Cowboy Famous: Book 4 (Cowboy Justice Association)

by Olivia Jaymes

  Shit, now she felt kind of crappy. She’s been too emotional to think logically.

  “So you guys got a lead in the case?” Deputy Adam’s question broke in to the conversation and let Jazz off the hook from responding to Griffin.

  “Kind of. We need to do some more digging.” Apparently Griffin was done chewing her out and was now tapping a note into his phone. He barely spared a glance for his deputy. “We need to talk to Casey’s friends again. If anyone knows the guy’s name it will be one of her girlfriends.”

  “So there was another guy?” Adam persisted. “But you don’t know his name? That’s too bad.”

  Griffin scowled at Adam and then returned his attention to his phone. “A temporary setback. Drop us at the station, okay?”

  “Sure, boss. The station. This sure is exciting. A lead in a cold case.”

  “Can you just drop me at the hotel?” she asked Adam with a smile.

  “No, take us to the station,” Griffin contradicted. “We’re not done yet, Jazz.”

  He wanted to yell at her some more? Delightful.

  “I’m kind of hungry–” she began.

  “Don’t worry, I’ll feed you,” he answered smoothly. “We have a lot to discuss.”

  Shit. Shit. Shit.

  Jazz knew exactly what the sexy sheriff wanted to talk about. She’d revealed just a bit too much when questioning Margaret Charlock and now she was going to pay the price.

  Whoever said the truth hurts had really hit the nail on the head.

  Chapter Eleven

  Jazz’s stomach growled at the intoxicating smell of tomatoes, cheese, and garlic. With barely a word directed toward her, Griffin had picked up his old truck at the station, bundled her in it, stopped off at the only pizza joint in Hope Lake for some takeout, and he was now driving down the main road out of town. Not wanting to rock the boat further, Jazz hadn’t asked any questions about where they were going or what they were doing.

  At least he was planning to feed her before he killed her.

  Pulling off the main drag, Griffin drove slowly down a dark dirt road, the truck jostling her with every dip and pothole. She was just about to ask him where the hell he was taking her when they pulled into a clearing with a darling log cabin at the center. The porch was lit up along with a lamp in the front window.

  “How cute,” she exclaimed. “Who does this belong to?”

  “Me,” he answered shortly, grabbing the pizza from the backseat and making a beeline for the house. She pushed open the truck door, muttering under her breath about gentlemanly behavior and stubborn cowboy cops. At the top of the porch stairs, he stopped and whirled around, a frown on his handsome face.

  “Did you say something?”

  “Uh, no.” Jazz shook her head, trying to hide a smile. “Must have been the crickets.”

  “Right,” he snorted and turned back to open the door, switching on a few more lights as he walked to the back of the large room where the kitchen was located.

  “You don’t lock your door?” she asked, following close on his heels.

  For the first time in hours he smiled. “Who’s going to break into the sheriff’s house?”

  “Someone stupid?”

  He laughed as he pulled a stack of paper plates out of a cabinet. “They’d have to be. I’ve got cameras all over the place. I can see what’s going on here from my laptop or phone at every minute of the day.”

  “Paranoid much?”

  “Just realistic. My siblings sometimes like to drop in unannounced to go fishing. This way I know what I’m coming home to.”

  “How many siblings do you have?”

  She accepted the two cans of soda he’d pulled from the refrigerator and followed him as he pushed open the sliding glass door to what appeared to be a back deck.

  “Nine. Have a seat.”

  He’d flipped a switch and the large back patio was illuminated with what seemed like a thousand twinkle lights. To her shock, the back of the house overlooked a huge lake that shimmered under the moon and the lamps. It was absolutely beautiful and she sunk down into a chair at the table for six and drank in the peace. There was no sound but a few crickets and the croaking of a frog.

  “This is gorgeous but, holy shit, I had no idea there was a lake back here. If the lights were off I could have just walked right into the water without realizing it. I might have drowned.”

