Love Isn't Always Easy: A Lesbian Romance (The Jersey Girls Book 3)

by Lydia Rose

  “So how come you both are here working?” Erin asked when Jane left the room.

  “Didn’t Jane tell you?”

  Erin shook her head. “Tell me what.

  “After you left Jane,” Denny said averting his eyes. He cleared his throat and continued. “Ron threatened to do the same thing to me,” he sighed and moved closer. “Jane and I are still doing our show. We are working on another cookbook, but we don’t do anymore guest appearances. We both realized that what good is fame and fortune if we don’t have anyone in our lives.”

  Erin balled up the paper from her sandwich and moved to the garbage can to hide the tears that were evident in her eyes.

  Jane came back into the kitchen and Denny changed the subject. “So did you and the beautiful redhead get the bad guys?”

  Erin began to nod, but asked, “How do you know she’s beautiful?”

  He nodded toward Jane, “She told me. So?”

  “Yeah, we took down a big drug lord.”

  “That was you two?” Denny asked excited. “I read about that in the newspaper. Was the redhead a cop, too?”

  Erin chuckled. “Her name is Angie and she’s FBI.”

  “Wow,” Denny said impressed. When Jane’s back was turned, he asked, “So are you two dating?”

  Erin laughed and watched as Jane looked at her. “Angie’s straight.” Erin noticed that Jane released the breath she was holding.

  “So, what now?” Denny asked.

  “I go back to work next week.”

  “Is your leg well enough to go back to work?” Jane finally asked.

  “Yeah,” she chuckled. “I won’t be chasing down any bad guys for a while, but I’ll be fine.” Erin threw her coffee cup away. “It was good to see you both.”

  “You too, Erin,” Denny said hugging her close. “It’s good to have you back.”

  Jane timidly came over to them. “I’m glad you’re okay,” she said hugging Erin too.

  “Thanks for breakfast.” Erin walked toward the door and turned. “It was good to see you both,” she said looking directly at Jane.

  After Erin left, Jane turned her back on Denny. She didn’t want him to see her crying. Jane never heard Denny approach.

  “Why didn’t you ask her to dinner or something?” Denny said wrapping his arms around her.

  Jane wiped her eyes. “I was afraid she’d say no.”

  “She still loves you, Jane. I can see it in her eyes when she looks at you.” Jane nodded in agreement. “I told her that you and I have slowed down.”

  “What did she say?”

  “Nothing, but she seemed surprised.”

  “Don’t let your pride get in the way of you two getting back together.” Denny let her go and went back to his station.

  “I’m so afraid, Denny.” Jane didn’t know if she could handle another rejection from Erin.

  “I know you are, but she’s worth the risk.”

  “Yeah, she is.”

  ****

  Erin left the store and drove over to Jane’s grandmother’s house. She knocked on the door.

  “Erin,” Abby squealed as she opened the door. “You left without saying good bye to me.”

  “I’m sorry, Abby.” She returned the hug that Abby now had her in.

  “You had Jane so worried about you.”

  “Couldn’t be helped, Abby,” Erin said with a shrug.

  “She told me you broke up with her.” Abby watched as Erin shrugged. “I heard that girl crying her heart out so many nights.”

  Erin looked at her feet as Abby led her into the kitchen. Abby poured them both a cup of coffee.

  “She was worse after she saw you that night at the apartment. Jane said you looked like you were a drug addict.”

  “That was the point, Abby.”

  “She was so jealous of that woman you were with.” Abby grinned. “I told her it had to be someone you were working with.”

  “Angie was my partner. There was nothing going on except the assignment.”

  “I told her that, but she didn’t believe me.” Abby took Erin’s hand. “She believed she could never win you back after that night.”

  Erin didn’t comment. Her thoughts were in a jumble.

  “Have you seen Jane yet?”

  “I just came from the store. I had breakfast with her and Denny.”

  “Jane isn’t working non-stop anymore,” Abby offered quietly.

  “I know. Denny told me.”

  “I want you to come to dinner tonight,” Abby said.

