I’ve been told I wear my emotions for everyone to see. People usually say it like it’s a bad thing. Rayne, however, is the opposite. He keeps everything to himself. Unless he’s mad. Everyone knows when Rayne is mad. Or when it comes to Harper. He’s like a chick around that girl.
Right now Rayne is grinning like a kid in a store filled with candy.
He puts up a hand in an effort to get Darrow to stop playing. But the guy is so absorbed in his music he doesn’t even seem to notice. He just keeps right on playing.
Finally Rayne starts clapping. This gets Darrow’s attention. He stops mid strum.
“I’ve got a few more songs,” he says. “Do you want to hear some Rush or Led Zeppelin?”
Rayne shakes his head. “No, Dude. I think we’ve heard enough.”
Wide-eyed Darrow waits expectantly do hear the outcome of his audition.
“What do you think?” Rayne turns his attention to Xander, who for some reason looks pissed.
Even though Xander says, “Makes no difference to me” it clearly does. I know my brother better than anyone on the planet, and it’s pretty obvious there’s something he doesn’t like about Darrow.
Rayne turns to me and asks the same question.
“He sounds good,” I admit. What I’d never tell him is that he sounds a hell of a lot better than I ever will.
When Rayne turns to Raven she’s nervously chomping on her bottom lip.
“You okay?” Rayne asks her. There’s obvious concern in his voice.
“Of course,” she bites back. “Why wouldn’t I be?”
He throws up his hands. “You look a little—I don’t know—uneasy.”
“We’ve never had to replace one of the guys,” she blurts. I swear it sounds like she’s going to burst into tears at any moment.
Frowning Rayne says, “We’re not replacing anyone. This is a temporary thing until Brooke recovers. Right, Leo?”
“Absolutely,” I state as confidently as I can. Since the Wild Child charged into my life everything is upside down. I used to think Always Rayne was the most important thing in my life. Being on the road with the guys and Raven was everything to me. I don’t know what the future holds anymore. The only thing I do know is that Brooke is now my number one priority.
As Darrow stands he clears his throat. “I know this is a one-time opportunity. I’m not trying to replace Leo. I know he’s irreplaceable.” When he glances at Raven I swear he looks like he wants to hit her, but he quickly covers the rage inside with a huge fake smile. A chill runs up my spine in response.
There’s definitely something about the guy that rubs me the wrong way, but Rayne seems keen to hire him. Plus it’s only for a week, and the guy can play the shit out of the guitar.
“I just hope you’ll give me a chance to play with the band. I’ve always been a huge Always Rayne fan. It would be an honor to play with you, even if it is for just a week.”
Rayne looks back at Xander with his eyebrow raised.
“Sure,” Xander says. “Whatever.”
“Raven?”
“As long as the only thing he expects to play with is his guitar.” When she glares at him the sly son-of-a-bitch actually bites back a grin. It’s like he’s playing some kind of game with her.
I really hope he doesn’t think fucking Raven is part of the deal. Especially when she’s clearly not interested. I would have no problem punching the smug grin off the asshole’s face if I had to. Raven would just have to say the word and it would be done.
Of course I’d wait until they got back from charity concerts to beat the shit out of him. Let him do the gig first.
“I guess you’re in then,” Rayne tells him.
“You won’t be disappointed,” Darrow says as he extends a hand to Rayne.
After they shake Darrow goes over to Xander and extends a hand. Xander narrows his eyes and looks the guy up and down. It looks like he might say something, but thinks better of it and just shakes Darrow’s hand instead.
When Darrow approaches Raven he looks her up and down. The way he’s eyeing her it’s almost like he hasn’t gotten laid in months. Like a guy who’s been on a deserted island and just got rescued by a boat filled with sexy cheerleaders.
But I know better. Guys who look and act like Darrow don’t wait months to get laid. Guys like Darrow walk into a trendy bar and go home with any girl they want whenever they want.
No questions asked.
God only knows why he looks like he’ll starve if he doesn’t get between Raven’s legs.
“I hope your girl gets better soon,” Darrow says when he finally turns his attention to me.
I nod. For some reason I don’t want him to even talk about my girl. I don’t want him anywhere near Wild Child and I definitely don’t want him thinking about her.
“Best of luck in New York,” I tell him.
He laughs. “When you’ve got talent you don’t need luck.”
My first thought is, “Easy for a guy from a wealthy family to say,” but I hold my tongue.
We both stare at each other awkwardly for a few seconds before Rayne says, “Now that we’ve got that settled I’ll have Brad bring by the paperwork and we’ll make it official. Until then do you want to practice with us? Play a few Always Rayne songs.”
“I’ve already got them all memorized,” he says.
“That’s ambitious,” I say.
“When you want something you should act like you already have it,” he says matter-of-factly.
When I frown he says, “I follow The Law of Attraction,” as if I’m supposed to know what that bullshit means.
I want to tell him I follow the Law of Don’t Be a Dickhead, but it seems like it’s already too late for him to follow. If he didn’t have a big, fat dick on his neck he’d be headless.
“I’ll let you guys get to it,” I say loud enough for everyone to hear.
