“You did this?” Amy asked.
“Every SEAL does this.” Placing his arm around her waist, he said, “You’re only seeing the tame parts. Those midnight wet and sandys, linked arm in arm, in the surf. Those are some times you don’t easily forget.”
“I’ll bet not many of you guys own rubber boats, either.”
Zak had to laugh at that one. “You got that right. Took me six months before I could even look at one.”
“Why do they have to yell at them so loud?”
“Trying to pick a scab, get under their skin. See how mentally tough they are. Lot of guys are strong enough physically. The mental side is the killer.”
“Bet you had it all scoped out before you went. I can see you doing that.”
Again, this was funny to Zak. “As a matter of fact, the ones who do that usually wash out the first week or two. I think there’s such a thing as overtraining. Mental overtraining is the worst.”
She turned in his arms. In the warm space between them, she asked, “Why?”
Zak pulled her hair back behind her ears and off her forehead. “Because, darlin’, there always comes a low day. One of those days that you doubt yourself. You have to be able to hang on long enough to get yourself and your buddy clear. If you panic, you’re dead. And you might kill someone else, too.”
The party was in full swing when Zak and Amy arrived. The light coral pink bungalow with red tiled roof had a small front yard bordered by wrought iron fencing. Several dogs were roaming the lawn area, overseen by a new guy Zak hadn’t met.
“Zak Chambers,” he said after he let himself into the yard behind Amy. “This here’s my fiancé, Amy.”
“Zak, yeah, heard about you. Jell-O. I’m Dan Welch. Just got back from language school.” The guy’s face was handsome, enhanced by white teeth and an affable smile. Zak had been worried about Amy getting jealous, but he was feeling a bit of the green monster himself.
“Nice to meet you, Amy.”
“Language school, huh? That’s cool.” Zak squeezed Amy’s shoulder. “This is Amy’s first time at a gathering.”
“Oh, they’ll be gentle on you. Nice bunch of gals in there. Can’t say much for the guys, though.”
Music hit them as soon as they opened the heavy oak door. Coop was dancing wearing a pair of fins and snorkel facemask, a small red cape from a child’s pajama set tied around his neck. The thing looked miniscule, like a napkin, hanging down the back of the six-foot-four SEAL medic. Coop’s nearly white-haired son of about four had the rest of the pajama outfit on, plus red girl’s rain boots.
“Hey, there she is!” Coop came over and shook Amy’s hand. His goggles were getting in the way so he flipped them up on his head. “I’m Coop. You must be Amy.”
Zak could feel her grip onto his fingers like a vice. He knew she was nervous as hell, but she didn’t cut and run. He introduced her to several others, including Libby Cooper, Christy Lansdowne, a very pregnant Gina, and Mia, Fredo’s wife.
“Gina’s a cop, honey. She’s married to the sniper I’m training under, Armando.”
“Understand your dad’s Chief in Santa Rosa?” Gina asked.
“Yes. Due to retire soon, I hope.”
“Oh God. Me, too, I hope,” Gina said, placing her palm against her belly.
Mia leaned over and rubbed Gina’s stomach. “For good luck.” Her dazzling smile was model perfect. “Gina is my sister-in-law. Armando is my brother. Fredo and I are working on a baby.”
Zak had heard some of the talk about Fredo and Mia trying to get pregnant and decided not to mention a thing about it.
Lucas came forward, holding his blonde daughter who was about the same age as Coop’s boy. She was squirming, giving her daddy fits. “Welcome to our family, Amy. Don’t listen to Zak here, because he lies through his teeth. You do know about the Thursday night coed strip poker sessions?”
The line was perfectly delivered, and as Amy stepped backward and blushed, Zak held her arms, bent down, and kissed her on the cheek. “You know that’s not true.”
Lucas’ girlfriend suddenly appeared, reached over, and grabbed the preschooler. “Here, let me take Lindsay so you can be introduced properly.” She smiled at Amy. “We’ll talk later. I’m Marcy, and I sell real estate, too, but down here. Or at least I used to.” She stepped away and began showing Lucas’ daughter a toy, bouncing and almost dancing with the child.