  “I think you’re being a tad dramatic.” Griffin opened the pizza box and nudged it towards her so she could go first.

  Maybe he was more of a gentleman than she’d given him credit for earlier.

  Pulling two pieces from the large pie, she bit into the slice and hummed with pleasure. Good pizza.

  Griffin smiled at her approval and helped himself to a couple of slices. “The guy that owns the pizza place really knows his stuff, doesn’t he?”

  She nodded in agreement and they ate in silence until their stomachs were full. Popping open her root beer, she sat back in her chair with a satisfied sigh.

  “So you have nine siblings. What was that like?”

  She’d always wanted a brother or sister. It would have been nice to have the company, almost like a built-in best friend.

  Griffin took a swig of his own soda. “Crowded and loud. There was never enough of anything. Space, food, money, toilet paper. Nothing. It was an economics lesson in the scarcity of resources.”

  “I’m sure it wasn’t that bad,” she denied. “It must have been fun having all those brothers and sisters around. I would have loved to have been brought up in a big family.”

  “Which part do you think was the most fun?” he taunted. “Changing their diapers? Giving them a bottle? Getting stuck at home babysitting when I wanted to be out with my friends? No, wait, it had to be the part where all twelve of us lived in a three bedroom house with one bathroom. It got so bad when my sisters became teenagers that my dad dug an outhouse in the back yard.”

  Bowled over by his vehemence, she exhaled slowly. “Clearly I’ve hit a nerve.”

  “I’m sorry.” Griffin’s lips twisted into a wry smile. “It’s just that everyone thinks that growing up in a big family is like on television with The Brady Bunch and Eight Is Enough. It’s not even close.”

  “So you don’t get along with your family?”

  That seemed to surprise him. “I love my family. They’re wonderful people. What makes you think I don’t get along with them?”

  “Um, because you just said growing up was a version of hell?”

  He chuckled and stood from his chair, leaning on the deck railing and looking out over the lake. “As long as I don’t have to share my bedroom or bathroom, I think my family is awesome. The best. My mom and dad were great parents and we all turned out okay.”

  “But you had to help out a lot? Were you the oldest?”

  Suddenly she wanted to know everything about him. His childhood. His teenage years. Every single detail.

  “The third oldest. I had an older brother and sister. Mom just loved babies so she kept having them. Dad must have too, I guess. They used to laugh and say they were fielding a baseball team. They loved us and did their best to make sure we had what we needed. It wasn’t easy. Dad owns the auto repair shop in town so we were never rich by any stretch. Mom had been a school teacher but after the first baby she opened a home daycare business in our renovated garage. Lucky me, I got to be around even more kids then.”

  “Three bedrooms and one bathroom couldn’t have been easy,” she remarked, trying to draw him out further. “I never thought of myself as lucky not having to share anything.”

  “It wasn’t bad with the first six of us. It was the last four that really squeezed us in. My parents kept saying they were going to buy a new house but they loved living on that piece of property away from town. Then Dad said he was going to build a bigger house, but there always seemed to be other things to do and spend money on. The two youngest still live at home. They have their own rooms so they’re probably no
t in a hurry to move out.”

  “So they come here to fish? Your brothers and sisters?”

  “They come here to escape.” Griffin chuckled and tossed his soda can into a garbage pail. “They come here for the same reason I bought this place. Peace and quiet. Can you feel it, Jazz? The whole day falls away when I sit back here in the evening or have my coffee in the morning. Nothing matters but the silence. You can hear yourself think. That’s not a common state, honey. And I have it. It belongs to me.”

  She could feel what he was talking about and how important it was to him. This place did have a magical quality to it that seemed to soothe the soul. She could imagine him sitting out here with a beer after a long, hard day, his feet propped up on the railing, a smile on his face.

  She could imagine herself sitting next to him, their hands entwined. Not talking but just absorbing the tranquility.

