Mail Order Anna (Brides 0f Sweet Creek Book 1)

by Sarah Banks

“I would like a baby brother,” Harry specified. “But maybe a sister would be okay too.”

  “Harry hush,” Jack said. “And sit down so you don’t tumble out of the wagon.”

  Harry scowled. She crossed her arms and sat down with a huff.

  Harry looked remarkably like Jack when she scowled. It almost made Anna laugh out loud. Anna turned and faced forward, avoiding Jack’s eyes.

  It was a quiet trip out of town. Harry was pouting in the wagon bed and Jack stared stonily forward as Anna studied the scenery on her side of the road.

  Halfway home, Jack brought the wagon to a halt and looked at her. “Ready for your driving lesson?”

  Anna looked at him in surprise. She had forgotten all about it.

  “I don’t know,” she said hesitantly.

  “I am!” Harry said, bouncing up from the rear.

  “Harry!” Jack tossed over his shoulder in exasperation.

  Harry made another sound of displeasure. She crossed her arms and mumbled, “You never let me do anything. I can’t hold a baby. I can’t drive a wagon.”

  Jack held the reins in one hand and extended his other hand toward Anna. “Here, stand up.”

  Anna stood and he grasped her around the waist with one arm, holding her gently as she stepped past him and they switched seats. He handed her the reins. The warm, worn leather felt foreign in her hands. She looked at the powerful creatures standing restlessly before her. The gray speckled horse on the right tossed his head and nickered. The other horse responded and took a step forward. The wagon shifted. Anna gripped the reins tightly.

  “Jack, I don’t think I want to do this.”

  “You’ll be fine,” he insisted. “They’re the gentlest horses in Sweet Creek.”

  She glanced at the powerful, impatient creatures again. She doubted that.

  “Please Jack. I’ll learn, just not today, okay?” Anna knew her tone was odd, her voice thin. She bit her lip and looked down, avoiding Jack’s eyes. Her emotions were running high after seeing Laura’s baby. Anna felt like crying and more than anything she didn’t want to cry in front of Jack.

  He studied her for a moment before nodding and they switched seats again and he quietly drove the remainder of the way home.

  Unloading their few purchases only took a few short minutes. Anna offered to make him lunch but he declined and took the wagon onto the barn. She sighed.

  “I’m hungry,” Harry piped up from beside her on the porch as Anna watched Jack drive away.

  “Why doesn’t that surprise me?” Anna teased with a small smile.

  Anna made another simple lunch of sandwiches and lemonade. After eating with Harry, she sent Harry with a stack of sandwiches and a canteen of lemonade for her father. While Harry was gone she started supper and then began to work on Harry’s nightgown.

  She was glad to have the house to herself for a couple of hours while she wrangled her high emotions. Sewing usually helped her sort out her thoughts.

  Harry returned to the house a few hours later, close to when supper would be ready. Anna had already cut and pinned the fabric and was well into sewing the simple flannel gown. She was happy to see Harry but still felt a little high-strung. She probably just needed a good night’s sleep. She tried not to think about Jack and their relationship or lack thereof, and instead focus on the simple task of sewing that she enjoyed so much.

  “What are you making?” Harry asked, watching Anna over her shoulder.

  “A nightgown for you,” she said. “If you like the style, I’ll make a second one for you before winter.”

  Harry was silent for a moment. “But I wear Papa’s shirt to bed.”

  “Yes but this nightshirt is tailored just for you. So you won’t trip on it and land face first in the privy,” Anna teased.

  Harry giggled. She leaned against Anna and hugged her around her neck. Anna felt tears prick her eyes. She hugged Harry tight.

  Anna might never have any children of her own, but at least she had Harry.

  Chapter Fourteen

  When Jack entered the house that evening Harry and Anna were hugging and laughing. When Anna noticed him by the door, her smile disappeared and she slowly pulled away from Harry after smoothing her hair affectionately. She gathered up her sewing.

  “I’ll have supper on the table in just a few minutes,” she said softly, avoiding his eyes.

