Annabelle won't be tracking me down anytime soon because she left. My not turning into her vampire slave, or whatever the hell she thought I would become, aggravated her enough to leave town. I'm sure she'll end up coming back at some point, but it won't be for me. She will never come back for me because I'm not what she wanted after all. I didn't submit the way she thought I would. I have you to thank for that.
It's funny you should say you dreamed of me last night because I dreamed of you too. Now you have me wondering if we've dreamed the same thing. Were there candles all around us in yours? God, this is so weird.
Please visit this weekend. I need to see you in person, but be prepared because I might not let you leave. You know SCAD has some writing programs. Hint, hint.
Anxiously awaiting your arrival,
Holder
P.S. I don't think I can ever rewatch Twilight after this. It will just piss me off because I don't sparkle.
P.S.S. Are you freaking kidding me? Movie Central closed? I feel like a piece of me just died. Again. We should buy it and only offer our favorite movies. No crappy new releases. We could change the name to Nostalgic Movie Central. I'm game if you are.
37
October 16
Subject: We’ll always have email…
Dear Holder,
I’m writing this from my phone sitting outside your dorm. Yes that makes me sound like a crazy stalker–but you already know I'm a witch, and you drink my blood, so stalking shouldn’t matter so much to you. I’m sitting outside because I’m nervous. I’m not nervous about what you are, let’s just make that clear, just like I hope you aren’t nervous about what I am. I’m nervous about what we are going to become. I know once I see you we will never be able to go back to normal, or our version of normal, i.e. this.
Promise me no matter what happens we’ll make Nostalgic Movie Central happen. A new generation of kids need to experience that place. Neither of us would be who we are (not referring to the supernatural here) today without it. I know neither of us had any plans of going back home after graduation, but contrary to what my mom thinks, it’s not that bad of a place to be. If we had the money now we could pay someone else to run it. Find a couple of high school kids that remind us of our old selves. Doesn’t senior year feel like forever ago even though it hasn’t even been a full six months?
I’ve never been this nervous in my life. I’m sitting here holding a backpack with a potion that is made up of some of my blood, yet my nervousness has everything to do with facing you.
Should I come up? Do you want me to?
Of all the movie stores in all the towns in all the world, you walked into mine,
Fern
38
October 16
Subject: Gill-Man coming at ya
This might sound strange, but I knew I felt you. I knew you were here.
I'm on the other side of campus, turning in an extra credit essay to one of my professors. As soon as he answers his damn office door, and I can put this in his hand, I'll be there.
Don't be nervous. You know what I am. I know what you are. We both know what happened. The doesn't mean anything between us has to change, unless you want it to.
All the cards are in your hands, Fern.
Just don't leave. I've already found a corny movie for us to watch tonight. One that should bring back memories.
Remember the night we watched The Creature From the Black Lagoon at Movie Central? I couldn't stop laughing, but you thought it was kind of creepy. I figured it’s only fitting we watch it tonight in tribute to the place closing.
Be there in a second.
Holder
P.S. Nostalgia Movie Central is happening. It has to. We can't deprive the next generation of epic movie greatness.
39
October 16
Subject: Book my passage to Skull Island
Dear Holder,
Of all the fears I’ve faced in my life, this one is the second worst. The absolute worst was when I had to face the fact that you might not live. Compared to that, facing you now is nothing.
The Creature From the Black Lagoon is a perfect choice. Watching a movie about a misunderstood monster seems more than fitting. Afterwards maybe we can watch the Peter Jackson version of King Kong again.
This is it. I’m coming up before I can change my mind.
Hope you get that extra-credit. Hope this isn’t somehow awkward. All right, no hoping about it. It won’t be.
See you in a sec.
Fern
40
October 18
Subject: The Ghost Of You Is Still Here
You left this morning, and I already miss you. How psychotic am I? I debated whether I should even email you this soon, but in the end I felt like I didn't have a choice. Emails feel like I'm talking to you. Like you're right in front of me. Maybe it's because that's how things started between us this year, or maybe it's because of the connection we have now. I don't know. All I do know is I miss you unlike I've ever missed anyone.
It's almost like you're haunting my place, like you're haunting me.