  Don’t go there.

  Pushing away the intimate thoughts, she instead concentrated on the words he’d left unsaid.

  “You couldn’t hear yourself think growing up?”

  He turned to stare over the lake, his broad shoulders and back facing her. “Rarely. I find that I like living alone. I like having my space. I suppose as a woman that bothers you. I find that most women think that a man alone is a problem.”

  Pushy know it all alpha male.

  “My, oh my, we do make assumptions, don’t we?” Jazz laughed at his challenge. He might like to fish, but this little guppy wasn’t dumb enough to take the bait. “I think maybe, just maybe you’ve met the wrong women. As for myself, I have a roommate so I love it when I’m home alone. I love the peace and quiet. Probably because that’s all I had growing up.”

  He turned and crossed his arms over his chest, a smile playing on his lips. “The wrong women, huh? Let me ask you a question. You’re dating a guy, okay? And you go back to his place to have sex. When you’re done what do you do?” He held up his hand. “Let me answer that question for you. You want to cuddle and then fall asleep. Maybe even talk about your feelings. You steal all the covers and insinuate yourself into the middle of the bed, draping yourself over him so he has to lie still so you can sleep. Then you want to spend the night. That’s what you do,” he stated.

  By the time he’d finished, Jazz was laughing so hard her ribs hurt. Man, Griffin had some issues he needed to work on.

  “First of all, I make sure to bring the guy back to my place so I have control of the situation. Second, when we’re done I usually hint for him to leave, honestly. I mean, don’t get me wrong. Sex is great and everything and I love mixing it up in the middle of the bed, but when it’s over it’s over. He either needs to go home or we need to retire to our neutral corners of the mattress. I’m not much of a cuddler if you want to know the truth. I’m too fidgety. And I can’t sleep with some guy wrapped around me either. Shit, you’re like freakin’ furnaces and I wake up all sweaty. Yuck.”

  His shocked expression made her laugh all the harder, her giggles echoing in the dark. He shook his head as if he didn’t believe a word she’d said, which he probably didn’t.

  “That hasn’t been my experience. I mean, at all. I’m not sure if you’re telling me the truth or saying something you think I want to hear.”

  “I have no clue what you want to hear,” Jazz declared. “But I do know why women do that stuff to you.”

  His eyebrows shot up and he leaned forward so his palms were flat on the table. “You have my undivided attention. Do tell.”

  “You’re a catch, Sheriff Sawyer. You’re gainfully employed. Honest and hard-working, which believe me is damn near impossible to find in a man. You’re also tall, dark, and handsome. Shit, I bet you have to beat them off with a stick. These women are trying to become a fixture in your life without you noticing. They want to end your lonely bachelor existence,” she said dryly. “They want to get married and make you the groom.”

  Even in the dim light she could see a dark streak on his cheekbones. She’d embarrassed him.

  “I don’t make all that much money and my brothers are better-looking than I am.”

  That was saying something because Griffin Sawyer was hot. Or maybe his personality just made him seem that way. At this point she wasn’t sure anymore.

  “Fuck, and modest too. I’m surprised the ladies in these parts aren’t camped out on your doorstep. Is there anything wrong with you?”

  Griffin straightened up and smiled. “Sure is. I don’t like women invading my space. I don’t like sharing. I don’t like taking care of anyone. You know, all those things that people in relationships do.”

  “You should see someone about that then,” she shot back, enjoying his good mood. He didn’t take himself too seriously and wasn’t conceited in the least. Living in Hollywood she’d known her share of men that were completely stuck on themselves.

  “It’s not a problem. For me.” Griffin shrugged and sat back down at the table across from her. “Now let’s talk about your issues.”

  She’d thought she was home free but he’d only lulled her into a false sense of security.

  Jerk.

