by Tara Brown
She looks at me hard, but I shake my head, "We give up, we walk away, and we say screw this. I don’t wanna be some flashy crow, and I don’t wanna have the responsibility of the whole of what's left on my shoulders."
She searches my face and nods, putting her pinky finger out like Meg always did. I wrap mine around it and shake them, "We go home and make a new life, and say forget the rest of them."
She doesn’t whisper or try to say anything. She isn’t a coward. She doesn’t take that path ever; it will be her first time.
I nod, "I'm done losing people."
We sit on the odd couch that feels too stiff, like no one ever sat on it, and watch the sky get dark again, like it has for the three nights we've been here. All I can do is pray that Jake, Star, and Jack's son, who I still have not formally met, are taking care of Leo and Sarah. I need that to be the case. I feel spread so thin that there isn’t room for me to worry about them too.
The door opens; it makes us both lift a revolver to the person walking in.
Bernie's eyes are red and tired. He nods, "He made it."
I sigh and hug Anna. My eyes are closed, forcing tears back into them. Anna sighs over and over into my hair.
I turn to face him, "What happened?" We hadn’t seen Bernie since the first day we arrived. He brought us food and left again.
He grabs a sandwich and sits down on the other uncomfortable chair, "Infection of the lung, pneumonia, so they had to drain it. He's been pumped full of every kind of antibiotic and other stuff. They have amazing technologies here; it's the only thing that saved him." He sighs, "They have him in a drug-induced coma and on a respirator."
Anna frowns, "What does that mean?"
Bernie shakes his head, "He won't be leaving here for some time."
Something about his face, and the way he says it, makes me feel weird. I don’t say anything, I wait for him to continue; I know he's going to.
He swallows his sandwich and leans over, taking Anna's water. He rubs his eyes, looking lost, "They know he's a rebel. The doctors from the breeder farm he was once in remembered him. They were there; they recognized him."
My throat feels swollen and dry.
He looks at me, "I told them I knew nothing of it and left him there in their custody."
I'm frozen but Anna jumps up, her whisper screams are savage. She sounds like the infected have surrounded us. Her raw, high-pitch wheeze looses the words and neither of us knows what she is saying.
She leaps at Bernie, slapping and wheezing. He wraps himself around her, cradling her. He whispers back, trying to soothe her. She has finally snapped.
I am still frozen, taking it all in, but there is a question I don’t understand, "Why are they keeping him alive, if they know what he is?" It comes out as a whisper, hollow and detached.
Bernie's eyes lift from Anna. He licks his lips and closes his eyes, "They know who you are to him. Marshall made a deal to trade you and Will in for a pass to the city. He wanted in, not just because life was easier here, but also because he had plans to sabotage the breeder program from within. He knew the best way to kill the snake, was to cut the head off. Marshall made the deal for you and Will. He convinced them Will was the leader of the rebellion and the instigator of the attacks on the breeder farms. He told them he was Will's captive and the way Will originally escaped the breeder farm."
It just keeps getting worse.The pile is so big I don’t have a solution for the things that are going wrong.
I get up and start pacing again.
"Do they know I'm here?"
He shakes his head, "They don’t know what you look like. They assume like your father, but you don’t, actually. You look like her."
My head snaps around, "You've seen her?"
He nods, "Yeah. Her picture is in the files—hers and Star's mom’s, and the other first ones."
I can't get my breath. It's getting caught in my throat.
Anna is running her hands over her face and shaking her head.
I put my hands up, "I need air, Bernie. I need air. I can't breathe in here. I need some air." I'm about to panic. I can feel it. It's like the dead bodies in the bags are lying on top of me again. I can't get past them.
Bernie takes my hand and Anna's in his and pulls us out the front door. He drags us to the door with the stairs on it and pulls us inside of it. We walk up the stairs until we reach a door at the top. He opens it and holds it open. Warm air rushes me as I step out onto the roof of the building. I walk to the edge and breathe, like it's the first time in years, or ever.
The wind feels like it's coming from every direction. I can't help but close eyes and put my hands out, and let it overwhelm me.
Plans and ideas are forming fast in my head, moving like a chain over a gear. I push them away; fight or flight isn’t going to save me this time. I need to be smarter than my father.
I glance at Bernie, "What was Marshall's plan and how do you know it?"
He gives me a confused look, "I was told Marshall's version he fed them, and I figured the rest out on my own. Marshall and Will escaped the breeder farm with a doctor named Herbert Langdon. Langdon died in the escape, but told Marshall that his brother Clyde worked in the city, for the planners. Will told me this years ago. We never thought much about it, not thinking we were going to destroy the city, or maybe just kill your dad. Long and short of it, I went to see Clyde. Marshall had him give him plans and weak points and a few other things. He said Marshall had a place in the city. Between Clyde and the doctor's stories, I have pieced it together."
