by Robin Janney
“Do you really understand what you did to us?” he questioned, calmer than before. At least on the outside.
“Not as much as you’d like,” the older woman admitted. “But your brother reamed me up one side and down the other, so I think I might have some idea. I can show you the letter if you’d like to read it.”
Did he really want to? While it would be nice to know the truth of what she was saying about Tim had confronted her, Craig wasn’t sure he could handle his brother’s brokenness. He was having difficulty dealing with the resurfacing of his own. After the night Tim had caught him in the bathroom throwing up, he and his brother hadn’t discussed what had happened ever again.
“No,” Craig said at last. “I’ll take your word for it.”
Meaning he would ask Tim about it later.
Veronica nodded. “Do you think you can forgive me?”
He drew in a deep breath, trying to buy time to find the right words. “I don’t know. The best I can say is: I’ll try.”
“That’s more than I had hoped for,” she said, her relief evident.
“Did you apologize to Tim?”
“I wrote him a letter, since he’d written me. I didn’t think visiting him would be wise, not after some of his words to me.”
Tim hadn’t mentioned that either.
It looked like his stepmother was telling him the truth, her expression matched her body language. She sounded remorseful. So why didn’t he believe her?
“Did he reply?” asked Craig.
“Not as kindly as you have.” Veronica gave him a sad smile. “Do you think there’s any chance you’d be able to call me Mom again?”
Craig grimaced. That was asking too much. “No. I can’t call you that.”
She nodded in understanding, pain marring her grieved expression. “I am sorry, Craig.”
“I know,” he acknowledged. Her grief was written all over her face. Would he ever be brave enough to ask her why?
A tall nurse in a light blue scrub outfit approached them. She wore a cap made of the same material. “Moore family?” she asked.
“Yes,” answered Veronica.
“If you’ll come with me, Dr. Rashid will see you now.”
“Oh, thank you.” His stepmother stood gracefully to her feet.
As Craig followed her, his iPhone chimed. He checked it and hurriedly sent a reply telling his wife he’d get back to her shortly. Obeying the sign on the wall requesting all cellphones be turned off, he tucked it back into his pocket.
The small room they were led to was quite a bit smaller than the waiting area, and much more private. As he sat next to his stepmother once again, Craig’s heart suddenly picked up tempo, and he wiped his hands on his denim covered legs nervously. No, things were not okay.
“I don’t know why they have to make these things such an ordeal,” she complained, apparently oblivious to his discomfort. “Just tell us what we need to know.”
Craig didn’t comment. He didn’t know what to say to ease her worries without betraying his own. His father had always been a strong vital man, and this was shaking that image. He wanted comforting as much as his stepmother did, and he’d left the one person in the world who could do so at home.
Silence dominated as they waited for the doctor. Craig pulled his iPhone out of his pocket and turned it in his hands nervously. He wished he hadn’t turned it off. Surely it would have been good enough to silence it. He was still playing phone tag with Kevin, but his friend wouldn’t be calling this early in the day. He wanted to talk with his friend even more after the events of this morning.
For the first time since his marriage, Craig regretted ending the unofficial counseling sessions he’d had with Kevin. He had thought he was beyond this and had been more concerned with his wife’s recovery from her abduction rather than his own.
Perhaps Veronica was more aware of his discomfort than he had thought because she suddenly said, “I suppose you’re wondering why.”
It took Craig a moment for him to understand what she was talking about. “Yes. I’ve wondered that more than once.”
She bobbed her head in a quick nod, her fingers once again plucking at her clothes. “I don’t want to share everything, Craig. You don’t need my trauma to add to your own. I was twelve when my grandfather did to me what I did to you. However, something happened the summer you were fifteen. I’d rather not share what, but I needed to be in charge. I had to have power. And you were the weakest man in my life.”
Shocked beyond words, he waited to see if she had more to say.
“I’m not saying I didn’t know it was wrong,” Veronica continued, her voice soft with shame. “But my need outweighed right and wrong. Honestly, I can never apologize enough to you and Tim.”
Craig wondered what had happened that summer, but decided he was best off not knowing. “Thanks for sharing what you could,” he said. “Dad?”
“Your father has been far more kind and understanding than I expected or deserved. He was ready to show me the door, but I promised him I would get help if he would just give me another chance. I begged him really. I’m not saying it’s been easy, but it wasn’t as bad as I thought.” Veronica shot him a wobbly smile. “Sometimes he comes to my sessions with me. Not quite marriage counseling, but it helps us heal.”
Craig stamped down the rage her comment sparked. It would do no good to express it. Thankfully at that moment, his father’s doctor entered the room and both his attention and Veronica’s turned to the tall doctor.
C an’t talk now, going back to see Dad’s doctor…will get back to you when I turn the phone back on ♥
Angela sighed at the reply text from her husband. She looked at Princess who sat on the floor beside her side of the bed. “It could be a long morning,” she told the dog, patting her head and ruffling sand-colored fur. Throwing her legs over the side of the bed, she made her way downstairs to let Princess out for her morning run.
But at the door, Princess hesitated. Looking up at her mistress with sad puppy dog eyes, she let out a soft woof.
