she replied, turning around and nearly bumping into Blake, who had followed her. The ship wasn’t very big, she realized as the two of them squeezed past each other. It was an oversight that would make for some awkwardness, but there wasn’t much she could do at that point. At least her subconscious had the foresight to include private bunks. “But we’ve got to make some plans and maybe establish a set of rules.”

  “What kind of rules?”

  “Well, like the rules of science fiction. I know that was kind of a joke, but if we write down everything we know, it might keep us from scrambling to pull something out of our butts every time we’re attacked,” she explained, grabbing a clipboard from the wall. “I don’t know about you, but I don’t want to have to come up with a completely different world every week. If you can survive a month in the old west, we should be able to survive at least as long here. Besides, I… I kind of like it here,” she admitted with a blush. “I may not get to have magical powers, but I get to fly a spaceship. That’s a way better compromise than zombies, in my opinion.”

  “Good thinking,” Blake said, adding with a shy smile, “I kinda like it here too.”

  There was a palpable tension in the air as they stood, too close together, in the small space, each unsure of what the other was thinking. Renee turned away first, determined not to let Blake see the awkwardness that was written on her face in the form of a blush.

  “Okay, what’s first then?” she asked, sliding into one of the chairs and writing “RULES” at the top of the page.

  “First, we need to establish the most important matter for this mission to succeed,” Blake said with a wink.

  “And what would that be?” Renee asked.

  Blake gestured to the kitchen console. “Whether or not this thing knows what a proper cheeseburger is.”

  Chapter 12

  Renee’s idea seemed to be working. She and Blake had spent hours listing out everything that they knew. Not just about science fiction, but about westerns as well. For more than three weeks, their stay on the alien planet had certainly been an adventure, but they hadn’t yet encountered a situation that they couldn’t think their way out of.

  Had she been on her own, Renee was sure she wouldn’t have been able to keep track of the passage of time. The only reason she had any idea what day it was in the real world was because Blake wore a watch. Whether they were on an alien planet or in another time in history, Blake explained that the watch would keep track of real world time. It was an old-fashioned windup watch, but curiously, it never needed winding.

  Renee had asked about the watch, but Blake was tight-lipped on the subject. All he had said was that the watch had been a gift from his grandparents and that it was the only item from the real world that had any value to him. Something about his haunted tone made Renee think there was more to the story, but she didn’t press. She understood, at least, why keeping track of time was important to him. Even though she had spent most of her life escaping into worlds of her own mind’s creation, being forced to do so against her will was terrifying. If it hadn’t been for Blake’s company, Renee would have lost her mind already. Still, even with a companion, it was tough. She missed her parents and her few friends. She even missed going to school and being the weird girl.

  Renee had taken to wearing a watch of her own and she glanced down to check the date. It was February second. She should have been filling out college applications and deciding what she wanted to do with the rest of her life. Instead, she was huddled inside her coat, warming herself by a small fire in a cave on an alien world, waiting for the rescue ship that would deliver the parts needed to fix her broken spacecraft.

  The implications of the situation hung unspoken between them. The ship’s thrusters started giving them trouble two days before. Suspiciously, this happened just after they were spotted by corporate enforcers. Renee had managed to reroute power to the thrusters from the environmental controls, which allowed them to outrun and eventually lose the enemy. But this maneuver came at a cost, which was why they were risking being seen with the fire rather than safely hidden within the confines of the ship. Renee wondered how many more misfortunes they could endure before they were forced to jump from this world.

  She looked over at Blake, who was lying on his back with his eyes closed. He looked so peaceful that Renee didn’t want to disturb him with her own insecurities. She couldn’t help but notice that they had been snappish and short with each other, which was another bad sign. But sitting up all night with her mind racing wasn’t going to do either of them any good, she rationalized at last.

  “You awake?” she asked softly.

  “Yeah,” he replied sleepily.

  “Have you ever tried to escape?”

  Blake shifted to his side and propped himself up on his
elbow. “You mean from in here?” he asked, tapping the side of his head.

  “Yeah.” Renee sighed and hugged her knees closer to her body.

  “I’ve thought about it. Well, more like I fantasized about it,” he admitted. “I… I don’t think it’s possible.”

