A Memory Away

by Melinda Curtis

  “You heard me. Both of you. Eat.” She’d eat mash if it meant there’d be peace.

  Baby squirmed, but then stilled, perhaps realizing Jess wasn’t to be messed with on this point.

  The two neighbors exchanged sullen glances, and then did as they’d been told.

  Just as they sat down to eat, there was another knock on the door.

  It was the sheriff. He wore his familiar rain slicker and ball cap. He surveyed the group, making note of the dog with a raised brow. “Cal-Trans says they’re opening the road in a few hours.”

  Duffy looked at Jess. Jess looked at Duffy.

  She wanted to say, I’m not ready to leave.

  She liked it here with Eunice barging in, Duffy pretending he wanted to be a bachelor, one who didn’t care for his brother, and a town that was equal parts nosy and nurturing. She liked his grumpy front, the one that hid his considerate side. And she especially liked the way he kissed.

  Seeing as how the people in the room seemed to be waiting for Jess to respond, her pregnant brain made an intelligent response. “Oh.”

  Duffy opened his mouth, then closed it, possibly to save himself from the embarrassment of a similarly astute remark.

  Nate nodded, as if understanding everything that hadn’t been said. “Whose dog?”

  “We don’t know.” Duffy stared at his four-legged companion, the one perched on his toe. “It showed up last night.”

  “No one’s reported a dog missing.” As usual, Nate was a step ahead of everyone. “You might take it to the vet to see if it’s been microchipped.” His gaze landed on their plates. “Fried cornmeal mash. Tastes better with Eunice’s marshmallow glaze and lots of milk.”

  Baby squirmed doubtfully.

  “Now there’s a man with good taste and imagination.” Eunice blessed the sheriff with a big smile and several wide-eyed blinks.

  Nate promised to call when the roads were open, and then left.

  “Dig in,” Eunice said. “There’s plenty more.”

  “That’s what I’m afraid of,” Duffy said under his breath.

  Jess poked his arm. “Behave.”

  Duffy sighed the sigh of the defeated and took a bite of the red corn-bread-ish meal. He chewed slowly, made a pleased sound, swallowed and then gave Jess the fakest smile she’d ever seen. “Yum. You’ve got to try it.”

  “And you doubted me,” Eunice said before taking a dainty bite. “There’s hope for you yet.”

  Jess narrowed her eyes at Duffy, deciding she wouldn’t tell him how the mush looked on his teeth. “Is it spicy? Baby doesn’t like spicy.”

  Eunice swallowed. “I remove the jalapeño seeds and then soak them in pineapple juice. Tones down the heat.”

  Jess’s curiosity got the better of her. “Do you use the juice to make the mush?”

  “Certainly. Sweetens up the batter.”

  Corn bread was already sweet. Jess took a nibble. It was almost too sweet. And then there was a mild hit of heat as she swallowed, but it wasn’t an overwhelming heat. “How interesting.”

  “I told you. Mama was ahead of her time.” Eunice bent her head and got to eating.

  The dog whined, a genteel reminder that she had yet to be fed.

  “It’s chicken for you, girl.” Duffy reached down and ruffled her hair, perhaps without even realizing it.

  There was one less thing for Jess to worry about. That dog had found a home, for sure.

  “What’s the dog’s name?” Eunice asked, wiping red crumbs from her lips.

  “Only her owners know. She doesn’t have tags.” Duffy. Always intent upon distancing himself from others.

  “She needs a name,” Eunice insisted.

  “Dog works.” Duffy moved to the kitchen and prepared her a breakfast of shredded chicken mixed with cottage cheese.

  The pup gobbled it up, licked the bowl clean, belched and gave him the soulful-eye treatment until he fed her more.

  “You can’t call her Dog,” Eunice said when he returned to the table. “That’s like calling Jessica ‘Pregnant Lady.’”

  Duffy grinned mischievously, showing the effects of eating red mash by his now not-so-bright smile.

  “Don’t you dare,” Jess warned, liking that grin far too much.

  Could she kiss him again? Just once without ruining things for Baby?

  Sadly not.

