Resisting the Hero

by Cindi Madsen

  …

  Connor had gone back and forth about asking Faith out, not sure if he dared cross that line or not. But when he saw her tonight in the kitchen… All he knew for sure was that over the past several days, he’d missed seeing her. She was sexy, sure—he couldn’t help notice the way her shirt stretched across her breasts and the hint of lace he could see through the pale pink fabric.

  Faith cleared her throat, drawing his eyes back to her face, and he gave her a sheepish grin. She’d been staring at him earlier, so he figured they were about even. But it only reemphasized the other reasons he was attracted to her. He had to work to keep up with her. He was never sure where their conversations would go, but the more she talked, the more he wanted to know. He liked how hard she fought to hide her smile when he shamelessly flirted with her, and he liked even more when she lost the battle. That smile stirred a longing deep in his gut that made him crave more.

  “All done!” Ella said, tossing her bowl and spoon onto the table. She was covered in chocolate and melted pink ice cream, with a couple of rainbow sprinkles stuck to her cheek. She was a dang cute kid, with as much energy as two of his nieces or nephews combined.

  Faith grabbed a wad of napkins and wiped at Ella’s face. The kid reared back, ducking away from the napkin. “Just hold still, Ella,” Faith said. Pieces of paper clung to the ice cream on her cheeks where Faith had managed to make contact. “I should’ve brought some of those wipey thingies Anna always has in the diaper bag. These dry napkins aren’t doing much against the stickiness.”

  Ella stood in the highchair, the legs rocking.

  Faith shot up at the same time he did. He steadied the chair as Faith pulled Ella out. The two-year-old repaid her by hugging her tightly and wiping her face across Faith’s light shirt. “Awesome,” she mumbled. “Whose idea was ice cream anyway?” She flashed Connor a look, but there was teasing behind it and it sent a burst of warmth through his chest.

  Faith took Ella to the bathroom to clean her up while Connor cleared their table of trash. When she came back, Ella’s face was scrubbed clean and Faith’s shirt was damp in the spot where she’d had ice cream a moment ago. It made it even more see-through, but he restrained himself from staring.

  As they walked outside, he put his hand on Faith’s back. She glanced at him but didn’t say anything, so he kept it there. “We should go to the park,” he said. “Let Ella burn off the sugar high.”

  Faith lifted her eyes to the dimming sky. “It’s getting dark.”

  “Exactly. We can take her home nice and tired. Trust me, Kaleb and Anna will thank us.”

  He put gentle pressure on her back, guiding her toward the crosswalk that’d take them to the park with the playground instead of the van.

  She let out a sigh and then gave in to his touch. His heart thudded and he was pretty sure his smile had morphed to a goofy grin, but he didn’t care. When they got to the park, Ella wiggled down and tore off toward the plastic jungle gym.

  The park was set up with a fence around the smaller playground, perfect for little tykes like Ella and his nieces and nephews. Only one way out, and it was next to the two benches flanking the opening. Genius planning, actually, he’d learned, after one of his nephews made a break for it and he’d barely caught him in time.

  Connor took Faith’s hand and pulled her onto the nearby bench. She tugged free of his grasp and crossed her arms like they were in some kind of showdown. If they were, he was definitely going to win.

  “Shouldn’t you be out at the bars right now, picking up gullible, ditzy women?” she asked.

  Connor clicked his tongue. “Blondie, Blondie, Blondie. How little you know me.” He draped his arm over the bench and wound his fingers through her hair. “Once I set my sights on something…” His eyes moved to her lips. He caught a whiff of her perfume, an exotic yet light scent that made him want to lean closer and take a deep inhale.

  “Connor,” she said in a warning tone. “You remember we’re just friends, and can only be friends, right?”

  “Of course,” he said, leaving his hand in the silky strands. “I was hoping you remembered. I didn’t want to remind you, though, because it’d be so awkward.”

  She laughed, shaking her head, like she always seemed to when he said anything. “You’re too much.”

