“Dammit, Hailey, I want you.” The words were raw and vital and exactly what she wanted to hear.
“Me, too.”
He pulled her close and kissed her again, a fast, hot, frenzied kiss. “If we were anywhere but here…”
But they weren’t. What if one of the kids on the ward walked in? And since when did she want to tear off her clothes and jump on a guy just because he’d kissed her?
This was what sexual abstinence did to a person. It turned a perfectly functioning brain to cotton fluff. But gosh, he could kiss like nobody’s business. And she wanted to throw herself on the narrow bed and drag him down with her, not bothering to take their clothes off. She wanted him to…
She struggled to her feet and straightened her dress.
He got up, as well, and clasped her by the shoulders, looking deep into her eyes. His were filled with tenderness and amusement and ferocious heat.
“I hope you don’t start thinking I took advantage of you when you were down.”
If only.
She managed a facsimile of a grin. “You weren’t the one sitting on my knee.”
His grin was lopsided. “I should be so lucky.”
“I should go.”
He glanced at his watch and shook his head. “Me, too. I’m later than usual. But first, I do have some good news for you. For some reason I almost forgot what I wanted to tell you. I got a call this morning saying you’ve been approved as a foster parent—in order to expedite, they agreed to use the home study done for your adoption application. It’s my call now about where David goes, so of course you can take him home. Dr. Larue is going to check him over and release him tomorrow morning. I’ll leave the proper forms at the desk.”
“Omigod.” Hailey brought her hands to her face and then lost control entirely and threw her arms around him in a ferocious hug, squealing, “Oh, that’s wonderful. Thank you, Roy.”
But then she thought of Shannon, and the way David had sobbed and struggled to follow her. Abruptly she let go of Roy. “But she’ll be able to visit him? His…” It was hard for her even to say the word… “His…mother. Shannon Riggs will be able to see him?”
He nodded. “Yeah, she will—after she sees a judge. My guess is she’ll be allowed supervised visits.”
Outrage and resentment rose again like steam. “Supervised by whom?”
“By a child-care worker.”
“At my house?” The thought of Shannon coming to her house made her want to vomit.
“No. It’ll be at one of the group centers or the office. The ministry believes that in most cases it’s best not to have the foster parent involved.”
The ministry was right. It could lead to murder. “And this worker will take him there?”
“Yes. She’ll pick him up from your house and return him when the visit’s over.” He was studying her closely. “Do you have a problem with that?”
“No.” Of course she did, but she didn’t want to rock the boat here. She detested the thought of a stranger taking David anywhere, much less to see the woman who, in her estimation, had no right to call herself a mother.
But he was going home with her, and for right now, that was enough. There were a million things she needed to do, like notify the nursery downstairs that David would be attending, give them a list of her shifts, pick up diapers and extra milk and fresh vegetables, make some soup and finish fixing his room, and—
“Hailey?” Roy was smiling at her.
She looked at him, and something deep inside of her slipped sideways, caught and held in a place she didn’t want to go.
She didn’t want to feel this way about him. Damn and blast and murder. She didn’t want to look at him and start having fantasies about happy-ever-after. She wouldn’t—she just wouldn’t. But wishing and the force of will couldn’t make it go away.
“Hailey? Why are you looking at me like that?” He raised a quizzical eyebrow.
It was all she could do to speak. “Like…how?”
He shrugged and frowned. “Scowling. Almost like you’re fuming mad again. I’m sorry about the visitation thing. There’s absolutely nothing I can do about it. It’s policy.”
“I know that.” But she was furious with him. She wanted to smack him one, hard, just as she’d wanted to before. Why had he done this—come into her life and made her start hoping that there could be the kind of romance she’d long ago given up on?
At least he didn’t suspect why she was mad. That was some comfort.
“I’m not angry at all,” she lied. “I’m just overwhelmed. Too much has been happening. I’m thrilled about taking David home, but I didn’t eat this morning. I guess I need to have some lunch or something.”
