Hakan/Séverin

by Alexandra Ivy

  “Okay, that’s enough,” Ashe hissed in a fiery whisper. “If either one of you wake this baby, you’re going to have to deal with me.”

  Baby?

  Cub.

  Oh, yes, he had heard of the little one being born. A miracle, she was called by the Pantera. And perhaps she was. Séverin knew nothing of that. Cared nothing for that. The goal of creating new life, a new species, had been his daily nightmare before escaping and coming to the Wildlands. Needles and blood, endless samples of his piss and semen…

  But though he didn’t care for creating the kind of life that lay in the female’s arms, he cared even less for frightening it. He drew back, sheathed his claws and sat.

  For several long moments, Raphael paced in front of his female. No doubt deciding if he trusted Séverin. But with one look from the woman he shifted back into human form, into his fancy clothes and faced Séverin.

  “What the hell are you doing, bursting in here?” Raphael demanded. “The woman—Taylor—is already living in fear! Goddess only knows what more damage you did, keeping her caged in your fucking treehouse—”

  “Raph,” Ashe uttered in warning as Séverin’s lip curled.

  He looked at her and nodded. “Of course. I’m sorry, ma chère. I won’t curse in front of our cub.”

  “It’s not the cursing,” she said. “Soyala doesn’t have a clue about that yet, and frankly with this pack she might have to get used to it. It’s the yelling.”

  “I wasn’t afraid,” Taylor burst out. “And I wasn’t caged.”

  Séverin turned his gaze on her. She was looking at him too, her green eyes as soft as a caress.

  “In fact,” she added. “I haven’t felt that safe in a long time.” She smiled shyly at him. “Even waking up next to all the naked male flesh.”

  A rumble of pleasure moved through Séverin’s chest. No, she didn’t fear him.

  “What did you say?” Raphael asked her. “You saw him naked?”

  Taylor’s cheeks flushed. It was beautiful, the rush of blood to her skin, Séverin thought. It made her eyes bright, like emeralds in the sun.

  “Nothing happened,” she stumbled on, turning her attention back to the Suit. “It’s just how he was when I woke up. Not in his cat form anymore. I’m sure that’s normal.” She looked at Ashe for clarification. “Right?”

  “No,” the woman said. “That’s impossible, Taylor.”

  “What do you mean?”

  “Séverin hasn’t been out of his puma form since he came to the Wildlands a decade ago,” Raphael said. His gaze flickered Séverin’s way. “None of us know where he came from or what happened to him before he got here. None of us know what he looks like, what he sounds like. In fact, we don’t even know his real name. Or if he had one. The elders gave him—”

  “Séverin,” she uttered, turning to look at him.

  Confusion.

  But softness.

  She wants to know more.

  She wants to know everything.

  But can I give her that?

  Trust her with that?

  A human.

  His fur bristled at the idea as Raphael explained, “Because it sounds like ‘save.’ To the elders, he was saved.”

  Taylor stared at him for long seconds, her eyes running over his cat’s face. Then she spoke softly, but clearly. “He has silver eyes, like the puma—but with flecks of pale blue. Like the sky just before dawn. And long hair. Not as long as yours, Raphael, but thick like yours and the color of caramel. He’s tall, with the body of a marble statue. And when he allows himself to smile, it’s like the whole world lights up.”

  The room grew very quiet at her description, and Séverin felt strange inside his muscles and blood.

  Her words.

  How she saw me as a male.

  My eyes? My smile?

  Had I smiled?

  I barely know what a smile is. And yet I smiled at her?

  “Séverin,” Raphael began, breaking into his thoughts. “If you showed yourself to her, would you do the same with us? Let us know you?”

  The question was like a punch to the gut. So many years in his nest, wishing, wondering if he could shed his fur and allow the male inside him a little freedom. The fear of being that vulnerable made Séverin turn and give the Suit a hard look. Whatever had happened this morning, it was an anomaly. Waking up beside Taylor in his male form—feeling the hungers of a male, the desires. It wasn’t a change he had made consciously. He shook his massive head.

