Still, he doesn’t say anything. He simply waits for me to take the amulet off and walk back to the cave to put it in my backpack. His face is blank when I come back out. I hold my hand out to him and he takes it without even checking to make sure I really left the amulet in the cave.
Without asking him if he’s ready, I close my eyes and draw from the earth. As the rush of being one with the magic consumes me control doesn’t enter my mind. It’s not until I end up in the snow on my back again that I let it go. Kallen has the dry heaves several feet away from me. Eew.
When I sit up, he realizes that I’m conscious and he stands up. He looks pale but he holds his hand out to me. “Again,” is all he says.
I actually try this time to control it but it’s so hard. I’ve never experienced anything that makes me feel this good. So, of course, I end up on my back in the snow again. And this time, Kallen is too.
Immediately, he stands up and holds out his hand. “Again.” He’s almost as pale as Mom and Dad now and I don’t think it’s a good idea to try again so soon but I doubt he cares about my opinion.
Taking his hand again, I repeat the process but it’s different this time. This time I feel him pushing against my magic, pushing it back into me and he’s right, it burns like hell when his magic starts to push through me, too. I let my magic go and drop to my knees still holding Kallen’s hand as he pulls his magic back.
He pulls me to my feet. “Again,” he says.
I glare at him before closing my eyes and pulling. Before I’m able to bring forth much magic from the earth, his magic is inside of me, burning me and I try to let go of his hand but he won’t let me. “Fight,” I hear him growl.
Fine, if he’s going to be an ass about it. Trying to ignore the pain, I pull. I pull harder than I have any other time. I willingly pull on the earth not to fill myself but to fill both of us. I feel his magic ebb and I keep pushing. I can feel him trying to defend himself as his magic struggles to keep mine from entering him. The point where they meet is like boiling lava and neither of us wants it inside of us. As the pressure builds and the magic has no place to go, it has no choice but to go outwards. I hear a loud explosion and the next thing I know, I’m flying through the air. I feel my head and back hit something hard and then everything goes black.
Chapter 10
“Xandra,” I hear a deep voice say. I like this voice, it’s soothing. “Xandra,” it says again and I want to wrap myself up inside of it. But as I become more conscious I start to feel the pain. My head feels like it’s going to explode. I open my eyes slowly and the sun burns into them forcing me to close them again.
“Go away,” I mumble because now I realize that soothing voice was Kallen’s. I’m not even sure if I said it loud enough for him to hear me but I push at him with my hand to make sure he gets the point.
“Xandra, I need to see how badly you are hurt. You hit a tree when our magic threw us apart.
“Like you care,” I grumble.
“I care very much, now please, open your eyes.”
Wow, he just said please. And it actually sounded like he meant it. Must be my head injury playing tricks on me. “Go away,” I say louder and push at him again with my hand but he doesn’t budge.
“You have to open your eyes. I do not know what healing you will need if you do not let me assess your injuries.”
“You hate me, why would you want to heal me?” My voice is getting stronger as I wake up more but I still don’t want to open my eyes. The sun hurt my head too much.
“You are stubborn and obnoxious and difficult to manage but I do not hate you.”
I crack my eyes a little bit. “With all that sweet talk, you must be a hit with the Fairy women.”
I see relief wash over his face. “Your injuries must not be great if you can still disparage me so.”
Opening my eyes but still squinting against the sun, I try to push myself to a sitting position but as soon as I try to sit up a sharp pain in my back tells me I should lay back down. I hiss in pain as I go back to my original position. Kallen looks concerned again. “I believe you may have a broken rib.”
“Okay, does that mean I can close my eyes again? The sun is really bright.”
Was that almost a smile on his face? “Yes, you may close your eyes. I will be right back.” As soon as he says that, I slam my eyes closed and I don’t care where he’s going or what he’s doing as long as I don’t have to move again any time soon.
Kallen’s back way too quickly for my liking. I feel him kneel down next to me and then he starts pulling up my sweater. My eyes fly open regardless of the brightness of the sun. “What are you doing?”
“I need to put the salve over your wound.” He says that matter-of-factly but I don’t miss the hint of embarrassment in his eyes as he tugs my shirt up almost to my breasts so he must be telling the truth. I try to lift up to make it easier, but that causes more pain and I really don’t need that.
“Lay still,” he tells me as he rubs something wet and sticky on my side. “There is the possibility of the rib puncturing your lung if you move the wrong way.”
That’s enough to make me lay perfectly still. After Kallen gingerly rubs the salve on my skin, he lays his hand over it. I feel heat coming from his hand. Not heat like we were burning each other with earlier. This is a warm, pleasant feeling and my skin begins to tingle under his touch. “That feels good,” I can’t help from saying.
The corners of his mouth lift up into a small smile. “This is what it feels like when you do it right.”
“Oh,” is all I can think of to say to that. I close my eyes again and lay still until he lifts his hand.
