Complete Works of Fyodor Dostoyevsky

by Fyodor Dostoyevsky

  He wouldn’t have been himself if he could have dispensed with the cheap gibing free-thought which was in vogue in his day. Now, at any rate, he comforted himself with a gibe, but not for long.

  “Oh, if that day after to-morrow, that Sunday, might never come!” he exclaimed suddenly, this time in utter despair. “Why could not this one week be without a Sunday — si le miracle exists? What would it be to Providence to blot out one Sunday from the calendar? If only to prove His power to the atheists et que tout soit dit! Oh, how I loved her! Twenty years, these twenty years, and she has never understood me!”

  “But of whom are you talking? Even I don’t understand you!” I asked, wondering.

  “Vingt ans! And she has not once understood me; oh, it’s cruel! And can she really believe that I am marrying from fear, from poverty? Oh, the shame of it! Oh, Auntie, Auntie, I do it for you! . . . Oh, let her know, that Auntie, that she is the one woman I have adored for twenty years! She must learn this, it must be so, if not they will need force to drag me under ce qu’on appelle le wedding-crown.”

  It was the first time I had heard this confession, and so vigorously uttered. I won’t conceal the fact that I was terribly tempted to laugh. I was wrong.

  “He is the only one left me now, the only one, my one hope!” he cried suddenly, clasping his hands as though struck by a new idea. “Only he, my poor boy, can save me now, and, oh, why doesn’t he come! Oh, my son, oh, my Petrusha. . . . And though I do not deserve the name of father, but rather that of tiger, yet . . . Laissez-moi, mon ami, I’ll lie down a little, to collect my ideas. I am so tired, so tired. And I think it’s time you were in bed. Voyez vous, it’s twelve o’clock. . . .”

  CHAPTER IV.

  THE CRIPPLE

  SHATOV WAS NOT PERVERSE but acted on my note, and called at midday on Lizaveta Nikolaevna. We went in almost together; I was also going to make my first call. They were all, that is Liza, her mother, and Mavriky Nikolaevitch, sitting in the big drawing-room, arguing. The mother was asking Liza to play some waltz on the piano, and as soon as Liza began to play the piece asked for, declared it was not the right one. Mavriky Nikolaevitch in the simplicity of his heart took Liza’s part, maintaining that it was the right waltz. The elder lady was so angry that she began to cry. She was ill and walked with difficulty. Her legs were swollen, and for the last few days she had been continually fractious, quarrelling with every one, though she always stood rather in awe of Liza. They were pleased to see us. Liza flushed with pleasure, and saying “merci” to me, on Shatov’s account of course, went to meet him, looking at him with interest.

  Shatov stopped awkwardly in the doorway. Thanking him for coming she led him up to her mother.

  “This is Mr. Shatov, of whom I have told you, and this is Mr. G —— v, a great friend of mine and of Stepan Trofimovitch’s. Mavriky Nikolaevitch made his acquaintance yesterday, too.”

  “And which is the professor?”

  “There’s no professor at all, maman.”

  “But there is. You said yourself that there’d be a professor. It’s this one, probably.” She disdainfully indicated Shatov.

  “I didn’t tell you that there’d be a professor. Mr. G —— v is

  in the service, and Mr. Shatov is a former student.”

  “A student or professor, they all come from the university just the same. You only want to argue. But the Swiss one had moustaches and a beard.”

  “It’s the son of Stepan Trofimovitch that maman always calls the professor,” said Liza, and she took Shatov away to the sofa at the other end of the drawing-room.

  “When her legs swell, she’s always like this, you understand she’s ill,” she whispered to Shatov, still with the same marked curiosity, scrutinising him, especially his shock of hair.

  “Are you an officer?” the old lady inquired of me. Liza had mercilessly abandoned me to her.

  “N-no. — I’m in the service. . . .”

  “Mr. G —— v is a great friend of Stepan Trofimovitch’s,” Liza chimed in immediately.