  Jack nodded. He looked away and started to take off his jacket. He was grateful he was facing the wall so that no one noticed him wince as he removed his jacket. He suppressed a groan.

  It had been a careless mistake. Instead of thinking about the task at hand, he had been thinking about Anna again. He had seen the yearning in her eyes as she held Adam and Laura’s newborn baby. She had tried to shutter the emotion but he had still seen it. So lost in his thoughts of Anna, he hadn’t been paying close enough attention when plowing the final field and he had wrenched his shoulder. His shoulder throbbed like the devil but he was relieved his carelessness hadn’t harmed his animals.

  After bringing the horses back to the barn, he slowly groomed and fed them with his uninjured arm and returned to the house just in time for supper. He heard Anna and Harry laughing from outside as he washed up.

  Anna was a good mother to Harry. She was all Harry talked about when they were out in the fields together and she was spending more and more time with Anna during the day. He knew his daughter already loved her and he was starting to feel something too and darn it, he didn’t want to. He wanted to keep her at an arm’s length but instead she was invading his thoughts morning, noon and night. And now Anna was starting to withdraw from him and he didn’t blame her.

  After supper, he waited until Anna and Harry had cleared the table and washed the dishes before settling before the fire and Anna began to brush and braid Harry’s hair as she did every night. Jack began to rifle through the kitchen cabinets, finally finding a half-empty bottle of whiskey tucked out of sight on a high shelf. He could feel Anna’s eyes on him as he poured a generous amount into a glass. He turned to watch her as he downed the glass’s amber contents. She looked away.

  Jack grimaced. He wasn’t much of a drinker but he knew the whiskey would help to ease the pain in his shoulder. Hopefully it would be just enough to help him get to sleep and not lay awake thinking about his wife all night. There was another glass’s worth in the bottle. If he couldn’t sleep or the pain in his shoulder didn’t lessen he would finish it off, but for now he pushed the bottle to the back of the counter and hoped his shoulder injury wasn’t serious. He had too much to do to take even a day off for an injury.

  He settled into his chair by the fire. He must have been moving differently or made a noise of some kind because even though Harry hadn’t noticed anything wrong, Anna had.

  “Are you alright?” She asked, her voice soft with concern.

  “Fine,” he replied curtly.

  Anna sighed and gathered her hairbrush and sewing things and stood, excusing herself to bed early.

  “You aren’t going to stay up and listen to Papa read?” Harry asked, disappointment written on her features.

  “Not tonight sweetheart.” She bent down to hug Harry. “Sleep tight,” she said before disappearing into her room.

  Jack read for the usual amount of time. He missed Anna’s company. He wished he hadn’t been so short with her. He found his gaze constantly wandering to her bedroom door. There was no light underneath but he wondered if she was still awake and listening.

  When he finally finished the book, he bookmarked a few pages back, about the time Harry had fallen asleep. He would pick up there tomorrow. He let the dog out and back in a few minutes later and banked the fire before he woke Harry. He couldn’t carry her upstairs tonight. She went upstairs sleepily as he held the lamp and followed.

  He lay in bed, staring at the ceiling for quite some time. Although the drink hadn’t helped him sleep, it had eased the ache in his shoulder.

  He heard Anna’s door open. He liste
ned to her quietly moving around downstairs for a few minutes before she finally went outside.

  Jack waited a few minutes for her to return. He began to grow concerned until he heard the low creak of the porch swing.

  He listened for a few minutes before pulling on his jeans and easing his shirt over his sore shoulder.

  “Papa?” Harry murmured, slightly awakened by the sound of him moving around.

  “Go back to sleep Harry. I’m just going downstairs for a bit,” he explained, leaning over and rubbing her back for a moment.

  Harry sighed, burying her face in her pillow.

  The door to Anna’s room was open. She had left her lamp burning low on her nightstand, the soft light illuminating the main room.

  Jack’s eyes were drawn to the bottle of whiskey on the counter as he descended the stairs. He hadn’t needed the second drink but now the bottle stood empty. He hadn’t pinned his wife as a drinker. Maybe she had poured it down the sink. Now that he could see her doing, he thought with a smile.

