Tell Me No Secrets

by Lynda Stacey

  She thought of the accident, of what her mother had said the night before and of Eve. ‘Oh no, I didn’t call Eve.’ She jumped up from her seat, but Ben pulled her back under the blanket and put his arm around her. The touch of his hand sent an electric shock down her spine, her legs trembled and her stomach did a somersault.

  ‘Don’t worry,’ he said as his eyes searched hers. ‘Eric said he was going over after work. He has an early finish today.’

  ‘Seriously. Why would he do that?’ Kate’s voice was concerned. ‘They’ve only met the once. Haven’t they?’

  ‘He said something about taking her to join his book club.’ Ben smiled. ‘Eric’s harmless and probably very good for Eve. Trust him.’

  ‘But she barely knows him!’ Kate yelled as she searched frantically through her bag for her mobile phone.

  ‘Kate, she’s fine. Stop fussing.’

  Kate hesitated before settling back down under the blanket. ‘But they’re so different. In fact, I’d say they’re poles apart. I mean, do they even like the same kind of books?’

  Did Eve like Sherlock Holmes novels? Why didn’t she know this about her own twin?

  Kate settled down in the arc of Ben’s arm. They were pretending to be married and Kate had begun to quite enjoy the role play. Besides, it was the perfect excuse to curl up close. Ben made her feel secure, comfortable and wanted. He also made her feel safe as her stomach once again lurched but this time because the boat bounced up and down on the swell. The gulls swooped overhead in the hope that they might find food and the abbey loomed impressively on the cliff top. It rose up out of the rock, high above where they now sailed. Beside it stood the car park where they’d left Patrick earlier that morning, which reminded Kate that those steps would once again have to be climbed, before they’d be travelling back to Bedale.

  Ben looked down as Kate slept. He’d hated seeing her so upset that morning. His heart had gone out to her and he’d have done anything within his power to take away her pain. Now she cuddled into him for the second time that day and slept. Had she felt safe in his arms, or had she simply been so exhausted that she’d practically collapsed with the movement of the boat on the waves? He hoped she’d felt safe, hoped she’d felt comfortable in his presence. He liked her, but she was broken and hurt, just like he had been. He looked down at her. Her hurt was far deeper and much more current than his. After all, he’d had four years in which to heal. He had internal scars, but none that showed, unlike her and he had no idea how she would ever come to terms with the scarring on her face, the crippling of her sister, or the death of her brother, especially when she knew that ultimately her whole family really had blamed her. Ben glanced down at the left-hand side of her face. The scar was clearly visible, yet it didn’t alter the fact that she was still unbelievably beautiful. It had most probably faded a little over the past year and he lifted his hand to gently stroke her face, his finger carefully drawing a line across her jawbone and, for some reason, he felt an urge to magic it away, but to do that would change her and to him she looked perfect.

  The boat came to a halt by the harbour. Ben looked up at the captain, indicating that he give them some time and Ben mentally kicked himself. He was supposed to be investigating the captain. But instead, he hugged Kate ever more tightly. It was far too soon to wake her, far too soon to let her go. She was exhausted and needed the sleep and he was content to sit and allow her to wake up in her own time.

  Besides, for the first time in years, he held a woman in his arms. He’d missed the feeling and was more than aware that once she woke, he might never get to hold her this way again.

  Kate stirred as she felt Ben’s touch on her face. His finger drew a line along her scar, making her breath catch in her throat. Never before had she been comfortable with anyone seeing the scar up close and never before had she allowed anyone other than a doctor to touch it, but for some reason she didn’t move. The boat rocked now rather than bounced. This indicated to her that they were back in the harbour and the boat had come to a stop. Keeping her eyes closed for just a few moments more, she felt Ben’s face lower to hers, as he cuddled in. She was warm, comfortable and, for just a moment, she felt more content than she’d ever felt before. Then, she felt Ben’s face lower to hers again. His lips gently brushed hers and she opened her sleepy eyes to look into his. They were jet black, deep, welcoming and shone like ebony. She held his gaze.

