Winter of Discontent (Four Seasons Book 1)

by T. S. Harvey

  Thankfully, Jess had slept through everything. I sat on the end of her bed for a while, watching her sleep. She was a nice woman. What we were doing with her was wrong. I couldn’t justify it but I had to do it. I told myself I’d look after her. She would never want for anything; I would never mistreat her, leave her short of money. She would never be unhappy. At least, that’s what I told myself. The fact was, though, everything she believed about me, about my family, was a lie. We didn’t have a history – it was just a memory trail that Jared had laid down that morning in Ontario. She was in the right place at the right time – at least, for us she was. I would see to it she had everything she wanted; everything except love. No matter how bad I felt about what we were doing, I could never give her that.

  Chapter Twenty-two – Revenge

  Sarah

  The Thanksgiving parade went really well. Kacey and the rest of the volunteers had made a great job of the school float and the costumes looked fabulous. I’d helped out with some of the decorations and managed to avoid getting roped in to dressing up as one of the characters on the float. I loved to watch anyone who enjoyed that sort of thing but never felt the desire to be the centre of attention myself. I never wanted to get left out of things, mind you. I wanted to be a team player but never wanted to be the quarterback.

  Kacey, on the other hand, had bagged herself top billing as head pilgrim-mother. Her costume was supposed to be a simple black and white number. Kacey however had other ideas. Once the float had set off and the teachers could do nothing about it, she hoisted the costume over her head, throwing it into the crowds that lined Main Street revealing a rather short, far racier black and white number. If I said Hugh Hefner would have been impressed then you get the picture!

  The marching bands were really loud. The local schools were really competitive and the Drum Majors would practise twirling their batons for weeks on end ahead of an event. Dad loved Thanksgiving and he loved the parades. When I was a little kid being dragged around the world from school to school, he would always find time to celebrate as many US holidays as he could. The bases would hold parties for the camp kids, but Dad and I mostly lived in the community, so I missed a lot of them. I’d enjoyed joining in at school to get our float right, but standing on the roadside with my dad watching it go by was the perfect place for me. We’d gotten to Main Street early so we could get a good spot and had been waiting for a couple of hours before the first float came into view. The street was pretty packed on both sides and the tension, the excitement was mounting. The first float was from a middle school on the other side of town. They had picked The Simpsons as a theme and although that was all a bit old now it was still a good effort. Dad did a great Homer impression; he even had the bald head to go with it. He always could make me laugh and the thought of him being closer to me made me feel so much happier. By the time Monday came around again I was feeling so much better, so much more positive. Unfortunately, it was a feeling that didn’t last long.

  I caught up with Kacey and girls before school and braced myself for the inevitable questions about Erik and his new girlfriend. Brittany swore a few times – bastard this and bastard that – but on the whole, the girls were really quite supportive. The chances were Kacey, who had been really kind about the whole thing, had spoken to them about not being too hard on me. In the end I told them I was pretty cut up but that it wasn’t something I would let get me down. I hadn’t ever told a lie that big before but deep down I just hoped that if they could believe it then perhaps I might.

  The bell had just gone and we were walking across the grass when Erik arrived, driven in by ‘her’.

  ‘Don’t look, Trump. Don’t give him the satisfaction.’

  She was right, of course, but unfortunately curiosity got the better of me. Kacey had said she was a lot older than him and not as pretty as I was, but I needed to see for myself.

  ‘Is he kissing her?’ I asked quietly.

  ‘No. Well, he was, but he’s finished now. He’s walking up the path now.’

  I turned briefly toward the lot. Kacey hadn’t been entirely honest. She was older than he was by quite a bit, that much was true, but she wasn’t plain. She looked to be shorter than I was, but she was really very pretty. I turned back quickly; I didn’t want to give her, or him, the satisfaction of seeing me look.

  ‘Come on, Kace, let’s get inside.’

  I was struggling again. I thought I’d got it cracked after the weekend spent laughing and joking with Dad and Aunt Suze but now, in the cold light of day, I felt as wretched as I had when he dumped me.

