Dreamspinner Press Years One & Two Greatest Hits

by J. M. Colail

  Lucas pursed his lips. “I think your secretary is on our side, but I’m not so sure about Mark. Of course I don’t know him the way you do.”

  Jack quickly kissed his lover. “Don’t worry so much.” He traced the lines on Lucas’s forehead. “You’re cuter when you smile.”

  Chapter Fifteen

  ON AN occasion where several US Ambassadors would be meeting together, the host Embassy would usually provide them with accommodation. However, this time the Paris Embassy was undergoing extensive renovations, so the guests were kindly offered hotel rooms.

  As Jack and Lucas compared keycards on the way to their respective rooms, they realized they were not only located on the same floor, but also seemed to be in adjoining rooms. As they entered their suites, it got even better when they noticed the connecting door.

  “This can only be Gertje’s doing, right?” Lucas asked.

  “Well, I don’t see the embassy personnel here coming up with the idea to let the Ambassador and the UK representative practically share a room. I’m sure she called the hotel in her perfect French as soon as she found out where they were going to put us, just to relay ‘her’ Ambassador’s precise needs. Too bad we’ll hardly be here.” Jack obviously regretted that this was going to be a working weekend.

  Lucas noticed Jack looked tired and worn out. After he hung up his spare suit and shirts, he walked over to Jack’s room in time to catch him popping two little white pills in his mouth and swallowing them dry.

  “You should really drink something with those, Jack,” he offered as he walked over to the mini bar and grabbed a bottle of Evian. “You’re not feeling well?”

  Jack shrugged. “Just tired, I guess. Might be coming down with a cold or something. I have the mother of all headaches.”

  Lucas moved a little closer and wrapped his arms around his lover. “You could call and ask them to start the informal talks tomorrow morning?”

  “Naah, the sooner we get our cards on the table, the easier it will be to talk to the powers-that-be tomorrow afternoon. These talks always take longer than you think and if they do go smoothly, well, we can sleep in tomorrow.” Jack gave his young lover a teasing look, but it didn’t keep Lucas’s worries at bay. There was definitely something wrong and this was certainly not the weekend to get sick.

  Within minutes, they were in their work suits and out the door to a car waiting to take them to the US Embassy.

  As Jack had predicted, the talks were difficult. Each Ambassador had his own reasons for preferring one tactic over the other to persuade their respective governments to change their minds. At one point, Lucas suggested that maybe they should try talking to their own host countries separately, but this was met by a very clear “you are too young and inexperienced to understand this” look from four of the people around the table.

  When Lucas looked at Jack for support, he saw the American clearly struggling. He was sweaty and pale and his eyes were red and dull.

  At one a.m., it was decided that they should all get some rest and resume their talks at nine in the morning. As Jack got up from his chair, Lucas noticed him swaying a bit and he grabbed his arm to keep him steady.

  “You okay?” he whispered, a concerned look on his face.

  Jack quickly recovered and pulled his arm free as soon as he noticed some of the other ambassadors looking their way. “I’m fine,” he croaked, his voice a little thick and unsteady.

  Lucas worried all the way back to the hotel and then some more as they walked into Jack’s room and the American wouldn’t let him stay.

  “Go to your own room, Lucas. It’s a short night and I’ll only keep you awake.”

  Lucas didn’t know how he was going to persuade Jack to let him stay. “I want to take care of you, Jack. Please don’t push me away? I’m worried, you’re obviously sick.”

  Lucas’s plea was met by a stern gaze from Jack. “Lucas, I’m fine, I just need to sleep, because I feel like my brain is fighting its way out of my skull right now.”

  Lucas sighed and admitted defeat, but he was not about to give up completely.

  He got into his own bed and lay there listening to the sounds in the next room.

  Some time later he woke up hearing a low thump and a muffled curse. Lucas didn’t want to get up right away but when he heard Jack cough and then the sound of glass breaking, he decided he’d better have a look. He knew better than to turn on any lights, fearing this would aggravate Jack’s headache, but he made his way over to the bathroom where he could just discern the American leaning against the side of the door.

