by Atul Todi
The shadow of the past always lingered in the house. The desire to drive big cars and live in a lavish bungalow, just like their extended family members did, caused a lot of heartache and arguments at home. They were never able to bury the skeleton of their past.
During his childhood, growing up in a middle-class family in India, every day was a struggle. While money didn't mean everything, yet everything revolved around it. The usual arguments and tension at home were always about money or due to the lack of it. It made the small, happy moments of his childhood less cheerful.
He despised those evenings as a child when his mom and dad fought and screamed. They wanted the best for their kids, but all that he wanted was to see his parents smile. Seeing them struggle to make ends meet, made him determined to get rich at any cost.
Even though he loved his parents to bits, he decided to leave home and work hard to make it big in life. With that goal in mind and faith in himself, he found a way to leave India and came to America, the land of opportunities. He told Tia that he hoped that once he became rich; he could get his parents everything they ever dreamt of. He wanted to make sure that money was never a reason for any tension in his family.
Their discussion was getting heavy, and alcohol wasn't helping much. To both their relief Jolly showed up with Miranda. Breaking away from the intense talk they were having, they ordered another round of Tequila shots to get the party back on.
One round turned to two, followed by ‘Yager Bombs', ‘Chocolate Cake', ‘Redhead Sluts' and ‘Irish Car Bombs'. Suddenly after the deep talks with Abhay, Tia forgot about her plan to not get too drunk; maybe she needed a few drinks to digest the sentimental family hoopla Abhay was telling her about.
She wanted to tell him that all the money in the world could not buy him happiness, but his conviction left her with no words. Abhay on the other hand felt stupid for telling her about his past, but she had a compulsive aura around her that made him speak. He could not believe how quickly he had opened up to her. It had never happened before.
From the bar, they soon moved to the dance floor, jamming to the latest tunes. Nathan, Charlie, along with the other girls, soon joined the crew and they took over the dance floor. Precious was the only one missing as she had already left with the guy she was making out with. Tia had messaged her to make sure she was ok; she replied back with a smiley.
All the girls decided that Precious would be fine and agreed to check on her after a couple of hours.
Charlie, who was quite inebriated by that time, was pulling out his Asian moves on the dance floor. Others followed him and soon it was a dance-off. Everyone started pulling out their best dance moves on the floor.
The night was getting crazier with people doing headspins, windmills and air-flares.
While everything was going fine, other men who were eyeing the beautiful ladies with Abhay and his friends soon joined in. They wanted to have a competition to make an impression. Friendly and welcoming, Abhay and his boys let them join.
They floor was getting heated up, and the guys in the other group started to get a little physical and abusive. Before a fight broke-out, the bouncers in the club, who had no problem with the group being loud, jumped into action. To keep the party going, they asked Abhay and his friends to move out to another room.
Nathan swore loudly that he would have broken all their faces for touching the women with him, Abhay tried to control him. Tia and her friends could not stop laughing. They knew that he was hardly the fighting type.
Peacefully, without any injuries, the party moved from the ‘Underground' to the ‘Darkroom'. It was another room in the club that was at the far end of the venue. With the DJ playing hip-hop, the place was going wild but was a lot less crowded. It had a Caribbean shack theme, with fake palm trees and a colourful tropical décor.
Wearing skimpy clothes, the bartenders were dressed like colourful samba dancers. They were happily giving out special red and yellow shots in test-tubes. Inviting guests to climb up on the bar table, they enticed them to take alcohol shots from between their breasts.
Everyone did it happily, and some like Tia had to be forced to do it.
No one looked in their senses; drugs were flowing freely. Everyone danced without a worry; it was all about living in the moment. Soon enough, Nathan was making out with Sophie in one corner of the club and Charlie danced with Miranda in the other corner. Jolly and Abhay stood at the bar with Alex and Tia. They were asking the bartender to experiment with some cocktails. The latest jam by Ludacris was blaring in the background.
Out of nowhere, Tia who had metamorphosed from a nerd to something more seductive for the night, pulled Abhay closer and said in her cute American accent, "Hustling, grinding, banging, rolling, rocking, riding: that's all that I can hear. Don't you wish they played some Punjabi, ‘balle-shalle' music here? That would be so awesome."
She was a true ‘desi’ at heart: after some alcohol, there had to be Indian hip-shaking music.
Tia was quite drunk and Abhay wanted to make sure she had a good time. So he stepped away and went to the DJ booth. Tipping the DJ, he convinced him to play the song ‘Mundiya Tu Bach Ke Rahi' by Jay-Z, followed by another couple of Indian fusion songs that the DJ had in his collection.
