by Pam Eaton
“Thanks for that. I can only hope that maybe you can do the same thing for my daughter one day.”
I know the sentiment is meant to be encouraging, but the reality strikes me with such force. We’re going into hostile territory, and there’s the chance that one or both of us won’t make it out alive. “How do you deal with the possibility of not going home?”
Her expression changes to one of complete seriousness. “I try not to think about that. What I focus on is the task at hand and getting it done. We take huge risks on every mission, but I try to remember that the greater good is what’s important. I always see myself succeeding, nothing less.”
“Do you even know what’s so important in that black box?”
“No, and I don’t try to question it. I figure it’s better if I don’t know. That way I have no emotional connection to it. It’s safer sometimes to be ignorant.”
I trust her and can see her logic, but there’s such a temptation to know.
“All right,” she says. “Friend time over, mentor time back on. We need to get to sleep or we won’t be any good to anyone tomorrow.” She flops onto her own bed.
“Good luck tomorrow,” I whisper.
“Becca, we don’t need luck. We’ve trained for this, and I trust you and Tony.”
The sound of his name brings the shame back to the forefront of my mind. “Tony. I had almost forgotten about him.”
“This is coming from a friend: make sure you deal with him after all of this. You’re going to break that poor guy’s heart.”
I hate it, but she’s right. The way he looks at me now is so different. No longer does he have a playful look in eyes. It’s much more intense and serious. I can’t go to him just to have fun anymore—that time has come and gone. “I’ll deal with that once we’re done and back home safe.”
He deserves so much more from me, and he deserves someone better as well.
Thirty-Three
In the morning, we assemble in Gregory’s room. Apparently he’s been in communication with Mr. Smith already, and we need to get moving on to the next leg of our trip. “We have enough time to grab our stuff and have a quick breakfast, and then we are off again,” Gregory says.
We depart the hotel and soon pull into the parking lot of a marina. Tony’s facial expression says it all. “Where are we headed now?” he asks.
“On a boat ride, and that’s all you’re going to get,” Ania answers, grabbing all the bags by herself.
We set out into the unknown, with only water stretching out for miles. I resolve to stay up on deck with the cold breeze whipping at my hair. It makes me feel alert and alive.
Looking over the rail of the ship, I try to imagine what lies ahead. The saltiness of the air corrodes my thoughts, so much so that I don’t even realize that I’m not alone anymore. Tony stands beside me and breathes deeply as if drinking in the air. “Are you nervous?” I ask him.
“Nervous? No way. Look at me. Don’t I look like the epitome of cool and calm?”
I glance over at him. He’s such a bad liar. “Well, I would say yes, but you’re all sweaty and it’s really not that warm out here.”
He rests his chin on my shoulder. “Of course I’m nervous. I never thought in a million years that I would be halfway around the world on a secret mission, especially one that could get me killed.”
His words ring true in my mind. I’m nervous too, but what choice do I have? It’s not like I can run away or go hide under my covers. There’s so much more to face than just this mission. I feel like I’m living a lie, too. This business with Gregory is clouding my thoughts and emotions.
Tony stands tall next to me, unmoving and strong. “I’m really scared,” I admit.
He pulls me close, my back to his front, his arms around my waist. We stand there staring out to the distant shoreline. Our fate lies behind those green hills and mountains. “I can’t really tell you that it’s going to be okay. But I promise to do my best to guide you and Ania. I want you safe more than anyone in this world.”
His promise is reassuring. After all, he’ll be our eyes, the man who could put us in the path of safety or disaster. He’ll show us the way; I don’t doubt it.
If it weren’t for what lies ahead of us, I might be admiring the beauty of our surroundings more. We’re out in the ocean, still miles from land, with nothing but this greenish blue water underneath, and the clouds above.
Ania joins us at the rail and Tony releases me from his arms. Natural sunlight makes her look more beautiful than ever. She leans over the railing, looking at the water below. “I remember the first mission I went on.”
Both Tony’s and my ears perk up. No one’s ever really talked to us about what they’ve done in the field before. I lean closer to her so I won’t miss a single word.
“I was about the same age as you guys. They sent me to Egypt to find some hidden artifacts that were important to our ancestors and our operation. They were scrolls, and some said they contained prophecies from our ancestors. There used to be a man who could see the future. He was killed during the time of Moses, but not before he recorded what he had seen.” Her eyes stay fixed on the horizon.
“I don’t know what they said, but they were important enough that I was given the task of retrieving them. I was part of a small group. The plane ride there was the worst part. My stomach wouldn’t settle and I didn’t even dare eat anything for fear of retching it all back up. I kept telling myself that this wasn’t going to be another training.” She shakes her head, a sad smile on her face.
“When we got to the secured location, it was up to me to subdue the guards. The air was thick with sand and heat. My palms were so sweaty, and I didn’t know how effective I would be at hand-to-hand combat, but I had no choice. That was the first time I had to kill a man. It was awful. It was the worst feeling in the world, but I kept telling myself that he would kill me first if I was caught. I had to get us into the room.” Her eyes are still looking out at the water, but it’s like she’s not even here with us anymore. Like she’s back there. Her hands shake.