  “How do you know if you haven’t tried?” Renee asked.

  “Think about it,” said Blake. “They’re keeping us unconscious with drugs. Even if there was some way to magically wake up from that, do you think we’d be in any condition to physically escape? I’ve been lying in that hospital bed for two years and you were in a terrible car wreck.”

  “I know,” she said with a sad sigh. “I just wonder if there’s a way to get a message out to someone, anyone. I… I don’t want to accept that this is it, that we’re...” She cut off with a shudder and turned away so that Blake wouldn’t see how upset she was.

  “I know.” She heard Blake shift and felt his arm fall over her shoulder. “It’s not fair and it’s awful, but you can’t think like that. You have to stay strong or else they win.”

  “That’s just it,” she said with a harsh laugh. “They’ve already won. That’s probably why most of the others only lasted a week. They didn’t refuse to see the truth. They just refused to live in fear of some doctor with a god complex. And for what? Whether we live or die, we’re nothing more than statistical data in some awful experiment.”

  As she spoke, Renee became increasingly hysterical. Blake had no argument because she hadn’t said anything that he hadn’t already thought about many times before. But he also knew from experience that allowing the inevitable fear and negativity to manifest was one of the easiest ways to lose control of their environment. And at the moment, their situation was dire enough as it was.

  “Renee, stop. You’re stronger than this,” he said, giving her a slight shake. “When was the last time you slept?”

  “I don’t even remember,” she said shakily. Blake had explained to her that even though all of this was in her head, sleep was still important. It seemed counterintuitive, considering that the brain stayed active in sleep, yet it left them defenseless. But apparently, sleeping created a barrier that blocked their subconscious from manifesting. “I’m sorry,” she sighed. “It’s just getting hard to ignore the obvious.” She tilted her head toward the broken ship.

  “I know. We both need to sleep. When we wake up, our heads will be a lot clearer and we can begin outlining where to go next and what the rules are. That should give us a huge advantage.”

  “Yeah, you’re probably right.”

  Renee unrolled her sleep pack and moved it as close to the dying fire as was safe. A moment later, she heard Blake crawl back into his own pack. He was right. Sleep would have a beneficial impact on her mental state, but her mind wouldn’t cooperate. As she stared up at the alien sky, her thoughts drifted back to the real world. She wondered if her mother blamed her for the accident, or worse, blamed herself for letting Renee drive. Selfishly, she wondered who, if anyone, attended her funeral. Perhaps the other girls on her softball team did, but then she had to wonder if they did so because they truly missed her or because they were told that they had to attend. She wondered if the mean kids who always picked on her felt bad or if they still said cruel things about her.

  After several minutes of listening to Renee’s sighs, Blake got up and moved his pack next to hers. He hesitated for a moment before reaching over and taking her hand.

  “Stop,” he admonished quietly and squeezed her hand in what he hoped was a reassuring gesture. “You have to turn it off.”

  If she kept dwelling on what they had no control over, they were going to be in trouble. If she wanted to give up, it was her decision. Blake always had the option of returning to his own world and waiting to see who would show up next, but he didn’t want it to come to that. After spending more than a month in her head, it was easy to see that they worked well together and he had grown to like Renee. Her vivid imagination and inventiveness was dead useful, but it was also so much more than that. For the first time since finding himself trapped in his head, Blake felt as if he was doing more than merely surviving. It was selfish, but he didn’t want to start over with someone else, someone who was likely to give up and allow themselves to be killed rather than face the truth.

  “I know,” she said hoarsely, turning her head toward the fire so that Blake couldn’t see how close she was to crying. “I’m sorry.” She slid her hand out of Blake’s and turned completely on her side with her back to him. She knew it was rude and he was just trying to help, but if she was going to have a complete nervous breakdown, she wanted to have it privately.

  Blake sensed her discomfort and pulled back. “We’re a team, Renee,” he reminded her quietly and turned over on his side, pretending he couldn’t hear her muffled sobs.