  No.

  Raphael sighed. “It’s a prison you choose to live in, brother. In your mind and heart. We pose no threat to you. We only want you to be part of the community, know your family, your kind. Come to the clinic, let the Nurturers help you. Let them draw you out of your cat.”

  Séverin gave the male a snarl of defiance.

  Never.

  Never go back to the clinic.

  I am free.

  “Stubborn.” Raphael gave him a pointed look. “We can’t have you hijacking humans. No matter if they believe themselves safe in your company.”

  Séverin had had enough. He was growing more and more uneasy here, in town, under many watchful, curious eyes. He needed the air, the space, his nest.

  And her.

  He padded over to Taylor and began to rub his head and muzzle against her side. Then he opened his jaws and closed them gently around her hand. She pulled in a breath, but didn’t resist him.

  “Shit,” Raphael uttered behind them. “He marked her.”

  “You’re going to have a hard time forcing her to leave now, mon chèr,” Ashe remarked dryly.

  “Taylor?” Raphael asked.

  She glanced up at him.

  “That clinic you said burned down? Was it called The Haymore Center?”

  Her mouth dropped open. “How did you know that?”

  Sighing, Raphael turned to his mate, a look passing between them. “She’s not going anywhere.”

  CHAPTER 4

  The trip back into the bayou was very different than the trip Taylor had taken into town several hours earlier. The latter had been on foot, and she’d been scared and worried and guilty about leaving the male who’d helped her. Now, with the sun bright and warm overhead, relief and excitement coursed through her. And her manner of transport? The strong, muscular, fur-lined back of a very beautiful, very fast puma.

  Her pulse jumped as he raced through the thick, wet undergrowth, dodging bushes and cypress. She leaned in further, tightening her grip around his neck. He made a sound, something hungry, yet contented in his throat, and quickened his pace. Thoughts and questions zinged through Taylor’s mind. Was this real? Was she passed out somewhere? Dreaming this? Not only had she made it to the Wildlands—but she was being hosted, for lack of a better word, by the one being her heart seemed to trust. Maybe because he was like her. Running…hiding, from a past etched with pain.

  “Thank you.” She whispered the words in his ear. Two words that encompassed so much.

  He growled back at her and sped up.

  Granted, she didn’t know what was going to happen from here. Raphael had allowed her to stay because he believed she might have some information about The Haymore Center. Which was baffling. Why would the Pantera be interested in a random fertility Regardless, Taylor was pretty sure she was going to disappoint him. And when she did…he might make her leave. But for now, she and Séverin were going back to the treehouse. And for the first time in so long—in her heart and her guts—she felt safe. With him, she was safe.

  Séverin slowed his pace, coming into the familiar stand of cypress. He stopped before the door in his tree and allowed her to get off. When she did, he turned to face her.

  “Home sweet home?” she asked with a little laugh.

  He nodded, his gaze intense.

  “You’re sure you’re okay with this?” she asked. Though she was grateful to be there, she still felt slightly like a burden.

  For a brief moment, Séverin just stared
at her. Things happened within Taylor under the intense study of those silver eyes. Warm belly, warm heart, and a strange awareness south of her navel that was quite new and worrisome. He was a puma, and yet he was a male too. It was strange to reconcile this within herself.

  He moved toward her then, and very much like the housecats she’d known in her life, started rubbing himself against her. Against her left side, then her right. His shoulder to his hip.

  Was this his way of answering her? Yes, he wanted her there. A smile broke on her lips and she laughed. He stopped and looked at her—and Taylor would’ve sworn the puma smiled as well.

  Over the next couple of hours, Séverin showed her where the fresh water stream was located and where dry firewood could be collected. She was starving by the time they returned to the treehouse.

  “I used to go camping with my teacher and her family, so I know how to build a fire.” Her brows descended. “I’m guessing you eat your food raw, though…”

  Séverin didn’t answer. In fact, he wasn’t looking at her at all. He was scenting the air. He’d caught a whiff of something. But instead of growling or assuming a predatory or defensive stance, he released a heavy breath.