“She’s really good with her,” said Lucas. “With both my kids.” As he watched them, he turned and added, “Marcy and I are getting married, just as soon as my divorce is finaled.”
Zak noticed Lucas appeared to be bashful about this. Zak didn’t like the fact that the ugly D word had come up, but it was a reality that SEAL divorces were common. He felt Amy stiffen as he wrapped his arm tighter around her waist.
Zak caught the eye of a woman he knew from Sonoma County. Kelly Freeman had been married to his former soccer teammate, Joel. The young SEAL was severely injured in a firefight and came home nearly blind in one eye. Joel had worked very hard to be able to stay on the teams, taking sniper training and becoming the only SEAL who was reinstated after what should have been a career-ending injury. And then on his next deployment was killed in a roadside bomb attack.
Kelly was dragging someone Zak recognized as another SEAL from Team 3 behind her when she stepped up to him, wrapped her arms around him, and gave him a kiss on his cheek.
“Stan said you were on his team. I couldn’t wait to see you again.”
“Wow, Kelly.” Zak momentarily was flooded with scenes from the funeral back home, Kelly’s puffy eyes and tear-streaked cheeks. “You look amazing.” He introduced her to Amy. “I’m not sure if you guys ever met, but you remember the guy—”
Before Zak could finish, Kelly interrupted him. “Stan and I are getting married next year, Zak.” To her fiancé, she said, “He and Joel knew each other ever since they were kids.”
“What a small world it is.” Stan was a little stiff, but accepting.
“You know, Kelly, Joel is the reason I decided to become a SEAL?”
Kelly threw her head back and laughed. “You must not have talked to him after he lost his eye. He’d have discouraged you, Zak.”
“Nope. Never got to talk to him. I’m so glad to see you’ve found yourself another frog.”
She rolled her eyes. “It was a hard time, for sure, but,” she shrugged and continued, “the SEALs kind of rubbed off on me.”
“Pleased to meet you, Amy,” said Stan. The couple walked away in search of beers.
Scanning the crowd, Zak found Kyle crawling on the floor with several kids on his back, playing horse. He maneuvered both of them over to his LPO’s side.
“Whoa, partners. I’ve gotta go two-legged for a bit. Hold that thought, and we’ll get right back to it,” Kyle said in an old crusty prospector voice. The sounds of disappointed children filled the room. He stood, sweating profusely and breathing heavily. “Whew. That’s a workout. Especially now that some of the kids are getting pretty big.”
“Kyle, this is—”
“Amy. Nice to meet you, Amy.” Kyle extended his hand.
“Thanks. Zak has told me how pleased he is to serve on your team.” Amy was polite and sounded at ease.
“We do this about once a month when we’re home. The ladies do this often so the kids can grow up together and play—in some cases, learn to play nice.” Kyle winked at her. “My son, Brandon, is driving my wife nuts, and he’s the one we have to watch out for.”
“Probably in the genes.” Amy’s comment drew pink to her cheeks. She let off a nervous laugh as Kyle and Zak exchanged a knowing smile.
“Wouldn’t be the first time I’ve heard it,” answered Kyle.
All of a sudden, they heard someone yelling in a high-pitched, shrill voice. Zak’s reflex made him check his right side for a sidearm, and he cursed himself silently.
The dancing stopped. Even the kids stopped playing and watched as a blonde lady near
ly ran into Marcy, snatching the white-haired youngster from Marcy’s arms, setting her down. Her own arms were full with a squirmy toddler who was terrified. “You get your filthy hands off my daughter. You stole my husband. Now you want to take my kids, too? You bitch!”
Lucas positioned himself in front of Marcy for protection and leaned forward to soothe his daughter, who began to cry. A couple of the other guys fanned out behind the woman Zak assumed was Connie Shipley, Lucas’ soon-to-be-ex-wife. The toddler in Connie’s arms reached painfully for Lucas.
