“I hope Rick lays down the law with that kid,” I said for Zander’s ears only.
“Give the kid a break. He could surprise you,” Zander responded. “He kind of reminds me of me at that age.”
“You aren’t helping his cause.”
“You know you adored me.”
That I did.
We watched the young couple exchange the corsage and boutonniere. Boys had it so easy with the whole wrist corsage thing. Poor Lana was so nervous pinning the boutonniere on Max that Momma had to step in and help. Renee captured all the moments with her lens. I couldn’t wait to see the pictures.
Zander and I made our escape as soon as the couple took flight. I had a feeling Rick wanted to be alone with Renee. Momma took Cole and Heath with her. Life was definitely changing.
Zander had a date with an unknown woman and I had my books and Hawaii Five-0. And my thoughts; thoughts that swirled around Jason. I tried my best not to think about him, but he was ever present. I ordered Chinese takeout and thought about our “business dinner” and how perfect that night seemed. I thought about how we had exchanged fortunes and mine said, “Love is closer than you think.” Jason’s had said the same thing. We had laughed about it. I wasn’t laughing anymore.
I settled into my comfy chair with a container of orange beef and my remote control when my phone rang. With annoyance, I grabbed it and stared at the screen. It had Jason’s name on it. I was torn on what to do. There was part of me itching, almost aching, to answer it just so I could hear his voice, but my very rational side reminded me he was unavailable and a client. My rational side won out as usual. I let the call go to voice mail.
I dug in with my chopsticks. I tried my best to ogle the half-naked men on the screen, but the voicemail indicator was like a glaring siren. After I polished off my food, I could no longer ignore it. I played back the message on my speaker phone.
Hey, Kenadie. I wanted to apologize for being an idiot today. I realized too late that I didn’t talk to you. But to make up for my idiocy, I’ll let you take me out to dinner and the movies. I know that’s big of me to let you pay, but that’s the kind of guy I am. Please don’t tell my mom. Or if you really want me to feel better, you will let me take you out and pay for you. I look forward to hearing from you. Bye.
He had me smiling. I could picture him grinning as he spoke. And those eyes. I knew they were lighting up by the way he talked. But … I knew I couldn’t go out with him. We couldn’t be friends. That thought hurt me more than I cared to admit.
I turned back toward my television and hardly paid attention to my make-believe television boyfriend. And believe me, that was saying a lot considering he was shirtless for most of the episode. All I kept thinking was, I bet Jason looks good wet, sans shirt.
I ignored Jason’s calls all weekend. The only people I talked to were Lana and Momma. Both were gushing for different reasons. Lana had the best night ever, and her first kiss. I didn’t even cringe when she told me. It may have helped that before she divulged that piece of information, she told me that Max was a complete gentleman and had even defended her honor in front of Eli, the kid I had wanted Lana to go with originally. I guess I had been wrong. Eli had apparently made a crude comment about my sweet Lana, and Max let him have it. Afterward, he comforted Lana. I hated when I was wrong, but I felt like more and more that was becoming a theme in my life.
Momma called to berate me for missing church—again. And she had to tell me how absolutely adorable Rick and Renee were holding hands at church and giving each other those longing glances. I was happy for Rick.
I, on the other hand, could have been happier. I was confused and not sure what to do with the feelings I was having for Jason. They wouldn’t go away, as hard as I tried to make them.
Monday morning, I went to work with a mission—I was going to fire myself, at least as a relationship manager. That was a nice thought. Someone else had a mission, too. I pulled into the parking lot to find a red Jeep, parked in my spot, no less. You don’t know how badly I wanted to flip a U-turn in the parking lot and get the heck out of there, but it didn’t seem like the mature thing to do. Neither was ignoring his calls, but I’d had a good reason. At least I had thought so.
I parked next to him and slowly got out of my car.
Jason met me at my door. Man, did he look good in his well-fitting jeans, with a button-up shirt and vest.
