She laughed. “I’m intellectual a lot.”
“Yes, you are.”
He rotated his arm, moving his hand up and around. Before she realized what he was doing, he’d pulled her against him, trapping the movie between them.
“You have too much free time,” he murmured. “It’s the smart thing. I read a short story years ago about a society where everyone was supposed to be equal. So the really strong guy had to walk around with a door strapped to his back.”
“Carrying around a door wouldn’t make me any less smart,” she told him, aware of his body so close to her own. Of the heat of him and how she felt as if her insides were melting. They weren’t, of course. But the sensation was pleasant.
“You’d figure out some kind of device to help carry the weight of the door,” he murmured, lowering his head just a little.
“I would think my time would be better spent overthrowing such a ridiculous government.”
“I’d help.”
He kissed her. She’d hoped he would, and now she lost herself in the feel of his warm, strong mouth on hers.
His lips teased hers, almost nibbling her sensitive skin. She parted, wanting him to deepen the kiss. He obliged, slipping his tongue inside.
She wrapped her free arm around his neck and let her body sink into his. He moved his hands up and down her back, awakening need everywhere he touched.
She was aware of blood rushing to her breasts, of how they were suddenly more sensitive. Especially her nipples. She wanted him to touch her there, to tease her with his fingers, then use his mouth to suck and lick. The image made her insides clench. Sexual hunger made her uncomfortable with its intensity.
He lifted his hands to her shoulders and gently pushed her away. She opened her eyes.
“What?” she asked, when she really meant, “Why are you stopping?”
“The, ah, movie.”
His low voice was thick and husky. She looked down and saw he was fully aroused. They could do it right here, she thought, thinking the counter height would be workable. He could—
She jumped back and sucked in a breath. The movie fell to the floor. “Carter.”
“Right.”
“I forgot.” She’d been so lost in how Gideon made her feel, she’d forgotten there was a child in the house. “I’m a horrible person. I need to be responsible and I forgot.”
Gideon adjusted the front of his jeans, then looked at her. “You kissed me. It’s not like you let him burn down the house.”
“Carter’s too responsible to burn down the house.” She slapped her hand over her mouth.
“What?” he asked.
“I imagined us having sex on the counter.”
Gideon stepped toward her. “You did?”
“We can’t do that. Not with him here. He could have walked in on us. He’s going through enough without having to deal with that visual.” She closed her eyes. “I’m not ready to be a mother.”
“Sure you are. You enjoyed kissing me. That’s not a crime.”
“I forgot.”
“For ten seconds.”
“That’s all it takes for disaster to strike.”
He lightly touched her cheek. “Don’t you think you’re being a little irrational?”
“Yes,” she admitted. “I feel guilt. I’m overcompensating to distract myself from the guilt, which makes me uncomfortable. I do know that Carter is perfectly capable of taking care of himself for several hours at a time. While having a sexual encounter in the middle of the day in an open kitchen would be wrong, our kissing wouldn’t be detrimental to him.”
His gaze was steady. “But?”
“But I still feel guilty.”
“Welcome to how the other half lives.”
“You feel guilty?” she asked, surprised.
“Everyone does. We’re not doing enough, we’re doing too much. Hell, I feel guilty for not spending more time with Carter.”
“So why don’t you spend more time with him?”
When he just looked at her instead of answering, she understood. The fear. For what was taken and what had been left. For the kind of man he’d become. For all the things he thought he couldn’t do and those he didn’t want to do. Fear bred guilt which caused Gideon to withdraw.
“I feel guilty about you, too,” he admitted.
That surprised her. “Why?”
“You’re doing so much. I really appreciate how you’ve stepped in to handle a lot of this.”
“I want to. I like him.”
“He likes you, too.”
Words that pleased her. “We should watch the movie,” she said.
Gideon shook his head. “You go ahead. I’ll catch up with you later.”