I process it and look out at the night settling in over the city, "Did you tell Clyde, Marshall was dead?"
He scoffs, "No. That would be dumb. I told him we were here to put Marshall's plan into action. He told me to wait two days; that’s what he needed to evacuate the people on our side from the city."
I glance at him, "He plans on destroying the city?"
He nods.
Anna whispers, "Then the bombs must be here already."
Bernie nods again, "Yup. He must have everything here and be ready to roll. I assume it's all in his place. We just need to find where he lived."
I shake my head, "Impossible. This place is massive."
"I know, but I have an in; I wrote the program to keep track of residents. It keeps track of health checkups and incidents. Everyone has a residence listed."
It almost feels hopeful, but then I remember Will, "How do we get Will out of here?"
He sighs, "That’s the hitch. They expect you to come for him. They expect you to break into the city. They said the guards have been upped on the gates and the perimeters, and people in the streets are being checked."
Anna gives me a look, "Do they think we are with Will, since we came in with him?"
He shakes his head, "Our only saving grace is that I came in twice, for whatever reason, only my second entrance was recorded. The guard who let the four of us in, didn’t record us. He only recorded when I came in alone two days ago, after I went and took Star and everyone home."
It seems too perfect. It feels like it breaks one of my rules. I shake my head, "We need to get out of here. It's too convenient. We need to go. Me and Anna will stay up here. You go find the address for Marshall's and then we all leave."
He shakes his head, "I can get it in the apartment. I have a computer that is linked, I work from home a lot."
He walks to the door, but I have the feeling in my guts that I have learned to trust, "Wait."
He looks back, "What?" He's getting annoyed.
I point, not really at him, but not away from him either, "If you brought Will in twice now, saved Anna once, and brought me in a few times, then you're linked to us. I bet you are being watched. Why would they trust you?"
His eyes look scary for the first time ever. He bites his lip, "Trust me, they just do."
I shake my head, "I want answers. This is too easy."
Anna looks confused.
He looks at her and then d
own, "This place wouldn’t be possible without me. I knew exactly what they had planned from the start. I was young and stupid, and the idea made sense. I helped them make this place. The scientific proof was there. The UN was right, we were making the world sick. We were the problem. I was nineteen and it all made sense. The first paper I ever wrote in university was based on the UN's belief that the five-percent plan was the only way to save the world. Only I didn’t stop there, I went on to help plan exactly how it would be implemented, ensuring only the best of the best survived to help weed out the imperfections. I was fourteen at the time. I went to university early."
I take a step back from him, "Bernie." Anna looks like she might get sick.
He nods, "I'm not proud. They recruited me when I was turning nineteen. I had a double doctorate. I didn’t know that some of my teachers were members of the special committee formed by the UN to plan this out." He sighs, "I saw the Georgia Guidestones as a kid. I saw them and I believed that they were correct. The science was there. So when they explained what was about to happen, I believed."
I give Anna a look and then him, "What's a guidestone?"
She shakes her head, but he gets a gleam in his eye.
"In the seventies, a man using an alias commissioned a monument in Elbert County, Georgia. The monument was made of granite and stood almost twenty feet high. It's got an inscription on it that’s translated into eight modern languages and four ancient ones. The inscription is ten principles or guides to a successful future."
I sit down on the ledge of the roof, "This is about to get creepy, isn’t it?"
He nods, "It is. Rule one, maintain humanity under 500,000,000 in perpetual balance with nature. Rule two, guide reproduction wisely—improving fitness and diversity. Rule three, unite humanity with a living new language. Rule four, rule passion—faith—tradition—and all things with tempered reason. Rule five, protect people and nations with fair laws and just courts. Rule six, let all nations rule internally resolving external disputes in a world court. Rule seven, avoid petty laws and useless officials. Rule eight, balance personal rights with social duties. Rule nine, prize truth—beauty—love—seeking harmony with the infinite. Rule ten, be not a cancer on the earth—leave room for nature—leave room for nature."
Anna whispers, "You repeated the last part."
He nods, "Yup. That’s exactly as it's stated on the guidestones. So the plan was implemented, all nations would adhere to this but keep their countries pure to whatever they were initially. Blacks were sent to Africa, South Americans to South America, Chinese to China, and so forth."
I point at his face, "There were Americans and Canadians who were born here and white people who were born in Europe, how did you sort that out?"
He shakes his head, "We didn’t—are you kidding? We lost total control. The infection was based on something that could be cured and prevented in the right people, genetically-superior people. It didn't work. It mutated. We had to build the city, try to keep the people we were breeding alive, and Michael was slowly getting crazier and crazier."