“So, you are alive,” were the first words out of his mouth.
“Last I checked,” I responded.
He stared thoughtfully at me and my stomach kind of flipped in that wow kind of way.
“What are you doing here?” I asked while he looked on.
He stepped closer and I realized how good he smelled. It was like I was suddenly hyper aware of him.
“Well, other than confirming your living and breathing status, I wanted to tell you that I’ve decided it’s best not to see Liz anymore.”
I tucked my hair behind my ear nervously. He had me on edge. The edge of insanity. “Oh. Why?”
“Like I said, I’m not looking for your service to find me a permanent relationship.”
“I remember,” I said as I walked toward the office in a hurry.
Jason walked beside me. “So, I guess what I’m saying is, I need your expertise again to find me someone else to date.”
My stomach was now churning. Setting him up with someone else was the last thing I wanted or planned to do. I picked up my already hurried pace. “No problem, I’ll have Eva contact you and she will place you back in our rotation.”
Jason gently tugged on my arm and we both came to a stop. We were way too close. I stared up into those eyes, they weren’t lit up, in fact, they looked worried.
“Hey, did I do something to upset you?”
No, he hadn’t, other than crashing into my life and upending it. “No. I’ve decided I need to focus on other aspects of my business, and besides, Eva is the best we have. She’ll do a much better job than me.”
He grinned mischievously. “I don’t want anyone else but you.”
“Sorry,” I said as I walked off.
“Kenadie, you are reneging on our deal.”
“We didn’t make a deal.”
“Sure we did. You said you would be my personal relationship manager and I accepted.”
“I don’t remember it going quite that way.”
“So maybe it didn’t happen exactly like that, but you did agree to fill that position. How can you go back on your word now?”
I pinched the bridge of my nose. I felt a headache coming on, and possibly a huge heartbreak. “Jason, believe me. This is for the best.”
“Sorry, I refuse to believe that. And, quite frankly, I’m disappointed in you,” he teased.
“Join the club.” He and Momma could be co-presidents.
His smile faltered. “Kenadie, you know I didn’t mean that.”
“I know.”
“Do you want to go somewhere, grab some coffee and maybe talk?”
“I can’t, we have meetings this morning.”
“Lunch, then.”
“Jason …”
“Your services include a post-consultation session on what went wrong and tips on how to make the next match more worthwhile,” he reminded me.
“You need to stay off of our website.”
He laughed. “Come on, Kenadie. I need you.”
“Fine, you can call me later to discuss what happened between you and Liz.”
“How about I come by later this afternoon and we can discuss it in your office.”
“You’re not going to let this go, are you?”
“No, ma’am.”
“I think I’m free at four.”
“Perfect, see you then.” He kissed my cheek and walked away quickly.
He really needed to quit doing that. I was tempted to turn and kiss him for real. I hated to admit it, but Momma was right, so, so right. I should have never, ever set Jason up with another woman, no
t to mention two.
I wondered what had happened between him and Liz. My unprofessional, selfish side was happy for the demise of their relationship, but I was surprised by it. On Saturday they looked quite cozy.
I wondered where my mind had gone. Why in the world had I agreed to meet with him and, worse, set him up with someone new? Apparently I was a masochist, or foolish. Probably a good dose of both.
At least Zander was free to go to lunch with me. Although I couldn’t tell him what was going on, I needed his presence.
“Tell me what’s wrong,” Zander demanded over lunch.
“Why do you assume something is wrong?”
He grinned slyly. “Besides the fact that you can’t seem to get those cheese fries in your mouth fast enough, you’ve sighed more times than I can count.”
“Weren’t you a math major?”
“Funny, Kenz. So, tell me what’s wrong.”
“Work stuff, you know.” I kind of, sort of, told the truth.
“Business is booming,” he said in response.
“Yes, and that brings its challenges. Like we need to hire at least two more relationship managers and everyone the employment agency has sent over is a no-go.”
