Look Always Forward (Bellingwood Book 11)

by Diane Greenwood Muir

  Polly grinned and took Camille's hand. "I'll speak to Jeff. While she's here, she might as well stay in the room next to yours. There's no reason you two have to share. I can't wait to meet your mother."

  They separated and Polly headed for the library with a lilt in her step. There was nothing more fun than getting to know someone new.

  CHAPTER ELEVEN

  The next morning, Polly stood at the kitchen sink. Henry had already gone to work and Rebecca was just starting to rouse. Kayla would be there soon and Polly had promised the three kids a ride in her new truck. She looked out the window to see her four Percherons walk past, each with a rider. She recognized Jason and Eliseo and waved, but they didn't see her. They turned the corner and headed east, toward Sycamore Inn and the winery.

  "Polly?" Rebecca said quietly.

  Polly jumped and squealed, startling both cats.

  "I'm sorry!" Rebecca said.

  "No, I was focused on the horses," Polly said, pointing out the window. "I didn't hear you come in."

  Rebecca had all of her sheets in a bundle.

  "What's up?" Polly asked.

  "It started last night," Rebecca said, her head bent down. "Now I'm in hell."

  Polly started laughing as soon as she realized what Rebecca was talking about. "Hell? That's one way of putting it. Are you okay?"

  "I'm fine. It just surprised me. I didn't think it was ever going to come and now I don't know if I want it to be here. I can't go swimming or do anything anymore, can I."

  "You know better than that," Polly said. They'd already talked about this and Rebecca's bathroom was stocked with what she needed. "But you have what you need?"

  Rebecca rolled her eyes. "Yes, but promise you won't tell Henry?"

  "I don't keep secrets from him, but we certainly won't talk about it in front of you. Shall we treat and wash your sheets?"

  Dragging the sheets behind her, Rebecca slumped her way to the bathroom near the media room where they'd installed a washer and dryer. "I don't feel very good. Do I have to go anywhere today?" she asked.

  That one threw Polly. She wanted to be as sympathetic as possible, but on the other hand, she didn't want Rebecca turning into a lump every month. "I tell you what. We'll start the sheets, then I want you to take a long shower and put on your favorite shorts and shirt. Make sure you're comfortable. You don't get to sit around and feel sorry for yourself today. You never know, tomorrow might get worse or the day after that might be a bad day and if you give up now, you'll never make it through this."

  Polly handed Rebecca the stain remover and let her deal with her sheets, walking out into Henry's office. She'd give her space to cope, but since this was part of every girl's life, Rebecca had to learn to manage it just like everyone else.

  She heard the washer start its cycle and waited for Rebecca to come out. When she didn't, Polly went to the doorway and pushed it open. "Are you okay in here?"

  At the sound of quiet sobbing, she pushed the door open and found Rebecca on the floor, her head in her hands and her knees pulled up to her chest.

  "Honey, what's wrong?"

  "I miss Mom," Rebecca said.

  Polly slid down to sit beside her and stroked Rebecca's hair. "I'll bet you do. I'm so sorry. And I get it. Mary had to help me through my first time and we weren't prepared at all. She'd completely forgotten that it was going to happen to me. And I was in school when it did. I had to go see the nurse and I was crying so hard they called Mary to come get me."

  "Was it embarrassing being at school when it happened?" Rebecca asked.

  "It wasn't too bad. I was in the bathroom when I discovered it, then I ran to the nurse's office. I was scared because nobody had ever talked to me."

  Rebecca giggled. "It would have been bad if your Dad had to have that conversation."

  "No kidding," Polly said. "Luckily, you have a million women around you and none of us are embarrassed about it."

  "Kayla started before school was out."

  "She did! Have you two talked about this?"

  "A little. Am I going to get bigger boobs now?"

  Polly started to laugh. "I think your boobs have already started developing. And I'm sorry to say, but your mom didn't have much, so you might not get much more than what you have."

  Rebecca looked down at herself. "I thought that maybe my period would give me more. I'm pretty flat."

  "You're fine. Whatever you have is perfect for you," Polly said.