Hunger he understood. “C’mon, I’ll walk you down to the cafeteria and buy you a sandwich. I wish I had time to take you somewhere special to celebrate, but we’ll go out another time.”
When they passed the nursing desk, Karen came rushing over.
“There you are. I’m so glad you’re still around. Hailey, we’re having a problem with David.”
Hailey stiffened. “What’s wrong?”
“He woke up a few minutes ago, got out of his crib and went over right by the door and sat down on the floor.” She motioned with her chin. An aide was sitting on a chair by the door with David on her lap.
“He insists on being there. He won’t budge even a foot from it, and every time someone comes in, he thinks it’s his mother. He has a tantrum if we try to move him.” Karen rolled her eyes. “Margaret says he’s to be put back in his crib and a cover will be put on it if he tries to get out again. Can you believe that? She’s down in the drug dispensary at the moment, but she’ll be back soon.” She shot Hailey a helpless look. “Poor little fellow.”
Hailey’s eyes were on David and the woman holding him. The aide had dragged the chair right up to the door and was sitting there with David on her lap. He was clutching Bonzo and watching the door with an intensity that seared Hailey’s heart.
“I’ll take care of him,” she said fiercely.
She hurried over to David, Roy close behind her. Hailey knelt and stroked David’s flushed cheek, keeping her voice light and playful.
“Hey, little guy, want to come with Hailey to the playroom?”
He glanced at her and shook his head. His eyes went back to the door.
“I’ll take him.” Hailey lifted him in her arms, feeling the tension in his body. He stiffened and pointed wordlessly at the door.
“Yeah, sport, I know. You want to stay here so you can watch for her.”
“Mama.” His face puckered and the word came out on a choked sob.
Hailey had to struggle to keep her own tears back.
She sank into the chair with David on her knee. Roy stood beside her for a moment, then leaned over and pressed a kiss to David’s head.
“Hang in there, sport. Hailey, I’m going to get you a sandwich. I’ll send someone up with it. And I’ll call you a little later and see how this turns out.”
He left, and shortly afterward a woman from the kitchen arrived with two tuna sandwiches, a box of chocolate cookies and a carton of milk. Hailey nibbled at the food as she talked to David, trying to distract him, trying to get him to agree to move further than three feet from the door.
But each time she tried, he stiffened and struggled to escape from her arms.
Margaret came marching down the ward and stopped beside them, her hands on her hips. “And just what is going on here, may I ask?”
Her voice was icy cold, and the look she gave Hailey was overflowing with venom.
Hailey kept her voice low. “He’s upset and I’m trying to soothe him.”
The older nurse harrumphed. “That child belongs in his crib. Anyone can see that he’s overwrought and needs a nap. I’ve already instructed housekeeping to send up a cover to contain him.”
The very idea of trapping a child in a crib was monstrous. The urge to lash out at Margaret was overwhelming, but Hail
ey struggled for control. David didn’t need adults hollering all around him. Margaret didn’t need to be hollered at, either—she just needed to do something besides nursing.
“A cover won’t be necessary, honest. I’ll stay with him until he goes to sleep.”
“And I suppose you’ll also make sure he doesn’t climb out during the night and disrupt the entire ward? Do you plan to spend twenty-four hours a day here, Hailey? Because if that’s your plan, then obviously there’s no need for the rest of the nursing team. We all know you could run this ward single-handed, don’t we? The rest of us might just as well go home.”
CHAPTER THIRTEEN
HAILEY HELD ON to her temper. Barely.
“David is my responsibility, Margaret. I’ve been approved as his foster mother, and I’m taking him home with me tomorrow morning.” Her voice was shaking, her efforts at control no longer possible. “And if I hear that you’ve put any sort of cover on his crib or upset him in any way, I promise you, you’ll answer not only to me, but to the association and the ministry and…and the newspapers and anyone else I can think of who would sympathize with a helpless child. Is that clear?”