  “Don’t come any closer. There’s glass everywhere.” Jack’s voice sounded low and hoarse.

  Lucas stopped in his tracks, realizing he was barefoot. “Is it okay if I turn on some lights then?

  A grunt was all he got for an answer, but he backed up anyway and turned on the light in his own room, hoping that it would provide enough visibility without making Jack’s headache any worse. He also slipped his shoes on so that he wouldn’t cut his feet.

  When he looked up he saw Jack still leaning against the doorpost, his eyes pinched shut and his face turned away. He heard the glass shards crackle underneath his shoes as he walked over them.

  “Stay there, Jack, I’ll get you your shoes.”

  The American pushed him away. “Just go, Lucas. Just”—he was making pushing gestures with his hands—“leave me alone.”

  Lucas, not easily put off, made his voice calm and soothing. “Just let me get you to bed in one piece. I’ll clean up the glass and then let you sleep. What were you doing here anyway?”

  Jack, his eyes still closed, gave an aggravated sigh. “Getting a fucking drink of water, what does it look like?” He flinched as the loudness of his own voice echoed in the small bathroom.

  “Fine, I’ll get you a drink of water, but just let me help you get to….”

  “Just get the fuck out of here; you’re not my fucking wife. I don’t need a fucking baby sitter!”

  Lucas inhaled deeply, trying to keep his own emotions under control as he moved across the dimly lit room to where Jack’s shoes were. Even though he didn’t exactly like being compared to Maria, he tried to stay calm, figuring he would be pissed off as well if he were this sick. When he returned to Jack, he cleared his throat before he spoke, so his voice would sound soft but firm. “Listen. Your shoes are right in front of you. I’m sure you are not stubborn enough to walk barefoot across broken glass.”

  He moved to his own room to get a clean glass and some water and when he got back Jack was sitting on the bed, his head in his hands, but wearing his shoes.

  Lucas handed the older man the glass. “Drink up and I’ll fill it up again for later.”

  Jack drank the water greedily, some of it running down the side of his jaw, but he refused to give the glass back.

  Lucas frowned at how Jack was acting. “Well, if you want to be an idiot and hurt yourself again when you wake up thirsty in an hour’s time, fine, see if I care!”

  With that Lucas stormed out of the room, back to his own.

  The next morning the connecting door was locked. Lucas slumped back down on his bed and sighed. This was the “in sickness and in health”’ bit of the relationship, wasn’t it? Maybe this was it with them, maybe this was Jack telling him that he was just a good shag and when shagging was out of the question, that he wasn’t needed. Lucas was still worried about the American though, so he got up and knocked on the connecting door.

  “Jack? Jack, please let me in?” He sighed when he didn’t get an answer. “At least tell me you’re awake and you’re okay?”

  Still no answer.

  He thought about forcing open the door, but then realized he was probably overreacting. Jack was most likely already at breakfast downstairs.

  He didn’t see his lover again until he arrived in the lobby to wait for the driver. Jack looked like he hadn’t slept at all and he was suppressing a cough.

  “You okay?” Lucas hesitantly
offered.

  “Yeah, I’ll live,” Jack stated blankly. The car ride was spent in uncomfortable silence, Lucas wondering what was going on in Jack’s head. Was Jack just sick and tired or was he tired of him? Was this affair they were having becoming too much? He decided to leave it be, knowing full well they could only discuss it in the privacy of their room.

  The talks with the other ambassadors seemed a little easier this morning, with most of them having had a relatively good night’s rest, so they were soon thoroughly prepared for the meeting with the leaders of the countries that resisted joining the Americans and Brits in their “Alliance.” Lucas was impressed with Jack’s resilience. He knew exactly how little the man had slept, how sick he was, but the American was focused and to the point.