“How do you feel?” he asks.
I slowly lift from the ground and surprisingly, there’s almost no pain. I sit up and tug my shirt down to where it’s supposed to be. “It feels good.”
Kallen nods once and stands up. “You should rest. Do you need help getting to the cave?”
The look on his face clearly tells me that he hopes my answer is no. So, that’s what I say. “No, I can manage.” I push myself up off the ground ignoring his outstretched hand and I stand up. I walk slowly back to the cave. The more I move, the more my body tells me how sore it’s going to be for a while. I’m relieved when I finally reach my sleeping bag and I can lie down again. Within minutes, I fall asleep.
The sun is still out when I wake up but it’s much lower in the sky. Night is just around the corner. I look around the gloomy cave but there’s no sign of Kallen. I spend a second wondering what he did all day while I was asleep, but then I realize that I don’t really care. I’m actually relieved he’s gone. Between last night and this morning, it seems that our interactions just keep going down hill faster and faster.
My stomach growls letting me know I’m starved since all I had eaten today was the granola bar. I move to where I had put the food last night and a twinge in my back lets me know I’m still not fully healed. But considering all that a doctor would have done for me was tape it and then tell me that it would be painful for a month, a little twinge of pain doesn’t seem so bad.
I open a can of chicken noodle soup and light the small cook stove. The heat feels good against my hands as I hold them out towards it. The soup only takes a few minutes to heat up and I pour it into a bowl and bring it back to the sleeping bag so I can wrap myself back up at least up to my waist. I really, really hate the cold. Overall, though, I think I’ve been a pretty good sport about it since we started on this demented little journey of ours.
When I’m done with my soup I rinse my spoon and bowl out in the snow making sure the snow is white first. This is, after all, the home to many animals. I put the bowl back with the other dishes and crawl back into my sleeping bag. There is no way I’m going to look for Kallen. I’d be perfectly content not to see him again until tomorrow. Next century would be even better.
I try to read from Mom’s grimoire but my head starts to hurt again so I set it aside and close my eyes. I
plan to just rest for a few minutes but when I open my eyes again, it’s full dark outside. I move to stretch my stiff body and I see small beady eyes staring at me. I shriek and move away from it. It takes me a moment in the dark to realize it’s just Kallen in his raven form. “You scared the crap out of me, you stupid bird.”
Unzipping my sleeping bag and climbing out of it, I start to pull my boots on. The absolute worst part of this trip? It’s not the fighting with Kallen, not the lack of decent food or entertainment, no, it’s the fact that I have to go outside and pee in the snow. The raven cocks its head as it stares at me and I throw a glove at him making him fly to the other side of the cave. It’s bad enough when he stares at me when he’s in his human form, excuse me, his Fairy form, but when he’s a raven it’s just downright spooky. I keep expecting him to say ‘nevermore.’ As I lace my boots up, I look at him and quote, “For we cannot help agreeing that no living human being, ever yet was blessed with seeing a bird above his chamber door.”
Kallen cocks his head to the other side clearly not getting the reference. “Funny,” I say as I stand up, “you’re about two hundred years older than Edgar Allen Poe yet you’ve never heard of him. You’ve missed out on a lot being locked in the Fae world.” With that, I step out of the cave to relieve myself somewhere amongst the trees. Yea, loving my life right now.
I was hoping that Kallen would have taken the hint and flown off while I was gone, but he is still in the cave when I come back. Only now, he is back to looking like himself. Great, just what my headache needed.
I don’t say anything as I sit down on my sleeping bag and cross my legs underneath me. I pull Mom’s grimoire into my lap and use the flashlight to begin reading because the lantern he had lit in my absence isn’t bright enough. Kallen has his back to the cave wall with his legs bent up and his arms resting on them. I can feel him staring at me no matter how hard I try to ignore him.
“I am sorry,” he says quietly. I’m not sure what exactly he’s apologizing for, it could be any number of things that have happened since I met him. I continue to ignore him and read the grimoire until he says, “I am sorry I kissed you.”
I slam the book closed and glare at him. “Out of all the things you could have been sorry about, that’s what bothers you the most? But of course, you must feel dirty since your full-blooded lips touched those of a half-breed.”
He stands up and looking down at me from his immense height, he says, “I am sorry that I kissed you when I was angry. You deserve better than that.” Then before I can think of anything to say in response, he walks out of the cave into the snow.
Since I had slept most of the day, I’m not in the least bit tired. I read for a while but my mind keeps wandering and I can’t concentrate. Since this all started, my mind has been bombarded with so much information that I’m in brain overload. Putting the grimoire aside, I spend a few minutes just staring out at the snow that began falling again a short while ago. So pretty yet so freaking cold. When is this nightmare going to end?
