Amazing Monty

by Johanna Hurwitz

  So that was two surprises in one day.

  The third surprise didn’t come until supper time.

  Monty had already given his parents the good news about the two birds he wanted being in his classroom. And he’d explained about his duties as bird monitor. Then his mother said, “Well, Monty. We have some other good news for you, too.”

  Monty looked up from the string beans on his plate. “What is it?” he asked eagerly.

  “Monty, you are going to get a sibling,” his mother said.

  “I am? Wow. That’s great,” said Monty, beaming. “Wait till I tell my friends at school tomorrow.” Then he thought for a moment. “What’s a sibling?” he asked.

  “A sibling means a brother or a sister,” Monty’s father explained. “In a few months your mother will be having a baby, and then you will be a big brother.”

  “Wow,” said Monty. “First I lost my tooth, which shows I’m growing older, and next I’ll be a big brother.” He paused for a moment. “Will the baby be a boy or a girl?” he asked.

  “We don’t know,” said Monty’s mom. “It will be a surprise.”

  “So that means I could be a big brother to a little brother or a big brother to a little sister,” said Monty, digesting all this news together with his string beans and chicken cutlet.

  “Right,” said Mr. Morris.

  “I had three surprises today,” Monty said. “Starting with the two quarters under my pillow.”

  “Three surprises in one day is a lot,” his father said. “Now we’ll all be waiting for the baby. There will be a fourth surprise, when he or she comes.”

  “I know what,” said Monty excitedly. “Maybe the new baby will be twins. Then there will be five surprises.”

  “Oh, no,” said his mother. “Four surprises are enough.”

  “Okay,” Monty agreed. “Three surprises today. And one to go.”

  Every student in Monty’s class agreed: Despite her name, Mrs. Meaney was the nicest possible teacher. She was always smiling, and she rarely scolded. She was always surprising her students with clever games or treats. Of course, the biggest surprise so far was the arrival of the class pets, Yankee and Doodle. There was not one student in class 1-M who didn’t love Mrs. Meaney. In fact, the students had given their teacher a new name. They all called her “Mrs. Nicey.”

  So the day they entered the classroom and saw another woman standing at the chalkboard, everyone was very surprised. They whispered to one another about the strange woman.

  “Do you think Mrs. Nicey is sick?” Cora Rose asked Monty in a soft voice.

  Monty shrugged. “Maybe she had to go somewhere like jury duty. My dad had to go to jury duty last month.”

  “What’s jury duty?” asked Cora Rose.

  Before Monty could begin explaining, the woman in the front of the room called out, “Everyone in their seats. I don’t want any talking at all.”

  “Mrs. Nicey always lets us talk until the morning bell rings,” Joey explained.

  “I’m not Mrs. Nicey or Mrs. Meaney, and I said no talking,” the woman told them. “I am Mrs. Bettlebooth, and I am your substitute teacher while Mrs. Meaney is out ill.”

  “What’s the matter with her?” asked Monty anxiously.

  “No calling out,” said the substitute. “You,” she pointed at Cindy Green. “Get in your seat.”

  Cindy Green had been hanging her jacket in the back closet. It kept slipping off the hook and she kept putting it back. That was bad enough. Now this terrible lady was yelling at her. Cindy Green started crying.

  “Look. Cindy is crying,” said Paul Freeman.

  “Turn around and mind your own business,” Mrs. Bettlebooth told Paul.

  “You can’t tell me what to do,” said Paul. “You’re not my teacher.”

  “I am your teacher for today. And maybe for tomorrow and the rest of the week as well,” the substitute told him.

  She looked at the students. “I don’t want to hear a peep out of any of you now. I’m going to take attendance.”

  “Peep,” a voice called out from the back of the room.

  Everyone laughed and turned to see who had made the sound. Everyone except Mrs. Bettlebooth.

  “Silence!” she said in a loud voice.

  Cora Rose stood up. She walked over to the birdcage and opened it.

  “And what do you think you’re doing?” Mrs. Bettlebooth asked her.