“Connie. Don’t start with this. You’re scaring the kids.” He tried to take the boy in his arms, but she turned aside. Lindsay continued to try to get to her dad.
“You bring them here to meet your fuckbunny?”
Several of the wives started to say something, but thought better of it. The men were casual, but it was clear to Zak if any harm was to come to the kids, his buddies would intervene. Connie was so insanely angry she appeared to be on drugs.
Each time Lindsay tried to go to her daddy, Connie yanked her arm back, a defiant look on her once beautiful face. Marcy retreated to the background, obviously opting to not further inflame the situation.
“Connie, you get out of this house or I’ll call the cops. You weren’t invited. Nobody wants you here. Get your shit together or I’ll stop trying to be reasonable and fight you with every fiber of my being. You have no right to endanger my kids. You leave them both here with me.” Zak had only known Lucas for a few weeks, but he’d never seen the man angry. Today, he was nearly bursting veins in his neck.
“Oh, isn’t that sweet!” Connie sneered at some of the other SEAL wives. “You little trash-talking bitches. Pretending to be my friends. How many of you screwed my husband, too?”
Kyle came up behind Connie, peeled the toddler from her arms, and handed him to Lucas. “Ma’am, you’re gonna leave right now or I will personally see to it that you are arrested. You’ve made your point. Now leave.”
Connie temporarily lost her grip on Lindsay, who ran to Lucas. The youngster buried her head in Lucas’ leg, hiding her face and her tears from her mother.
Zak heard a low level muttering of expletives from men and women alike as Connie was firmly escorted outside. Kyle and several of the Team guys stayed outside with her and did not return.
Amy wasn’t moving. Her palm was to her mouth. She was shaking.
Of all the fuckin’ parties for Connie to show up…
Again, Amy stiffened as Zak attempted to rub the back of her neck. “It’s okay, sweetheart. Sorry you had to see that.”
He tucked his thumb and forefinger under her chin, but Amy pulled away.
“I’m not a child, Zak. This isn’t a divorce. The woman is unhinged and shouldn’t be anywhere near those kids.”
“Don’t think you’d get an argument from anyone here. This has been a long time coming, apparently.” He tried to wrap her in his arms, but again, Amy pushed him away gently.
“I’m okay, Zak. Don’t do this.”
“What?”
“Shield me. Smother me. I’m a big girl.”
“I just wanted to—”
He was grateful she nearly whispered her reply. “You can’t take the ugly out of this situation. It’s sad, really sad. But please, don’t rob me of my feelings. There’s nothing you can do to take it all away. Let me process it.”
Kyle and several others didn’t come back to the party right away. The dancing had stopped, although the kids began their play again. Lindsay jumped into the little circle of SEAL kids. Lucas hung onto his son, discussing something in private with Marcy.
The women were in clusters, whispering and searching the front door for further news. At last, the crowd saw flashing lights as the police took Connie away in a patrol car. Even from inside the house, they could hear her protestations and filthy insults.
The party didn’t end anything like Zak had imagined or envisioned. He decided to give Amy the space she seemed to need and resigned himself to just wait until she wanted to talk. Whatever questions she had, he hoped he had answers for.
Chapter 4
The ride home was difficult. Amy kept searching for meaning in her jumbled stomach. The drama was painful. And it also brought back memories of the last time she felt agitated. It was during the attack at the complex in San Francisco where she worked. Perhaps what bothered her most was that Connie was part of the community.
“You know them very well, Zak?” she finally asked.
Zak had also been quiet, passively watching the road as they made their way back to his apartment. She knew he was filled with things he would never mention to her, and she was bothered by it.
“I don’t know many of them well. Carter and I have been through all the pre-workup at Great Lakes and then the BUD/S training. Lucas and the rest of the guys, even Kyle, I’m just getting to know.” He didn’t look at her when he asked his follow-up question. “Why?”
“I was wondering if she had some mental illness. Or has she always been like this?”
“I have no f—idea, Amy. This was the first time I’ve met her. But there have been stories.”