“This isn’t always a pretty business we’re in, but it is not always so horrible. I’ve saved hundreds of lives and protected those I work with. I once got to save a young girl who had been kidnapped and taken halfway around the world. With everything in life, there are wins and losses. I want this mission to be a success. I want you two to know that by doing this, we are protecting the innocent. If we can enter and leave without ever being seen, I would be so happy.”
I haven’t even let myself really think what will happen when we encounter other people. Sure, I’ve been training with her to fight, but could I take someone else’s life? I shudder at the thought.
Ania turns and leaves us at the railing, heading back down below the deck. For the first time I see fear in Tony’s eyes. What did he have to fear? He would be miles away from any real danger. Was that fear for me? He grasps my shoulder tightly. “Whatever happens, you remember how fast you are and all that Ania taught you.”
I nod in agreement.
“I second that notion,” Gregory says from behind.
I turn and see him standing there. It’s the first time since we said goodbye last night that he has spoken to me directly. “Could you give us a moment, Tony?”
He releases my shoulder and pushes past Gregory, smacking him in the shoulder as he walks past.
“He’s just nervous, that’s all.”
Gregory scowls. “You don’t need to defend him, Becca.”
We stand at the railing together, basking in the warmth of the sun. I would give anything for it to be just the two of us out in the ocean alone. “Ania told us about her first mission.”
“Really?” I was expecting more of a response. He doesn’t seem that surprised, but he tries to act it all the same.
“What was your first mission like?”
He rubs the back of his head and squints up at the sun. “Now is not the time for me to tell you that story.”
He keeps a treasure trove of secrets from me. What are we doing with each other? I feel like he knows the world about me, but I only get bits and pieces from him. And yet my heart just wants him. He lets his fingers stroke mine. “Promise me that you’ll be careful and do your best to come out unharmed.”
“I will. I know I can be stubborn at times, but I don’t have a death wish.”
He pulls me in close and hugs me tightly. I know he doesn’t dare kiss me—too many prying eyes. The warmth of his body gives me such comfort and the smell of his skin makes me weak in the knees. What if something goes wrong?
When he pulls away, an unnamed feeling washes over me, like an impending doom. “Better get down below deck and join Tony. It won’t be long till we reach shore.”
Once we reach land again, we’re hurried into an SUV with blackened windows, and a driver I don’t recognize. I don’t get a chance to look at our surroundings, but there’s an unmistakable smell of sea water, dirt, and dead fish.
As we buckle our seat belts, Ania pulls out two black pieces of cloth. It doesn’t take long for Tony and me to be blindfolded. “Is it really necessary to keep where we’re going a secret?” I ask.
Before anyone answers, our eyes are covered and we enter into darkness. “It’s for your own protection. We haven’t schooled you on ways of withstanding torture. You won’t be able to give too many details in case of capture,” Gregory says matter-of-factly.
The sound of his voice momentarily puts me at ease, until I realize he said the word torture. Hell. My nerves are on edge and I wish he could hold my hand.
The ride is smooth at first, not a lot of turns or stopping. A deep exhaustion washes over me. I try to fight it, but it lulls me nonetheless.
It takes me a minute to realize that I’m dreaming.
Before me stands Gregory, with his emerald green eyes staring at me. Wait, he’s not staring at me; it’s like he’s staring through me. I turn and see a vast forest before my eyes. Thousands upon thousands of trees stretch out for miles. I don’t even know the names of the plants I’m looking at. I can’t tell what he’s looking at.
I turn back to him and he’s just standing there, unmoving, unflinching. In an instant, Mr. Smith is standing beside him. Something is clutched in his hand, but I can’t make it out and I’m frozen where I stand. When he looks toward me, I realize that he can see me, unlike Gregory. His lips turn into a cruel smile. “I told you to end things, but you wouldn’t listen. Now I have to take care of this…problem…for good.”
I don’t understand what he’s telling me until he raises his hand. Light glints off the blade. He reaches toward Gregory’s throat. Quick as lightning, he slashes at his jugular. In one fleeting moment, he’s taken the man I love. Gregory slumps to the ground, his lifeless eyes looking through mine.
I want to scream, but I can’t. I want to run and save him, have him in my arms, but my body won’t move. Mr. Smith looks into my eyes. “All part of the plan.”
He turns and walks away into darkness. I draw in a deep breath and release a roar. “What plan!? WHAT PLAN!?”
When I open my eyes, I’m still in darkness. It takes me a minute to realize where I am. These dreams are going to give me a psychotic breakdown. I know I need to figure them out, but the stress is weighing on me. Why did my mom want me to in the first place? I can’t deal with this now.
After what I assume is an hour, we’re no longer on a paved road. It’s evident by the constant thrashing of the SUV. I swear the driver is trying to hit every hole and rock he can find. It’s bad enough being tossed around, but not being able to see is driving me crazy and making me a little queasy. Not to mention that my palms are sweaty and my knees won’t stop shaking. I feel like I’m waiting for the beginning of a championship basketball game to start. The anticipation is killing me. We just need to get there and get this over with.