  As usual the talks weren’t conducted with the countries’ leaders but with their “lesser” representatives, the deputy foreign ministers and later the foreign ministers themselves, but progress was non-existent. It kept boiling down to the same thing. America was too pushy, had acted irrationally during the invasion and was now asking for help in restoring peace to a country they had plummeted into turmoil. The representatives of Belgium, France and Germany were not prepared to send troops into a country where the chance of casualties was high to help solve a problem that was, in their eyes, caused by the arrogance of America assuming a role as the police force of the world.

  Lucas was already good enough at reading Jack’s body language to know that he agreed with that viewpoint and that this was making Jack’s job all the more difficult. He also noticed Jack was starting to have problems focusing, but knew better than to intervene. The American’s eyes became more bloodshot by the minute and he looked pale and sweaty once more as things finally began to wrap up.

  The Belgian Prime Minister, German Bundeskanzler and French President were brought in at the last minute to finalize the talks.

  Jack, having the seats of the European Union and NATO in “his” country, was given the last word on behalf of the ambassadors. His voice was strained and thick, but like the consummate professional he was, he also sounded in control and calm and Lucas wondered if he was the only one who realized just how sick Jack was. The American talked about the necessity of showing a united front, of how these three countries not only weakened the stance of the western nations against the Islamic fundamentalism that was taking over the world, but also weakened the European Union.

  It was no use, as was expected.

  As Jack got up from the table to shake hands with his counterparts, Lucas could see him flinch but quickly recover. It wasn’t until the political leaders had left the room, and it was just the six US Ambassadors and UK Foreign Officials again that Jack literally collapsed. Lucas was on the other side of the conference table when he saw the American turn grey. The Ambassador to Germany was quick enough with a chair to prevent him from falling down after Jack knocked against him. “Well, it seems they left just in time,” the portly American chuckled. “Christensen here doesn’t seem to take defeat very easily,” he added to their host.

  Lucas was quick to come around the table and squat down in front of Jack, studying his pale face. “Can’t you see he’s sick? Call a doctor, please.” The Ambassador to France raised an eyebrow and called over one of his assistants.

  Jack raised his hand. “No, no doctor.”

  Lucas put his hands on his lover’s knees. “Jack, please, you’re clearly sick, you need….”

  Jack shook his head. “I have a cold, maybe the flu, nothing worse than that. Let’s go back to the hotel so I can sleep.”

  A tall young man with a heavy French accent leaned over the two of them. “Your car will be here shortly, sirs.”

  Lucas noticed the raised eyebrows and unsure looks in the other men’s eyes as he helped Jack up from his chair and put his arm around his shoulder.

  ONCE INSIDE the hotel room, Lucas helped Jack out of his suit jacket. As he put his hand on his lover’s back he realized Jack’s shirt was soaking wet. “Jack, you’re burning up, let me help you.”

  Jack was too exhausted to struggle and let Lucas pull his shirt off him. Lucas pushed the American into the bathroom and wet a washcloth to wipe across his face, shoulders and chest, before pulling him back into the dimly lit hotel room.

  “Here, sit down,” he whispered and returned a little later with dry boxers and a fresh T-shirt. Before he helped Jack change he offered him a glass of cool water.

  “You’re not allergic to aspirin, are you?”

  Jack didn’t reply immediately.

  “Love, it’s important. It’ll help the fever go down and maybe ease the headache too, so you can sleep.”

  Jack shook his head and smiled faintly. “Aspirin’s fine. Thanks.”

  Lucas handed him two tablets. “Now take these and drink the whole glass. You need to drink, Jack, because judging from your shirt, you’ve lost a lot more fluids than that glass already.”

  Jack did as he was told and after handing his empty glass back, wanted to lie down.

  Lucas could see from Jack’s face that his whole body ached, so he helped him to settle on the bed. As Jack’s body touched the fresh sheets, Lucas saw him shiver. He quickly stripped to his boxers and T-shirt as well.

  “God, I’m cold,” Jack groaned.

  “I know, love, hold on, I’m right here.” Lucas wrapped the blanket around Jack and got into bed with him, wrapping himself around Jack as well. Slowly the shivering and chattering teeth subsided and Jack’s breathing calmed down.

