by Atul Todi
Removing his shoes, Khushi tucked him in under a blanket. Sitting by his side, she felt bad for him; yet, she could not help but smile thinking about the deep love he had for Tia and wondered if she too continued to love him.
It was a Sunday morning, and Khushi wanted to surprise Abhay. She decided to call her mom and ask for a little help. Calling her on Skype, she asked for the recipe for her favorite Indian breakfast – ‘halwa' and ‘chhole '. She told her mom that it was for a special friend she had met.
Khushi told her mother that her friend had lost the one he loved and was upset. So in order to cheer him up, she wanted to cook him an awesome breakfast.
Her mother was a little confused, but she played along.
Khushi was not sure if Abhay would have liked what she was going to cook, but she wanted to make it anyways. So the whole morning, while he slept, Khushi and her mom worked in the kitchen. Her mother, live on Skype, instructed her on how to go about with the cooking.
Luckily Anna had arranged Abhay's kitchen very well; everything was labeled in both English and Hindi for her convenience. Indian cuisine being one of Anna's favorite, she was learning to cook and had made sure every possible ingredient she could need was available.
Khushi worked on the ‘halwa' and ‘chhole' simultaneously. ‘Halwa', a form of sweet Indian pudding, was made with semolina; ‘chhole' was made with brown chickpeas. Fortunately, semolina, labeled as ‘suji', was there in the kitchen cupboard and chickpeas, which Anna liked to put in her salad, was kept in the fridge.
Khushi did as her mom instructed. First, she put some butter in a pan and allowed it to get heated. Then she added one cup of semolina to it and allowed it to fry on low heat. She had to wait until its colour started to change, and it gave a lovely nutty aroma.
Meanwhile, to make ‘chhole' she had to put a tablespoon of mustard oil into a non-stick pan, add cumin seeds (‘jeera') to it and allow it to get tempered in hot oil. Next she had to add a spoon of ginger-garlic paste into the pan and allow it to sauté for a minute until the raw smell of garlic was gone. Once the paste was ready, she had to add the boiled chickpeas to the pan, cover it and allow it to cook for a while.
Allowing the ‘chhole' to cook, Khushi then poured two cups of milk, one cup of sugar, a handful of raisins, cashews and a pinch of saffron to a blender and created a thick milky paste. That delicious looking paste was then slowly added to the semolina that had turned golden by then. Khushi's mom told her to continuously stir the semolina to make sure it was evenly cooked, and the milk was consistently absorbed.
Smiling, Khushi's mother watched her little girl cook for the first time. She teased her about her special friend, but Khushi would not tell her a word. She told her mom that she would tell her about him once she was back in the US.
Once the ‘halwa' was well cooked and smelled delicious, Khushi was instructed to add some cardamom powder to it and mix it well. Then she had to cover the pan and set it on low heat, to allow it to steam for five minutes.
Going back to the ‘chhole', Khushi added a few spices to the chickpeas: a spoon of red chili powder, some ‘garam-masala', half a spoon of turmeric and coriander powder, and a quarter spoon of salt. Mixing up the ingredients in the pan, she poured a cup of water into the mix and allowed it to cook for a bit. Finally, she chopped a handful of green chilies, onions and fresh coriander and put it into the steaming pan.
Letting it all cook on low heat for another ten minutes, delicious ‘chhole' was ready. Taking a whiff of her fine creation, she felt like a master-chef.
Putting the ‘halwa' into a bowl, she garnished it with dry-fruits. Putting the ‘chhole' into another bowl, she added chopped green coriander on top and squeezed some lemon on it. It looked perfect; just like her mom would make every Sunday.
Her special Sunday breakfast, with a glass of steaming milk, was ready to be served. She laid it out in front of Abhay, who lay on the couch like a dead log. As she expected, the titillating aroma of the ‘halwa' & ‘chhole' did the magic. Sniffing like a dog, he woke up with a surprise on his face. Pushing back his hair, he rubbed his eye in disbelief. For a second, he felt a decade younger, as if he was still back in college and Tia had surprised him with a sumptuous breakfast, to help him fight his hangover.
"Halwa-chhole, it smells so good Khushi. Did you really make this or am I still dreaming?" Abhay was pleasantly surprised.
He had not had ‘halwa-chhole' for a very long time, not since he left the US.
Greedily filling his plate, he could hardly stop himself. Khushi sat beside him, waiting to know how the breakfast had turned out to be.
"Is this you bribing me to continue with my story? You know you did not have to do this, I would have told you anyway."
She just smiled and said, "I know. I just wanted to."
"I am glad you did; you have no idea, how much I have missed this. But how did you make it so good?"
"You can thank my mom later; she helped me make it."
Abhay looked around wondering what the hell Khushi was talking about. Her mom could not have come there in such a short time period.