  ‘We need to find you a date.’ Kacey smiled.

  I didn’t say anything. I hoped my look and the raise of one eyebrow told her that I wasn’t up for that just yet.

  First period Math wasn’t something to look forward to and when Ryan Enders came and sat on the seat behind me it got worse.

  Mr Cartwright had been talking quadratic equations for about 20 minutes when I felt a nudge in my back. Looking around I saw Enders was trying to pass me a piece of paper.

  “Forget about the geek, I’ll show you how it’s realy done,” it said.

  What a dick! I wrote quickly on the back of the paper and passed it back to him.

  “Really has two L’s and you don’t have a chance in one.”

  Clearly annoyed, he screwed up the paper and threw it at the back of my head. I just ignored him and got on with the class.

  When the bell went for next period I gathered my things, rose from my seat and, before I knew it, was picking myself up of the floor. He said it was an accident but I knew Enders had tripped me on purpose. He was pissed with my reply to his note and wanted to teach me a lesson.

  Kacey helped me to my feet as I rearranged my skirt and my dignity.

  ‘You’re an idiot, Enders, a puerile infant!’ I snapped.

  Of course, my words did nothing to wipe the smile off his face. It wasn’t until lunch that I realised I’d twisted my wrist quite badly. It was the same wrist I’d hurt when I pulled out in traffic and the memory of that didn’t help my mood. As we walked into the canteen, my mood didn’t improve.

  ‘Oh great, look who’s here,’ said Kacey, as she realised Erik was in front of us in the queue.

  I very nearly said ‘hello’, but the look on his face wasn’t encouraging; it was almost like he was looking right through me, like I didn’t exist.

  ‘Who the hell does he think he is, treating you like that?’ said Kacey in clear support. ‘You’re better off without him; anyone who dates a woman that old has to be a pervert.’

  ‘Don’t, Kacey. I know you’re only sticking up for me but this isn’t all his fault. I think I drove him away; I didn’t accept him for who he was, so he dumped me and found someone else. I just have to deal with it.’

  ‘Yeah? Well from where I’m sat, you’re not dealing with it very well,’ she said, putting her arm around my shoulder. ‘You will though. What you need is a girls’ night out.’

  I shook my head but I knew it was no use arguing. Once Kacey decided on something, it would take someone stronger than me to resist.

  The rest of the week dragged by. I only saw Erik again once, when he was late for school on the Thursday. I was looking out the window during Physics and saw his girlfriend’s car pull up in the parking lot. It was odd really. They both got out of the car, as they had when I saw them on the Monday, but this time, when she went to kiss him goodbye, he pulled away. On the Monday he had been all over her but today it was like he didn’t want to know. I found myself wondering whether they’d had a fight, or whether she’d got bad breath or something equally unattractive. I even wondered whether Monday’s ‘performance’ had been for my benefit. I shrugged that off, though. After all, he knew I hadn’t wanted to break up, so what would be the point in trying to make me jealous? You only did that if you wanted someone back, which clearly he didn’t.

  Some of the girls were going back to swim at Kacey’s after school. I’d said I would
go with them but I’d forgotten to bring my swimsuit with me. I wasn’t that bothered about going really but Kacey was working hard to take my mind off Erik so, when our Geography teacher failed to show that afternoon, I decided to cut out and go home to get it. As I walked through the corridor passed the girls’ lockers and into the foyer that led to the outside of the front of the school I noticed Erik and some of the other geeks waiting outside the Secretary’s office. I tried hard not to look in his direction but the more I tried, the more I wanted to. When I finally gave in to the urge to look, I felt a real sense of embarrassment. Nothing happened, no awkward glances or smiles, nothing. He wasn’t even looking at me; by now he had turned his back to me and was talking to one of the guys. I was embarrassed because I’d gotten myself worked up at the possibility that things weren’t going so great between him and his girlfriend and that there might still be a chance for us. I was embarrassed because I’d gotten it completely wrong. Red-cheeked and with my head down, I just walked toward the door and out of the school.