The music brought a change in the tempo at the ‘Underground'. Taking people by surprise, who looked at the DJ with a confused look, it brought everyone to a stand-still. Soon the high-tempo beats of the ‘Punjabi' songs got everyone grooving again. Maybe it was the free flowing alcohol in the club that made sure no one complained, but it surely made Tia happy. She was out of control.
Teaching people Punjabi steps, Tia looked ecstatic. She was a proud Indian, who loved her ‘desi’ music and ‘Bollywood’ dancing. Whatever it was, she was not the quite introverted girl from the library anymore.
Watching her from the side, Abhay could not help but smile. She looked like a happy soul that was not chained by unnecessary human obligations and prejudice. Unlike all the women he had been running after, she was simple and sweet. She was someone who was uncomplicated.
As he stood there, happily watching her, she came and pulled him to the dance floor. Bringing out some of the ‘bollywood' dance moves, she made him shake like he was back in New Delhi, dancing in the bylanes of ‘Daryaganj' with her. With fingers in the air, hips moving side to side and feet thumping on the floor, it was completely insane. College students from all over the US, the conservative white folks and the loud African-Americans, joined in without any shame. It was diversity at its best.
Tia had taken over the dance floor. They danced, screamed, drank, and repeated it until it started raining outside.
Even with the loud music blasting in the background, Tia was able to hear the rain pouring on the wooden patio outside. Pulling Abhay away from the group, she took him out through the backdoor.
The wooden patio led to a beachfront that was empty. Everyone had dispersed from the beach once it started raining. Taking off her heels, she jumped and splashed around in the rain. With no one around, she had the wooden deck all to herself.
Hiding under a big canopy, Abhay tried in vain to stay dry and tell her to get back inside. All Tia could hear was the rain beating down on the wooden planks.
Abhay had never seen anyone that happy to see it rain; just watching her from a distance was magical. She was not worried about her makeup anymore; she did not care that her body was showing through her wet dress.
While she called him to come join her, he refrained and pleaded her to get back inside. With no real fascination for rain, he wanted to stay dry and did not want to fall sick. Ignoring his request, she came and pulled him out to the middle of the deck. He had no option but to join her, getting wet while she danced like a child.
Finally, catching hold of her, he stopped her. Grabbing her by her shoulder, he held her still as the rain crashed down on the deck. Looking into her eyes, he told her not to speak. He could feel her breath heavily as she stared back at him.
Moving the hair away from her face, he tucked it behind her ear and his fingers felt her burning skin. Watching the rain flow down her soft lips, he brought his face closer, just inches away from her face.
Right when he was about to kiss her, with a naughty smile on her face, she said, "You promised something."
Confused, all he could say was, "What? Promised you something, really?"
She broke the trance he was in; that moment was way too romantic for him to handle.
"I want to get high and I want to do it with you." Tia said with a puppy face.
Just thinking about that moment, Abhay could not help but smile. He had goosebumps on his arms. His hands were shaking, as if he had been holding Tia a few moments back. His throat felt dry and his lips moist, anticipating that kiss in the rain many-many years ago.
Snapping out of this trance, he looked around. It was a lonely night; there was no rain on the wooden deck, and there was no Tia. It had been ages since that night in Florida. Nothing remained the same. He had changed and she was long gone.
Khushi had fallen asleep on the beanbag, listening to his stories. She looked at peace, as she lay there. With a smile on her face, she held on to her little pink notebook on which she had been taking note. Curious about what she had been writing for the past couple of days, Abhay could not stop himself from taking a peek inside. He quietly pulled the notebook and glanced at it.
As he browsed through the last few pages, he saw that instead of writing notes, she had been doodling his little adventurous story. His pen-stick figure had a shaggy beard and long hair; he had been given a funny cowboy outfit to fit his demeanor. Tia was made to look like a princess, with beautiful hair, a halo above her head, big eyes and perfect long nose. Precious was intentionally made to look seductive with a short skirt, high heels, sunglasses and extra big lips. Jolly, on the other hand, was made into a fat guy with protruding chin and a baseball cap.
Khushi had a very vivid and funny imagination. It was clearly evident from her sketching out the scenes with details. Even though some of her doodles looked extremely funny, she had captured the essence of his story.
Before Abhay could browse through the whole notebook, Khushi seemed to be waking up. She was sleep-talking: "Mommy, don't you worry. He is a really nice guy; you have to meet him. You won't believe how funny he is."
He was glad she found him funny; he had lost that aspect of his life long time ago.
With his eyes tearing up, and heart filled with emotions, he picked her up and took her to the guest room. He wondered if she was for real. She came from thin air, making him relive the past he had buried a long time ago. Putting her to bed, he tucked her under a blanket, kept her notebook on the side and left.
She made him miss having a family. Suddenly, the bachelorhood he had always prized so highly, did not feel too great. He felt lonely and sad, sitting in the middle of a vineyard, with no one to share his life with.