  Renee awoke to the sight of bright lights on the horizon. The rescue ship had found them and in just a few minutes, they would finally be able to leave the cave and have a proper meal. She hoped that going back to their camp and resuming the fight against the corporation would provide a distraction against the melancholy thoughts that had begun to take hold. As she rolled up her pack, she considered waking Blake, but decided to let him sleep for a little longer, feeling guilty about keeping him awake with her problems the night before.

  When they were outrunning their enemies, it was easy to forget that Blake was just a kid like her. Seeing him sprawled out on top of his pack with his messy hair sticking up everywhere was a painful reminder of the unfair situation that they were in. He should be doing normal teenage boy things, whatever those were. Renee realized that she knew very little about Blake’s personal life. Every attempt to get him to talk about himself was skillfully diverted and she had to admit, she was curious as to why. After all, he knew everything about her, which made his silence on the subject seem a bit selfish.

  Still, she couldn’t blame him for not wanting to talk about his life. Dwelling on her own life had just made her miserable. It had taken quite a long time to fall asleep and even now, she felt physically drained. At least Blake had known when to drop it. She realized, of course, that his life was just as much at stake as hers and he was just trying to help, but she couldn’t just turn off her emotions. Crying herself to sleep might have been foolish, childish, and even dangerous, but it was also cathartic. Emotionally, she was well enough to once again lose herself in their imaginary world.

  Blake awoke a moment later, just as the rescue ship was making its landing. He felt a little guilty when he saw that Renee had already packed all of their gear back into the ship, but in truth, he had gotten even less sleep than she had. He had stayed up until he was sure she was sleeping. Even then, he stayed up a while after that, making sure her sleep was peaceful before attempting to get any rest of his own. At least she seemed to be in better spirits this morning. He rolled up his sleep pack and carried it back to the ship. He was just about to head back out when Renee ran up the ramp and slammed into him.

  “We’ve got trouble,” she gasped.

  Trouble was an understatement. Over Renee’s shoulder, Blake saw that the ship was indeed one of their rescue transports, but rather than resistance members, corporate enforcers swarmed down the ramp by the dozens, blocking the only way out of the cave. They were trapped.

  “Close the hatch,” he told Renee and dove for the co-pilot’s seat. “If we can blast through them then we can claim their ship and try to get back to camp.”

  Renee did as she was told and got into the pilot’s seat to monitor the ship’s status. They had no shields and their power supply was dangerously low. Every shot that Blake fired triggered a flashing red alarm on the console.

  “I’m running out of juice,” Blake muttered. The volley of plasma beams he sent toward the enemy began to sputter. “Try diverting more power to weapons.”

  “There’s no more power to divert,” Renee informed him, trying to keep her voice steady. “We need to go somewhere else.”


  “We’re just going to land in the same situation,” Blake reminded her.

  “Well we just need to get creative,” Renee muttered and shot out of her seat. They had weapons stored in back. If they could find something to use as a shield, there was a possibility that they could shoot their way through the enforcers.

  With one last squeeze of the trigger, Blake got up to help Renee look for a shield. As he entered the back of the ship, he froze. The door was back, which meant that there was a zero percent chance of surviving if they stayed in Renee’s head. But it also meant they had a way of escaping, even if it did come at a high price. For a moment, Blake considered testing the odds. After all, Renee’s ingenuity had gotten them out of seemingly impossible situations before.

  “Is that the…”

  Renee had come back from the bunkroom, dragging the metal frame from one of the cots. When she saw the door, she dropped it.

  “Yeah,” Blake said, shaking off his stupor as he held out his hand. “Come on.”

  He didn’t even know why he had considered trying to beat the odds. He knew he would never endanger Renee like that. Though as he took her hand and stepped through the portal, he couldn’t help but think that what he was about to put her through was far worse.

  Chapter 13

  They tumbled through the door, landing on dry, cracked earth that felt like it was on fire. When the dust cleared and Renee got her first look at the world in Blake’s mind, she momentarily wondered if something had gone wrong and they were still on the alien planet in her head. It took her a moment to realize that they were in Colorado during the gold rush. She stood up and dusted herself off, but as soon as she did, she realized that standing was a bad idea. The air suddenly rippled and she felt as if she was being squeezed by a tight vice. Seconds later, images, thoughts, and memories bombarded her mind.