  ‘You … you kissed me,’ she whispered. The words were all she could manage to say as her fingers went up to touch her lips.

  ‘I did.’ He paused and Kate knew that he was thinking of his next words carefully. ‘What was it you said? Better to steal one, than to ask for permission.’ He nodded. ‘Well, I was testing your theory and I think you are right; forbidden fruit really is more fun.’

  She smiled. ‘Touché.’ Sitting up, she looked around to see where they were. ‘I’m sorry I fell asleep again. I … I barely slept, you know, last night.’

  ‘Don’t worry. I understand. You’ve had a horrid few days, you must be shattered.’ His hand reached up and touched her face and for a moment, Kate thought he’d repeat the kiss. But instead, he smiled, stood up, stretched and folded the blankets for the captain to retrieve, before winking at her and adding, ‘Oh, and by the way, you snore like a train.’

  Kate tried to playfully slap Ben as he jumped from the boat, and ran back up the steps to the quayside.

  ‘Oh you’re horrid, why on earth did I marry you?’ she joked, knowing the captain was still watching from afar. ‘And I’m starving, so if you don’t buy me some fish and chips soon, I may consider divorce.’

  Ben took the hint and steered Kate further along the quayside.

  ‘Right. Wait here, just for a few minutes. I need to go back and pretend you lost an earring or something,’ Ben announced as he turned back towards the Red Lady.

  Kate caught his arm. ‘Why?’ she searched his eyes with hers, a look of amusement crossing her face.

  ‘I need to get some answers. I was so content, sitting there hugging you, I totally forgot the investigation. I should have been looking for clues. If he is involved, there would have to be something. I won’t be long.’ Ben began to walk away and Kate burst into laughter and held up her mobile phone.

  ‘Do you mean like photographs of maps, and compass points? Along with Isobel Reed’s phone number, and a date and time of a meeting, along with quantities of drugs that are about to be dropped? I found it all scribbled on a pad, in the room beyond the toilet. It was locked at first, but it’s amazing what a safety pin and a nail file can do.’ She smiled, and looked pleased with herself as Ben studied the photos. ‘What do you think I was doing? You know, when I went to find the toilet? Oh yes, that’s right, I was being a private investigator.’

  Kate had got her sparkle back, and chatted all through lunch to Ben about her love of North Yorkshire, and her visits to her grandmother’s cottage as a child, along with Eve and James. They would have days when they would all drive for miles, just looking for the perfect picnic spot after going to the creamery.

  ‘Grandmother would sit on the rug with a loaf of homemade bread, a pack of butter, our newly bought cheese and a big knife.’ She laughed. ‘She’d butter the bread fresh because she knew I liked it that way. We could eat the whole loaf between us.’

  Ben smiled. He liked the way her face came to life when she spoke, how her hands became animated as she described how her childhood and teenage years had been before the accident. It was as though her whole life had been split in two. There was her life before and her life after the accident. But this he could understand.

  He thought of the kiss he’d just stolen, of how Kate had reacted. She’d questioned it, but hadn’t looked surprised or offended and he wondered for a moment if she’d thought it part of the act, of their pretending to be newlyweds. But then, as they’d stood together, he’d considered kissing her again, but in a real, more loving way. But he hadn’t. It hadn’t felt right. A first kiss sh
ould be special, full of hope, passion and trust and he decided that he had to think of a better way, a more romantic approach.

  Chapter Twenty-Seven

  ‘Hi, how are you?’ Eve asked as she sat in the front seat of Eric’s car. He had folded up her wheelchair and put it in the back, before getting in and starting the engine. She glanced at him and smiled. He was cute and kind of geeky and she’d fast come to the conclusion that it was a look that she liked.

  ‘Are you as nervous as I am?’ he asked, with a genuine look of concern.

  Eve shuffled in her seat and nodded. She thought back to a conversation she’d had with Kate, the one where Kate had commented that Eric had reminded her of Clark Kent and now that she looked, she had to agree, he did. She couldn’t get the image out of her mind, nor could she dismiss the idea that she’d like to take off his glasses and see if the man beneath lived up to her Superman expectations. She took in a deep breath and breathed out a little too heavy, making it sound like a sigh.