  “I don’t think that’s a good idea, Abby.”

  “Why?”

  Erin shrugged, not having a good excuse.

  Abby picked up the empty coffee cups. “Go do what you have to and come back at six thirty.”

  Erin stood up.

  “And don’t think I didn’t notice that limp. You’ll tell me about it tonight.”

  “Yes, ma’am,” Erin said as she limped toward the front door.

  CHAPTER THIRTY

  At six thirty, Erin walked to the door. Before she could knock or ring the bell, the door opened.

  “Hello, Erin. Please come inside,” Abby said smiling.

  Erin glanced around, but didn’t see Jane.

  “She’s upstairs getting changed. Come into the kitchen and I’ll get you something to drink.”

  Jane started down the stairs. “What are we having tonight, Gran?” she asked and then stopped in her tracks when she saw Erin. “Hi,” she said bashfully.

  “Hi.” Erin’s response was just as shy, but her eyes never left Jane’s face.

  “Both of you sit down so I can get the food on the table.”

  “I’ll help you, Gran,” Jane offered.

  Abby pointed with her finger. “Sit down.”

  Jane giggled and glanced at Erin. “She is still bossy.”

  “I know. That’s why I’m sitting here,” Erin said with a chuckle too.

  As they began eating, Abby started her questions. “So are you going to tell me about that leg?” Abby pointed with her fork.

  Jane didn’t give Erin time to answer, “She was shot.”

  Erin rolled her eyes at Jane. “It was just a scratch, Abby. I’m fine.”

  “So tell me about this case you were on?” Abby asked.

  Again Jane answered. “Erin took down a drug lord.”

  “Oh my god,” Abby said shocked.

  Erin turned to Jane. “Would you stop, please?”

  Jane giggled. “You would just tell her it was no big deal. Gran, did you read about that drug bust in the paper.”

  Abby looked at Erin. “That was you?”

  “Me, and a lot of other people.”

  “So the redhead was your partner?” Abby asked looking at Jane as if to say I told you so.

  Erin rolled her eyes again and looked at Jane.

  “Her name is Angie. She’s FBI.” Jane answered for Erin again.

  “Well I’m glad you are home safe, Erin. Don’t go away for that long again. We both missed you so much.”

  “I missed being here, too.” Erin admitted looking at Abby.

  “So you don’t have any plans to leave us again?”

  “No plans, Abby.”

  “Good,” Abby answered.

  They all helped clean up the kitchen together, but Abby chased them out of the room while she made the coffee.

  Erin took a seat on the couch as Jane sat in the chair next to her.

  “I’m sorry if Abby forced you into coming tonight,” Jane said leaning toward Erin.

  “I missed your grandmother and she is just as good a cook as you are,” Erin said smiling. “You would cringe if you saw what I had been eating. There was nothing healthy in sight,” Erin said chuckling.

  Jane lowered her eyes. “Did you miss me, too?” She asked barely above a whisper.

  “Yes,” Erin said softly without looking at Jane. “I thought about you a lot even though I tried not to.”

  “Why didn’t you want to
think about me?”

  “Because I was doing a dangerous job. I had to keep my mind on my work, but you were never far from my thoughts.”

  “You were always on my mind, Erin. I bribed a friend of Denny’s to let me know if he ever saw your light come on in the apartment.” Jane sighed. “I know you weren’t happy to see me that night.”

  “I’m sorry, but I knew the next day was going to be dangerous and I needed my mind clear.”

  “When I saw you with Angie, I thought she was…” Jane couldn’t say the words.

  “I know you did.” Erin’s eyes lowered just as her voice grew husky. “I’m sorry that I couldn’t tell you who she was.”

  Abby came into the living room carrying a tray with the coffee and dessert. “I heard you are partial to chocolate mousse?”

  “I am, Abby,” she said with a glance at Jane who sat there smiling.

  “Then eat up. This old lady needs her rest.”

  After dessert, Jane and Erin offered to finish cleaning up.