  “This week it’s my turn to take care of Yankee and Doodle,” said Cora Rose. “We always do that while our teacher takes attendance.”

  “Well, that’s just dandy,” snarled Mrs. Bettlebooth. “Sit down.”

  “But Yankee and Doodle are hungry,” protested Cora Rose, still standing.

  “Sit down!”

  Cora Rose started crying. She sat down and wiped her nose on her sleeve.

  “Now you got two people crying,” said Joey.

  “I feel like crying, too,” whispered Monty.

  “Your name isn’t Mrs. Meaney but you sure act like a meany,” said Joey.

  The students all gasped. It was something they had all been secretly thinking, but none of them was brave enough to say aloud. Only now Joey did.

  Monty smiled at his friend. He was glad that Joey had said that.

  Mrs. Bettlebooth was just getting ready to scold Joey when a small green figure flew out of the open cage.

  “It’s Yankee,” called out Ilene.

  “No, it’s Doodle,” said Cora Rose. However, the truth was that even though the two birds had been in their classroom for six weeks, none of the students could tell them apart. Even Mrs. Meaney-Nicey admitted that they looked identical to her. When they were eating, one of the little green birds stuffed his mouth with seed after seed. The other bird ate one seed and spit out the husk. Then he would eat another. But if the two weren’t eating, it was impossible to know which was which.

  “Catch him,” Paul yelled.

  His words were like a signal for the first-graders. Immediately both Cora Rose and Cindy Green forgot about crying. All the other students forgot about the mean substitute.

  Everyone’s attention was on catching the bird that had gotten out of the cage.

  The bell rang for the start of the day. The attendance sheet lay on the teacher’s desk. No one paid any attention. Even Mrs. Bettlebooth ran after Yankee or Doodle. The bird circled the desks. He flew into the coat closet and out again. He flew to the window and then up toward the light, circling around and around.

  Monty noticed that the windows were open at the top. “Close the windows,” he shouted. “Quick, before Yankee or Doodle flies out.” He himself rushed to shut the classroom door so the bird would not escape down the hallway.

  Even though few of the students had followed her directions, Mrs. Bettlebooth did just what Monty told her. She took the long pole that was used to push the windows open and closed. In a minute, all three windows in the classroom were shut. Yankee or Doodle could not get out.

  Mrs. Bettlebooth walked over to the light switch. She turned off the light. The darkened room caught the attention of the students.

  “Will everyone please get into their seats,” Mrs. Bettlebooth said. She spoke in a softer voice than earlier. She didn’t sound so mean either.

  “She’s probably worried about Yankee or Doodle,” Monty whispered to Cora Rose.

  “Yankee or Doodle must be very hungry,” said Cora Rose. “They always get their dish filled with birdseed first thing in the morning.”

  Mrs. Bettlebooth looked at the students. No one looked at her, however. Everyone was looking up at the high window ledge where the little green bird was sitting.

  “Let me take attendance,” Mrs. Bettlebooth said. “Then we’ll figure out a way that we can get the bird back into his cage.”

  As none of the first-graders knew what to do, they were relieved that a grown-up was going to take charge, even if the grown-up was that mean Mrs. Bettlebooth.

  “Mrs. Meaney loves Yankee and Doodle,
” said Cindy. “She’ll be very sad if one of them is missing.”

  “We’ll all be sad,” Monty pointed out.

  “Don’t worry,” said the substitute. “The bird is not missing. He’s just in the wrong place at this moment.” She picked up the attendance sheet and called the roll. There was 100 percent attendance except for their missing teacher. Mrs. Bettlebooth handed the sheet to Ilene, who was seated in the front row. “Please take this to the office.”

  It was not Ilene’s turn to deliver the attendance sheet, but no one protested. “Be careful when you open the door,” warned Joey.

  Ilene opened the door a small crack and slid out. Everyone was happy that at least their bird was still inside.

  “Now,” said Mrs. Bettlebooth. “How do you think we can get that bird to return to his cage?”

  “We could get a ladder and climb up to the window,” suggested Paul.