  “Or am I just the right amount?”

  “Definitely too much.”

  He let his leg rest against hers, taking deep breaths to control his response to being so close to her—they were at a park, after all. Ella came down the slide with a screech, then immediately tore up the plastic steps again.

  Faith glanced at him, the overhead lights glowing in her eyes. “You take on everything head first, don’t you? Don’t think, just act and let the cards fall wherever, no thought to what happens after.”

  “Is there any other way?” he asked, though she’d pegged him wrong. Sure, on several things he dove right in and figured he’d deal with whatever consequences arose. But when it came to other aspects of his life, like relationships and tying himself to other people, or going into a hostile situation, or even working on a case, he thought things through more than most. “There are things you can control. But then there are times you have to learn to let go and see what happens.

  “You know what we should do,” he said, and before she could answer or try to change the subject, he quickly charged on. “My friend, Wes, and his fiancée, Dani, have an adventure tour business. You fly in a helicopter to one of the national parks to hike, cliff dive, or swim in a lake most people don’t even know exists—it’s such a rush. All your worries, everything—it just disappears for a while.”

  Two creases formed between her eyebrows. “I’m pretty sure cliff diving into a lake with slimy creatures would give me more worries, not less.”

  “I should’ve known you’d be too scared.”

  She spun to face him. “I am not scared.”

  That obviously hit a sore spot, and he figured he could work with that. “Prove it.”

  “I don’t have to prove anything to you.” She twisted back to face the playground and went back to her crossed-arm position. “You drive me crazy.”

  “Right back at you. Just imagine how that chemistry would transfer to the bedr—”

  She slapped a hand over his mouth. “Don’t finish that.”

  He grinned under her hand. Getting her all fired up was so damn fun. Possibly contrary to getting her to agree to go out with him, but too addicting to totally give up. He was trying not to think about what her brother would say if he actually talked her into it. He just wanted to focus on being here with her now.

  He jerked his chin toward the swings. “Care to see who can go higher?” It was a cheesy move he swore he’d never make, but his sisters had forced him to watch lots of awful romance movies, and women went crazy for that kind of stuff.

  Faith didn’t answer, but he could see she was thinking about it, so he took her hand and tugged her toward the swings. They waved at Ella as they passed and he sat in one of the seats—man, they really pinched the butt. His legs were dragging, too. This might end up being humiliating instead of winning him points.

  Faith sat on the other swing, and soon they were soaring through the air, his feet occasionally dragging the bottom. The higher she went, the more the streetlamp lit up her face, and the bigger her smile got. Connor kept glancing over at Ella’s blond head bobbing around, keeping an eye on her as well.

  If any of the guys from the department saw this, they’d give him so much hell. But then Faith smiled and kicked his swing, sending him off course, so he didn’t really care.

  Connor’s phone chirped and he dug it out, hanging tight to one side of the swing. A text from Kaleb, checking in. He sent a message that they’d head back in a few minutes and asked about Anna. Got a response that she was fine.

  By the time he was done, he was no longer swinging. Faith jumped off her swing and headed over to Ella, who was at the top of the twisty slide. Co
nnor couldn’t hear what they were saying, just the low murmur of voices.

  He walked up to Faith and put his hand on the small of her back—he’d decided it belonged there. “Ready to go?” he asked.

  “Nooo!” Ella shrieked, and ran in the other direction, across the bridge and toward the other slide.

  “I’ll get her,” Connor said. Without a second thought, he leaned in and kissed Faith’s cheek.

  Her green eyes peered up at him, and he could tell she was about to say that they needed to stay just friends again.

  “My bad,” he said with a grin. “I meant, I’ll go get her, buddy ol’ pal.” He gently punched Faith’s shoulder, and then headed after Ella. As soon as he’d wrestled the wiggly little girl onto his shoulders, he caught back up to Faith. In the two minutes it’d taken to get Ella, Faith had thrown up her walls again. When he neared her, she strode ahead of him.