  "Kayla's boobs are bigger than mine."

  "Yes they are, but she's a different girl than you. None of us are identical."

  "That's for sure," Rebecca said. "I'm sorry I cried."

  "This is one of those times you miss your mom. You're allowed to cry about that whenever you want."

  "Mom and I talked about this, too. She kinda scared me, Polly."

  Polly scrunched up her eyebrows. "What do you mean?"

  "She told me about a time when she was wearing white jeans and she..." Rebecca's voice dropped to a whisper. "Leaked. She was really embarrassed."

  "I think all of us have one embarrassing time in our lives. At least one. But look at me and think about your mom. We lived through it. Right?"

  "I don't want to do that."

  "You need to not worry. We'll do our best to pay attention. Is that why you want to stay home? You're worried?"

  Rebecca nodded and dropped her head down again.

  "Oh sweetie, I get that. Now, we can stay home today and then what are you going to do about tomorrow?"

  Rebecca lifted her shoulders and dropped them.

  "And the day after that?"

  "I dunno," Rebecca said quietly.

  "And what about next month? Are you planning to stay home from school for an entire week?"

  Rebecca looked up at her, the question in her eyes.

  Polly chuckled. "No. You don't get to stay home because of this. Did Kayla stay home?"

  "No," Rebecca said.

  "You can't be afraid of this. You can handle it. When we go out today, I'll be sure that we stop at places with bathrooms. This will all be okay. I promise."

  "Can I take extra clothes, too?"

  "Of course," Polly said with a laugh. "We'll put the bag in the bed of the truck. No one else needs to know it's there."

  "Okay." Rebecca stood up and offered a hand to Polly. "I'd better take a shower. Kayla will be here any minute. I'm sorry about being whiny."

  Polly walked into the other room with her. "There will always be scary stuff. Just promise me that you won't let them stop you from doing the things you love. Talk to me and we'll find our way through it, okay?"

  "Okay." Rebecca turned around. "It's not hell?"

