by Nicki Rae
“I tried to have a good time with old friends and again I told myself you were better off without me. I had just come home from a buddy’s house when I heard Tyler and Shay talking about her heading to see you. I knew that was my queue to come to you one last time. I told myself that if it didn’t work that I would have to just get the fact that we were done. I heard that you lived in Muncie but Shay wouldn’t tell Tyler where you were staying. And, at the sake of making myself looking like a fuckin psycho path, I knew I had to get to you at whatever means possible. Anyway, that is when I stayed up all night and followed Shay to your house. I found you drinking. I couldn’t take it Emily. I had to fix it. And then all this shit happened with my parents. It’s time I get my shit together and that includes making things right with you. I am planning to move back and switch schools. I was doing it anyway to be closer to you but now with all this shit happening with my parents, whether this-I point from me to her-works or not, it’s happening. I love you Emily. I never stopped loving you, I just made a fucked up decision that I learned from a thousand times over; I hope you can see that.”
*Emily*
I am completely at a loss for words. I never expected that to come out of his mouth, so I sit there a minute or so to try to process everything.
“Say something, Emily”
“Give me a second.”
I don’t even know what to say to that. I mean, I would be lying if I said that I wasn’t a little excited that he is making such an effort just to be closer to me. I said that I would never make him choose between going to the school he wanted and me but I am over that now; I want him here with me.
At the same time, I have been waiting the whole summer for time to go back to school, that way I could get my mind off him. Logan only being a few miles away is a lot different from him being a few hundred miles away.
“So, you’re telling me that you will be going to the same school as me?”
“Yes, I have already started the paperwork.”
I’m sure he sees the shock in my face.
“Ok, where will you be staying?”
“I haven’t got that part figured out yet.”
How convenient.
“I have a buddy that goes there as well; I was hoping I could stay with him while I find something.”
Oh, thank goodness.
My phone is ringing, I look at the ID and it’s a number I don’t recognize. It would be rude to answer it but it may be important.
“Excuse me, Logan.” I put my finger up.
“Hello?”
“Hey, Emily, it’s Justin. I know you said that you weren’t ready but I couldn’t wait.”
I glance at Logan and he pulls his eyebrows together, questioningly; this is all I need.
“This isn’t really a good time, can I call you back?”
“Is it ever going to be a good time, Emily?”
I don’t want to be mean but this guy has some nerve.
“You know what, probably not. I’m sorry, I have to go.” I hang up.
“Everything ok?” Logan asks.
“Yes, it is now. Sorry about that, where were we?”
”You were telling me what you thought about me moving back.”
“Look Logan, I am not going to sit here and tell you that I don’t love you anymore, I would be lying. But I can’t tell you how things between us are going to work in the future. I told you that I would be there for you for your parents and I will. I can’t promise anything beyond that.”
“Fair enough, but can you keep an open mind with me and not just completely shut me out?”
“You mean like you did with me?”
He glares at me but why is ok for him and not me?
“I don’t know how I can make it up to you, Em, but I will do whatever you want.”
This guy just poured his heart out to me and his parents are in the hospital because he was trying to “make it up” to me, so I should at least give him some peace of mind.
“I will keep an open mind Logan. And, thank you for telling me all of that, I don’t think you understand how much I needed to hear it.”
He moves over and sits next to me in the booth. He turns my face to his and looks straight in my eyes, “Probably as much as I needed to say it.”
He kisses me and as our kiss deepens, Logan’s phone rings. Quickly he pulls away and answers, “Hello?”
“No, no change with either of them.”
It must be Tyler.
“Yeah, ok man, see you in a few.”
He blows out his breath, “We should get back and check on Mom and Dad.”
We get up and once again Logan grabs my hand and we walk back to his mom’s room.
*Logan*
I feel a little better now that Emily knows what’s going on. I know she said she can’t promise anything but that will change, it has to. Before we make it back to mom’s room, we stop at the waiting area to wait for Tyler and Shay.
Emily has her head resting on my shoulder when they show up and I see a smirk on Shay’s face. Tyler also sees her sleeping and asks if we need some time to rest, they didn’t mind staying, if we needed a break. I tell him that would be great and that we would just be taking a nap and then head back.
We were silent the whole way back to my parent’s house. I think that everything that has happened today has finally caught up with us. We walk in and Emily looks around the house before her eyes fall on me. I hadn’t thought this would be as awkward, I need to fix that.
I move my left hand to the small of Em’s back and move my fingers is a small circular motion, trying to release the tension that I feel. I hope this is easing her anxiety about being here.
“Do you need anything?”
She just shakes her head and I walk up to her. My hands instinctively move up and down her arms.
“Can we lie down?”
She asks as she looks up at me with those beautiful brown eyes and if I’m not mistaken the look on her face says she doesn’t want to lie down and sleep.
Fuck me, “Let’s go.”