  “Are you in Stepan Trofimovitch’s service? Yes, and he’s a professor, too, isn’t he?”

  “Ah, maman, you must dream at night of professors,” cried Liza with annoyance.

  “I see too many when I’m awake. But you always will contradict your mother. Were you here four years ago when Nikolay Vsyevolodovitch was in the neighbourhood?”

  I answered that I was.

  “And there was some Englishman with you?”

  “No, there was not.”

  Liza laughed.

  “Well, you see there was no Englishman, so it must have been idle gossip. And Varvara Petrovna and Stepan Trofimovitch both tell lies. And they all tell lies.”

  “Auntie and Stepan Trofimovitch yesterday thought there was a resemblance between Nikolay Vsyevolodovitch and Prince Harry in Shakespeare’s Henry IV, and in answer to that maman says that there was no Englishman here,” Liza explained to us.

  “If Harry wasn’t here, there was no Englishman. It was no one else but Nikolay Vsyevolodovitch at his tricks.”

  “I assure you that maman’s doing it on purpose,” Liza thought necessary to explain to Shatov. “She’s really heard of Shakespeare. I read her the first act of Othello myself. But she’s in great pain now. Maman, listen, it’s striking twelve, it’s time you took your medicine.”

  “The doctor’s come,” a maid-servant announced at the door.

  The old lady got up and began calling her dog: “Zemirka, Zemirka, you come with me at least.”

  Zemirka, a horrid little old dog, instead of obeying, crept under the sofa where Liza was sitting.

  “Don’t you want to? Then I don’t want you. Good-bye, my good sir, I don’t know your name or your father’s,” she said, addressing me.

  “Anton Lavrentyevitch . . .”

  “Well, it doesn’t matter, with me it goes in at one ear and out of the other. Don’t you come with me, Mavriky Nikolaevitch, it was Zemirka I called. Thank God I can still walk without help and to-morrow I shall go for a drive.”

  She walked angrily out of the drawing-room.

  “Anton Lavrentyevitch, will you talk meanwhile to Mavriky Nikolaevitch; I assure you you’ll both be gainers by getting to know one another better,” said Liza, and she gave a friendly smile to Mavriky Nikolaevitch, who beamed all over as she looked at him. There was no help for it, I remained to talk to Mavriky Nikolaevitch.

  II

  Lizaveta Nikolaevna’s business with Shatov turned out, to my surprise, to be really only concerned with literature. I had imagined, I don’t know why, that she had asked him to come with some other object. We, Mavriky Nikolaevitch and I that is, seeing that they were talking aloud and not trying to hide anything from us, began to listen, and at last they asked our advice. It turned out that Lizaveta Nikolaevna was thinking of bringing out a book which she thought would be of use, but being quite inexperienced she needed some one to help her. The earnestness with which she began to explain her plan to Shatov quite surprised me.

  “She must be one of the new people,” I thought. “She has not been to Switzerland for nothing.”

  Shatov listened with attention, his eyes fixed on the ground, showing not the slightest surprise that a giddy young lady in society should take up work that seemed so out of keeping with her.

  Her literary scheme was as follows. Numbers of papers and journals are published in the capitals and the provinces of Russia, and every day a number of events are reported in them. The year passes, the newspapers are everywhere folded up and put away in cupboards, or are torn up and become litter, or are used for making parcels or wrapping things. Numbers of these facts make an impression and are remembered by the public, but in the course of years they are forgotten. Many people would like to look them up, but it is a labour for them to embark upon this sea of paper, often knowing nothing of the day or place or even year in which the incident occurred. Yet if all the facts for a whole year were brought together into one b
ook, on a definite plan, and with a definite object, under headings with references, arranged according to months and days, such a compilation might reflect the characteristics of Russian life for the whole year, even though the facts published are only a small fraction of the events that take place.

  “Instead of a number of newspapers there would be a few fat books, that’s all,” observed Shatov.