  “When it comes to that beast, Dog will do.” Duffy stared at his plate. “Did I really eat the whole thing?”

  “Yep,” Eunice gloated. “There’s enough for seconds.”

  He pressed a fist to his chest as if removing an air bubble; more likely it was to tease Eunice. “Let’s see if it tastes as good in an hour as it did going down.”

  “Ignoramus.”

  “Snoop.”

  They were both smiling, although not at each other.

  Jess took a sip of milk, swishing it around her mouth. “Her hair is the color of golden champagne.”

  Duffy rolled his eyes. “Dog has more of a beer appetite.”

  “You can’t call her Dog.” Jess reached down to pat the pup’s little head. “You should call her Goldie.”

  The sweetheart swept her fanned tail across the floor.

  “I’m not keeping her.” Duffy’s voice firmed up harder than overdone shortbread. “If I can’t find her owners, I’m sure a shelter can find her a good home.”

  “You wouldn’t.” Eunice stared at him in near horror, forgetting to blink.

  Jess was afraid he would do exactly that. He was the most infuriating man, thinking he could go on with this solo act. He needed friends. But not her. She’d be family. She couldn’t pretend that not talking about the kiss would make it slip through the cracks. The big-girl panties would need to be put on after Eunice left.

  “I’m sure she’s microchipped,” Duffy continued with the hard-hearted dog-rejecter routine. “As soon as the veterinary clinic opens, we’ll take her in.”

  “All of us?” Eunice perked up.

  “Jess and me,” Duffy said firmly. “Don’t press your luck.”

  “I feel compelled to tell you,” Jess said, wanting to knock Duffy off his very tall pedestal, “the cornmeal mash made our teeth red.” She smiled, baring every molar, which she was sure were as red as Eunice’s and Duffy’s.

  Eunice gasped. “Maybe that was why Mama stopped putting food coloring in the mash.”

  “Did you put food coloring in this? In addition to the red gelatin?” There was resignation in Duffy’s voice.

  Eunice didn’t answer. She didn’t have to.

  They all knew she had.

  * * *

  IT TOOK DUFFY an hour to get rid of Eunice, during which time his dad called and asked if he could meet Jessica. “I’ll call you back.” Duffy had no idea how long Jess would stay after they opened up the road.

  Sunlight broke through the clouds and the kitchen window, bathing Jess in dust-moted rays. Her skin glowed. She hummed happy notes that filled his small house. How easy it was to picture her here permanently. His gut clenched at the thought.

  I don’t want to be tied down.

  Duffy leaned in the kitchen doorway, the golden pup at his feet. “You don’t have to leave right away, do you?”

  Jess faced him. Instead of her soft smile, there was a crease to her brow. “Staying is a bad idea.” She wiped her hands dry on a dish towel, unaware her words had clenched his gut another notch. “You don’t really want me to stay. Just like you don’t want Eunice hanging around, or a dog or cat.”

  He’d expected her to look like Goldie, big eyes that silently begged to stay with the promise of more kisses. Her reaction threw him. He forgot for a moment that he was working his way up to asking her to stay later today, not stay forever, and went into
defensive mode. “I have my reasons for wanting to be alone.”

  She gestured as if indicating he should share those reasons with her.

  “After fifteen years of scrimping and sacrificing, I want a life of my own.”

  She should have looked away, should have looked sad, or heartsick. They’d kissed, after all. And it’d been a knee-quaking kiss. Instead, she crossed her arms and stared at him like a traffic cop stares down a speeder. “If you won’t say it, I will. We kissed. It was an interesting experiment—”

  “Experiment?” he sputtered, gut knotting near the base of his spine now.

  “—but I’m like you. I’m not looking for a wedding date or a baby daddy. I’m happy to have you in my life as Baby’s uncle.”

  Relief. He waited for it to unknot the knots in his gut. It didn’t come.

  “You have this foolish idea,” she continued, “that life owes you a responsibility-free period because you’ve had some struggles.”

  The word foolish bounced around Duffy’s head like a ricocheting bullet seeking a target.