I take her hand and we walk up to my room. As soon as the door shuts, she kisses me, and it isn’t a peck on the lips, she has pushed me up against the door and her hands are now feeling up my stomach and abs.
“Emily, are you sure about this? If we start, I won’t be able to stop.”
She slips my shirt over my head and starts kissing down my neck; I take that as a yes. I pick her up and she wraps her legs around my waist. I back her up against the wall and she takes her shirt off. I start kissing her neck and head south to her beautiful breasts. I have always been impressed with the way they fit perfectly in my hand. As I take one in my mouth, I use my free hand to massage the other.
Emily’s hands are pulling at my hair, and I take her nipple between my fingers and pinch, and she moans. That makes me my dick twitch and become even harder. I have to get her to my bed. I pull her away from the wall but continue kissing her as she unbuttons my pants. I put her down on my bed and stand up to look at her.
“Take the rest off.”
She unbuttons her pants and shimmies out of them. She starts to take her black lace panties off and I stop her, “Let me.”
I kick off my boots and jeans and bend over her. I kiss her sweetly and when I pull away, I look into her eyes and say, “You are so beautiful.”
She smiles shyly and I kiss down her neck, she moans.
“It’s been so long, Logan.”
I stop as something occurs to me, “Have you been with anyone else since I left?”
I am not sure I want to know.
“Never mind. It’s none of my business.”
I shake my head and continue to descend her body kissing and nipping all the way.
“No, Logan. Only you,” she says and I smile at her and use my teeth to take her panties off and she giggles.
She is already wet for me and I am in heaven. I move my fingers over her center as my tongue attacks her. I have to hold her in place,
“Hold still baby.”
I swirl my tongue and lap up everything she has to give me as my fingers dive in deep, she screams out. My fingers moving at a teasing pace, I can tell she is building. She is pulling at my hair as she is moving my head to where she wants me to be. I laugh as I flick my tongue and she explodes. As I finish drinking in all her juices, I get up. I reach over to my table and pull out a condom. I wrap up and move on top of her.
I kiss her and say, “I will go slow, I know it’s been a while.”
“Just until I get used to you again,” she says against my lips.
I slowly guide myself into her and stop, “You ok?”
“Yes,” she hisses.
I start to move but still slow until she has all of me, I give her a moment to get used to the fullness and then I start to move in rhythm, picking up pace as we continue. I love this fuckin woman; I could just sit here and stare at her beautifully naked body all day.
I sit all the way up on my knees and pull her legs to my chest and she smiles at me.
“You ready, baby?”
She just shakes her head, and I dive deep and fast; she is screaming.
“Yeah that’s right, baby, scream for me.”
She screams one last time and I feel her juices all over me.
I thrust two more times and explode.
Fuck that was amazing!
We are both catching our breath as I lay down beside her.
“That was amazing, Logan.”
“I was just thinking the same.” I wink at her.
Chapter 16
*Emily*
I feel Logan’s chest moving steadily. I should be sleeping right now but I just can’t get out of my head that I just fucked up. I look at Logan as he is peacefully sleeping and I take in his beautiful body.
I wonder if he is still wrestling. I wouldn’t be surprised if he is, he is in very good shape. He has broad shoulders, a narrow waist, and that beautiful V that leads down to my favorite part of him. There was a while that I dreamed that this day would come and then when it didn’t, I just gave up. I guess I resigned myself to that fact that Logan wanted someone else.
I have been strong, and picked myself up, and tried to move on. And, now, with everything going on, I sleep with him the first chance I get. What kind of person does that make me?
I feel Logan move beside me, I really need to try to sleep, so I turn my head to the side to get comfortable and I notice on his arm a tattoo. How did I miss that? I want to pick his arm up to see the whole thing but I don’t want to wake him so I just turn my head back to his chest and am met with those beautiful greens.
Logan lazily smiles and pulls me closer to his side.
“Hey.” He says, sleepily and I’m pretty sure my heart melts.
“When did you get that tattoo?” I ask.
“I’ve had a few months. Do you like it?”
He picks up his arm so that I can see it better. It isn’t very big, that must be how I missed it. It is on the inside of his left bicep, it is an infinity symbol that has the words “forgiveness” interwoven throughout all of the line work.
“It’s beautiful, Logan, but why did you feel the need to get it?” I say. I take my fingers and outline the intricate lines it has flowing through it.
This one is much smaller than his first tattoo on his right shoulder. Logan, Tyler, and Charles all have a wooden cross with their grandfather/father’s name.
“Well, I told you that I was going through a really rough time since…” He says closing his eyes in disgust.
“I had a close buddy at school that always heard me beating myself up over that shit. He told me I can’t change what I did and that the only way I could move on was to forgive myself. So, I went out the next day and got tatted. I got it because I had to believe that you would forgive me for what I did to you and we could move on with our lives.”
How do I respond to that?
“Did it hurt?”
“I can think of a few things that are worse.” He says with remorse in his eyes.