Zander stole a fry and grinned wickedly. “You could always fill in.”
I shook my head vehemently. “Oh, no! That’s another issue that needs to be resolved. I mean to give that up as soon as possible. Jason needs to realize this isn’t my job and, obviously, I’m not very good at it. Did you know he already wants someone new to date?”
Zander’s eyes seemed to dance. “And this bothers you why?”
I sat up straighter. “It doesn’t bother me that he wants to date someone else.” Okay that was a lie, a big, fat juicy one. “I just don’t want be involved in it.” That was true.
“You will have to choose better this time around.”
I could feel my eyes bug out. “You’re as responsible as me for this. You agreed Liz was a good choice.”
“And I was right. Liz adored Jason, judging by the heartbroken message she sent me this morning.”
“Liz contacted you?”
“Yes, I am her relationship manager, after all. She asked that we don’t set her up with anyone in the near future while she deals with her feelings for Jason.”
I dropped the fry I was about to put into my mouth. I felt that horrible feeling of envy bubbling up in me. And I was so torn. It was my job to make sure that we created successful matches and I always felt terrible when one side didn’t feel the same way as the other. I could see why Liz fell for Jason, considering I’d fallen off the proverbial cliff for him.
“I’m sorry to hear that. Has Jason given you any indication why he didn’t connect with her? Obviously she felt a connection and they looked happy together on Saturday.”
Zander took a long slow drink of his Coke, like he was stalling. I eyed him suspiciously the whole time. I could see amusement light up his eyes. He was such a butthead sometimes.
“You know,” he started off, “I think you need to discuss that with Jason.”
I reciprocated with the evil eye. “So, he did discuss this with you?”
Zander reached across the table and grabbed my hand. “Yes, and it was a private conversation.”
I pulled my hand away. “Why are you being so secretive about this? Does Jason have some hidden skeletons in his closet or something?”
“Kenz, Jason is as good of a guy as you will ever meet. You need to follow through and do your job.”
“Yes, Dad.”
Zander chuckled. “This is for your own good, young lady.”
I couldn’t see how that was possible.
Chapter Twenty-One
That afternoon sped by. Why does that happen when you’re dreading something?
I pulled up the post break-up questions and suggestions that Kate, our on staff psychologist, had come up with. Some of them were a little cringe-worthy, like, “Becoming intimate too quickly in a relationship can sometimes sabotage the relationship. Do you feel like this played a part in the demise of your relationship?”
I decided to fly by the seat of my pants instead. Not only could I not ask that question, I couldn’t bear to hear the answer if that were the case. I had thought Jason was trying to keep it on the friendly side, but what if he wanted to be friends with benefits? That would mean he lied on his original survey. He said he wasn’t pursuing that kind of relationship. What if, in the heat of the moment, he changed his mind and …. No, no, no … That was none of my business, and the thought had me feeling violent feelings for Jason and Liz.
I don’t know if I had ever been so jealous in all my life.
Surprise, surprise, Jason was early. It was normally a quality I admired, but today it was not welcome.
“Meg told me to come on back,” he said as a way of announcing himself.
Did she now? He probably charmed her with his smile. I knew I had fallen victim to it.
I closed out of the application I was working on, sat up straighter, and motioned for him to take a seat.
Out came his smile as he closed my office door before taking a seat. “You look lovely today. I forgot to tell you that when I saw you this morning.”
I looked down at my wrap-around cream-colored dress and blushed. I liked the word lovely. And I liked him … too much. “Thank you,” I said in a whisper.
“Kenadie …”
“Yes.” I avoided looking him in the eye. His charming smile had nothing on his eyes.
“Tell me what I’ve done to upset you.”
“I’m not upset with you.”
“Then why have you been avoiding me?”
“I thought you came to talk about what happened between you and Liz?”
“We will, but first things first. I miss my PRM.”