  “But by virtue of having a job and renting a house, you have responsibilities.” Jess rubbed the side of her stomach. The sun slipped behind a cloud and the kitchen fell to shadow. “As someone who came from nothing and has no one, you don’t know how lucky you are. You have the luxury of sitting down for coffee with your neighbors, of helping out a friend after a storm, of having a loyal dog who loves you.”

  Duffy rubbed his forehead.

  “So, no. I won’t stay. I like you, Duff. But the next man I let into my personal life is going to be interested in having a family.” Her composure slipped. The hurt he’d expected bled into her words. “And that’s not you.”

  The bullet struck home, unknotting knots. Duffy rubbed his forehead once more. There was still no sense of relief, no feeling that the freedom from financial woes was protected. There was only a sense of disappointment.

  His gaze drifted to her stomach, her lips and then the no-holds-barred honesty in her eyes. Fifteen years. He’d wanted fifteen burden-free years in exchange. This feeling that he was missing something was only a by-product of their kiss. Once Jess left, once his memory of the kiss faded, once they limited contact to birthdays and holidays, he’d be fine. “My parents want to drive out as soon as the roads are open. They want to meet you.”

  “Today?” Jess curled an arm around her belly.

  “Why not today? The vineyards are too muddy to work in. My mom’s off and you don’t have to be at work until tomorrow.”

  “Okay.” But it was a reluctant agreement. “I’ll leave after we visit.”

  “Thank you.” He should shake her hand or pat her shoulder, establish some distance, although not the awkward one they’d just achieved. There was one other olive branch to extend. “Do you want to come with me to the vet’s office?”

  Her eyes narrowed. “You’re only inviting me because you think I’ll adopt her.”

  “Dog loves you.” He had to remind himself not to use the name Eunice and Jessica had given her.

  “Goldie loves you more. And once you realize that, you’ll keep her.”

  They drove to the vet’s office. Goldie rode on the truck’s center console as if she’d been riding in trucks all her life. For such a froufrou-looking dog, she had chutzpah.

  The vet’s office was small. There were cats in carriers, slanted eyes peering out suspiciously. Someone had a guinea pig in a large shoe box. A man with an overweight dachshund sat in the corner reading a magazine.

  Despite not having a leash or a collar, Goldie sat quietly between Duffy’s feet. She didn’t growl or shake. She looked as if she were used to being around other animals every day. Ho-hum. Someone had done an excellent job training her and was probably heartbroken that they’d lost her.

  An old man with wild white hair, bushy white eyebrows and thick glasses sat behind the counter. After about thirty minutes, he called their names. Duffy carried Goldie forward.

  After Duffy explained they’d found her, the old man took her from his arms. “We’ll see if she’s microchipped. I’ve never seen this dog before. And I’ve been a vet here for decades.”

  After a few more minutes’ wait, a much younger man returned with Goldie and introduced himself. “I’m Dr. Jamero. She’s not microchipped. I checked reports of lost animals with the shelters in Cloverdale and Santa Rosa. No dog fitting her description has been reported missing.”

  “What does that mean?” Duffy asked, although the sinking feeling in his gut knew what it meant.

  “The last stray that turned up here was reclaimed within two weeks.” Dr. Jamero transferred Goldie into Duffy’s arms. “If she wasn’t abandoned, someone will claim her soon. You can keep her until then, can’t you?”

  He’d been wanting to take off next weekend and drive up the coast. Just him and his truck, with no schedule. A dog changed all that. Even a temporary dog.

  “He can keep her until her owners show up,” Jess answered for him.

  Duffy didn’t argue.

  Jess was wearing her own clothes today. Jeans and a red sweater. She looked like a woman with her act together. No one would suspect she’d grown up on the streets, or been romanced out of her savings, or that she’d lost a chunk of her memories. She was a strong woman. Again, Duffy wondered why Greg had chosen her.

  Lacking answers, Duffy turned away from her. “How much do I owe you?” he asked the old man behind the desk.

  “Nothing. It’s on the house.” When Duffy arched a brow because nothing was free, the old man added, “We do, however, sell dog food, collars and leashes.”