Another hour passes and we finally come to a stop. Ania takes my blindfold off, and at first I close my eyes at the bright sun, but then I see the view. White peaked mountains, lush trees with their leaves turning brilliant shades of red and yellow, and the unbroken blue sky for miles. I take a deep breath. The air is so clean and crisp. Definitely not the dead-fish stench from earlier today. This has to be where Tony will be guiding us from; the advantage of the height is clearly evident.
Gregory steps out of the SUV and tells the agent in the driver’s seat to wait a minute. “All right, Tony, this is where you will be stationed. Here is your two-way radio. The girls will have earpieces.”
Tony looks around. “Are you leaving me alone here?”
“Yeah. This is far enough away that I’m not worried,” Gregory says, and nods his head.
Gregory gives Tony more instructions while I take in the view. I wish I had my camera, because this is amazing. Such a random thought considering what we’re about to do.
With one last meaningful look from Tony, we turn to leave. We hop back into the vehicle and Gregory turns to face Ania and me. “I’ll be at our pre-disclosed rendezvous point. Do you have your map of the building?”
She pulls out a little device that looks like a cell phone and presses a button. The hologram of the compound appears and we go through it again, exactly where we are to retrieve the package, where to exit the building, and how to get back to Gregory. No matter how many times we go over the plan, I’m always afraid that I’m going to miss something.
“Good. Now, the town is pretty close to the compound, but hopefully that’ll help provide cover,” Gregory tells us.
Last night Mr. Smith called, giving us the go-ahead on the mission. “Tomorrow seems to be a local holiday with lots of tourists, a perfect opportunity to hide in plain sight,” Mr. Smith said.
We haven’t been driving for long when we stop again. Gregory looks into my eyes and I see fear in his. “This is where we say goodbye for now. I’ll see you two soon. Be smart, be safe, and above all, don’t get caught.”
Thirty-Four
Ania and I head off on foot through the woods. The view’s not as amazing as where Tony is, but the surroundings are still pretty remarkable. Thankfully, most of the trees haven’t dropped their leaves yet. The sounds are unfamiliar and strange. The air is cool but bearable. Not too cold yet. Ania signals me to stop and we drop low. We check over our gear and make sure that our earpieces are working. “Do you read us, Tony?”
A slight crackling penetrates my ear. “Loud and clear, Ania. I’ll let you know if I see anyone coming your way. It looks like it gets pretty steep, so watch your footing.”
We move at a pretty fast pace, dodging tree limbs and roots. The whole time I keep thinking how surreal all this feels. It’s almost like we’re back in the woods near the cabin. All we have to do is find the clearing, just like any other day.
I know I can outrun Ania, but I keep pace behind her as she takes the lead. It doesn’t take us long to reach the outer fence of the compound. Tony chimes in our ears. “There looks to be a guard about a hundred yards to the west. The fence doesn’t look electrified. I would still check it, though. There’s a hole in the links about fifty yards to your east. It looks big enough for you two to finish with wire cutters pretty quickly.”
The fence does look a little ragged, and we soon find the hole that Tony’s talking about. Ania puts her ear close to the fence, waiting to hear if the fence is electrified. It seems to take forever and I keep looking, waiting for a solider to come strolling our way. She nods at me and then starts cutting more fence. She squeezes through it first and I follow suit.
We duck behind a building and she brings out the hologram. It’s about a hundred yards to the central building. She signals Tony with her hands concerning guards.
“There are three watchtowers. All three are occupied, but they seem to be distracted with the festivities going on in the town square.”
Tony’s voice crackles in our ears again. “Don’t try to mix and mingle with the people— you’ll stick out like sore thumbs, but utili
ze all the commotion to move swiftly in the shadows.”
We carefully move closer and closer, the crowds of people not too far away from the border of the compound. We keep low and out of sight. I notice the laughter, the smiles, and the sounds of people having fun. My heart sinks a little bit. I’ve been missing out on so much these past few months. It wasn’t long ago that I would have been like one of them, completely clueless to the dangers in this world. Everything has turned on its axis.
Yes, I’ve found Gregory, but the repercussions we could encounter scare me nightly. I think what scares me most of all is not being able to find joy with him without having to constantly look over my shoulder. Now, however, is not the time for self-pity. I’ve got to concentrate on the task at hand.
With all the commotion and noise, it’s easy to slip in and out of the shadows while the crowd and soldiers are unaware. We move stealthily into the center building as planned. Ania crouches down and I do as well. All I want to do is close my eyes, but I need to keep watch while she digs in our only bag, which I’m carrying for when I grab the package. She pulls out our map and signals that we need to maneuver to an adjoining stairwell.
The building is silent, but we step lightly so our feet make no noise. I’m used to running at fast speeds, but having to move quietly is a whole different game.
The door to the stairs is unlocked. I can’t believe the lack of security in this place. Something makes my hair stand on end, but when I stop, nothing but silence surrounds us. We begin descending several levels, moving quickly. She stops at a door, crouches down, and opens it enough to see if anyone is coming. She signals me to follow. Suddenly she stops, puts her arm up, and pushes me back into the stairwell. Her face is a neutral mask, not even breaking a sweat. It’s taking everything I have to stop my knees from trembling.