I choke back the lump in my throat. If he keeps this up, I may never be able to escape him.
“I thought what you said earlier was sweet, Logan. But you keep saying things that make my heart flutter.”
“I have a question for you Emily.”
“Ok?”
“Was it Justin who called you earlier?” I had to think for a minute.
“Yes.”
“Are you dating him?”
“Logan, do you think I would do that to someone else knowing how it feels?”
I hate that I had to just say that to him but it’s the truth.
“He looked awfully happy when I saw you together in the parking lot.”
“We work together at the deli and he was my first friend when I moved to Muncie.”
He snorts, “Friend?”
He is smiling so I decide to play along.
“Well you know how I like hot guys who drive big trucks.”
“How do you know how big his truck is?”
He doesn’t seem to be happily playing along anymore.
“I may have been around it a few times.” I wink at him and smile slyly.
He grabs me and pins me to the bed.
“Tell me you love me!”
Before he left for college, he would try to play this game all the time. I do what he says or else.
“You better not Logan, I will scream at the top of my lungs.” I say as he starts tickling my sides.
I am thrashing my arms and legs to try to get away from him. I am the most ticklish person I know. I start screaming, loud.
“No one is here to hear you, baby.”
I can tell he immediately regrets saying it because he stops and lies down and stares at the ceiling as he is remembering why no one is here.
After catching my breath, I turn to Logan, “Are you ready to go back to the hospital?”
“I think I’m going to just call Tyler to see what’s up.”
“Ok.”
He pulls out his phone and calls Tyler, “Hey man, any changes?”
He is very intent as he listens, “Yeah, ok. Em and I are just going to hang out here, let me know when we can take her home.”
“Ok, man. Later.”
He hangs up, stares off for a second, and then looks at me.
“They are going to let Mom out sometime tomorrow. She is getting her cast in the morning. There is still no change with Dad.”
He says with pain in his face and I run my hand up and down his back for comfort.
“Will she leave your dad, Logan?”
“I don’t think so. I don’t think I could leave you, if I were in the situation. Tyler and Shayla are coming back here for the night, the doctor told them that Mom needed to rest, and that he didn’t think anything would happen to Dad overnight. Just in case, though, Aunt Tina is coming to sit with them.”
It makes me feel better that Tina is going to be there with them. I know that we can do nothing for them and we all need to be rested because once Dee is released, we all need to pitch in and help. I just hope that Charles will wake up soon. I’m not sure how these boys would handle losing their dad.
I made my way to the kitchen. I’m sure that Tyler and Shay will be hungry, so I decided I would make us all dinner. I looked through the fridge and cabinets, and find that I have enough to make a salad and spaghetti. As I am putting the water on for the spaghetti, I hear Tyler and Shay come in the front door.
“Hey Logan, where’s Emily?” Shayla says to Logan.
“She is in the kitchen making all of us dinner.”
I hear Shay heading this way so I turn to the kitchen door as she comes in, she looks as bad as the rest of us.
“This is rough shit, watching them go through this.” Shay says as she hugs me.
“I know. The doctors didn’t have any good news about Charles?”
“No, they said he had so much trauma that it may take a while before he wakes up. Were you go
ing to tell me that you and Logan slept together?”
My eyes fly to her, “What?”
“Come on, Em, I’m not a dumbass.”
I look back at my pan of spaghetti sauce and smile.
“I KNEW IT!” Shay says and I look over at her and smile.
“I couldn’t help it. He is just so sad and I didn’t know any other way to make him feel better.”
“Was it awkward?”
“Maybe it should have been but no, it was amazing!”
Just then, the guys walk in.
“That smells amazing,” Tyler says putting his arm around Shay.
Logan comes up behind me, wraps his hands around my waist, and puts his head on my shoulder.
“Thanks for everything today.”
He kisses me on the top of the head as he moves to the fridge to get him and Tyler a beer. We all make our plates and Tyler asks Logan, “When you bringing all your stuff home from school?”
“I don’t know, I have to find a place to stay and obviously it also depends on Mom and Dad.”
“But you already started the paperwork in Muncie, right?”
That instantly gets Shay’s attention, “What the hell are you talking about?”
She says and Logan looks at me with a huge smile on his face.
Shayla also looks at me confused, “I am moving back and going to school with Em.”
Logan says and Shay’s jaw drops.
“I knew you guys slept together but Jesus I didn’t know you guys were moving in together this quick.”
Its Tyler’s turn to drop his jaw and Shayla yelps like Tyler kicked her under the table or something; Logan just winks at me.
“Well, Shayla, I am not moving in with Em and as far as us sleeping together, that is none of your business,” he says with a smile on his face.
“We’ll see,” Shay whispers to herself and starts eating again.
I finish and take my plate back to the kitchen and Shay follows me, she has her plate and the guys’ plates, as well.
“Emily Jenkins, what are you doing to yourself?”
“I know what I’m doing Shay.”