  “Yeah. But maybe he’ll fly down while we’re climbing up,” remarked Joey.

  “Maybe he’ll just come down by himself,” said Cindy Green hopefully.

  “Maybe not,” said Monty. He didn’t think the birds minded being inside their cage. They sang and ate and jumped about all the time. But it was probably much more fun to fly around the room if you had wings and could do so.

  The door opened a crack. Ilene slid back inside. “Did you catch Yankee or Doodle?” she asked eagerly.

  “No,” the students all chorused.

  “Not yet,” said Mrs. Bettlebooth.

  Cora Rose raised her hand. “Can I please go and put birdseed into the cup for whichever bird is still inside the cage?” she asked.

  Mrs. Bettlebooth nodded.

  Cora Rose took the little cup out of the cage. She got the box of birdseed and opened its spout. Then she poured seeds into the cup and replaced it inside the cage.

  “All right,” said Mrs. Bettlebooth to Cora Rose. “Go wash your hands and we’ll go on with the day’s math lesson. Maybe a little later we’ll think of another way to catch the bird.”

  Slowly the students turned their attention to math. Monty tried hard to concentrate, but he kept thinking of Yankee or Doodle sitting up on the window ledge. He looked up at the bird just as it left its perch and flew down — right into the cage. The students and the substitute hadn’t even noticed that the door to the cage had been left open. Even the remaining bird didn’t seem to have noticed.

  Monty jumped from his seat and raced to the back of the room where the cage was located. In an instant, he slammed the door shut. Yankee and Doodle were both inside now. And they were both eating the birdseed that Cora Rose had given them.

  Everyone applauded and cheered!

  The rest of the school day passed quietly. By dismissal time, everyone agreed that Mrs. Bettlebooth was not nearly as mean as she had seemed first thing in the morning. After lunch, she couldn’t find the book that Mrs. Meaney had been reading aloud, and so she taught them some little poems that she knew in her head. Monty’s favorite was:

  I never saw a purple cow

  I never hope to see one.

  But I can tell you anyhow,

  I’d rather see than be one.

  All the students thought that was very funny.

  “I bet she was scared of us,” said Monty to Joey as they were walking home. “She didn’t know we were such a good class.”

  “You’re right,” said Joey. “But I still hope that Mrs. Meaney-Nicey comes back tomorrow.”

  Monty hoped so too. But he knew that even if their teacher was still out, tomorrow would start off much better.

  “So long,” he called to Joey as they reached their street. He could hardly wait to see his mom and tell her about the green birds and the purple cow. It was quite a day!

  It was a clear but cold Saturday afternoon. The wind came in gusts, blowing bits of grit and dried leaves about. Monty was warmly dressed with a heavy woolen sweater under his down jacket. It made it more difficult for him to move about, but he preferred it to the alternative of staying indoors. He was riding his scooter up and down the pavement near his house. Nearby, the twins, Ilene and Arlene, who lived down his street, were doing the same thing on their Rollerblades. Monty was careful not to bump into the sisters, but once the two girls bumped into each other. Then they both landed on the ground.

  “Why didn’t you watch out?” grumbled Ilene.

  “It was your fault,” complained Arlene.

  “No, it wasn’t,” Ilene said.

  “Yes, it was,” Arlene insisted.

  Monty listened to them shouting at each other. When his sibling grew up, he knew he’d never fight or yell at him or her. After all, he’d be almost seven years older, so it would be very different. Arlene had told him that she was eight minutes older than Ilene.

  “Big deal,” Ilene had responded.

  “It is a big deal,” said Arlene. “I am your big sister, so you should listen to me.”

  The twins didn’t fight often, but when they did it seemed very silly to Monty. Eight minutes was no big deal at all.

  Then the door opened at the Kelly house, and the twins’ mother came out. She called to her daughters. Both Arlene and Ilene jumped up from the ground, where they were still sitting and blaming each other for their fall. As he went by, Monty took one hand off the scooter and waved to Mrs. Kelly.