That night, after finishing a bottle of wine that he had recently blended, high on emotions, he called Anna. He missed not having her around and talking to her. Even though she was often high-headed and very work-focused, she got him. Amongst all the other women who came and went, she was the only one who had the courage to stay back and deal with his bizarre nature. Above everything else, she gave him his privacy. Not intruding in his private life, she refrained from asking questions about his family and past. She accepted him for the way he was, with all his faults.
She was compatible with him and he pretended to be compatible with none. In any case, their little business proposition worked for both of them. He was lonely and she had a reason to stick around on the vineyard, giving him company.
Happy to have a companion for the lonely nights, he wanted nothing more. She just did not kindle that spark for him to think otherwise. On the other hand, even though she had only been around for a few months, she had expressed her love for him. Being outspoken, when she wanted something, she was not scared to express herself.
She was open about her love for him. She had even mentioned that she wouldn't mind moving in with him and getting married. Pretending that she was joking when she had brought it up, he had put the matter to rest.
Running away from the topic of marriage, he stayed clear of any commitment. His criterion was very clear: she was more than welcome to live with him and grow the wine business, but he was not ready for a relationship.
He was not ready until that evening.
After Khushi made him reminisce his past and think about Tia, he felt desolate and miserable. Someone to share his feelings with seemed like a good idea; someone to live and die for seemed reasonable.
Maybe it was the wine causing the emotional turmoil inside him, but not thinking too much about it, impulsively he called Anna and proposed. Asking her to marry him, he told her how much he liked her.
After a few moments of silence and to his surprise, she said yes!
CHAPTER 7: BECOMING FRIENDS
Next morning Khushi woke up early and decided to wake Abhay up. Being completely obnoxious, she sneaked inside his room, sat next to his bed and irritated him. Tickling his bearded face with a twig, she chuckled and watched him get annoyed.
Telling Khushi to go away and play outside, he tried to tuck himself inside his blanket. He wanted to sleep; he had been up till late talking to Anna, who was elated to hear about his change of heart. To her delight, Abhay wanted to get married.
Thinking about Anna and the proposal from last night, Abhay sat up straight on his bed with a shock on his face. He could not believe what he had done in his drunken stupor.
The night before, thinking about his past and chugging down a bottle of wine had gotten him all irrational. He was lonely and had started liking Anna, but marriage was a whole different ball game. He did not want to get married, even the thought of it scared him.
Staring at the wall in front, he felt weak - a feeling he had buried somewhere deep since the time he lost Tia. In that silence, the blank wall closed in on him. His lonely future flashed in front of his eyes.
He had to take a chance and let go of the shackles he had put on himself. Looking at Khushi’s reassuring smile, he knew that it was possible. Smiling back at her, he convinced himself that what he did in his drunken stupor was for his own good.
Deciding to give his sudden decision some time to sink in, he tried to stay calm. Meanwhile, Khushi watched him with a confused look.
Getting out of bed, Abhay chased Khushi to the garden outside.
It had rained the previous night and it was still cloudy that morning. Cold wind blowing down from the hills that surrounded the valley made it chilly outside.
Running around in the muddy soil, they both got their feet dirty. Before he could catch hold of her, she picked up the water hose and sprayed him with cold water.
Khushi was a naughty little girl, but full of life. She made Abhay feel like he had known her for years. With her around, he felt like a different person. He felt alive.
He had not laughed that much in years, not since he left Tia. Lying on the wet muddy grass, with Khushi spraying him with cold water, he just smiled. At that moment, watching the little angel in disguise, he wondered if marrying Anna could fill the void that Tia had left behind.
Later that morning, he made her breakfast and took her to the vineyard. The plan was to put up some trenches for the vine sapling they had planted the other day. Digging up the soil, they also had to make sure that it was well aerated for the plant to grow.
Toiling through the day, they worked hard, and Khushi enjoyed doing the manual labor on the vineyard. She liked being around Abhay and helping him out. While working beside him, she told him about her school, her friends and the boy she liked.
He was a white boy, an American with Spanish descend. He was in her class and played basketball. He had dark brown eyes, just like Abhay and dreamy copper coloured hair. He smiled at her whenever he saw her, but never said anything. She too just looked at him and hoped that
one day he would come up to her and say something. She went to watch his basketball games and he snuck around during her dance classes.
She was not sure if it was love, but she knew she liked him.
Amused by her story, Abhay told her that when he was her age, it was all about getting perfect scores in his exams. He was very nerdy back in high school; girls did not even exist in his dictionary. If he was not memorizing theories or solving complex mathematical problems, he was out on the field playing. It was only when he reached college that he discovered women.
While he did not want her to follow his example, he told her to focus on her grades in school. Telling her that boys would come and go, he tried to convince her that she was too young to worry about high school crushes.