"She helped me over Skype; she is not here. As for the story, I can't wait for you to continue." Khushi was in no rush; she enjoyed watching a grown man eating his breakfast like a little kid.
Relishing the ‘halwa’, Abhay thought about how strange was it for Khushi to know his favorite breakfast. Without him ever telling her, Khushi intuitively knew a lot about his likes and dislikes.
Sometimes Khushi did things and responded in ways that made Abhay think about Tia. She didn’t look anything like her, but had an uncanny resemblance.
After breakfast, Abhay decided to take Khushi out to show her around the area. Taking out his Wrangler Jeep, they drove towards ‘Thekkady', a serene, isolated hill-station, in the middle of nowhere. Going past chains of green meandering hills and spice plantations, they both sat quietly and enjoyed the heavenly view.
On that adventurous drive, two strangers sat next to each other wondering how weird it was to be there. An old heart-broken winemaker was being accompanied by a stubborn teenager searching for an unknown writer. They both had no reason to be together, but fate had its own plans.
Abhay was lost in thoughts, as if he was trying to find where to restart the story he had been narrating to Khushi. She, on the other hand, putting aside her teenage curiosity, had started to feel sympathetic towards him and waited patiently for him to begin.
Crossing over from Tamil Nadu border, they entered Kerala. The smooth four-lane highways suddenly turned into single lane dirt roads. Twisting and turning across meandering hills, the ride became bumpy.
Pointing towards a road sign, Abhay told Khushi: "Welcome to Kerala: God’s own Country."
Located at the Southern tip of India, Kerala was popular for its backwaters, beautiful landscape and old traditions. The air there had a strange lullaby. It made both Abhay and Khushi sing old Indian classical tracks. Abhay was surprised that Khushi knew those songs.
They drove for a couple of hours towards the west, past thick and dense forests, beautiful backwaters, and small hamlets scattered amidst the wilderness.
Finally, going off-road he drove a few kilometers through a misty jungle. Abhay had been there before and knew exactly where he was headed. Khushi put on her seat belt, making sure she did not fall out of the car.
It was a bumpy ride through unchartered territory, not meant for the weak-hearted. It lasted for almost 30 minutes.
Coming out from the dark forest, they came upon a deserted riverbank. Wet soil and the receding waterline showed that the area had been flooded in the recent past. The water level had subsided since, leaving behind a serene beach.
The sun was beating down in full force while lonely patches of smoky white cloud lingered around the blue sky. Cool wind continued to blow across the entire area, bringing with it a taste of fresh coffee from the plantations on the other side of the forest. Smiling at Abhay, Khushi said, “This is
truly ‘God’s own country'.”
Walking up to the shallow river, they both washed their feet and splashed cold water on their faces. It was refreshing.
Taking a swig from his scotch flask, Abhay told Khushi that it was the Periyar River; he often came there when he was very depressed. It had a special place in his heart and a strong connection to his past.
While the place was immensely beautiful, like an artist had painted nature in full-glory, there was a reason why Abhay took Khushi there.
Sitting on the hood of the car, he gave her some juice to drink and continued his story from where he left; she patiently took notes.
Life was like a whirlpool back then. He was young, naïve and full of energy. Chasing his dreams, he thought the world was his to conquer. It wasn't that he was too proud or full of himself, he just had tremendous faith in himself. Bubbling with confidence, it seemed like his destiny to build the next big technology company.
Convinced about his plan, he rejected his six-figure salary job offers and decided to move back to India. His idea was solid, and the timing was perfect. He had the right people willing to work with him and make the project a reality. As for the funding, he had been saving up for a few years, and it was enough to get started in India. The plan was to raise external capital once they had a basic demo product ready.
India was brimming with opportunities and he had to get the ‘most viable product’ ready to test his idea.
In those days, online social networks were growing rapidly, and the opportunity was huge. If he implemented his plans, he was going to change the way people shopped around the world. The magnitude of his idea was so immense that even if it was not a big success, he would have made millions of dollars.
"Everything seemed right when I left for India." He said with a sad look on his face.
Khushi asked, "So what happened? I am sure you didn't do it just for the money."
"You are too young to understand and I don't know why am I telling you all this. But no, it wasn't just for the money. It just felt like the only thing I wanted to do back then, it was a deep inner urge. My startup was all I thought about when I was awake or asleep. I thought it would make me happy and I was willing to risk everything for it. She knew that!"
Abhay felt emotional. He had not shared his story with anyone. He never wanted to tell anyone what happened to him after he left the US. Still, he went ahead and told the little girl who looked genuinely concerned for him.
Pulling out a picture from the photo album they had carried along, he showed her a picture of him in a black gown with his graduation certificate. Tia was standing right next to him with a smile on her face.
After knowing Tia for about a year, it was time to leave. He graduated from his MBA program at the end of the spring semester. While the rest of his batch students celebrated the awesome jobs they had bagged, he was thrilled about his plans.