Which meant he was leaving. “Why? You were just laughing. We kissed. It was nice.”
Something flashed through his dark eyes. Whatever he was experiencing emotionally, it wasn’t pleasant.
“I’ll be out on the deck,” he told her, and then he was gone.
Felicia made her way down to the media room. Carter was reading one of Gideon’s car magazines. He looked at the Blu-ray case in her hand.
“What are we watching?” he asked.
She showed him.
He groaned. “A cartoon.”
“It’s animated. There’s a difference.”
“Can we see something with car chases and bad guys and stuff?”
Which was almost exactly what Gideon had said. “This is better.”
Carter grumbled something under his breath, but he turned on the TV and Blu-ray player and slipped the disc in place. Then he joined Felicia on the sofa as Despicable Me began.
She hadn’t been sure she would enjoy the animated feature very much. Sometimes children’s movies were too simplistic for her tastes. But the story of a man inadvertently discovering what it means to love and to create a family touched her more than she expected.
Partway through, she paused the movie to go get the brownies she’d baked earlier. Carter followed her up to the kitchen.
“Gideon left?” he asked.
“He’s outside. He needs to be alone right now. He’ll come back before his shift at the radio station.” She paused, wanting to say Gideon wasn’t avoiding him on purpose, only he was. She didn’t like lying and felt it served no purpose. Carter would easily guess the truth.
She put brownies onto a plate. “Do you want a glass of milk?” she asked.
“I’ll get it.”
While he poured milk for himself, she put ice in a glass and then filled it with tea. They carried everything back down to the media room.
They sat next to each other on the sectional. Carter reached for the remote, but instead of resuming the movie, he turned to her.
“Why don’t you have kids?” he asked.
The question surprised her. “I haven’t been in a serious relationship,” she admitted. “I understand that it’s not technically necessary to be married to have a child, but I had hoped to follow that traditional path.”
“Had hoped?”
“I still want to fall in love and get married.” She nodded as an unexpected truth made itself known. “Either way, I want to have children. I want a family.”
“You’ll be a good mom,” Carter told her.
She was less sure. “I don’t know very much about raising a child. I don’t have the advantage of having learned things from my own parents.”
He reached for a brownie. “You have good instincts. You remind me of my mom, a little. She told me how things were. She didn’t lie ’cause I was a kid. We were a team, you know? You’d be like that.”
Felicia swallowed, her throat tight. “Thank you for the compliment. It’s very meaningful.”
He shrugged. “Having me show up like I did wasn’t easy. But you’ve been right here the whole time. Not everyone would have done that.” He picked up the remote. “The movie’s pretty good. I like Gru, and the minions rock. I wish we could build some robots.”
“They’re not robots,
” she said. “They’re life-forms. Ignoring the moral implications, ownership of life-forms destined to servitude fundamentally weakens a society.”
Carter’s eyes twinkled. “You’re saying it’s wrong.”
“Extremely.” She took in the twitch at the corner of his mouth. “You’re teasing me.”
“You make it easy.”
She sighed. “Just you wait. One day I’ll be like everyone else.”
He started the movie and flopped back against the sofa. “I hope not.”
* * *
AN HOUR LATER, Gru and his three new daughters had found happiness together. Carter put the disc back in the case, then turned off the TV and the player.
“That wasn’t so bad,” he admitted. “But next time, I get to pick.”
“It’s a deal.” She stood. “You’re going up to your room?”
He nodded, then stepped close to her. His long, skinny arms hugged her tight. She held on as well, feeling protective and caring at the same time. When he stepped back, she knew she was in danger of crying but couldn’t for the life of her figure out why.
* * *
GIDEON’S FEET HIT the ground in a steady rhythm. The pace was challenging, and he knew he would be feeling the aftereffects in the morning. His regular workouts had been confined to a gym with a few miles on the treadmill and then weight lifting. Neither had prepared him for a run up the side of the mountain.