  "I didn't say that," Polly said, laughing. "But you'll get used to it."

  ~~~

  "Where's Andrew today?" Polly asked when she walked into the kitchen. "I was going to take the kids out in my new truck."

  Sylvie looked up from her laptop. She tapped the screen and turned it so Rachel could read it. "That's what we're looking for. Would you check to make sure we have everything we need?"

  Rachel nodded and then grinned at Polly. "She found recipes from the Amanas. We're actually going to make a Boston Cream Pie."

  Polly looked sideways at Sylvie.

  "It's a cream cake with a ganache," Sylvie said. "This shouldn't be too difficult and if it's as wonderful as I think, it will be a huge hit in town."

  "That's my favorite cake in the world," Polly said. "The kids and I will come back and be taste testers."

  "Andrew won't be here," Sylvie said. "He's home with Padme."

  "Is he sick?" Polly asked.

  Sylvie stood up and reached under the counter and came back up with two large bowls. "Nope. Not sick. Just being an adolescent. We're nipping this in the bud today."

  Polly chuckled. "Whoops. What did he do?"

  "Little boy of mine decided that he was smarter than his mother last night and thought he could get away with telling me what'
s what. When Jason tried to warn him off, Andrew actually pushed him." Sylvie looked up, laughter in her eyes. "Can you believe it? He pushed Jason. What was that kid thinking?"

  "This doesn't sound like Andrew."

  Sylvie shrugged. "It's been building. I swear. Sometimes the week or two before school starts is the worst. My boys see it coming and they don't know how to handle themselves."

  "What did Jason do?" Rachel asked.

  "He was confused," Sylvie said. "They've always wrestled, but Jason usually initiates it. When he started getting stronger, we talked about being careful. He works at it. I was proud when he backed up and looked at me, as if to ask what he could get away with."

  "I'd have let Jason pound on him," Polly remarked.

  "That's what Andrew wanted. He was spoiling for a fight. I told Andrew that he needed to apologize to me for being disrespectful and to Jason for getting physical. He informed us that he had no intention of doing either thing. He was right and Jason shouldn't have gotten between us."

  "What in the world?" Polly asked. "That doesn't sound like Andrew. At all. He's so easy going. This just isn't normal."

  "Trust me," Sylvie said. "I gave up on normal a long time ago. He stormed off to his room last and refused to talk to us. This morning when Jason and I were getting ready to leave, he informed me that he was staying home. I informed him that was just fine."

  Polly shook her head. "Sylvie, something must have happened."

  "You're right. But until he's ready to talk, I can't do anything and I won't put up with bad behavior. He needs to learn that right now. The rest of it will come out when it does and then he can swim back out of the muck he's creating." She looked at the prep table and the ingredients Rachel had assembled. "Do we have everything?"

  "It's all there," Rachel said.

  "I need to get busy, Polly. I'm sorry if Andrew screwed up your day."

  "No, it was no big deal. I'll take the girls. We'll do the day without him. Have fun with whatever you're doing here." Polly went out the back door and up the steps to her apartment. She couldn't imagine what would have set Andrew off enough to bring out this behavior. She hadn't seen much of him the last couple of days, so didn't know if he'd been acting out while he was here. She wasn't bringing it up with Kayla and Rebecca. They didn't need to be part of this. He'd figure it out and the world would move forward anyway.

  When Polly got upstairs, she was surprised not to see any of the animals come running. No one was in the media room, so she called out, "Rebecca? Kayla?"

  "In here," Rebecca called back from her bedroom. The bedroom door opened as Polly walked into the living room, releasing Obiwan and the two cats.

  "What are you girls doing in there?" Polly asked. "Giving the animals a makeover?

  Kayla laughed. "Well, kinda. We shut the door because we didn't want Andrew barging in. Then the cats pawed at the door and whined and when we let them in, Obiwan came with them."

  "I see. Well, Andrew isn't feeling well today. He's not coming over, so you're safe."

  Polly caught a quick glimpse of shame cross Rebecca's face before she jumped down from her bed.

  "Where are we going, Polly?" Rebecca asked, smoothing the comforter where she'd been sitting.

  "I thought we might go down to the bookstore in Boone, but since Andrew isn't here, I hate to leave him out of a trip like that. Since you two girls are shopping with Stephanie on Saturday, it doesn't make sense to do that. What do you think?"

  "Maybe we should just get lunch and go to the coffee shop. Kayla and I could put the books back on the shelves and help clean up," Rebecca said. "We can do fun things another day."

  "Is that what you want to do, Kayla?" Polly asked.

  The girl looked at Rebecca and then Polly and then back to Rebecca. "Did you and Andrew have a fight?" she asked Rebecca.

  "I don't know," Rebecca said under her breath.

  "Why would he be mad at you?" Polly asked her.

  "It's nothing. Just nothing." Rebecca pushed past Kayla and out into the living room. "Shouldn't we walk Obiwan before we go anywhere? Let's take him outside, Kayla." She patted her leg. "Come on, Obiwan. Let's go for a walk."

  Kayla ran to catch up and Polly followed them to the top of the steps. Rebecca looked back at her with more guilt as she went down the steps. Polly followed the girls outside.