Everyone told him that it was a foolish move. They insisted that he should go ahead and take a job, it was not a good time to take risks. The global economy was not doing too well; a good job was the right option for him. They advised that once he was well-settled and had enough money in the bank, he should risk running a startup.
If there was anyone who believed in him more than he did in himself, it was her. She was the only one who stood by him. She could see the passion in his eyes and had faith in his capabilities. Like a fool, she too believed he had a destiny to fulfill. Hiding her feelings, she encouraged him to do what made him happy.
Pointing at the picture, Abhay told Khushi that, on his graduation day, Tia got him a beautiful bouquet of yellow carnation and wished him all the luck in the world. She cheered loudly when the college President handed him his degree and even organized a farewell party.
In the picture, the sadness she was hiding was evident in her eyes. The layers of makeup on her face made it apparent that she had been crying all night. She knew that once he left, chances of them being together was slim. But she was willing to risk it all to see him happy.
While she did not bring up the topic, he didn't see how the distance between them would change their friendship. They were still going to be in touch and do everything like they did before.
They would remain good friends.
At that moment, he was only thinking about their friendship, not realizing that she wanted something more. She wanted to love him and hold him; she wanted him to be there with her on her happy days and be beside her on the cold nights. She wanted him to love her and be with her. But, she was not the one to force herself on him. For her, it was more important that he willingly stayed back with her.
She loved him the way he was and had no intentions to change him at any cost. Being a purist in romance, instead of making him realise that he too loved her and if he left it would not be possible for them to be together, she held on to her belief:
‘If you love someone truly, you have to let them go.
If they come back to you, then that love is truly yours.'
Deep inside, she wanted him to realise that happiness came from small things and not by chasing big dreams. She wished and prayed that he would change his mind and stay back with her in the US. Yet, she could not find the courage inside her to make a man so determined to reach his goal, to give up on his vision for love.
She just could not do it, no matter how hard she tried.
She had only known him for little over a year and hoped it would not take more than a month to forget all about him. Convincing herself that love was just a fantasy, she told herself that once Abhay was gone, given enough time, her heart would learn to live without him.
She saw him off at the airport and wished him luck. They promised to stay in touch at all cost. He told her that she was the best friend he had, and he won't let anything change that. She, on the other hand, besides advising him to be careful with trusting people, kept her emotions in check. Deep inside, she waited for him to at least for once admit that he too loved her and they were more than just friends.
She waited for him to say those three words: "I love you." It did not happen and he left for India.
Those words meant nothing to him back then. He was unabashedly selfish: it was all about his dreams, his life, and his goals. He did not realise that he was unintentionally breaking someone else's heart.
Between the long hugs and tearful see-off, he did not realise what a big mistake he was making. Once he left her and got on that one-way flight, AI 126, from Chicago to New Delhi, there was no turning back. Things were not going to be the same ever again.
He was twenty-five back then, leaving the US, the land of opportunities, to become an entrepreneur. It was a big risk. Giving up a promising career, he moved back to India to build his technology startup. None of his friends thought it was a good idea; everyone laughed at him. Even his family was aghast; they were completely against his plan. His mother cried and told him to stay back and focus on a career. His father tried to reason with him, giving him his personal example and the failure he faced in doing business. His elder brother, while not too supportive, did understand his plan but told him to work for a few years, save up some money, before starting something of his own.
No one could convince him to change his mind; he was stubborn. His heart was set on his plan; he wanted to take a chance. He knew that if things did not work out, he could always go back and find a job.
While it sounded like a stupid idea to put everything at stake, he was willing to take the risk. Maybe it was overconfidence; maybe it was his strong conviction in his plans. Whatever it was, he was back in India, anxious and full of hope.
Once back in India, to get started, he needed to put together a team of developers and designers. Luckily he had the first step sorted out: he found a co-founder who was a technology expert, someone who could help him with building the perfect product.
He wanted someone who he could trust. So he had been talking to one of his distant cousins, Vivek, who he had known for a few years.
They had met a few times in New York when Vivek was working there. They had been discussing about building a technology startup together for almost a year.
Abhay shared his business plan with him under confidentiality and Vivek was convinced. Both of them quit their jobs and moved back to India.
Besides being a smart guy with a computer science degree from the prestigious Indian Institute of Technology, Vivek had worked with Amazon and Intel for a couple of years. He had the right skills and mindset to build a startup. Above everything else, he saw the potential in Abhay's vision and was willing to risk his career by moving back to India. His faith in the idea made Abhay trust him and willing to partner with him.
Vivek quit his job and joined Abhay in Mumbai to get started. While Abhay provided the initial fund, they both invested their time to build the next big thing in the tech industry. Without any backup or a fallback plan, they both quickly, but quietly worked towards their vision.