  Ever since the accident, I’d had to take the bus to and from school; this time I found myself daydreaming somewhat and before I knew it, I’d missed my stop. I was going to get off at the next one and walk back the half mile or so to home but I didn’t. Instead, and rather foolishly, I decided to do something really dumb. I stayed on the bus until it got to Erik’s stop.

  I stood staring down the lane thinking ‘this is a bad idea’. I know I should have just turned back to home but, for an intelligent girl, I can be a bit stupid and where Erik was concerned my judgement was definitely clouded.

  Mr Zauber’s car wasn’t out front and there was a strong chance that Jared would be in classes at this time of day, I knew Erik was still in school so I was pretty confident Jess would be on her own. As I walked tentatively toward the house, I had no idea what I would say if she answered the door. I was a couple of feet from the porch when I felt my courage desert me. I had turned away to go home when I heard a voice call out.

  ‘Hi there, can I help you?’

  As I faced her, I felt a rage of jealousy I hadn’t felt before. I wanted to go up and thump her, tell her to go back to Canada and to stay away from Erik, but of course I didn’t. She was smiling and she looked really friendly.

  ‘I just wondered if Jared was home,’ I said, rather meekly.

  ‘No, he’ll be a good hour yet, maybe more.’

  ‘OK, no problem, I’ll come another day.’

  ‘Don’t go. Come on in. I don’t get many visitors. Please.’

  She looked quite sad now and I started to feel guilty about the real reason I’d come round. I wasn’t here to see Jared, I was here to find out more about her, about how long she had been seeing Erik; whether he’d cheated on me with her or whether he really had fallen in love at first sight. I should have said ‘no’, I should have just smiled and walked away but I didn’t. The temptation to grill her about how things were between her and Erik after what I’d thought I’d witnessed that morning was just too strong.

  ‘OK, just for a little while though, I’m meeting friends later.’

  ‘So where do you know Jared from?’ she asked as we made our way through to the kitchen.

  ‘Oh, you know, here and there.’

  We sat chatting like old friends; the clock on the wall seemed to turn too quickly. I knew if I didn’t ask her my questions soon I might not get another chance. Jared would be back soon, as would Erik. I had to get a move on.

  ‘So tell me more about you, Jess, are you from around here?’

  By now, I was so anxious and I didn’t feel any guilt about pretending I had no idea who she was.

  ‘No, I’m from Canada. I moved back here with Erik and his family a couple of weeks back. We’re engaged to be married.’

  She looked so happy as she said this. I wanted to wipe the smile off her face. How dare she be happy about stealing him from me!

  ‘Congratulations,’ I said through gritted teeth. ‘Have you been engaged long?’

  ‘About six months. I had to work my notice and sort things out at home before I could move here.’

  ‘Six months!’ I couldn’t help the shock in my voice ‘Six months!’

  ‘Yes. Why do you look so surprised?’

  She was clearly confused by my reaction. Any decent human being would have made up a convenient lie; any decent human being would have just smiled and said ‘that’s wonderful’ or ‘right, I’d better get going’, but not me. No, I did the exact opposite of decent; I turned into a real bitch.

  ‘Well, until three weeks ago he’d been dating me for two months. I figured he’d met you when he went to Canada last month. I didn’t figure he’d been cheating on both of us.’

  ‘That’s not possible. Erik wouldn’t do that. I think I’d like you to leave now. Clearly it was Erik you were looking for, not Jared. Now get out!’

  Her eyes were welling up and she looked ready to burst into tears. Finally, at last I felt guilty. She hadn’t done anything wrong. She’d trusted him the way I had; he’d betrayed us both. The only satisfaction I got from all this was knowing that he’d find out that we knew what he’d done, that she might leave him. There was no way I’d take him back now, not if he came crawling on bended knee. I may have felt bad for how I made her feel but I felt better for knowing how Erik would feel.