  Something was coming through the brush. Taylor looked passed him and saw that it was Ashe. Hiking very capably through the wetlands. She looked like she knew her way around. Even had a large pack on her back. What was she doing here?

  She waved when she saw them. “Thought I’d get my cardio in and bring you a few things at the same time,” she announced.

  As she sidled up to them, Séverin acknowledged her with a nod, his eyes slightly narrowed with suspicion. Then he turned and took off into the trees.

  “Going hunting?” Ashe asked her.

  “I hope so,” Taylor replied with a grin.

  The woman dropped the pack on the ground, then stood with her hands on her hips and surveyed the landscape for a good thirty seconds before declaring, “Okay, you can’t do this.”

  Taylor laughed. “Of course I can.”

  “Come, on. Look at this place.” Ashe pointed to the cypress. “It’s a hole in a tree. You’re not a rabbit.”

  “I love it.”

  Ashe grimaced. “Why?”

  “It’s got everything I need, I assure you.”

  She sighed. “Fine. I know better than to argue with a woman smitten with a Pantera.”

  “I’m not smitten,” Taylor returned quickly. Though something in her gut was telling her otherwise.

  “Mmmhmm.” Ashe picked up the backpack and headed for the door in the tree. “Well, everything you need plus a few essentials.”

  “You didn’t have to do this,” Taylor said, following.

  “Yes I did,” she returned, gazing around the small interior. “Good Goddess, it’s smaller than a studio apartment. Where are you going to shower or go to the bathroom?”

  “It’s not forever. It’s for now. It feels good here, with him.” Is this smitten? “Look, I know this all seems crazy. First the running away from the ex, then running into Séverin and wanting to stay here with him.” Her gaze lifted and locked with her new friend. “It’s just, for so long I was going against my gut, you know? It feels good to follow it this time. Feels right.”

  Ashe nodded, smiled. “I understand.” Her smile widened. “Better than you can know, actually.” Impulsively, she reached out and hugged Taylor. “I’m glad you’re staying. I love what we’re building here. Us human girls.” She laughed. “I didn’t come to all of this with many friends either.”

  “Well, I owe this respite to you,” Taylor said. “Your mate obviously can’t say no to you.”

  “It’s how the Pantera males are. Rough and predatory and stubborn. But to their mates, they’re kittens. Ready to lick and play and please.” She wiggled her eyebrows.

  “Maybe I’ll find that out.”

  Ashe snorted. “No maybe about it…”

  That strange heat, that awareness was back. Running laps inside Taylor’s belly.

  “Okay, okay, settle in. I’m going. I need to feed the cub in an hour.” She headed out of the treehouse den and into the light of the early afternoon. “But remember, we’re expecting you for dinner tonight. Some great people for you to meet. My sister’s going to be there, too.”

  “How fun. I’ll be there. And Ashe?”

  “Yeah?”

  “Thank you. For the quick, uncomplicated friendship, and whatever’s in that pack.”

  Ashe grinned as Séverin appeared in the trees. “You’re welcome.”

  The puma trotted up to Taylor, something furry and dead in his teeth. She stared as he promptly dropped it at her feet. For a few seconds, she let the grossness of the act wash over her, then she laughed.

  “So charming,” Ashe remarked. She turned to Séverin. “Make sure you escort your guest to my house at seven.”

  He snorted at her halfheartedly.

  “I’ll take that as a ‘yes, ma’am.’” She gave Taylor a wave, then headed off toward town.

  With a deep breath, Taylor turned around and faced her puma. No…not her puma. The puma. Ashe’s observation had really done a number on her brain. “I could cook some of what you brought for us,” she said, bracing herself for a quick lesson in skinning a bayou critter. “Just give me a few minutes to start a fire.”

  But she only got a couple of feet before Séverin did that mouth around her hand thing. He was so gentle, she barely felt his teeth. When she turned, he motioned for her to climb on his back—just like he had when they’d left town.

  “We’re going somewhere?” she asked.