  Somehow he had to show her there was more to him than met the eye. Like a Transformer, he thought with a smile. Eventually, he’d get her to go out with him. Then he’d win her over. Whether it was their first date or their twentieth.

  That thought brought him up short. He wasn’t sure where it’d come from. Twenty dates with one girl?

  Then he looked at the girl.

  For the first time in a long time, he thought that maybe he could get down with that.

  Chapter Seven

  Faith was going to do it today. She really was this time. She’d survived her first couple weeks of being in Cornelius, seeing all the familiar sights and Daddy’s picture in the Rusty Anchor. So today she’d face down the last of her demons. Show that she could employ the stress coping mechanisms she’d learned in college to get through something she’d avoided since she was sixteen years old. That way, when she counseled other people to use them, she could declare that they worked without feeling like a hypocrite. She climbed into her car, telling herself that she was in a tiny town, and knew the police station was filled with good guys, including her brother—and, okay, Connor.

  Still, her hands shook as she gripped the wheel. She’d always gone out of her way, often taking the longer route, to avoid the area of town where Daddy had been shot. He’d been off duty, fueling up the car at the gas station, when he’d heard gunfire. He’d grabbed his gun, charged into the store, and took out the man firing on innocent people. But he hadn’t realized the man’s accomplice was in the back of the store. Even after Daddy had been shot, he’d managed to take out the threat, saving everyone else. They’d called him a hero—and he was.

  But he was also her dad, and now he was gone.

  Faith exhaled a long breath and pointed the AC at her face. After that day, she’d avoided convenience stores for months. Kaleb would fill up her gas tank before she had to ask—once he’d forgotten, though, and she’d run out of gas in the middle of town and had to call him to pick her up. That was about the time Doctor Schaeffer convinced Mom to see a therapist to help her cope, and recommended Faith and Kaleb see one, too.

  By the end of her senior year, Faith could visit the gas station on the far end of town, though she’d still dreaded every time she had to fill up. When she’d packed for college, Kaleb had asked if she’d be okay fueling her car on her way to Atlanta. She’d said of course, even though she was secretly afraid she wouldn’t be.

  It’d been a long time since she’d feared a gas station. But she wanted to prove she wasn’t scared anymore. Those criminals didn’t determine where she got gas or bought a pack of gum. It was just a store, and her Jetta was low on fuel. The other place was opposite the way she needed to go.

  Now I’m building it up too much. Giving it too much power.

  Let’s see… New perspective. Once I prove it’s okay for me to go to this part of town, I can start shopping at Leila’s Boutique. She has the cutest necklaces around, and my other one from there got lost in one of my moves.

  Yesterday Connor had mentioned going on an adventure tour. She wanted to be the kind of girl who did something like that, instead of overanalyzing all the ways she could get hurt. She’d always been like that, even before she lost Daddy, but it got even worse after. She’d even moved a few times because she felt like her neighbors might be criminals or that the apartment complex wasn’t safe enough. Jeff had accused her of being too scared of everything, which was why it irritated her so much for Connor to do the same.

  Funny enough—in the way that wasn’t actually funny—guys were the part of her life she’d never analyzed enough. She got all wrapped up in one, in the kissing and butterflies, forgetting all the ways that her heart could get hurt, which was worse than a broken leg or arm in a lot of ways. That was what she’d realized when she’d been hammering out a legal agreement with Jeff, unable to deal with trying to find an internship while she was working through having her trust shattered and her heart broken. But the many ways that guy screwed up her life was a hurdle for another time. First things first: refueling her car.

  It’s just a tank of gas. Maybe I’ll go in and buy a pack of gum before I head to meet Brynn and Paul at the restaurant. Their schedules had made it impossible to set up a day for fishing yet, but it was Paul’s birthday, so they were getting together at Cappano’s, and it was nice to have plans. It also got her out of the house. She didn’t want to give Connor the impression she was always sitting around, waiting for him to show up.