  It was getting quite late as I ran down the lane toward the bus stop and I just prayed I didn’t run into either Erik or his brother. Fortunately I didn’t have long to wait for the bus and managed to be on my way before anyone came home. I sat back as the bus turned away and, to my shame, I felt really good about having gotten my own back on him. By the time I got home, Aunt Suze was back from work and she offered to drop me off at Kacey’s. I spent the next two hours splashing, jumping, and diving into the pool. I didn’t mention what I’d done to anyone. I wanted to wait and see what the fallout was first; I didn’t have too long to wait.

  Chapter Twenty-three – Resolution

  Erik

  It had only been a couple of weeks, but I knew bringing Jess back from Canada wasn’t right for me; unfortunately though, it was right for Sarah. She’d never know that, of course, but I had to keep her safe, I had to keep her away from me. I had hoped that, in time, she’d find someone else, someone totally mortal, and she could then forgive me for how she’d been treated. I know it was a touch naïve but, at barely seventeen, I was still pretty idealistic when it came to matters of the heart. I’d been so engrossed in conversation at school that morning that I didn’t sense her coming until it was too late. I saw her just briefly as she came into view. I could hear her pulse start to race as she struggled not to turn to see if I was looking. I had the advantage over her in being able to sense all she was feeling without having to see her. I took the easy route and turned my back on her before she looked around. I could feel her hurt, her disappointment, when she did. What I wanted to do was turn round and smile at her, to walk over and tell her that all that had happened was to protect her, but how could I? I could sense her trying to Whisper to me but I kept her blocked. It made me smile wryly when I thought of that. For centuries blocking someone had meant not allowing others to share silent conversation with us; today, however, it had an entirely different connotation but, in reality, the end result was the same.

  By the end of the school day, I’d started to feel really miserable. I didn’t know how long I could maintain this; how long I could stay strong and how long I could stay away from her. It would be so much easier if she could really despise me but, without doing something truly dreadful, I had no idea how to get her feeling that way.

  The first bus came but I’d dawdled so much I was at the back of the queue by the time it arrived and so didn’t get on. It was another twenty minutes before the next one arrived. This didn’t bother me, to be honest; I was in no hurry to get home.

  Jess was nice enough; in fact, she was really nice. She would have dinner ready by the time Dad got home. The house would be c
lean and tidy, washing and ironing done, and always had a smile no matter what kind of day she’d had. Jared had sorted it so that she didn’t leave the house unless it was with one of us; we didn’t want people asking questions, getting suspicious of how we’d become an item so quickly. She believed we’d been dating for months and that we were in love. She also believed that I didn’t want to commit to her fully until we were married. It was enough that I had to convince Sarah I didn’t want her; that I wanted Jess – but I couldn’t sleep with her. I hated having to show her any affection, kissing her goodbye each morning was just a sham, a way of keeping up the pretence when people were around. I felt bad that it upset her when I turned away so I’d just do a memory wipe so she’d forget. I knew it was wrong to do this, unfair, but I really didn’t care. It stopped her feeling bad and me feeling guilty. She was a nice woman and didn’t deserve all this. That was another thought that I’d have to put to the back of my mind. I would do whatever it took to keep Sarah safe and Jess was just collateral damage – cruel but necessary.

  As I walked up the lane for home, I got a sense that something wasn’t quite right but couldn’t quite put my finger on what it was. It didn’t take long to find out. I walked through the door and from the foot of the stairs I could hear crying. I didn’t want to go up and ask but figured I should, so took each step as slowly as I could. I entered her room and Jess was sat on the end of the bed, head in her hands and sobbing her heart out.

  ‘What’s wrong?’ I said, trying to sound as caring as I could.

  She didn’t respond immediately – she looked up at me, picked up the cup on the bedside table next to her and threw it at me.

  ‘Get out! You lied to me!’ she screamed.

  I should have tried to calm her down. To find out what she meant, but I didn’t. I really didn’t care. I was hungry, had a ton of homework, and wanted to get started on it. So, instead of doing the right thing, I left her to her tears and just went back downstairs.