“Let’s go, ladies,” Angel yelled, and darted ahead.
“You live with that guy?” Gideon asked, then sucked in a breath.
“Not for much longer,” Ford admitted, his breathing just as deep. “The competition’s getting old. We work great together, but sharing a house is too much. Last week I beat him at arm wrestling, which he didn’t like. Consuelo walked in on us trying to work out our differences, and I thought she was going to castrate both of us. I’m going to look for my own place.”
“Angel and Consuelo will continue to share the house?”
“Sure. She does fine with either of us.”
Gideon managed a grin. “If you can’t be the solution, be the problem.”
“You got that right.”
The path shifted, heading nearly straight up. Gideon inhaled, then took the steep trail at a run. When he reached the top, he was gasping for breath, dripping sweat, but rewarded by a view of mountains that stretched on for what seemed like forever.
Except for his buddies’ breathing, it was quiet. Even the hawk circling overhead moved silently as it searched for prey. Angel sprawled on the rocky ground. Due to a bet Gideon hadn’t been part of, he was wearing a backpack. He opened it now and passed out bottles of cold water. Gideon drank nearly half of his in a single gulp, then sank down onto the flat top of the mountain.
The temperature was much cooler up here. It was hot down in Fool’s Gold, but he was okay with that. Moving to the town had turned out to be a good decision. Without Felicia around to pick up the slack with Carter, he didn’t know how he’d make it.
He finished the rest of his water, then stretched out on his back. No point in lying to himself, he thought. Felicia wasn’t picking up the slack—she was doing all of it.
Angel sat up and stared at him. “What?” he demanded. “You look like you’re about to take a bullet.”
Gideon closed his eyes. “Shut up.”
“I’m not the one making that face.”
Gideon shook his head. “It’s not a bullet. It’s the kid.”
Angel must have mouthed a question because Ford whispered, “His kid. The one who showed up.”
“You really didn’t know about him?” Angel asked. “I thought that was just some bullshit I was hearing.”
“I really didn’t know about him.” Hadn’t had a clue.
“If it had to happen anywhere, better here,” Ford said. “The town is safe, he can’t get lost. Carter’s making friends.”
“What? Is there a town gossip column?” Angel asked.
“My nephew told me. Reese. He met Carter up at camp and they’re hanging out together. Reese is a good kid. His dad, Kent, is a math teacher.”
Angel snickered. “Seriously? Your brother?”
There was a brief tussling sound, followed by a groan and silence. Gideon didn’t bother opening his eyes.
“You handling it?” Ford asked.
As he was the one speaking, Gideon was going to guess he’d won the fight. “Not even a little.”
“It’s gotta be hard for both of you,” Ford said. “I remember when my dad died. I was a year out of high school. My sisters were still in school and Kent was away at college. Ethan had to take care of everything. Mom fell apart. It was a tough time. Nothing made sense.”
Gideon opened his eyes and glanced at his friend. “I’m sorry.”
“It was a long time ago.”
Angel sat up. “I was a kid when I lost my mom. Too young to remember much. My dad was a mess, though. I remember him being sad. I lived in a small town, a little like Fool’s Gold. People stepped in to take care of things.”
Gideon wasn’t sure what he was supposed to do with the information. Everybody suffered. Life was hard. None of which helped him deal with Carter. His bottom line was he’d seen what caring did to people.
“What are you going to do about Carter?” Angel asked.
“Hell if I know. There’s nothing to do. He’s my kid. I’ll deal.”
One way or the other.
He wanted to tell himself it would get easier with time, but he wasn’t sure he believed that.
CHAPTER FOURTEEN
FELICIA WOKE TO the absence of sound. She was alone in the big bed in Gideon’s room. She rolled over and saw it was nearly three in the morning. Gideon should be back from the radio station by now, but once again he’d decided to sleep somewhere else. Assuming he slept at all.