  ‘I’m a bit of both. A bit excited, but a bit nervous too. I just hope I can get in and out of the house without too much of a problem. Do they know I’m disabled?’ she asked as she indicated her chair before clicking the seat belt tightly into position.

  ‘W-w-why would that matter? I’ll help you,’ Eric stuttered as Eve looked up and into his eyes. He really was nervous, nothing like the men she’d previously dated and, for that reason alone, she liked him.

  ‘Great. Ever since the accident I’ve grown to love books. Don’t think I’ve ever read as much in my life as I have in the past year. And the idea of a book club sounds fun.’ She smiled and tried to sound positive. ‘But …’ She looked at her watch. ‘… I do have to be home by four.’

  ‘Oh, okay. Really?’ Eric looked disappointed.

  ‘I have a dog. Max. I need to get back to let him out. You can help me if you like?’ She flashed him her warmest smile, a smile that she hoped would encourage him to stay for an hour or two after they got home.

  Eric smiled back, a smile that lit up his face and made Eve forget all about Clark Kent.

  Eric pulled the car up outside the home of Megan Ahearn. She was an Irish lady with a huge personality and her home was comfortable, but definitely lived in. There were old rugs on the floor, a big open log fire, magazines in piles under footstools and Royal Doulton china ladies on side tables. No one could call it untidy, but Eve found it overbearing. The thought of knocking Megan’s ornaments over with her wheelchair terrified her and she kept her chair as close to the door as she could.

  ‘Eat up, my dear Eve. Women should have curves,’ Megan said, grinning as she handed Eve a second piece of cake. ‘Your boyfriend, he needs something to grab hold of, if you know what I mean?’ Her strong Irish accent sang out as she laughed, holding her hands up as though grabbing someone’s backside.

  The others in the room all agreed and Eve felt herself blushing as she looked over to where Eric sat with his head in a book. She was unsure whether to correct Megan, tell her that Eric wasn’t her boyfriend, even though the thought of him being one did seem quite appealing. She decided to stay quiet and to say nothing.

  ‘How are you doing?’ Eric asked as he walked over to her and sat down on the chair to her side.

  ‘I’m good, but so full of tea and cake I could burst,’ she whispered, hoping that the lovely Megan didn’t hear. ‘I really hope she doesn’t expect me to drink any more. I’m terrified of moving the chair, terrified of knocking things over and going to the loo at other people’s houses can be a bit tricky.’

  They chuckled together as the group took out their books and began to read out loud. Eve hadn’t read the book but the whole afternoon was fun and for the first time in over a year she began to feel that making a circle of friends for herself wouldn’t be that hard. In fact, it was something she really wanted to do.

  On the drive back to Eve’s, Eric tried to explain who everyone in the club was, adding his own opinions of them.

  ‘Do you think they liked me?’ Eve asked as she turned and looked at Eric, who’d now stopped the car, stopped talking and looked down, as though unsure what to say next.

  ‘Eve, how could anyone not like you?’ he finally said, turning toward her and carefully lifting his hand to her cheek. ‘Actually, I’m sorry. That was inappropriate, I shouldn’t do that.’ He dropped his hand, making Eve stare at the uncertainty in his eyes. She’d enjoyed his touch. It had been the first time anyone had touched her with affection since the accident. It had been as though the minute she’d been seated in the chair, someone had put a banner around her neck that said, Don’t touch, incapable of sexual feeling. But she was capable, and she did want the affection that Eric showed her.

  ‘I don’t break,’ she said as she took hold of his hand. ‘Honestly.’ She lifted it back to her face, gently holding it to her lips. She gazed into Eric’s eyes; he had a look of kindness, not of pity. It was genuine, caring and not a look that Eve had seen very often, and right now it was everything she needed to know as she raised her hands to his glasses, waited for just a second and then slowly lifted them from his face.