  Duffy bought a bag of dog food, a leather leash and a gold rhinestone-studded collar that Jess couldn’t stop admiring. His purchases would go with the dog, of course. As soon as her owners showed up.

  CHAPTER THIRTEEN

  THE CLOUDS WERE SPARSE, but large, and blocked the sun for several minutes as they walked out of the vet’s.

  The most recent cloud to pass overhead made everything in the clinic’s parking lot seem gloomy. Jess shivered and shoved her hands in her jacket pockets. Duffy hadn’t argued with anything Jess had said about who he was or what he wanted from life. She hadn’t realized how much she’d wanted him to want her until he’d stood there as distant as the clouds. Sadness sat like a lump in her throat. She should have been excited that Duffy’s parents wanted to meet her. Today. Without delay. But she couldn’t shake the sense that she’d already lost something, something she wouldn’t gain by meeting them.

  “What now?” Duffy asked, sounding irritated, as he pulled into his driveway.

  Agnes stood in front of a dated green Buick parked at the curb. Rose and Mildred waved from behind foggy windows. Eunice stood on Duffy’s front steps, a rain-slickered guard who still had a lopsided hairdo.

  “We came to show Jessica the town.” Agnes was wearing the welcome-mat smile.

  Jess took it at face value and smiled back.

  “Why are you going to show her around?” Duffy the killjoy was back, ignoring the little dog bounding happily across the grass to greet Agnes.

  “So she can grow to love it and open the bakery, of course.” If there was something that unsettled Agnes, Jess had yet to see it. She certainly wasn’t fazed by grumpy vineyard managers. “Wouldn’t it be lovely to have your niece or nephew close by? You could really help Jessica out with babysitting and running errands.”

  “Maybe this isn’t such a good idea.” Jessica came around the front of the truck in time to see Duffy’s lips compress, his arms cross.

  Icicles gave off more warmth than Duffy did. “Don’t let me stop you.” But he looked at Goldie, not at Jess. He scowled at the well-behaved, sweet-tempered dog in need of a home. It didn’t matter that Goldie wouldn’t be much trouble. Duffy didn’t want any ties. H
e would have seen a caged bird in the same light.

  It hit Jess then. The reality. In Duffy’s eyes, she was like a cat. Independent, but still in need of care and feeding. If she stayed in town she’d be a burden to him. Not financially. She thought they were past that. But he’d feel a need to check up on her, just as he did Rutgar. He’d see her as part of the excess baggage he had to carry.

  The icicle that was Duffy prickled Jessica’s skin. It made her feel ornery and ready for a fight. Since she’d come to Harmony Valley, she’d tried to respect Duffy’s wishes, but that was useless. He wouldn’t feel better if she moved to Siberia. She couldn’t live her life trying to please him. Why not take a look around town?

  “Okay. I’ll go,” Jess said.

  That drew Duffy’s full attention, like a cold wind from the top of Parish Hill.

  “You’re afraid.” She poked him in the chest. “And what you’re afraid of is that you can’t stop us, any of us, from needing something from you. I might need babysitting. Eunice might need help starting her car. And Flynn? He might need help bringing people to town. He might need you to smile at a stranger and say hello.” She poked him in the chest again. “They call old men like you curmudgeons.” Jess marched to Agnes’s car.

  “What do they call young men like me?” he asked.

  “Sticks-in-the-mud,” Eunice hollered at him.

  “Did someone paint a target on my back?” Duffy feigned trying to look over his shoulder.

  “You did.” As Jess was getting in, she looked over at Eunice. “Aren’t you coming?”

  Eunice brightened like a purple glow worm. “I’d love to.” She hustled across the lawn.

  The sun came out. Car doors slammed. Goldie hesitated on the lawn between the Buick and Duffy.

  “Come on, Dog,” Duffy said in a gruff voice. “You should know when you’re not wanted.”

  Jess rolled down the window as fast as she could turn the crank. “Goldie is wanted.” Jess spoke to Eunice as Agnes pulled away from the curb. “You’d take her, wouldn’t you?”

  “I’m not an animal person,” Eunice hedged.