He’d gone running with Angel and Ford the day before. She’d hoped hanging out with his friends would help, but he’d been distant afterward. She wanted things to be better between him and Carter, but didn’t know how to facilitate any changes in their relationship.
She turned on a lamp and used the restroom, then decided she was going to find Gideon. If nothing else, he needed to sleep. She brushed her teeth and combed her hair, then pulled a short robe over her thigh-length summer nightgown. With Carter in the house, she didn’t think it was a good idea to walk around partially undressed.
She passed through the living room and made her way out to the deck. Gideon was stretched out on one of the lounge chairs. She knew he was aware of her approaching, but he didn’t bother to look at her. Instead, he stared up at the stars.
“Ever been to the Southern Hemisphere?” he asked, still studying the sky. “It’s all different down there.” He looked at her. “Feel free to give me a lecture on the placement of various star clusters. I’m also interested in your thoughts on the expansion of the universe.”
She looked into his eyes. In the darkness of the night, she couldn’t tell what he was thinking, but she felt his pain. It radiated out from him, warning her he was a wounded animal and she should do her best to keep herself safe. Only she wasn’t interested in safe. Not with Gideon. She wanted to help, and barring that, she wanted to be near him. He was avoiding Carter, and by avoiding his son, he was avoiding her.
She grabbed his hand and tugged. He was big enough and strong enough that she wouldn’t be able to get him to move without his cooperation. Not unless she used some warrior moves she’d been trained for. Luckily he cooperated and rose to his feet.
“What?” he asked, staring into her eyes.
There were dozens of things she could have said, but suddenly none of them mattered. She continued to hold on to his hand as she drew him inside, then led him to the master bedroom.
Once there, she closed the door and locked it, then dropped her robe on the floor. Her nightgown quickly followed. She slipped out of her panties, then waited.
One eyebrow rose. “Direct,” he said, his voi
ce low and velvety.
“I’m not very good at games,” she told him, willing to wait him out.
“You’re very good at games. You win all of them.”
She smiled. “Regular games. Not the boy-girl kind.”
He didn’t smile back. He cupped the side of her face, then slid his fingers through her hair. From there he trailed his way down her back. When he reached the top of her hip, he slid down the curve, across her belly and up the center of her ribs.
Heat followed him, burning her skin and making her want to squirm. But she forced herself to stay completely still, letting him take charge. When his hand closed over her breast, he leaned in and kissed her.
The combination of his mouth on hers and his fingers stroking her breast aroused her to the point where she couldn’t think. An unusual but appealing circumstance. Sensation ruled. The insistent, erotic stroking of his tongue against hers, the light whisper of teasing as he gently squeezed her tight nipple before rubbing it. She went from aroused to desperate in the space of a second and wrapped her arms around his neck.
As she pressed against him, wanting to feel his body against hers, he began to explore her. He ran his hands up and down her back before squeezing her butt. She arched against him, bringing her belly in contact with his erection. Muscles clenched as she imagined how much she would enjoy having him push inside her.
He withdrew slightly and kissed his way along her jaw. When he reached the sensitive skin below her ear, he licked and she moaned. She reached for his shirt—one with buttons down the front—grabbed firmly and pulled. She applied just enough pressure to cause the fibers to rip and buttons to pop.
Gideon straightened and looked down at his now-destroyed shirt. “You could have asked,” he said with a slow, sexy grin. “I would have taken it off.”
“I’m asking now. And not just the shirt.”
“Demanding.”
“I think I’d be comfortable taking charge, if that arouses you.”
“Maybe later.”
He quickly stepped out of his jeans and boxers. The shirt fluttered to the floor, and he was naked.
She immediately reached for his penis, wanting to touch him. The tangible proof of his arousal excited her nearly as much as the physical contact. Although she would be hard-pressed to say that it was better than having him stroke her breasts. Or kiss them. Or lick her clitoris. If she had to put the three of them in order, she would have to admit that—
Two of a Kind Page 18