Margaret’s face turned from scarlet to magenta, and for an instant Hailey wondered if she might be about to have a coronary. But she turned without another word and marched to the nurses’ station.
David had started to wail again during the confrontation, and Hailey got up and tried to walk with him, needing to release her own welter of emotions before they blew a hole in the top of her head. Why did Margaret have to push her so hard? She’d tried to stay reasonable, she really had.
David became hysterical if they moved more than a few feet from the door, so at last Hailey gave up and simply sat down again with him cradled on her lap. She spent the time singing and telling him stories, talking to the other kids that came by, feeding him when the aide brought his tray, changing his diaper when it needed changing. She’d have to just outwait him, she decided. Sooner or later he’d give up his vigil or fall asleep.
But hours passed, and bedtime came and still he fought sleep. Every so often, he pointed at the door and said in a soft, plaintive voice, “Mama?”
Hailey thought her heart would break each time he did it.
Finally, finally his head nodded, and then he gave in, his body going limp and his breathing becoming steady. She held her breath as she carried him to his crib and gently put him down.
Weary to the bone, she still had to stop at the desk and talk with the other nurses. She wasn’t sure if Margaret had left orders to cover the crib or not.
It turned out she hadn’t. The grapevine had been thorough, and the other nurses all knew Hailey was taking David home with her in the morning. They congratulated her and agreed that it was the best thing for David. And they all said they were happy for Hailey, because they knew how long she’d waited for a baby.
But there was also concern about Shannon.
“Too bad she ever showed up,” Karen said. “He’s been doing so well.”
Hailey was too angry with Shannon Riggs even to speak about her.
“I hope he stays asleep, and probably by morning he’ll have forgotten her,” Karen suggested.
Hailey wasn’t so certain. She had a bad feeling about the situation. She considered staying, bedding down in the room beside him, but she had so much to do at home.
“Don’t worry, we’ll keep a close eye on him tonight,” Karen promised.
“Be sure to call me if there’s any problem,” Hailey said.
SHE HAD TONS of shopping to do, and she hated shopping.
It was after nine by the time she stopped in front of her house. At first she didn’t recognize Laura’s red van parked across the street.
But she heard the voices from the backyard as soon as she got out of the car—her sister’s cautioning tone and then Christopher, her nephew, laughing.
Mystified, she walked around the house.
Laura was sitting on the back steps, one arm around Samantha. Christopher was in the rabbit pen, playing with Skippy. What on earth were her sister and the kids doing at her house at this hour? And why in heck had Laura chosen one of the worst possible times to pay her a visit?
“Hey, you guys.” Hailey braced herself as Sam jumped off the step and threw herself into her arms.
“Auntie, where were you? We’ve been waiting forever for you to get home. We went for a burger and came back and you still weren’t here.”
“Sorry, dumpling, I didn’t know you were coming.” Hailey kissed the little girl and then went over to Laura.
“So, just when you decide to come visit, I’m out shopping,” she said in a light tone, but alarm bells were going off in her head. Something was up. Laura’s eye makeup was smeared, and her eyes were bloodshot, and it looked as if she wasn’t wearing any lipstick. Hailey hadn’t seen Laura without lipstick since the day her sister turned thirteen and was finally allowed to wear it.
Sudden fear sent Hailey’s pulse rocketing. “Is Mom okay?”
“Mom?” Laura sounded distracted. “I guess so. I dunno. Why are you worried about Mom?”
Hailey didn’t answer. Well, at least that wasn’t it, she thought as relief spilled through her. But there was still something fishy here. “Come on inside, all of you,” she suggested, unlocking her back door and leading the way in, switching on lights. “It’s getting too dark to sit outside. We can have herbal tea. Maybe the kids would like grape juice?”
“Should we bring our stuff in from the van, Mommy?” Samantha asked.
Stuff? What stuff? Hailey was more confused than ever.