  “Then I will leave you two to it.” Abby hugged Erin. “It’s good to have you back. Don’t be a stranger.”

  “Thank you for dinner, Abby.”

  “Good night, girls.” Abby waved before walking up the stairs.

  The dishes were added to the dishwasher and Jane turned it on.

  “I guess I should be going,” Erin said leaving the kitchen.

  “You aren’t working tomorrow. Why don’t you sit down and relax.”

  “Aren’t you working tomorrow?”

  “I’m off, too.”

  Erin sat down on the couch again, but this time Jane sat next to her.

  “I’m sorry for what I put you through. I know you left to get away from me.” Jane’s voice became emotional. “If something had happened to you, I would never have forgiven myself.” She wiped at the tears that dropped onto her cheek.

  Erin took Jane’s hand without a thought. “I’m fine, Jane.” She wiped at the tears on Jane’s cheek. Instead of removing her hand, she caressed Jane’s cheek.

  “Yes, but something worse could have happened to you.” Jane’s crying became harder.

  Erin moved closer to her and Jane automatically rested her head on Erin’s shoulder. Erin ran her fingers across Jane’s hand. “Don’t cry I’m here.” She sighed, “I’m very capable of taking care of myself.”

  “What does that mean?” Jane asked looking up into Erin’s face.

  “I’ll tell you about it one day,” Erin said, not wanting to get into her career in the military.

  “I love you, Erin.” Jane lifted her head and looked at Erin. “Can we try again? I promise to never put you second in my life.”

  Erin glanced at Jane’s lips just before she captured her mouth with hers. She tried not to deepen the kiss, but Jane grabbed her neck and pulled her closer. When they came up for air, Erin kissed her mouth again with a soft kiss. “I love you too, Jane. I never stopped loving you.”

  “Good because I never stopped loving you,” Jane said before she came back for another kiss. “Would you stay with me tonight?” Jane whispered into Erin’s ear.

  Erin stood up and pulled Jane off the couch. “What about your grandmother?”

  “You’re right. Maybe we should go to your place.” Erin nodded. “Be right back.”

  Jane went to her room and packed a bag. She knocked on her grandmother’s door.

  “You’re leaving?” Abby asked.

  “Yeah, Gran.”

  “See you tomorrow, dear.” Abby smiled. “I’m happy for both of you.”

  “I’m happy too, Gran.” Jane kissed her grandmother’s cheek.

  Jane quickly came down the steps and handed her bag to Erin as she closed the lights. “I’m ready. Let’s go.” She took Erin’s hand and led her out of the house.

  When they got to the apartment, Erin put Jane’s bag down. “I’m excited, Jane, but I’m nervous too.”

  Jane pressed her body against Erin’s sending her into overdrive. “Relax, baby. It’s only me. We’re about to do something we’ve done dozens of time, but if you aren’t ready yet,” Jane ran her finger down Erin’s chest, “we can just go to sleep.” She stepped away, but rested her palm against Erin’s stomach.

  Erin didn’t answer as she pulled Jane into her body. The fire was stoked from Jane’s gentle stroking. Erin forgot about being nervous. She kissed Jane with so much passion, she almost melted on the spot. Erin’s grin was evident as she pulled back and picked up Jane. She carried her to the bedroom and placed her on the bed. Erin had to taste her now. She needed to feel the woman who had invaded her mind for so long.

  ****

  In the morning as Jane slept against Erin’s back, she stretched out the muscles she hadn’t used for months.

  “Good morning,” Jane said against her back.

  Erin rolled over to face her. “Morning.” She kissed Jane’s lips softly. “Are you as happy as I am this morning?”

  “Very,” Jane answered.

  “I want you to move in with me.” Erin held her breath as she waited for Jane’s answer.

  “Yes.”

  “Just like that. No arguments.”

  “Why would I argue? I’m not letting you out of my sight again. You will never have to doubt my love again.” Jane sat up and got out of bed.

  “Where are you going?”

  “To the bathroom to grab a shower.”

  “Are you leaving?”

  “Not a chance,” Jane said curling her finger for Erin to follow.