  Chapter Twenty-Eight

  ‘Come on then, tell all. How was your afternoon with Eric?’ Kate asked as she and Eve spread out their picnic blanket. They’d pitched their spot on the central grassed area of Richmond Castle, while a very energetic Max, being out of harness, took the opportunity to run back and forth. He chased his ball, ran around in circles, and dodged the empty wheelchair while running and sniffing at the ground for scent.

  Unlike the day before, the sky was clear and the sun shone brightly. The grass had dried, making it a pleasure to sit on. Both looked nervously toward the shop as they spoke, making sure their mother couldn’t hear. She’d trundled in there the moment they’d arrived at the castle and twenty minutes later she still hadn’t emerged.

  ‘Eric’s lovely. We had a great time,’ Eve replied in a whisper as Kate began to take out the fresh bread, slicing it and buttering it, just as her grandmother had done so many years before. Placing the bread on plates, she unwrapped the ham, coleslaw, scotch eggs and quiche. The sight of which made Max stop running around. He instantly took a liking to the idea of food and sat before them both, patiently waiting to be given a treat.

  Eve lay back on the blanket. ‘We’re reading The Secret Keeper by Kate Morton. It’s really good.’ Kate noticed that Eve sounded excited, maybe for the first time in a year. ‘It’s two stories, set in different times. A young girl witnesses a crime while she’s hiding in a tree house and fifty years later it all comes back to haunt her.’

  ‘Eve, I don’t want to know what you’re reading, silly. I want to know how all this happened. You only met Eric the other night and now you’re going out on dates with him?’ she asked, amused that her sister would do something so completely unpredictable.

  ‘Kate, I have been on a date before. Quite a few, actually. Eric asked and I said yes. It wasn’t a secret.’ Eve smiled shyly and for a moment she once again resembled the young and carefree teenager.

  ‘Will you be seeing him again?’ Kate asked hesitantly, hoping that Eric had enjoyed the day as much as Eve had.

  ‘Of course. He’s taking me out to dinner tomorrow,’ she responded enthusiastically and flicked her hair in a way that Kate had not seen her do in years. ‘A carvery at the creamery in Hawes.’

  Kate smiled. It was good that Eve had a new friend. Her sparkle had returned and by the look of how she blushed, he’d already become a little more than just a friend.

  Eve lifted herself back up into a sitting position. ‘So, are you going to tell me about Ben?’

  Kate sighed. She thought of the lovely day that she’d spent with Ben, the trip to the abbey, the lovely cuddly boat ride, the stolen kiss, the fish and chips and the way he’d playfully chased her up the ninety-nine steps, even though the run had just about finished them both off.

  The whole day had made her think about Rob, about his involvement with Isobe
l and about moving on. After what she’d heard outside Isobel’s house, she never wanted him touching her again. She wanted him to leave and, as far as she was concerned, the sooner the better. He’d barely been home for weeks. But Kate didn’t care; not any more.

  ‘I’m back,’ her mother’s voice bellowed as she wove her way between other groups of people who lay on the grass of the castle grounds. She had a bottle held tightly in her hands. ‘Mead, darling, your father and I love it.’ Kate stared in disbelief and confusion, as she watched her mother carefully pack the bottle into her bag. ‘I thought I’d buy him a bottle, it’ll make him so happy.’

  Mother was acting as though nothing had been said, as though she was about to pop home as soon as they were done with the picnic and take the husband that she was supposedly divorcing a bottle of mead. Kate crossed her fingers, knowing that her father would know what to do. She really hoped that he would persuade her to see a doctor, get some medical help or at least talk to someone. She also hoped that, with any luck, he would come and take her back home soon.

  But Kate still felt bitter. She still couldn’t believe how nasty her mother had been, and how she’d admitted that she blamed her for the accident. By the end of that day, Kate had not only hated her mother, but she’d hated herself too.

  ‘So, does this mean you’re going home?’ Eve asked hopefully. Saying exactly what both twins were thinking.

  ‘No, dear. Your father’s working away. Why did you think I’d come? He wants me to stay here, it was him that told me to come. He thought I’d be better with you two, rather than being home alone and it’s just for a few more days,’ she said as she sat down on the grass. ‘He has a reason for everything, you know that and I’ve found it easier over the years not to argue.’