  "What are you doing?" Rebecca asked as she opened the door to the back yard. "We can take him out by ourselves."

  "I know you can, but I want more information about what happened with Andrew that he might be mad at you."

  "I didn't do anything," Rebecca muttered as she followed the dog.

  Kayla ran on ahead, trying to get Obiwan to chase her. He gladly obeyed and Polly caught up to Rebecca and put her hand out to catch the girl's shoulder.

  "What's up, Rebecca? Andrew turned into a bear last night and is sulking at home today. Did he do or say something to you?"

  Rebecca shrugged her off. "It wasn't any big deal."

  Polly reached out again and stopped Rebecca, then stepped in front of her. "It might not be a big deal, but you're not telling me what's going on and Andrew isn't happy. Tell me. Now."

  "He asked me to be his girlfriend this year," Rebecca said, her eyes dropping.

  "And you said?"

  "I said no. I didn't want a boyfriend."

  "Did you two talk about why you didn't want a boyfriend?"

  "No, he just left. Kayla was there and I think he was embarrassed. We were just talking and he blurted it out. It wasn't romantic or sweet or anything. He didn't even ask. He just told me we should be boyfriend and girlfriend because we're always together and everybody thinks we are anyway."

  "What brought all of this on?"

  The dances at school. You know we're in junior high, don't you?" Rebecca asked, as if Polly was a complete dolt.

  "Yes, Rebecca. Yes I do." Polly said. She sat down on the arm of one of the Adirondacks. "Were you three talking about the dances?"

  "There's one that first Friday."

  "I know. The schedule was sent out a couple of weeks ago."

  "Andrew thinks we should be dating so we have someone to dance with."

  "What did he think Kayla would do?"

  "That's what I said," Rebecca responded. "And he got all hot and bothered. And then he quit talking to us."

  "Do you think you hurt his feelings?"

  "What about mine? The only reason he wants a girlfriend was so he'd have someone to take to the dance. He could have just asked me to the dance."

  "He doesn't have any experience with this stuff. How do you expect him to learn if you won't tell him what you want?"

  "I don't know what I want," Rebecca said, throwing her arms in the air. "What if there is somebody new at school and I want to go out with him? Or what if some of the other boys are interested in me and want to ask me to dance? Am I supposed to be tied down to Andrew just because we've always been friends?"

  "Uh, wow," Polly said. "I think you're getting a little ahead of yourself." She looked for Kayla and found her with Obiwan down by the pasture. Daisy and Nat were at the fence looking for attention. They had a few more minutes.

  Rebecca sat down on an Adirondack. "I probably am. But he just assumed I was going to be his girlfriend. He could have asked."

  "And you just said no and didn't explain any of this to him?"

  "He should just know."

  Polly slid down into the seat of the chair and smiled at Rebecca. "That's not fair and you know it. Don't get me wrong. I understand. I blow things out of proportion with Henry all the time. I explode and say stupid things and get mad at him because he doesn't know what's going on up in my head. But even still, it's not fair. I have to apologize and then we talk about it. Henry usually has a good reason for doing things. But if I just get mad and don't talk to him, we never fix anything. Do you want to be friends with Andrew?"

  "He's my best friend," Rebecca said.

  "And you want it to stay that wa
y?"

  "Of course I do. He's been there through everything." Rebecca looked up. "I wouldn't mind being his girlfriend. I just wish he would have asked me when we were alone. Maybe give me a flower or do something nice."

  "Here's the deal," Polly said. "You're too young to be girlfriend and boyfriend. I thought that going steady was the thing to do when I was in junior high, but seriously, you're too young. Neither Sylvie nor I want you to make that kind of commitment to each other right now. You need to talk to Andrew. If you want to tell him that I won't let you, that's perfectly fine. But you need to tell him what you expect. If he's going to ask you to the dance, he needs to ask you. Don't be mad at him because he doesn't understand your rules, okay?"

  Rebecca drew in a deep breath and then slowly let it out. "How am I supposed to talk to him if he's not here?"

  "Let me work on that. I'll talk to Sylvie..."

  "No! You can't tell her. That's embarrassing. He doesn't want her to know about this."

  "Whether he wants her to know or not isn't the deal right now. He was rotten to her last night and she needs to know why. I'll see if we can't break him out of his house today. He can help you and Kayla at the coffee shop and we'll make a quick run to Boone this afternoon. How does that sound?"

  "It sounds good."

  "You go get Kayla and I'll talk to Sylvie. And Rebecca?" Polly asked.

  "Yeah?"

  "I need to tell you something that my Dad and Mary told me when I was about your age."

  "What's that?"

  "I'm totally serious now," Polly said. "You can always use me and Henry as an excuse. If you think you're being pressured into doing something or going somewhere that you don't want, tell whomever you're with that we won't let you. We'll always back you up. We just want you to be safe and stay out of trouble. Does that make sense?"

  "I guess so," Rebecca said.

  "It might not seem like a big deal right now," Polly said. But someday you will remember this and be glad that you can use us. Okay?"

  "Yeah."

  "Go get Kayla and Obiwan. I'll meet you in the truck."