  * * * *

  The tiny little blonde wore an outraged expression much to Griffin’s amusement. Despite her questions about his hectic childhood he’d never lost focus of the reason he’d brought her here. They needed to have a chat about her animosity toward Margaret Charlock. If this was going to be a recurring issue during the investigation he needed to know about it now.

  “I don’t know what you’re talking about.”

  Her cute elfin chin was lifted in bravery but her lips were trembling. She knew exactly what he was talking about and she wasn’t leaving here until they had it out.

  “Yes, you do,” he replied calmly, not budging an inch. “C’mon Jazz, we need to discuss this. I brought you here away from the cameras and the prying eyes of the town so we could talk privately. It’s time.”

  Wringing her hands together, she chewed on her lips and seemed to mull his words over. He stayed quiet letting Jazz gather her thoughts, not hurrying. He’d learned a lot of patience as one of ten children.

  “I’m an only child,” she finally said, the words coming out in a rush. He’d noticed she did that when she was nervous. He didn’t want her to be nervous now but he needed to know what was bothering her.

  “Okay,” he said slowly, keeping his voice soft. “I figured that when you said you wished you’d grown up in a large family. Was it lonely, Jazz?”

  Blinking several times as if to hold back tears, she was quiet again, pondering his question. Eventually she nodded, her gaze going over his shoulder, looking past him and out at the lake.

  “Yes. I was alone a lot. Except when I was at school. I had a lot of friends there. I was popular and was involved in the drama club. I liked school.”

  He digested her words and tried to form a question that sounded non-threatening but still got to the heart of what he needed to know.

  “I bet you were popular. A pretty little blonde like you must have had a bunch of boyfriends. Were you a cheerleader?”

  She smiled, her gaze still far away, and nodded. “I was. I was senior class vice-president too.”

  “Prom queen?”

  Jazz shook her head but her smile didn’t falter. Whatever memories she was thinking about at the moment were good ones. “Abigail Dennis was prom queen. Much prettier than me. And she was senior class president.”

  Griffin heartily doubted that this Abigail person was better looking than Jazz.

  He hated to take the smile away but he had a terrible feeling his next statement was going to do exactly that.

  “Your parents must have been very proud of you.”

  Her smile vanished.

  “They were busy.”

  Griffin felt his heart start to ache in sympathy. His Jazz was wearing a sad little expression and it was all he could do not to pull her onto his lap and hold her until she smiled again.

  His Jazz? What the fuck was he
thinking? She wasn’t his anything except deputy in training.

  “They were too busy for you weren’t they, honey?” he asked gently. He could see the parallel lines between Casey’s life and Jazz’s clearly now. This was why she’d wanted the case. This was why she wanted to bring justice to Casey.

  “They should never have had children.” Jazz’s voice sounded small in the silence. “They loved each other so much there just wasn’t anything left for anyone else.”

  As part of a big family, Griffin knew love wasn’t like a pie with bigger and smaller slices handed out to a few lucky people. Love was like a giant rubber band that kept on stretching, making room for everyone. Love compounded on itself exponentially. His parents hadn’t run out of love with ten children. They’d had more than enough for their family.

  “Did they hurt you?” His voice grated and he winced inwardly at the awkward question as a few tears fell from her eyes.

  “No. Never. Not once.” Jazz shook her head and the deck lights made her tears shiny on her cheeks. “They just…ignored me. I had all the things I could want. I just didn’t have parents. My friends thought it was cool that I had so much freedom. I was jealous that their parents cared what time they came home and who they were with.”

  Pulling her attention from the lake, she finally looked at him, her expression crumpled. He’d brought this on and he would have to deal with the aftermath, but he’d had no choice.

  “I don’t remember them ever hugging me.” Reflexively, she pulled her knees close to her chest and wrapped her arms around her legs as if to hold herself close. He had to fight the urge to wrap his own arms around her. He swallowed the lump that had taken up residence in his throat upon hearing her sad story. How could her mother and father not adore her? She was everything lovable and then some.