“Oh, get going!” said Angela impatiently. “Go do your business and I’ll let you in after I’ve showered.”
The dog trotted out obediently but didn’t bounce out like she normally did.
“What is wrong with everyone?” Angela wondered aloud. Shutting the door behind her, she returned upstairs. She’d slept later than usual, thanks to the sleeping pill she’d taken, but was still up early. She hated Craig being gone. The bed always felt so empty.
Once done with her morning routine, she found her brother Jared sitting at the kitchen table. She managed a smile. “Morning,” she said lightly.
Jared nodded around his coffee.
She found Princess waiting by the door and let her in. The dog paced the kitchen before settling on the floor near the door. Her floppy ear twitched nervously as though she were listening for something. Angela shook her head at the dog’s strange behavior as she gave the dog her morning dish of food and then began to fix herself breakfast. She was keeping it light today, English Muffins and blueberry jam. Mixed berry tea this morning. Maybe coffee if she was still feeling sluggish afterwards.
“You look tired,” commented Jared as he shoveled scrambled eggs into his mouth.
Angela wondered who had made Jared’s breakfast. Everything had already been cleaned up and taken care of, which was Nan’s trademark, but the housekeeper was nowhere to be seen. Not that she doubted her brother’s culinary abilities, but it did seem strange to her.
“I am,” she said honestly in answer to his question. Bringing her breakfast with her, she sat at the table next to him. The table in the kitchen was a smaller version of their dining room table. “I don’t sleep well when Craig’s away.”
“When will you know more about his dad?”
“I hope soon,” she replied, sipping the milky sweetness of her tea. “Craig’s at the hospital now and has his cellphone turned off.”
Jared took a slow swal
low of coffee; it was as pale as what Angela fixed for herself on the rare occasions she drank it. “It’s going to be a long morning then. Are you going to be alright on your own?”
“Of course,” said Angela, hoping she had her irritation masked. She managed to smile at her brother. “Don’t let me stop you from getting started with Rick. What does he have planned for you today?”
“He’s taking me out and showing me the ‘lay of the land’.” Jared shrugged. “I guess I get paid for it too. Is Craig always so generous?”
“Usually,” she answered. “It’s standard pay for new hires. It’ll go up once Rick decides you’re trained. The store has pretty good pay too.”
She paused at that.
“Angie?” her brother asked. “What’s wrong.”
“I’m…not sure. I…” The memory overpowered her:
Angela was sitting at the kitchen table in her old apartment. Grandma Pearl had taken one of her library books into the living room, but everything else on her table was precisely where it was supposed to be. The salt and pepper shaker sat in the middle, the salt on the right. Her books were stacked according to size, all the spines facing out. Her teacup sat on top of a pink saucer, and the tea bag sat on the saucer, the string circled around it.
For the moment, she could pretend she was alone in her apartment. Her checkbook sat in front of her, as well as the paper she’d been doing math on before talking to the bank. Hanging up from the bank teller, she was now calling Craig immediately afterwards. Had he really paid her while she was in the hospital? He couldn’t do that!
The phone had rung only once before he’d answered.
“Hi honey, what’s up?”
“I…you have caller ID?” she asked. Any other time she’d called, he never seemed to know it was her.
“I do. I don’t always check it before I answer, but I have company and needed to know whether to answer or not.” Craig sounded glad to hear her voice.
“Oh.” She didn’t know what to say to that. Her boyfriend had company and had called her ‘honey’ in front of whoever it was. He’d never done anything like that before, but they hadn’t really been a couple for very long, had they? She should say something and let him go tend to his company. “Am I interrupting? I can call back.”
“No,” he replied. “It’s fine. My friend Kevin and his wife Sherry showed up today. They’ll enjoy listening in on us.”
He’d mentioned Kevin before. Wasn’t that who he said he’d been talking to, getting help from? What if he was the one she remembered from the accident? She had to play it cool. “Hmm, I’m sure. Just don’t put me on speaker, please. Michelle does that to me all the time. Anyway, the reason I’m calling is because I’ve checked my bank account. Are you still paying me?”
“I am.” There had been no hesitation to his answer.
“Craig! You can’t do that!” She knew she sounded angry, but it was fear she was feeling. “I mean, I appreciate it, but you can’t treat me any differently from your other employees. I know you own the store, so don’t even try that line again. Just because it worked once, doesn’t mean it’s going to work again!”
He had waited a moment. “Done?”
“Yes.” Her heart was pounding.
“Angela, you should have read some of the fine print in the paperwork you signed your first day. There is a clause stating I have the right to pay my employees for missed work if the managers and I feel there was a good reason for the absence.”
What? Who did that? “Bullshit. I want to see it.”
“I will bring you a copy when I come up later. You can also ask anyone else. They’ll tell you I’ve done it for all of them at least once. For that matter, you can go through the store’s books if you want.” He sounded…amused, to the point, arrogant, pleased with himself. All at once, how did he do that?
“So, you’re not giving me special treatment?” She had to know.
“No. I’ll admit, I didn’t talk to Dave or Miranda before making my decision, but that’s the only step I skipped. Still want me to bring your paperwork up?”