“You’re not going to practice with us?” Xander asks.
I shake my head. “I don’t want to leave Brooke alone too long.”
“I hope I get to meet her.” Darrow gives me one of his fake smiles.
When hell freezes over, I think, but just force a smile instead.
Thirteen
Brooke
“You haven’t really kissed me since the accident,” I tell Leo as he helps me into bed. “I miss it.”
There are a lot of things I miss. Not just his mouth. His hands. His skin on mine.
Even though we’ve been sleeping in the same bed it seems like Leo is afraid to really touch me. It’s like he thinks he’ll hurt me.
“I’ve kissed you,” he insists.
“I mean a real kiss. Not a peck. A kiss with passion and fire.”
When he laughs I get a little of that familiar tingling sensation back again.
“That would be like giving a guy one lick of an ice cream cone, but then telling him he can’t have the rest of it. That’s very dangerous territory, especially when the guy’s starving because he hasn’t had his favorite ice cream in long time.”
“Or any ice cream, I hope…”
He frowns. “You know there’s only one flavor of ice cream for me. And I can’t wait to have it again. When it’s ready.”
Leo quickly undresses and gets into bed with me. He grabs my hand and laces our finger together.
For what seems like several minutes Leo is quiet. Too quiet. There’s no way he’s asleep already. When I glance over at him he looks like he’s deep in thought.
“What’s on your mind?” I ask.
“Nothing,” he says more quickly than I expect.
Of course I don’t believe him. “Tell me.”
He shakes his head. “It’s not important.”
Now he’s got my curiosity piqued. I know one way to get him to tell me, even if it’s a bit devious. “You’re planning on leaving me. Go ahead and say it.” My tone is exaggerated so he gets the idea that I’m goading him.
He turns on his side so he’s facing me. �
��Don’t say that, okay?”
“Okay.” I’m surprised his expression has turned so serious.
As he rubs my knuckles with his thumb he says, “I’m never going to leave you. If anyone does any leaving it’ll be you.”
“And why would I do that?” I ask.
“Isn’t it obvious?”
I shake my head. “Not really.”
“Stop using birth control,” he whispers. At least I think that’s what he says. It’s such a crazy thing for him to say, I’m not 100 percent sure.
“What?” The question pops out of my mouth before I have a chance to stop it.
“Stop using birth control,” he repeats a little louder. “That’s what I was thinking. You said you wanted to know what was on my mind.”
“Why in the world would you even think that?” I’m so shocked I’m not sure what else to say.
“Forget it.”
When I look deep into his dark eyes I can see he’s completely serious. “I’m not going to forget it. You said it and I want to know why?”
He swallows before he says, “So you won’t leave me.” His voice is so quiet it’s almost difficult to hear him.
“It’s not the 1950s. I can raise a baby on my own. Getting pregnant isn’t a guarantee that I won’t leave you. And do you really want to trap me into staying with you? You should want me to be with you because I make a choice every day to be with you.”
He nods, but he won’t look at me again, so I have a feeling I’ve hurt his feelings. I never met a guy so sensitive in my life. He tries to cover it with humor and by being a clown, but he really feels things very deeply. There really are so many ways in which he’s like a five-year-old in a grown man’s body. When I was a kid I was like a 45-year-old in a five-year-old’s body, so maybe that makes us even in some weird way.
“Forget I said it,” he says finally.
“No, I won’t. I can’t. It’s not like I don’t want to have a kid sometime in the future. And maybe I’ve even thought about having a kid with you. But not right now. Like years from now, when I’ve finally got my shit together. Can’t we just enjoy the here and now while we’re here right now?”
He nods, but I can tell he’s not convinced.
“Neither one of us even has our own place to live. We’re basically homeless. We can’t have a kid while we’re still living with Harper and Rayne.”
When I glance over at Leo he looks deep in thought. That makes me extremely nervous. “What’s on your mind?” I probe.
He shakes his head. “Nothing.”
“I don’t believe you.”
“Nothing you need to worry about.” He grins. “Is that better?”
“Not really,” I tell him. He’s been all in for a while. It sounds like he wants me to go all in as well.
Maybe it’s time to put on my big girl panties and give him what he wants.
Me.
Because it’s pretty obvious I’m not going to get rid of him no matter how hard I try.
“Would you hold me for a while?” I ask.
His eyes completely light up. “Really?”
I nod.
“I don’t want to hurt you…”
“It’ll be fine,” I assure him. “We can spoon.”
He gives me a huge grin. “You don’t have to ask me twice.”
As soon as I turn so my back is facing him he snuggles up behind me and holds me in his arms. “Are you sure this is okay?”
More than okay, I want to tell him, but I simply nod instead.
Fourteen
Leo
I clear my throat to get Harper’s attention. She looks busy, but this might be my only chance to talk with her while Brooke is taking a nap.
“What’s up, Leo?” Harper asks.
“Can I come in?”
She glances at a huge pile of papers next to her, but says, “Sure” anyway.
“I won’t take too much of your time,” I tell her.
“It’s okay.” She points to a chair next to her desk. “Have a seat.”