  Ilene called to Monty, “We’re going on some errands. Come with us.”

  Monty turned his scooter around and rode toward the girls. Mrs. Kelly had gone back into the house.

  “Come with us,” Ilene repeated.

  “Where are you going?” he asked.

  “We’re going to the —” said Ilene.

  “No. Don’t tell him. It will be a surprise,” Arlene told her sister.

  Monty looked from Arlene to Ilene. “Aren’t you going to tell me?” he asked her.

  But now Ilene was in full agreement with her twin. “It will be a surprise,” she said. “But it’s a great surprise. I love going to the —”

  “Stop!” shrieked Arlene. “Don’t tell him.”

  “How can I decide if I want to go if I don’t know where I’m going,” asked Monty.

  “Well, you’re going to get very lonely if you stay here riding your scooter without anyone to talk to,” Arlene pointed out.

  “It’s really, really fun,” said Ilene. “Say you’ll come.”

  Monty was getting curious. If they were going to the supermarket or a department store they wouldn’t make such a fuss. It must be somewhere super special, he decided.

  “Let me ask my mom,” he said.

  “Yeaaaa!” shouted Ilene, jumping up and down. Arlene grabbed her hands and jumped with her. Even though they were still wearing their skates, they didn’t fall.

  Monty rode back to his house. He pulled his scooter up the couple of front steps and told his mother about his invitation from the twins.

  “Where are you all going?” asked Mrs. Morris.

  “I don’t know,” Monty admitted. “It’s going to be a surprise.”

  “Okay,” said his mother. “Mrs. Kelly knows what you can and can’t do.” Mrs. Morris was referring to the occasional limitations on Monty’s activities because of his asthma. “Do you have your inhaler?” she asked.

  Monty put his hand in his pocket and pulled out his inhaler. It was a small device, made of plastic, that contained medicine. If he had trouble breathing, he put it inside his mouth and breathed. It always made him feel better.

  “All right,” said Monty’s mother, feeling reassured. “Have fun.”

  Arlene and Ilene were getting into the backseat of their car when Monty got to their house. “Sit in the middle,” Ilene instructed him.

  “Are you still not going to tell me where we’re going?” he asked.

  “Yep.”

  Monty didn’t care. It was fun to know that something special was going to happen. It had to be good or the twins wouldn’t be so excited about it.

  Mrs. Kelly checked that the three
children were all buckled in. “Off we go to the —”

  “Stop!” the girls shouted in unison.

  “We want to surprise Monty,” said Ilene.

  “Are we going to buy ice cream?” he asked.

  “No.”

  “To the public library?”

  “No.”

  The car started off down the street while Monty made a couple of other guesses.

  “To the new toy store at the mall.”

  “No.”

  “To the children’s museum.”

  “No.”

  Monty was running out of guesses. Where could they be going?

  “Here we are!” shouted Arlene.

  Monty looked around him. He saw a large sign that read CAR WASH.

  “Car wash?” he asked, puzzled.

  “Did you ever do this?” asked Mrs. Kelly.

  “No.”

  “It’s the most fun in the world. It’s like going on a ride at an amusement park,” said Ilene. “Wait and see.”

  “Aren’t you getting out?” asked Monty, unbuckling his safety belt.

  “No. No. Buckle up again,” said Mrs. Kelly. “Be sure your windows are closed.”

  Monty watched as Mrs. Kelly opened the front window and instructed an attendant about what she wanted done to the car. Then she closed her window and carefully steered the car up a ramp. A moment later, the car moved into a dark building. It was sort of like being in a tunnel. All was quiet.

  “Now the fun begins,” Arlene whispered to Monty.

  Then it began to rain. First it was a light shower. Then it began to rain really hard. Well, of course it wasn’t raining, Monty realized. But great streams of soapy water were pouring down onto the car’s roof and bouncing off the hood. Huge flaps of material were slapping against the sides of the car. Monty tried to look out the window, but it was soapy and wet and impossible to see outside. It was like being in a huge storm, but they were all safe and dry inside the car.