  But Lizaveta Nikolaevna clung to her idea, in spite of the difficulty of carrying it out and her inability to describe it. “It ought to be one book, and not even a very thick one,” she maintained. But even if it were thick it would be clear, for the great point would be the plan and the character of the presentation of facts. Of course not all would be collected and reprinted. . The decrees and acts of government, local regulations, laws — all such facts, however important, might be altogether omitted from the proposed publication. They could leave out a great deal and confine themselves to a selection of events more or less characteristic of the moral life of the people, of the personal character of the Russian people at the present moment. Of course everything might be put in: strange incidents, fires, public subscriptions, anything good or bad, every speech or word, perhaps even floodings of the rivers, perhaps even some government decrees, but only such things to be selected as are characteristic of the period; everything would be put in with a certain view, a special significance and intention, with an idea which would illuminate the facts looked at in the aggregate, as a whole. And finally the book ought to be interesting even for light reading, apart from its value as a work of reference. It would be, so to say, a presentation of the spiritual, moral, inner life of Russia for a whole year.

  “We want every one to buy it, we want it to be a book that will be found on every table,” Liza declared. “I understand that all lies in the plan, and that’s why I apply to you,” she concluded. She grew very warm over it, and although her explanation was obscure and incomplete, Shatov began to understand.

  “So it would amount to something with a political tendency, a selection of facts with a special tendency,” he muttered, still not raising his head.

  “Not at all, we must not select with a particular bias, and we ought not to have any political tendency in it. Nothing but impartiality — that will be the only tendency.”

  “But a tendency would be no harm,” said Shatov, with a slight movement, “and one can hardly avoid it if there is any selection at all. The very selection of facts will suggest how they are to be understood. Your idea is not a bad one.”

  “Then such a book is possible?” cried Liza delightedly.

  “We must look into it and consider. It’s an immense undertaking. One can’t work it out on the spur of the moment. We need experience. And when we do publish the book I doubt whether we shall find out how to do it. Possibly after many trials; but the thought is alluring. It’s a useful idea.”

  He raised his eyes at last, and they were positively sparkling with pleasure, he was so interested.

  “Was it your own idea?” he asked Liza, in a friendly and, as it were, bashful way.

  “The idea’s no trouble, you know, it’s the plan is the trouble,” Liza smiled. “I understand very little. I am not very clever, and I only pursue what is clear to me, myself. . . .”

  “Pursue?”

  “Perhaps that’s not the right word?” Liza inquired quickly.

  “The word is all right; I meant nothing.”

  “I thought while I was abroad that even I might be of some use. I have money of my own lying idle. Why shouldn’t I — even I — work for the common cause? Besides, the idea somehow occurred to me all at once of itself. I didn’t invent it at all, and was delighted with it. But I saw at once that I couldn’t get on without some one to help, because I am not competent to do anything of myself. My helper, of course, would be the co-editor of the book. We would go halves. You would give the plan and the work. Mine would be the original idea and the means for publishing it. Would the book pay its expenses, do you think?”

  “If we hit on a good plan the book will go.”

  “I warn you that I am not doing it for profit; but I am very anxious that the book should circulate and should be very proud of making a profit.”

  “Well, but how do I come in?”

  “Why, I invite you to be my fellow-worker, to go halves. You will think out the plan.”

  “How do you know that I am capable of thinking out the plan?”

  “People have talked about you to me, and here I’ve heard

  ... I know that you are very clever and . . . are working for the cause . . . and think a great deal. Pyotr Stepanovitch Verhovensky spoke about you in Switzerland,” she added hurriedly. “He’s a very clever man, isn’t he?”

  Shatov stole a fleeting, momentary glance at her, but dropped his eyes again.

  “Nikolay Vsyevolodovitch told me a great deal about you, too.”

  Shatov suddenly turned red.