“No,” she sighed in relief. “But I might ask Becky about it. Or Larry. He missed a few days after that hard tackle back in November.”
“He did, and he’ll tell you he was paid for it.”
“No wonder you don’t have a high turnover…”
“Angela!” Jared’s fingers snapped in front of her face and she jumped back.
“What?” she asked, grabbing her mug of tea to have something to hold. She didn’t understand the anxiety she was feeling at the interruption. “What happened?”
“You tell me!” Her brother didn’t move from where he was standing beside her. “We were talking about Craig’s generosity, and the next thing I know you’re staring blankly! You weren’t even blinking. I’ve seen your panic attacks before and this wasn’t one of them.”
“I…think it was a flashback.” Her heart hadn’t stopped pounding yet, pounding like it had in the memory. “I was remembering a phone conversation I had with Craig after I got out of the hospital with pneumonia. He claimed the store had a clause stating he could pay me while I was out sick.”
“Damn. Does it?” Jared asked, remaining at her side.
“I don’t know. I don’t remember if I checked with Larry or Becky about it.” Drinking from her tea, Angela wished her brother would sit down.
“Is it one of your missing memories?” he asked. “Is that why you acted like that?”
“I think so.”
Taking a deep breath, Jared returned to his seat. When he looked at her, his brown eyes pierced her. “That was a few weeks before you were abducted, Angie. How much are you missing?”
“It’s spotty, Jared.” Her breathing was beginning to hitch in panic at his line of questioning. She hadn’t wanted anyone to know.
“How spotty? And does Craig know?” He slapped the table, startling her. “Dammit, talk to me, Angela! We used to be friends!”
She cursed the tears beginning to slide down her cheeks. “Then why didn’t you ever come see me when I was in the hospital? Mom and Dad said you refused to visit, even after I woke up. And then when I came to the farmhouse, you yelled at me! I wasn’t – You look so much like Randy, I wasn’t sure who you were!”
Shame colored her brother’s face. “I was angry, and I was scared. I didn’t want to see you that way, Angie. Are you saying you don’t remember us being friends?”
Wiping her cheeks, Angela struggled to answer. Memories flittered in her mind like a skittish colt. “I remember some. You used to like staying with me at my apartment. You teased me about whether Craig had kissed me or not. You…you were angry I went to the movies to see ‘Batman Begins’ without you.”
“I was. But when we went down to Craig’s that first time, and we watched it there it made up for that.”
Again, a memory pushed its way forward in her mind:
Angela was sitting in the movie theater in Sawyersville. It was her first night off from the vet clinic in a few weeks and Doc Maynard had given her a movie pass and enough money for popcorn and soda. He was like a kind grandfather to her. The movie previews had just begun when a latecomer walked by and crossed between her and the screen as he took a seat two rows ahead of her. He sat far enough off center from her that she could see who it was.
And her heart began to beat a little faster. She hadn’t seen Craig Moore in a couple years, despite living in the same town. Not since…Even here, in this memory there was a blank spot, something she couldn’t remember. She shifted uncomfortably in her seat, not understanding why.
Oh my God…what if he sees me? What if he recognizes me?
Slouching down in her seat, she wondered whether she should just leave. But she hardly ever went to the movies alone, and she really wanted to see ‘Batman Begins’. Christian Bale was one of her favorites, so was Batman. And this was a free movie, a gift from Doc Maynard.
Besides, the store owner hadn’t said to stay away fro
m him, just stay away from the store. The fight with Stinky had been so long ago. He probably wouldn’t even recognize her anyway, even though they’d run into each other a few times at the County Fair. He’d been nice when he’d talked to her then. After all, she was a woman now.
Mischief welled up in her, and she tossed a kernel of popcorn at him. She overshot him, but it had been close enough for him to look around. She decided to try again. This time it bounced off the back of his head. His hand came up, brushing at the spot. He looked around in the dim light of the theater as the previews finished playing.
Why does he have to be so scary? she wondered as his eyes passed right over her and glared at the laughing teens behind her. Had he even seen her?
He’s so cute, and nice from what she remembered. She thought about tossing another piece of popcorn but decided not to. He might move if she was too annoying, and he was so nice to look at. She was older now, but what if he still thought of her as a kid? He had always called her kid when he…
Jared’s fingers were snapping in front of her face again. She swatted his hand away.
“Stop it, just stop!” She stood, picking her breakfast plate and tea mug up. Why did her heart hurt at this memory? “They’re not even the memories I want, Jared. So what if I remember being in the theater at the same time as Craig when we saw ‘Batman Begins’? I still don’t remember my first wedding.”
Angela decided to do what she did best. She took off upstairs to hide.
17
“W hat the…” Jared watched his sister flee his presence, Princess on her heels, and listened to her rapid footsteps up the stairs. Had his sister’s missing memories begun to resurface? It sounded it. But why was it scaring her?
He’d bet not only did Craig not know how much was missing, but Jared found it hard to believe his brother-in-law would have taken off without his wife if he’d known her memories were returning.
Finishing his breakfast, Jared placed his dirty dishes in the kitchen sink. He pulled his new iPhone out of his back pocket to send his brother-in-law a message.
No.