Not in a bad way. Not in a way like I feel a need to contact people who do exorcisms and investigate possessed dolls.
No. You're haunting me in a good way.
I can hear your laugh. I can see you throwing popcorn at the TV when something happens in the movie you don't particularly like. I can still smell your faint perfume lingering in the air.
I know you said you felt stupid for being nervous about spending time with me. I know you were worried things might be different. We didn't really talk about it while you were here, but I have to know–were things different for you?
Things were damn sure different for me. Do you know how hard it was to not kiss you when you said goodbye?
Holder
P.S. Halloween can't get here soon enough. You're still coming to visit then, right?
41
October 19
Subject: When Fern met Holder
Dear Holder,
Yes, things were different. But a good kind of different. I wanted to kiss you too, and I almost did, but like so many things I chickened out. Maybe I won’t next time I see you. I’m coming for Halloween. I’m even starting to get used to the drive.
I used to wonder why there were so many movies about friends falling for each other. It seemed like a silly trope compared to all the other possibilities out there. I get it now.
So what now? I guess only time will tell. I’m glad you emailed so quickly, it helps my obsessive email refreshing habit. I’d have far too much time on my hands without it.
Fern
P.S.
I love that you like bad movies as well as the good ones. I love that you don’t mind my stealing your hooded sweatshirt. (It’s stealing. You are never getting it back). I love that you actually separate your laundry by color. I love that you are still you, and I know in my heart you always will be.
42
October 23
Subject: Money Can Buy Happiness
It's after midnight. I know we've been texting a lot lately, but I didn't want to text and risk waking you up since it’s so late. We both know how much that's not an issue for me any longer, but for you it still is, so emailing seemed necessary.
You know how hard I've been struggling to find a replacement job since I lost the ghost tour one, right? Well, I have to tell you my money troubles ( at least for the foreseeable future) are now on pause. You'll never guess what was left with my roommate for me–an envelope with a check written for a substantial amount of money.
A life-changing amount, really.
Seriously, there's enough here for me to dropout of college and travel the world. Sound like something you'd be up for? Don't worry, I wouldn't take us traipsing around dark, mysterious caves in the Appalachian Mountains. We definitely don’t want to get trapped underground and eaten by some wicked creatures.
I guess I should probably tell you who the check was from,
even though I'm sure you can guess.
Annabelle.
She left me a note saying she was sorry. She said she thought we had a connection. She knows now my connection runs much deeper with someone else. I think this will be the last time I hear from her. She hasn't been around the house we're renovating for school. In fact, she hired a caretaker to oversee the changes made. My professor said she took a job offering in Europe. The job offering is a lie, but Europe might not be. Distance from her is good.
Holder
P.S. If you don't want to drop out with me and travel the world, at least consider moving here. I've already said there's a great writing program. I don’t think emails, texts, and phone calls will be enough. Call me selfish.
P.S.S. I can also buy Movie Central. We could totally do the Nostalgic Movie Central thing, if you wanted...
43
October 25
Subject: I have the rest of my life to find out
Hey Holder,
Sorry if I seemed rude in my texts yesterday. I had to do something I should have done years ago. I confronted my mom. I’d like to say I got brave and drove home to face her, but I didn’t. She came here. But maybe the how it happened part doesn’t matter, since I said what I needed to say.
She wanted me to end up with Lars. That’s kind of obvious, but I told her the truth. I told her the whole truth about how I’ve fallen for you, and you know what I am so you’re not going to try to stop me from being the best witch I can be. I expected her to yell, but she didn’t. Instead she smiled. She told me she’d been worried I’d turn my back on who I am, but if you are supportive then she wants me to be happy. She was less thrilled when I mentioned transferring schools, until she realized I planned to join the Savannah chapter of my sorority. I guess there’s your answer–I want to be closer to you too.
I’m not sure how I feel about the money. I don’t want us to owe Annabelle anything, you know? Part of me wants to throw out that check, but that’s not for me to do. All I care about right now is being with you. We have no idea where this is going to go, but I know the ending. I know we’ll make it through whatever comes our way. I’ve kept all of our emails. I think years from now we’ll be glad we have them.