  “But here are the newspapers.” Liza hurriedly picked up from a chair a bundle of newspapers that lay tied up ready. “I’ve tried to mark the facts here for selection, to sort them, and I have put the papers together . . . you will see.”

  Shatov took the bundle.

  “Take them home and look at them. Where do you live?”

  “In Bogoyavlensky Street, Filipov’s house.”

  “I know. I think it’s there, too, I’ve been told, a captain lives, beside you, Mr. Lebyadkin,” said Liza in the same hurried manner.

  Shatov sat for a full minute with the bundle in his outstretched hand, making no answer and staring at the floor.

  “You’d better find some one else for these jobs. I shouldn’t suit you at all,” he brought out at last, dropping his voice in an awfully strange way, almost to a whisper.

  Liza flushed crimson.

  “What jobs are you speaking of? Mavriky Nikolaevitch,” she cried, “please bring that letter here.”

  I too followed Mavriky Nikolaevitch to the table,

  “Look at this,” she turned suddenly to me, unfolding the letter in great excitement. “Have you ever seen anything like it. Please read it aloud. I want Mr. Shatov to hear it too.”

  With no little astonishment I read aloud the following missive:

  “To the.

  Perfection, Miss Tushin.

  “Gracious Lady

  “Lizaveta Nikolaevna!

  “Oh, she’s a sweet queen, Lizaveta Tushin!

  When on side-saddle she gallops by,

  And in the breeze her fair tresses fly!

  Or when with her mother in church she bows low

  And on devout faces a red flush doth flow!

  Then for the joys of lawful wedlock I aspire,

  And follow her and her mother with tears of desire.

  “Composed by an unlearned man in the midst of a discussion.

  “Gracious Lady!

  “I pity myself above all men that I did not lose my arm at Sevastopol, not having been there at all, but served all the campaign delivering paltry provisions, which I look on as a degradation. You are a goddess of antiquity, and I am nothing, but have had a glimpse of infinity. Look on it as a poem and no more, for, after all, poetry is nonsense and justifies what would be considered impudence in prose. Can the sun be angry with the infusoria if the latter composes verses to her from the drop of water, where there is a multitude of them if you look through the microscope? Even the club for promoting humanity to the larger animals in tip-top society in Petersburg, winch rightly feels compassion for dogs and horses, despises the brief infusoria making no reference to it whatever, because it is not big enough. I’m not big enough either. The idea of marriage might seem droll, but soon I shall have property worth two hundred souls through a misanthropist whom you ought to despise. I can tell a lot and I can undertake to produce documents that would mean Siberia. Don’t despise my proposal. A letter from an infusoria is of course in verse.

  “Captain Lebyadkin your most humble friend

  An
d he has time no end.”

  “That was written by a man in a drunken condition, a worthless fellow,” I cried indignantly. “I know him.”

  “That letter I received yesterday,” Liza began to explain, flushing and speaking hurriedly. “I saw myself, at once, that it came from some foolish creature, and I haven’t yet shown it to maman, for fear of upsetting her more. But if he is going to keep on like that, I don’t know how to act. Mavriky Nikolaevitch wants to go out and forbid him to do it. As I have looked upon you as a colleague,” she turned to Shatov, “and as you live there, I wanted to question you so as to judge what more is to be expected of him.”

  “He’s a drunkard and a worthless fellow,” Shatov muttered with apparent reluctance.

  “Is he always so stupid?”

  “No, he’s not stupid at all when he’s not drunk.”

  “I used to know a general who wrote verses exactly like that,” I observed, laughing.

  “One can see from the letter that he is clever enough for his own purposes,” Mavriky Nikolaevitch, who had till then been silent, put in unexpectedly.

  “He lives with some sister?” Liza queried.

  “Yes, with his sister.”

  “They say he tyrannises over her, is that true?”

  Shatov looked at Liza again, scowled, and muttering, “What business is it of mine?” moved towards the door.

  “Ah, stay!” cried Liza, in a flutter. “Where are you going? We have so much still to talk over. . . .”