  He nodded, his eyes warm, liquid silver.

  Her heart leapt into her throat as she climbed onto his back and wrapped her arms around his soft, strong neck. With a howl to the air, he took off down the shoreline of the bayou. Water kicked up, splashing her and she laughed. Was this how she would live? For a short time, anyway? Racing through the beautiful Wildlands? Campfires at night. The puma curled up against her side as she slept. God…knowing she could sleep in peace and not with one eye open?

  Séverin slowed and padded up a small incline. The other side looked to be a very remote spot along the bayou. There on a large patch of clean, dry moss was a picnic set-up. Taylor sat up and slid off his back. She stared. A red blanket was spread out on the green, a picnic basket in the center, a plate on either side.

  Séverin came up alongside her and she turned to look at him. “Did you do this?” Then amended, “With some help?”

  He nodded.

  Her smile was so wide it made her face ache. “It’s beautiful. Thank you.”

  He rubbed himself against her side, then went over to the blanket and sat down. The golden cat on the red fabric, a male’s silver eyes…

  “When I was a child,” she said, joining him on the blanket. “I used to love coming to the bayous. My mom and dad would surprise me sometimes. Pick me up from school and away we’d go.” She opened the basket and started taking things out: bread, chicken, fruit, water… “Being here makes me miss them. But in the best way, you know?”

  He stared at her, but there was understanding, empathy behind those silver eyes.

  “Do you have family, Séverin?” she asked, popping a grape in her mouth.

  He nodded.

  “Do they know you’re here? Do you see them?”

  He shook his head, and his nostrils flared slightly.

  “Do you want to?” she pressed gently.

  He didn’t answer right away. His expression changed. From relaxed to pained. After a moment, he nodded.

  “We’re a lot alike, you and I.” She tore off two pieces of bread. One she placed between his paws, and the other she kept for herself. “Both hiding. Both wanting to protect ourselves against something painful. Both wanting to be free.”

  His eyes were piercing as they looked into hers.

  “Both accepting each other for who and what we are at this moment,” she added.

  Séverin leaned tow
ard her and nuzzled her foot. So warm, a little wet. Her belly clenched. God. To anyone on the outside looking in, what she was doing and allowing and basking in, it was crazy. But she didn’t care. The outside world had offered her a different crazy—one that had nearly destroyed her.

  She sighed and ate her bread and a few slices of salty cheese. “It’s beautiful out here. I see why you’re drawn to it. The colors and the air and sounds. Although, it is a little hot today,” she added with a laugh.

  Séverin pulled up and gave her a wry look.

  “What?” she said, grinning.

  He turned and padded down to the water’s edge. Taylor wiped her mouth and hands with a napkin and stood up. He glanced over his shoulder and growled softly at her.

  “What are you thinking?” she said.

  In answer, he dove into the bayou with a heady splash. Taylor gasped. Not from fear, but from the suddenness of it all. She scanned the surface, and when he came up she laughed.

  “But cats don’t swim!” she called out.

  He dropped his head back and roared as if to say This one does!

  She couldn’t believe him. He looked totally at ease as he waited there, expectantly. Waited… Oh, no…

  “You can’t be serious,” she called.

  The puma cocked his head to the side and splashed the water with one enormous paw.

  “I didn’t bring a bathing suit,” she said.

  A low sound made its way across the water at her. He didn’t give a shit. He wanted her to come in, join him—swim with the kitty cat.

  He dove down once again and surfaced with an impatient snarl, his silver eyes sparkling against the sunlight off the water.

  “Can’t believe this,” she muttered as she unbuttoned her jeans and slipped them off. Her tank, too. She kept her bra and panties on, of course.

  When she walked toward the edge of the bayou, she felt his eyes on her. She wondered what he thought, what he saw. As the puma, and as the male. Then she was gasping. The water was shockingly cold. Without thinking, she followed suit and dove beneath the surface. When she came up, she cursed, then laughed.

  “This is crazy! We are crazy!” She turned around to face him. “And I’ve never felt so happy. How is that possible?”