Can’t wait to see you,
Fern
P.S. That quote from Big Fish seems more true now than ever. The one about how time stops when you meet the love of your life, but then it speeds up after. Time has definitely sped up since we started emailing each other. Let’s enjoy every minute of it.
44
November 2
Subject: Now or Never
Halloween came and went too fast. Although, I am a tad bit disappointed the All-Hallows Eve celebration with your soon-to-be Savannah witchy chapter wasn't as cool as I thought it would be. I was expecting everyone to be dressed in pointy hats and solid black. Maybe I'm taking it a little too far, but I also expected everyone to jump from the roof while holding black umbrellas.
Oh well, the midnight margaritas were still perfect.
Holder
P.S. I never asked, are you going home for Thanksgiving? My mom's already bugging me about it. Honestly, I'm not sure I should go. What if she can tell something's different about me? If I don’t go this year though, I might never...
45
November 3
Subject: You’ve Got Mail
Holder,
Isn’t it funny how we keep falling back on email? It’s a hard habit to break, especially since I love checking my box and seeing something other than junk mail or assignments from professors. In a world of short text messages, I also like having more space to express myself. And it reminds me of my favorite feel-good, make me cry movie. Yeah, we already knew each other, and you aren’t trying to put me out of business, but so many other similarities. ;)
We should go home for Thanksgiving. I say we, because I’m not going without you. Besides, aren’t we going to put in our bid for Movie Central?
Sorry my witches didn’t live up to expectations, but you know I can mix a pretty powerful potion. Miss you already. Who am I kidding? I missed you less than a minute after I left. Yet another reason we should go home for Thanksgiving. I’ll have your back. I promise.
I wanted it to be you,
Fern
46
November 4
Subject: Monster House
I’ll go home for Thanksgiving, but you have to promise you’re coming with me. You know once I tell my mom I’m coming I won’t be able to recant the statement no matter what.
I can’t believe I’m even considering this. My mom is going to know something is different. If she doesn’t then someone else will. Especially when I don’t eat as much as I normally would. Can you make me a potion that gives me a ravenous appetite for normal food? Never mind. That might not be the best idea, considering. Not that I’m downplaying your talent with potions, but I feel like my luck would be that the entire thing would backfire, and I’d drain my family dry of all their blood or something equally as creepy and horrific.
Screwing with a vampire’s appetite is probably not the best thing to do…
You’re right, going home will give us a chance to put in a bid on Movie Central. I wonder if the space is still available. It’s going to be weird driving by the place and knowing it’s no longer in business. Think they still have the original sign up?
Holder
P.S. Why does going home feel so damn ominous? It’s not like the house is going to eat me. The people inside it either. Still, my palms are sweaty thinking about it.
47
November 4
Subject: Punctuation and NJ
Holder,
Of course I’m going to be with you, and I have a plan that is going to help everything.
What would freak your mom out more than your loss of appetite?
Answer: Moving too fast in a relationship. We go home, tell her we are going to elope, and she’ll freak. Then we’ll let her “convince” us to slow it down. She’ll be so relieved, she won’t notice anything else. Perfect plan, right? Ok, maybe it’s not, but it’s all I have right now. Either way, you have to go home eventually. We might as well do it together now.
Plus, it means we get to see each other for a long weekend. That sounds amazing. How are you feeling BTW? Do you need more of my blood?
Glad we don’t need an ellipsis,
Fern
P.S. The sign had better still be there.
P.P.S. Save up some appetite. If there’s anything you still crave it’s going to be your mom’s mashed potatoes.
48
November 29
Subject: SCREAM
Well, we weren’t fighting a crazy person wearing a white mask and a black cloak, but we did survive Thanksgiving with my mom just the same. She could have counted as a crazy person, though. The way she looked when I told her we were eloping Thanksgiving day so we’d always remember our wedding anniversary was priceless. I know you thought that was dumb, but she believed it. I told you she would. Maybe that’s a testament to how stupid she really thinks I am.
By the way, thanks for everything you did for me these past few days. Whatever it was you gave me actually had me feeling human again. At least as close to human as I’ve felt in a while. What would I do without you, Fern? Seriously.
Potions & Fangs Page 6