“Jason, as your relationship manager I need to maintain my distance to be able to provide you with unbiased and effective guidance.”
“That sounds like some kind of disclaimer or something.”
“Is there something wrong with that?”
“Well, yeah. How can you possibly help me if you, as you said, maintain your distance?”
“You do realize that I’ve been more involved with you than any other relationship manager typically gets. And I hate to keep saying this, but you aren’t paying for this service.”
His smiled widened. “Didn’t Zander tell you? I paid in full today.”
“No, he didn’t.”
He scooted his chair closer to my desk. “Well, now you know. So no more excuses.”
I sighed deeply and ran my fingers through my hair. “Fine, tell me what you think went wrong with you and Liz.”
“For starters, she always had to be right. And as much as a man enjoys being chased, he would also like the opportunity to pursue the woman.”
“Okay, so you want to date someone not so forward who values your opinion?”
“That’s a start.”
I wrote some notes and thought back to Kate’s questions. “Were you physically attracted to her?” I asked into my notebook. I didn’t really want to know if he was attracted to someone else.
“She was pretty, but …”
I looked up to find him thoughtfully looking at me. Our eyes met and I wanted to get lost in his gaze. Focus, Kenadie.
“ … I can’t say, physically, she held my attention. Does that make me sound like a jerk?”
“No. As humans we can’t help who we are and are not attracted to.” Boy, didn’t I know.
“You always make me feel better, Kenadie.”
“Your survey indicated you liked darker blondes with brown eyes. Is that still your preference?”
“Most definitely,” he replied in this silky tone that made my heart pump a little harder.
Oh, hell. I was in trouble. I sat back some, trying to put some more distance between us. It wasn’t working.
“But don’t worry about those particulars.”
I nodde
d because I felt like if I spoke, he would somehow know how attracted I was to him. I wrote some nonsensical note down. “Is there anything else you would like to add?”
He grinned and I could see the wheels spinning behind those eyes of his. “I want you to remember that I’m not expecting, nor do I want you to set me up with a wife, or even a girlfriend.”
“Then what do you expect?”
He sat back, put his hands behind his head, and thought for a moment. “I think I will keep that one to myself.”
“Between you and Zander, I think I’m a little tired of men today.”
He laughed deeply. “I’m sorry to hear that.” He stood up gracefully. “I have some things I need to tie up at the office, but I’ll call you later. I hope that you’ll answer.”
“I’ll think about it.”
His eyes told me I amused him. “I do like a woman with spirit,” he said as he strode out my door.
I lay my head down on my desk and refrained from banging it repeatedly. I can’t tell you how strong that urge was. It was there, though, that I was struck with masochistic brilliance. I was going to be the best relationship manager ever and help him find the perfect woman. It was going to kill me, but it was my job; and the sooner he found someone, the sooner he would exit my life. The quicker that happened, the better.
I went to work and researched every woman who closely matched his profile. In fact, I took my work home with me. To start with, I compiled a list of five women. Angela and Hope were back in the rotations, per the nature of the “not looking for anything serious” group. That group always had a lot of movement. They had been on my short list last time, and to them I added Jocelyn, Kira, and Chantel. Each was gorgeous, successful, and lived what sounded like a full life. One of them was bound to knock his socks off. I made up a special comparison chart with each woman’s stats and meticulously went over it. It was a tough call, but my first selection was Chantel. She had me the most jealous. I took that as a good sign. She looked like Cindy Crawford, and from her profile, she was a fun-loving saint. Perfect for Jason. I would have to get the approval of my team on Friday, but how could they disagree?
I answered every one of Jason’s calls during the week, and I began to give him advice that went against my normal train of thought, but I figured that was a good thing, being as I hadn’t dated in many years. I recommended flowers, romantic locations, and expensive restaurants. I even looked up show and concert venues and sent him copies of each, so he would have a convenient list on hand.
His Personal Relationship Manager (Dating by Design Book 1) Page 21