  She shouldn’t want to go out with him, but after their ice cream and park hangout with Ella the other day… There was something comforting about him, even though he also scared the hell out of her. But if she managed to get through this trip to the gas station, maybe she could do one of those tours—like the swimming in an isolated mountain lake one.

  And if she imagined Connor with her—shirtless, of course—that was simply because it helped her face her demons. Keeping the image in mind, she slowed so she could turn into the gas station. Empowerment filled her. She could do this.

  A guy wearing a jacket, hood on, got out of his car. There wasn’t enough light to see him well. There weren’t enough lights at all.

  Faith slammed on the brakes. The car behind her laid on the horn. She glanced in the rearview mirror and then straightened her wheel and continued down the road. The needle on the gas gauge was nearing the danger zone, and the low fuel warning flickered on as if to spite her.

  Setbacks were common. No need to worry. She’d simply fill up on the way back.

  When it was darker.

  And later.

  Oh, hell. She might have to call Kaleb to pick her up again.

  When the waitress at Cappano’s pointed Faith to the table where her party was waiting, there were way more people than she’d expected.

  Brynn came over and hugged her. “Glad you could come.” She started going down the line, introducing people. Names kind of went in one ear and out the other, until she got to the couple at the end. “This is Wes and his fiancée, Dani.”

  Faith was sure Connor had mentioned both those names. “You wouldn’t happen to run an adventure tour business, would you?”

  Wes set down the glass he’d been drinking from. “I do, actually. Hopefully you’ve heard good things?”

  “Yeah, all good.” Since everyone was staring at her now, she felt the need to explain. “I know Connor Maguire. He’s…” She didn’t know if she should say friend of her brother, or her friend, or—

  “Here he comes right now,” Wes said, raising a hand to wave behind her.

  Faith turned, and sure enough, there he was. His dark hair was messy and he wore a black shirt with the top couple of buttons undone and the sleeves pushed up to show off his forearms. Nice but slightly casual. Perfectly Connor.

  His dark eyebrows shot up as he neared her, and a cocky smile slowly took over his surprised expression. “Blondie.” He leaned in close, his warm breath hitting her neck. “If you would just call, you wouldn’t have to follow me around. I’d give you a ride and everything.”

  “I was here first,” she whispered
, working to keep her voice steady, because she knew he’d notice, “so that makes no sense.”

  “Whatever you say.” Connor put his hand on her back, the same way he had the other day, and all her blood seemed to rush to that spot. He nodded at the people seated at the table. “Hey guys.” His gaze moved to Paul. “Happy birthday, man.”

  Wes glanced from Faith to Connor and his eyebrow twitched up. Connor nodded, and she wondered what that was all about. There was definitely something unspoken going on, but when she looked at Connor to get a read on him, he just pulled out one of the two empty chairs at the table and gestured for her to sit.

  Faith glanced at Brynn as she settled into the chair. “How do you know Connor?”

  “Wes and Dani were going to set us up, actually.” Brynn glanced at Sawyer, who was seated on her other side, and smiled. “But then Sawyer and I got together,” she said, and he lifted their entwined hands and kissed the back of hers. “And Paul met him through Wes. They all go fishing and do those tours in the helicopter.”

  Of course they did. All part of the small town curse and charm. Here she thought she’d get a break from Mister Serve and Render Speechless tonight, and instead he was draping his arm over her chair, his familiar cologne invading her senses, making her forget that she was solely on the lookout for humble guys now.

  Paul explained to his fiancée, Carly, about how his family used to spend time fishing and barbecuing with Faith’s family. Faith tensed, waiting for her or someone else to ask why they stopped, but the waiter came, and she breathed a sigh of relief.

  After that, it was a blur of ordering and multiple conversations. Everyone was coupled but her and Connor, which made her a little glad she wasn’t the only single person, even if Connor was the other. Halfway through the meal, Connor brushed his fingertips over the back of the hand she had under the table. She glanced at him and one corner of his mouth turned up. Her pulse sped up as he slowly covered her hand and laced his fingers with hers.