I wave my hand, "I don’t want to know. I change my mind; I don’t want to know."
He sighs and gives Anna a defeated look, "I'm sorry. You now that’s not how I think now, right?"
She shrugs and looks down. I can see the fury on her and she's unstable enough to act out on it. I point to the door, "Let's go find Marshall's plan and end this shit."
He looks sickened, but not nearly as much as we are. I knew how it worked, essentially, but not to this degree. One language and prizing beauty with truth and love, that’s crazy. Beauty is nothing, compared to truth and love.
I walk down the stairs, unsure of Bernie's true feelings. I know Anna feels the same way I do. I can tell by the way she's walking close to me and glancing back. He leads us to the door to his place.
"Just give me a second." He goes in first, alone, and comes back minutes later, "I know where Marshall's is."
We leave the apartment doorway, and walk to the door to the garage. I hate the garage; it's still as dark as night in there. I can't see a thing. Anna stays close to me, "This place is creepy," she whispers.
I nod, not that she can see it, "Yup."
Bernie's hand reaches for mine, as we get further into the darkness, "It's this way," he whispers.
I don’t know how he can tell, it's so black everywhere. Suddenly, light floods the area as he opens a door. It's a stairwell. He steps in and the lights shift. It's those annoying lights that only turn on when you walk under them. I point upward as they shift with our steps, "These were a stupid idea."
He snorts but continues down the flights of stairs. When we reach the bottom, he grabs Anna and does the first bold thing I have ever seen. He plants his lips on hers, muttering into the kiss, "I don’t care about any of this. I love you, and if you can't love me anymore, just kill me."
In the flickering light, I see they are the same. They don’t take the coward’s path, like I do. She shakes her head, whispering into him. His lips turn up and I can't stop staring at them both. My heart is so broken, I know I'll never live through this. My stomach hurts all the time but this makes it worse.
I know in the flickering light that I would pick him, every time it would be him. Even if he dies, it will still be him. I open the door and walk past them.
I need the fur in my fingertips, and the mean stares from the man I love, to make all of this go away. Hell, even that little, saucy blonde is part of the things I need.
What I have though, is a mute psycho and a slightly-crazy genius and no plan whatsoever.
Bernie mutters to me as he walks past me, "Follow me."
Anna catches up to me, looking slightly more blushed and peaceful. She glances at me sideways but doesn't say anything. I don’t care. I trust Bernie; even if I don’t want to, I do. We walk in peace until I notice she's glancing around. I whisper, "You have to keep your eyes up and look straight ahead—they don’t look around or talk to each other."
She shakes her head, "I don’t like it here."
"Me either."
Bernie stops after a while in front of the only building I think doesn’t look like the others. The doorway is old and arched. It looks like it has character and has been weathered in a different way or time than the rest of the other buildings.
Bernie swipes the door, opening it for us.
"Is this older than the rest of the city?"
He nods as he closes the door, "This is the only thing left of Newport, Washington. Safest place in the USA. Close to fresh water, four seasons, no threat of flood or drought, low population, so we could get them out and take over the town with very little concern to the rest of the world, and natural barriers. The coastal mountains held off a lot of the tidal waves and the Rockies prevent anything from coming from the other side. Not too south so as to be too hot, and not too north, to be too cold. The watershed is replaced every year by the snowfall, and yet, it's dry and warm in the summer for farming. Perfection."
I look around the old foyer of the building, "What's this?"
He grins, "The old court house. We set up here in the beginning while we were taking over the town."
I shake my head, "If only you had put that much effort into saving the world."
He scoffs, "We did try, don’t ever let anyone tell you we didn’t try." I think I've annoyed him. He climbs the stairs to the second floor. We walk down the dark hall in silence. He stops in front of a door but drops to his knees. He gets close to the handle and I hear metal lightly tapping against itself. He opens the door a second later. A smell creeps out into the hallway as the door opens fully. I step back, pulling my gun from the back of my pants. I step softly into the room, smelling and listening but there is nothing. It's silent as whatever is dead in there.
My animal eyes switch on, the room is still. I open the fridge and close it quickly, "It's the old food. He hasn’t been here in a while."
Bernie closes the door, switching on a small light
in the living room. We search the cupboards. I want to take the food but I know that’s not why I'm here. I close the cupboard, leaving behind weeks’ worth of perfectly-good food. That bothers me. We search every room methodically. I find a book called The Da Vinci Code and stuff it into my pocket. Anna grins when she sees it. We meet back in the living room and sit on the couches. I glance at Bernie, "You find anything at all?"
He shakes his head, "No. Marshall was too smart for that, I guess."
That doesn’t make me feel better. We are running low on time. When Will is well enough to wake, he's going to be tortured to find me. That is something I will not allow to happen.