  He didn’t bother putting on his boots. He quietly opened the door and went outside barefoot.

  Anna briefly glanced over at him. She sat reclined on the porch swing. She was still fully dressed in the clothes she had worn that day minus her boots. Her skirts were hiked up well past her ankles as she pushed off the porch railing with her stocking feet each time the swing came back forward.

  Jack leaned against the doorjamb and studied her. She glanced at him again. Seeing the direction of his gaze, she pulled her feet down from the railing and belatedly fixed her dress. The swing slowly came to a halt. He slowly walked forward and sat next to her.

  She stiffened but continued to stare silently into the night. He followed her gaze. The moon was nearly full, distant and high in the sky. He could see several hundred feet of his property before it disappeared into darkness. He looked back at Anna. She continued to stare straight ahead.

  He took a deep breath. “Anna, I’m sorry. I tried to warn you,” he said softly. He wanted to touch her arm, hold her, comfort her in some way but he kept his hands at his side.

  She avoided his gaze, crossed her arms protectively and nodded. He saw a tear slip down her cheek.

  He ran a hand through his hair and made a noise of frustration. He didn’t know what to say or what to do. But God, he didn’t want to hurt her. He didn’t want to make her cry.

  Anna jumped up from the swing and tried to quickly walk past him. She stumbled slightly and he caught her arm but he didn’t let go. She was brought up short.

  She turned and looked at him accusingly, her face now streaming with tears. “Let me go!” She demanded.

  He slowly shook his head. He rubbed the pad of his thumb across her wrist but she only cried harder.

  “Let me go Jack!” She said louder as she started to sob. She was no longer trying to pull away. She stood still and defeated before him.

  He felt an ache deep inside him at her pain. She was angry and hurt and he knew it was his fault.

  Jack loosened his grip but he still didn’t let her go. Not from the porch and not from his life. He couldn’t. He needed her.

  She finally gave up and sat back down next to him. He immediately released her wrist. She lightly rubbed her wrist before she buried her face in her hands and began to sob.

  When Jack pulled her into his arms, she didn’t resist. Her hands gripped handfuls of his shirt as she pressed her face against his chest and continued to cry.

  He held her against him, rubbing his hand up and down her back, his lips against her temple. He could smell the slightest hint of spirits on her breath. He continued to hold her until her crying slowed and quieted, tapering off into little sniffs and hiccups, until she was still and silent in his arms.

  He heard her breathing begin to even out, her body going limp as she fell asleep in his embrace. He held her for a few minutes longer, not knowing when he would ever get another chance before he lifted her into his arms. He ignored the pain in his shoulder and carried her inside.

  Jack carefully laid her down on her bed, her head resting gently on the pillow. Dark wet lashes fanned her cheeks. There were circles underneath her eyes and her mouth carried a sad expression, even in her sleep.

  He stood watching her for a few minutes before he finally forced himself away. He turned down the lamp and turned to leave.

  “Jack,” Anna whispered sleepily. “Please don’t go. I don’t want to be alone anymore.”

  He turned. Even in the low light he could see tears leaking from her eyes. He nodded.

  Jack sank onto the bed next to her. She rolled to face the wall and he lay down behind her, pressing against her back. They shared her pillow. He reached up and unpinned her hair, letting it pool against the pillow like liquid silk. He wrapped his arm around her and pulled her back against him and buried his nose in her hair, holding her as she slept.

  He was falling in love with her and it terrified him.

  He hadn’t intended to fall asleep but awoke a few hours later, just as the sun peeked over the distant peaks, lightening the sky. He untangled himself from her, careful not to wake her and quietly left the room.

  Chapter Fifteen

  Anna woke mid-morning and lay in bed for a few minutes while she tried to figure out why she had been sleeping in her new, now hopelessly wrinkled dress and why her head ached so. Then she remembered and the previous night’s events started to flood back to her.