  A second invitation wasn’t required as Erin followed Jane into the bathroom.

  Jane was making them both something to eat when she turned from the stove, “Don’t think I’ve forgotten that you told Denny it wasn’t the first time you were shot.”

  “You caught that?” Erin asked softly.

  “I did and you are going to tell me all about it.”

  After their snack, Jane led them to the living room. “Okay, let’s hear it.”

  “When my parents found out I was a lesbian, I was in my senior year. I was two weeks away from graduating when they threw me out of the house.”

  “I knew they didn’t approve of your lifestyle, but I never imagined that.”

  “It was okay. I spoke to my guidance counselor and he saw I had enough credits to graduate. Then I joined the service.”

  “You were in the military?” Jane asked shocked.

  “I was in for eight years.”

  “Were you in Afghanistan?” Jane asked holding Erin’s hand.

  “Yes, and Iraq for two deployments. I thought I was going to make the military my career since I had nothing to come home to, but…”

  “But what?” Jane asked anxiously.

  “I got shot in the arm in my first deployment and the second time I was shot in the head.”

  “What?” Jane screamed.

  “The bullet didn’t go through my head.” Erin’s hand came up to her head. “Just through the side.” She grinned. “That’s why I keep my hair longer.”

  “Let me see.” Jane moved Erin’s hair away from her scalp and saw the long scar. “You could have been killed.”

  “I know and that’s why I quit. I figured the third time I might not be so lucky. So I left the military and went to the police academy.”

  “Where people are still trying to shoot you,” Jane said shaking her head.

  “Jane, I’m safe here. When this position opened up, I knew it would be less money, but I wouldn’t be putting my life in danger every day.”

  “Let me see your other scar?”

  Erin lifted her sleeve.

  “I thought that was a birthmark.”

  “Yeah, they did a good job stitching me up.”

  “Then I made you want to get away from me so much that someone shot you again.” Jane’s hands went to her face.

  “Jane, they picked me for this assignment because of my military background.”

  “But you never would have taken it if you didn
’t think I was putting you second in my life.”

  “Maybe I would have taken the assignment anyway. It’s going to help my career.”

  Jane decided not to argue. “Did your parents ever find out you were injured?”

  “They didn’t even know I was in the military, but when I got shot in the head…” Erin scowled. “One of my friends contacted my family and told them.” Erin smirked. “I was pissed off, but it didn’t matter,” she now sighed. “They never contacted me. I guess they figured I would be better off dead than gay.”

  “I can’t believe what you have gone through.” Jane punched Erin’s arm.

  “What did you do that for?” Erin asked rubbing her arm.

  “Because then you went out and put your life in danger again catching those drug guys.”

  “We were very careful. A lot of people had our backs.”

  Jane hit her again. “And you still got shot.” She now rubbed Erin’s arm. “I’m sorry, but you’ve taken a lot of chances with your life.”

  “I’m fine now, Jane.” Erin kissed her lips softly.

  “I want you to ask Angie for dinner one night.”

  “Why?”

  “I would like to meet her properly and thank her for taking care of you.”

  “You don’t have to do that,” Erin insisted. “Besides, I don’t trust you two meeting,” she said with a grin.

  “Why? You said she’s straight.”

  “Yeah, but she said you were even more beautiful in person than on TV. She might jump the fence to be with you,” Erin was now laughing.

  “You are so funny. Give me her number and I’ll call her.”

  Erin shook her head defeated. “I’ll call her.”

  CHAPTER THIRTY ONE

  The following evening Jane walked into her grandmother’s home. “Hi, Gran.”

  “Hello, dear, will Erin be joining us for dinner?”

  “No, Gran. She’s meeting with Casey this evening.”

  As they ate their meal, Jane broke the news. “Gran, Erin wants me to move in with her.”

  Her grandmother put down her fork. “Is this something you want to do?”

  “Yes, Gran, I want to go to bed each night with Erin. I want to wake up to her each morning and on our days off, spend the day in bed if that’s what we want to do.”