“Leave it where it is for now.”
“Maybe you guys could go out and bring in all the groceries from my car,” Hailey said. She handed them the keys and they raced out.
Laura sank into a chair.
“My head is splitting.” She sighed. “I’ve had the most horrendous day.”
Hailey hadn’t exactly had a terrific day herself, but she decided not to mention it. She put the kettle on and waited, but her sister didn’t say any more.
“What’s going on, Laura?”
“I’ve left Frank.”
Hailey was stunned. She stared at her sister and then pulled a chair close to her and took her hand.
“God, I’m so sorry. I had no idea. How come?”
“Because he’s having another affair.” Laura’s voice was resigned.
Shock waves rippled through Hailey. “Another affair?”
Her sister gave a weary shrug. “Oh, it’s a long story. He started right after we were married. There’s probably more women than I know about, or care to know about. But this time he brought her to the house. The kids were at soccer practice and I guess he thought I was at the gym.” Raw pain made Laura’s voice tremble. “They were in the bedroom—in our bed, on my Porthault sheets. I walked in on them. Seeing him there with her…well, before I could ignore it, but this time I just couldn’t.”
Needing to hide her shock and revulsion, Hailey got up and made the tea.
“I just blew, Hailey. I walked out. I can’t stand it anymore.”
Hailey couldn’t understand how her sister had stood it as long as she had.
The kids came in laden with bags, and Hailey took a packet of peanut-butter cookies and two glasses of milk into the tiny parlor where she kept her television.
“You guys can watch anything you like.”
“We want your video about that lady who lived at Tara.”
The original Gone With The Wind was the only video she owned. It probably wasn’t the best choice for seven-and nine-year-olds, but it was long and it would keep them occupied. Hailey plugged it in.
Back in the kitchen, she asked the question that was bothering her.
“How come you didn’t leave before?”
“I threatened a couple of times. He’s a lawyer. He told me I’d lose everything—the house, my car, even the kids. He’s smart—he could probably do it.” She gave Hai
ley a look, and for the first time her voice was angry. “And if I left him, where would I go? What would I do? It’s not as if I have a career to fall back on like you.”
There was resentment in Laura’s voice, which surprised Hailey. She’d never thought her sister wanted anything to do with a career.
Laura patted her hair. “And I’m used to living a certain way. It’s horrible to think of…of having to count every penny and worry about bills and all that stuff.”
Hailey nodded, but she thought how much she would prefer counting pennies and worrying about bills to living with a philandering, arrogant bully.
Laura’s anger suddenly gave way to more tears, and they rolled freely down her cheeks. “I know I sound awful, thinking only about money, and I know the law would make him support the kids,” she sobbed. “But I’ve seen what happens to some women when he defends their husbands in a divorce proceeding. One of the partners divorced his wife last year. Frank handled the case for him, and the poor woman’s working in a supermarket now. I saw her last week. She said her legal bills ate up most of the settlement she finally got, because her ex took her to court over and over. And Frank told me she got off easy compared with what would happen to me.”
Rage, hot and wild and sudden, burned its way through Hailey’s veins. It was small consolation to learn that Frank was the creep she’d always suspected him of being.
“We’ll just murder him and bury him in the backyard and avoid the whole court thing.” She said it to lighten the atmosphere, but she actually felt like doing it. How dare that…that puffed-up waste of human skin treat her sister this way?
“I’ve thought about it.” Laura sniffled, and Hailey found tissues and handed them to her. “Mom doesn’t know, so please don’t say anything to her, okay, Hailey?” Laura’s voice was imploring. “She’ll just figure it’s my fault.”
“Your fault?” Hailey was astounded. “How the heck could she ever think this was your fault?”
“She will. You know how much she likes Frank. I’ve tried sometimes to talk to her, but she doesn’t want to know anything bad about him. She brags about him to the people she works with, how much money he makes, what a nice house we have, the fancy stores where she and I go shopping.”
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