The snow keeps falling and it’s getting thicker and thicker until I can’t really see anything outside of the cave. Despite myself, I’m worried about Kallen being out in this weather. It’s really easy to lose your bearings in weather like this in the mountains and end up freezing to death because you can’t find your way to shelter. I’m actually relieved when he comes in a few minutes later.
Standing just inside the cave, he shakes the snow from his head and face then he takes off his hat which must be soaked from the wet snow and I can’t help being impressed as it just disappears from his hand. When am I going to learn cool stuff like that? Since I haven’t been able to gain even the tiniest bit of control over my magic, probably never.
“I do not believe this is going to let up any time soon,” he says conversationally as he sits down across from me.
“Me either.” Apparently, we’re going to just ignore everything that’s happened between us. That’s fine with me.
“How is your rib?” he asks unzipping his jacket. The black shirt he has on underneath it is tight and highlights his lean muscular chest. Why couldn’t he be ugly so I’d stop noticing things like that?
“It’s better. It’s just the tiniest bit sore.”
“I am glad.”
Okay, where do we bring this conversation now? What else is there to talk about other than the weather and my rib. “What did you mean when you said you gave up your world?” Whoa, that came out of my mouth before I even knew my brain was thinking it. So much for light meaningless conversation.
Kallen’s face becomes stony and he turns away from me to look out at the snow. “I was angry; I said things to try to hurt you.”
“Why were you angry?”
Kallen sighs and turns back towards me. “Must we do this?”
“Do what?”
“Analyze everything that has happened. If I give you a blanket apology for all of my behavior since the time we first met, can we simply move forward?”
I study his face for a few minutes but I can’t read anything about what he’s thinking or feeling. I wish I had a poker face like that. Realizing this conversation isn’t going to go anywhere, I say the only thing left to say. “Yes.”
He nods and relief washes over his face. “Have you learned much from the grimoire?”
I nod. “Some. I’m still having some trouble with the words. Sometimes it’s like reading a different language. I’ve heard some of them before in songs my mom would sing to me but I still don’t know what they mean.”
He raises his eyebrows questioningly and says, “Such as?”
I narrow my eyes. “You’re not going to make fun of me for not knowing this stuff, right?”
A small, very small, smile touches his lips. “I will be on my very best behavior.”
I doubt that but I still ask, “What do deosil and widdershons mean?”
“Deosil means clockwise and widdershons means counterclockwise. You mentioned that your mother used to sing songs to you that had these words in them? You could sing one and I could attempt to decipher it for you if it is related to Witchcraft.”
I shake my head. “I’m a terrible singer.”
Kallen smiles again. “I doubt that. And what else do you have to do on a snowy night in a cave in the middle of nowhere?”
I eye him warily trying to determine if he’s serious or not. I’m not in the mood for any of his criticism. Okay, why not. The worst he can do is laugh at me and I’m getting used to him doing that. So, I begin to sing:
“Deosil go by the waxen moon - sing and dance the Witch’s Rune;
Widdershons go when the Moon doth wane, the wolf will howl by the dread wolf’s bane;
When the lady's moon is coming new, kiss your hand to her times two;
When the moon is riding at her peak, then your heart's desire you should seek.
Heed the north wind's mighty gale - lock the door and drop the sail;
When the wind is from the south, love will kiss thee on the mouth;
When the west wind blows o'er thee, the departed spirits will restless be;
Heed ye flower, bush, and tree - by the Lady blessed be.”
“The Witches’ creed,” Kallen remarks. “What an interesting way to teach it to you without telling you that you are a Witch.”
“As I look back at all the crazy things Mom said when I was growing up, I’m realizing she did that a lot.”
Kallen nods in agreement and then he begins to explain the song. “Deosil means clockwise and when making a ritual circle a Witch should move around in a clockwise direction when the moon is past the new and growing, or waxing, towards a full moon. Widdershons, or counterclockwise is the way to move as the moon wanes toward a new moon.”
“What is a ritual circle for?” I wish I didn’t have to keep letting him know just how ignorant I am, but on the other hand, that’s certainly not from my own doing.
Surprisingly, he doesn’t have a hint of condescension on his face
when he explains. “A ritual circle is drawn by a Witch to keep interfering forces out when he or she is working a particularly complicated spell. It can also be used to hide oneself. The circle becomes a place resting between realms and cannot be crossed from either realm if the Witch is strong enough to hold it.”
Okay, I know he’s going to mock me for this one. “Are there really werewolves?”
He shakes his head and smiles. “No, but an old wives’ tale says that wolves enjoy eating wolf’s bane so if you follow the sound of their howling you will find that particular plant. The simple truth is the plant simply thrives the best in the same environment as wolves do. Wolf’s bane is often used as a poison.”
“Which is why it is dreaded, okay, I get it. What about kissing your hand to the lady times two?”
“During the new moon, a Witch’s power is at its weakest and she must double her efforts if working spells at this time.”
True of Blood (Witch Fairy Series) Page 12