We stare at each other for a few seconds before I speak. “How do you get a house?”
She frowns. “What do you mean?”
“How do you buy a house? Is there like a store or something where you can go and pick one out?”
She laughs. “No, it really doesn’t work like that.” Then she narrows her gaze at me. “Do you want to buy a house?”
I shrug. I’m not ready to admit that I want to get a place for me and my Wild Child. I kind of want to surprise her and I know if I just buy it she can’t try to talk me out of it.
“Most people work with a real estate agent. But before you hire one, you have to have some idea of how much you want to spend on the house and the area in which you’re interested in purchasing it.”
“How much do they cost?”
“It depends on what kind of house you want. Some houses like this one are very expensive, millions of dollars, while others are a few hundred thousand. How much do you have to spend?”
“I’m not sure,” I admit.
“The real estate agent will want to know if you have enough in the bank for a down payment.”
“How much is that?”
“Twenty percent is a good estimate.”
“Can I just pay for the whole thing outright?” I ask.
“If you have enough in the bank.”
I nod. “I’ve got a lot. Always Rayne has made a lot and I haven’t spent it.”
Her eyes go wide. “You haven’t spent any of it?”
“I bought Brooke a watch. That’s about it. I don’t look at the bank statements they email to me. Mainly because I don’t really check my email. But I’ve got a few million.”
She chokes. “A few million?”
“We’re a popular band.”
“You could buy your house without getting a mortgage. You just need to decide how much you want to spend. Here…” She turns back to her computer and pulls up a website. “Take a look at this. This website lists houses that are for sale.” She types for a few seconds. “I narrowed the search to the area around here: Scottsdale, Paradise Valley, Fountain Hills.”
We both look at the screen. She pulls up some big ass houses. “I don’t think we need anything that big.”
“I’ll narrow the search a bit more.” She does more typing. The girl’s got some fast fingers. Not that I’m the best judge of typing skills. I can’t do more than hunt and peck.
The houses she pulls up this time are a little smaller, but still nice. A hell of a lot nicer than the house I grew up in, that’s for sure.
“These homes are a little more modest,” she says. “And reasonably priced for the area.”
“How far are they from your house?”
She points to a small map in the corner of the screen. “You can see the little flags here. It shows you their locations. Most are within ten miles.”
“So how do I get one of those real estate agents? Is it like getting a talent agent? Do I have to audition or something?”
She grins. “It’s a different kind of agent. You just need to phone and set up an appointment. Why don’t you ask Nic who he used?”
“Nah,” I shake my head. “I don’t want to bother him with it. He’s got enough on his plate right now with the new album and replacing me for the charity tour.”
“I’m sure he wouldn’t mind…”
“He wouldn’t mind doing something for you. He loves you. I’m a different story.”
Harper frowns. “Nic loves you too. You’re his cousin. You’re family. He would do anything for you.”
“I don’t know. This whole thing with Darrow is dicey. We’ve never had a substitute for one of the members of Always Rayne before.”
“Nic understands why you can’t do the charity tour. And I know Brooke appreciates it even if she won’t admit it. She might act tough, but I know she doesn’t really want to be alone. Especially while she’s recovering.”
“There’s no way I’
d ever leave her. I’d quit the band entirely before I’d do that.”
Harper’s eyes go wide. “You would?”
“Hell, yes. And I wouldn’t even think twice about it.”
“But you love Always Rayne…”
“I love Brooke more.”
We both look at each other. Harper looks as surprised as I do. I can’t believe the words came out of my mouth.
I love Brooke.
“Don’t tell her I said that.”
“I think you need to tell her.”
I gulp. That’s a really big deal. The biggest.
“Let me deal with this house thing first,” I tell her.
“There are some real estate agents listed on this website. Do you want me to write down the names and numbers?”
I nod. “Thanks.”
Fifteen
Brooke
“How’s the rehab going?” Harper asks as she enters my bedroom.
“You mean the torture?” I reply as I get up from the exercise ball. I’ve been forcing myself to do all of the exercises my physical therapist recommended because I really want to get back to normal as quickly as possible. Well, as normal as I can be anyway.
“You seem to be getting around better.”
“I’m still walking like someone who’s a hundred years old and just pooped her pants.”
“It’s better than not walking at all,” she offers.
“Harper and her silver lining for every shitty cloud. I knew you wouldn’t be able to resist.”
“We’re packing up and getting ready to leave for the charity concerts.”
I heave a sigh. “I still feel guilty about Leo not going because of me. It’s not right…”
She places a hand on my shoulder and to my surprise I don’t flinch. Maybe I’m getting used to people really caring about me, even if I’m still not sure if I deserve it. “Leo cares about you. He wants to be there for you. Let him do that.”
“But the band is his life,” I protest.
I can see in her eyes she’s holding something back. “Tell me what’s going on,” I urge.
“Even though you’re both too stubborn to admit it I know the two of you love each other.”
“And that’s the problem isn’t it?”
She laughs. “Why is that a problem?”
Sometimes Brooke (The ALWAYS SOMETIMES NEVER Rock Star Romance Series Book 2) Page 13