“I’ll bet.”
They drove in silence for a few minutes longer, peeling off the freeway and coming to the network of narrow streets winding up to the apartment complex. Amy wanted to ask questions, but felt Zak would be critical. She bit her lower lip, took in a deep breath, and let it out.
“That bad, huh?” he said to her.
“No. Just not what I expected.”
“So what did you expect?”
“I don’t know. Does this sort of thing happen a lot? All this drama? Wives marry other SEALs? Wives go ballistic?”
“Come here.” Zak reached over and pulled her beside him. He gave her shoulder a squeeze and then gently gave her a one-handed shoulder massage. “You have to understand something. There’s always drama. Just never comes out that way. I’ve talked about it with some of the Team guys. It isn’t all hearts and flowers, Amy. I mean—”
Zak paused, stopped caressing her shoulder and upper arm, and patted her instead.
“Usually the drama surrounds some guys, like Joel, who get injured or never come back. That’s when the community closes ranks, comes together, and helps the spouse and family. It’s just what they do. And I’ll be honest and tell you, some guys, when they go overseas, are unfaithful. There can be drama there, too. The ladies stay close to home, form this network of strength. They usually can dig it out of anyone if something’s going on. There aren’t too many secrets. All the joys and pains are shared communally.”
“Okay. I can see that.”
“But as for Connie, I think she’s just a mental case. Maybe she was, maybe she wasn’t like this when they first got together, but she did demand Lucas leave the teams, and he’s not ready to.”
“That happens a lot, too? Wives beg their husbands to get off the Teams?”
“I don’t know. Not been around it enough to really know. That’s why I wanted you to come down here to meet everyone, to talk to whomever you wanted to talk to, answer all your questions. I want you walking into this thing with your eyes wide open.”
“I think I do a pretty good job of that.”
He glanced at her face. “You do, honey. I think you have great instincts. You’re good under pressure. Remember, I’ve seen that.”
How could she forget the look on the terrorist’s face when his bloody handprint was left on the glass door of her office or later when she thought her life would end in that bomb blast?
But there was one lingering question she had to ask. “So, Zak, how often do SEALs get divorced? Is it a chronic problem?”
“What do you think?” Zak had pulled into the parking garage. Shutting the Hummer off, he turned in his seat to face her again. He focused on her hands folded neatly in her lap and gently covered them with his. His warm fingers wrapping around hers was comforting. She could see he was trying to formulate words for something difficul
t to say. He perused her chest, up her neck, and then met her face to face. “I think the statistic is better than sixty percent. That’s all military, too. Maybe the SEALs are a little higher, but I’m not sure.”
She broke eye contact and stared at the walls of the garage, swallowing hard.
“Thing is, Amy, it’s hard on the families when the guys go overseas. That stress takes several forms. I guess Connie went on a spending bender, and then they had money problems. I just think she was weak and decided she couldn’t handle it. We all wish she could have just been honest about that—she wasn’t made for this life. No harm in that. But the way she’s going about it is all wrong.”
“Terrible for the kids.”
“Tears Lucas up. It really does.”
“I won’t lie to you, Zak. I really don’t know how I’ll feel when you go overseas.”
“I know that. That’s being honest.”
“But I want to support you. I know this was what you were made to do.”
“That’s absolutely for certain. But I want to make one thing perfectly clear. My dedication to this job will always come first as long as I am a SEAL. If that changes, then I get out. You need to know that.”
It was one of the things that scared her the most. No matter how much he loved her, being a SEAL would always come first.
“And?” Amy knew there was something more he was leaving out.
“Let’s go inside.” He took her hand. She slid off the seat into his arms, and they walked hand in hand up to the elevator and to his apartment beyond.
He directed her to sit on the couch while he brought in some mineral water for both of them. Instead of taking his place beside her, he knelt in front of her. “Amy Dobson, you know me. You don’t know the community yet, but I do, and I think there is a place here for you. I’ve got the green light from your dad.”
True Blue SEALs: Zak (True Navy Blue #1) Page 11