  Her emotions had been running high yesterday after seeing Adam and Laura, happily married with a new baby. It was exactly what she had wanted for herself. To have a husband look at her with the same love and affection that Adam had looked at Laura with. Anna had felt envious and not at all like herself.

  Jack had been acting peculiar as well and after he was short with her Anna decided to go to bed early. Perhaps a good night’s rest would help her feel better. Instead she couldn’t sleep and lay in bed for quite some time listening to Jack read aloud to Harry before they went upstairs. Anna continued to lie in bed and stare at the dark ceiling.

  Anna had finally given up on sleep, got dressed and went out into the main room. She needed to use the privy and planned to sit on the porch swing for a while when she noticed the bottle of whiskey on the counter. That was when she had had her first, and her last drink of spirits. It burned her throat, stealing her breath. It tasted like the worst medicine she had ever tasted. Why anyone would voluntarily drink that was beyond her.

  She did notice after a while that the whiskey had taken the edge off of her high emotions and warmed her body but she ended up feeling even more melancholy than before as she swung on the porch swing staring into the night.

  When Jack found her on the porch Anna only wanted to be alone with her thoughts. He had apologized and she knew then that he would never love her. It had been too much to bear. She tried to leave but he wouldn’t let her and she couldn’t hold back her tears any longer, the ache in her chest hurt so badly.

  Jack had held Anna as she cried. It was the hardest she had cried since she was seven years old and found out that her parents had died and that she would never see them again.

  The truth of the matter was Anna didn’t understand her husband at all. One moment she was convinced he cared nothing for her, only that supper was on the table and the house was taken care of and Harry was looked after. Other times she caught him looking at her with desire in his eyes, he teased her, or held her when she cried, and she could almost believe that he cared about her as much as she did him. She was so confused.

  Anna felt tears begin to fill her eyes. She swiped them away and quickly sat up. She needed to talk with someone. Lucy! She would go into town and talk with Lucy. Anna had been promising to meet her for lunch anyway.

  Anna slipped from the bed. She undressed, washed and changed into a fresh dress. She started to fix her hair but couldn’t find her hairpins. She always braided her hair before bed and would leave her pins on the washstand. Come to think of it, she didn’t re
member coming back to bed. The last thing she remembered was Jack holding her as she cried. She must have fallen asleep in his arms. Did he carry her to bed? She spotted the pins on the nightstand. Had he taken down her hair too? She blushed.

  She brushed and repinned her hair before cautiously walking into the main room. The house was empty and quiet. She put away the milk and eggs and went to use the privy. She checked upstairs for Harry but her bed was empty, she had already joined her father for the day.

  Anna quickly made both beds and then her own before making a stack of sandwiches, coffee and lemonade. She packed the pail and put on a brave face as she went to look for her husband and stepdaughter.

  She checked the barn first and then the field where she had last seen Jack plowing but didn’t see any sign of Jack or Harry. She didn’t know where else to look for them and didn’t want to venture too far away from the house and get lost. She glanced down at the watch pinned to her dress. She’d best hurry, it was getting close to lunchtime and she still needed to walk to town and meet Lucy.

  Anna returned to the house. She set the pail on the table and tore a sheet of paper from her notebook and scribbled a quick note.

  Jack,

  Couldn’t find you. Meeting Lucy for lunch.

  Anna

  She put on her jacket and bonnet and left the house, walking quickly toward town.

  Anna arrived at the hotel and asked for Lucy’s room number before making her way upstairs. Second floor, last door on the left, the man at the front desk had said.

  Anna knew she didn’t look her best. She had caught a glimpse of herself in a mirror in the lobby. She looked tired and it was obvious that she had been crying. Well, there was nothing to be done about it now. She took a deep breath and knocked on the door.

  Lucy answered the door, her expression of happy surprise quickly turned into concern as she saw Anna’s face.

  Lucy dragged Anna inside and took her jacket and bonnet, urging her to sit on the sofa.

  “Anna, what is it? What’s wrong?” Lucy asked sitting down and gripping Anna’s hands, her brows furrowed.