  The next morning Lucas woke to the soft sound of a travel alarm. He was on his side, Jack asleep in his arms. The damp washcloth he had moistened over and over again to put on Jack’s neck until the painkillers started their work was now discarded on the floor. He smiled at the congested snoring sounds coming from his lover. At least they had gotten a few hours of sleep and Jack didn’t feel anywhere near as warm as he had during the night.

  Lucas quickly slipped out of the bed and made his way to his own bathroom.

  When he got out of the shower, he wrapped a towel around his hips and returned to Jack’s room, finding the bed empty.

  “Jack? You better?” he asked, still keeping his voice down.

  Jack was getting out of the shower as well and Lucas couldn’t help dwelling on his lover’s lean, muscled body, but his eyes stopped at Jack’s dark rimmed eyes.

  “Yeah, better. Not great yet.” Jack coughed loudly, holding on to the sink.

  “Maybe you should call a doctor when you get back home though,” Lucas suggested.

  Jack shrugged and smiled faintly. “I’ll be fine. I feel much better than last night, thanks to you.”

  Lucas moved closer and put his arm around Jack, but the American pulled away.

  After seeing Lucas’s confused face, he explained, “Don’t want to make you sick as well.”

  “You slept in my arms, Jack. If you could infect me, I’m sure the damage is done already.” Lucas sighed and let his gaze drop to the floor. “Or is it just an excuse? If you want to end this, just tell me. I can take a lot of crap, Jack, but in a relationship… a real relationship, I want honesty. I didn’t break up with Lucy to land myself in another delusional liaison.”

  “It wasn’t an excuse, Lucas. I’m sorry I pushed you away. Come here.” Jack extended his arm and motioned to Lucas to come closer. “The honesty bit is hard. I told you I needed time to tell Maria.”

  Lucas moved closer, facing the mirror and let Jack wrap his arms around him. “This isn’t about Maria, Jack, it’s about us.” Lucas’s face relaxed a bit as he took in the sight of them, semi-naked, hugging in front of the mirror. “You really look like shit, Jack.”

  “Yeah, I guess I do, but I feel better than yesterday. Not great yet, but getting there.” He coughed to stress the point.

  Lucas smiled defiantly back at him in the mirror. “Too bad… I would have enjoyed fucking you in front of this mirror.”

  Jack smiled too. “Believe me, it’s not as
much fun as you might think.”

  Lucas turned around with a teasing look on his face. “You mean, you and… Maria… in front of the mirror?”

  Jack nodded shyly, rolling his eyes.

  Lucas chuckled. “I always figured she would be a bit of a kinky woman. Now why don’t I order us some room service so we can have breakfast here before we go home, lover boy?” He kissed Jack’s forehead and gave him a tight hug before leaving the bathroom.

  Jack looked at the dark circles around his eyes. Why did he tell Lucas about what he and his wife had done in front of the mirror? And even more strangely, there wasn’t any jealousy in Lucas’s eyes when they talked about Maria. Did Lucas know she was no competition?

  He sighed. His only consolation was that he looked marginally better than he felt.

  Chapter Sixteen

  LIFE RETURNED to normal after the Paris meeting and Lucas and Jack settled into a routine. They would meet at Jack’s office at least once a week to discuss all kind of work related business and managed to keep their passion for after hours, when they would make love at Lucas’s apartment before Jack went home to Maria.

  Jack hadn’t told Maria anything yet, though, and Lucas didn’t push the issue. Their professional lives were going well and they were fairly secure in their feelings for each other.

  THE AMERICAN National Security Advisor was scheduled to spend exactly twenty-two hours on Belgian soil to address the European Union, so Maria had been kept busy organizing the social part of the visit. A buffet lunch would be held at the embassy after an official welcome at the airport, requiring Maria to spend several hours a day at the Embassy.

  Gertje walked into Jack’s office with the security details of the visit for him to sign.

  “I’ll be glad when this whole visit thing is over,” she sighed.

  Jack chuckled “So Maria will be out of your hair?”

  “What would make you say such a thing?” she asked, feigning innocence.