Rip It

by A. D. Herrick

  Allie practiced her smile and wave until her cheeks hurt, which took all of about fifteen minutes. Certain that she had successfully pulled off the task she was ready to take on the next highlighted point. She massaged her cheekbones with the pads of fingers and turned back to the computer in her lap, she read the second tip out loud. “Be yourself.” She balked at the screen in front of her adversely, her hands shooting up in the air defiantly. “Be myself? Who in the fluff butter else am I supposed to be?” Bewildered she rolled her eyes and shook her head before moving on to the next tip. Her finger pulling on the track pad of her laptop, bring up the next highlighted point. “Be Mature.” Rolling her eyes again she skipped down to the following tip, her finger daftly working the pad on the laptop.

  “Manners… this is lame.” She huffed out and skipped past the etiquette rules on to the next section on the website. “Try to have a social life.” Aggravated she roughly shoved the computer off her lap, causing it to hit the floor with a thud. Throwing her head back against the sofa she let out a scream. “Why is this so ping pong hard? Nothing in here tells me anything. Smile, be nice and have a social life? What do I say to people? How do I act? I need details people. Details!” She screamed to the ceiling angrily, her voice shrill. The television and lights flickered on and off adding to her ardent outburst. This has been happening a lot recently. Every time her emotions got the better of her, the power would flicker.

  Allie closed her eyes and tried to focus on her breathing, deeply inhaling through her nose, exhaling through her mouth, just like she had seen on television. Her temper had been getting worse and worse over the past few months, causing her skin to heat up, it felt like she were burning alive from the inside, energy crackling just beneath her skin like she were being electrocuted. The scent of cinnamon began to fill her nostrils.

  The littlest things set her off any more. Horns honking, grocery shopping and random smells are just a few of the recent triggers. All of which causing the same reaction, forcing her to remain indoors as much as possible to avoid any triggers that would draw attention to her. Calming herself down was the only way to make the pain dissipate.

  Hoping to find a hobby to expend all of her pent up energy had been a bust so far. She didn’t have the patients to go through all of the steps in learning any new skills or hobbies, her frustration getting the better of her every time. She just wanted to think it and it be done or find somewhere to place all of this sizzling energy that prickled just beneath her skin, reminding her to keep her temper in check. Sam had no answers, he was just as lost and confused as she was and Cassandra plain refused to be bothered with either of them, opting to spend her days sunbathing in silence.

  Allie continued her breathing exercise. Inhaling slowly and deeply through her nose. One. Two. Three. Exhale. The smell of cinnamon began to dissipate. Inhale. One. Two. Three. Exhale. The pain began to fade. She continued her steady breathing until her flesh no longer felt as though it were burning, though she remained warm. She did not have the patience to continue the breathing exercises any longer. She needed to get moving.

  Unfortunately she was on her own to figure out a solution to her problem. Being a teenager was now in the rejection pile along with the most recent ideas, duct tape art, fork bending, snail racing, and watching paint dry. Watching paint dry was the absolute worst. Having heard someone mention it while she was walking the strip downtown, she decided to give it a try. She had lasted a whole thirty seven seconds before huffing and stomping off, causing the power to go out momentarily. Thirty seven seconds of her life wasted.

  “That’s it, this is too hard. I don’t need a hobby. I need to get out of here.” Allie stood up and walked across the living room and into the kitchen. Clanging the cabinet doors open and closed she let out frustrated groan. “We have no food. How in Tutwiler do we have no food?” she slammed the cabinet door with a loud bang, causing the dishes inside it to rattle.

  Feeling the tension building inside her again, she decided to go out. Hoping to find something to help her relax, everything about being inside was just irritating her. Her quest to become a teenage girl had failed epically and there was no food in the house. She could not stand to be in the house with any further disappointment. She needed to escape.

  Allie stomped to the front door like a petulant child. Slipping on a pair of sneakers, she headed out in search of a distraction from this madness within her. Huffing she shoved her hands in the front pockets of her jeans and took of walking down the sidewalk, her feet leading the way. The sunshine warmed her face despite the brisk temperatures. She could smell rain in the air. It probably wouldn’t rain for another day but she could smell the sweet promise as if it were about to start any moment.

  How she loved rainy days. She loved to sit out on the back patio and watch as the rain drops pelted the earth. She loved the smell of the rain and how all of the plants seemed to come alive as they were splattered with the drops, releasing their sweet aromatic fragrances into the air. She loved to walk across their tiny yard barefoot, the mud squishing up between her toes. Every step released the sweet earthy smells of mud and fresh grass. She would roll around in the fragrance if she wasn’t so worried about the mess she would make.

  She did that once, the first time she saw rain and experienced the euphoric high of the earth coming alive in a rain storm. She rolled around in the mud laden earth, covering herself with the heady mixture of grass and dirt. Her heart soaring with every moment she spent out there. The warm tingling energy that wrapped around her was comforting and made her heart swell. She could have sworn she seen her skin glow under the cover of the mud. A lite hum of light the caressed and soothed her soul.

  When she had finally decided to come in, it had taken her days to get all of the dirt and grass scrubbed from her hair and from under her nails and about as long to get the house finally cleaned. She hadn’t seen her skin glow again since, a part of her missed it. As much as she loved rolling around in the rain she did not love cleaning up. Cleaning up was probably one of the worst possible things she could ever imagine doing.

  She stopped walking abruptly, pulling herself from her reverie, realizing she was in front of the neighborhood park. The sweet scent of the trees and grass assaulted her nostrils. It was nature in its rarest form for these parts of Detroit. The smell from the park over powered the usual smell of the downtown area, exhaust, diesel, fish, and fry grease. She inhaled deeply savoring the scent. She could almost taste it on her tongue, sweet as molasses with a twinge of citrus. She had never been to the park before.

  The thought of sticky children running around screaming with their faces covered in snot had always turned her stomach. She couldn’t even bare to watch it on the television. But today something inside her called her in that direction. It wasn’t a voice or a thought. It was more of a sense of directional guidance. She closed her eyes and inhaled deeply, allowing the scent to caress her senses. Here goes nothing. Opening her eyes she stepped on to the path that would lead her into the park.

  The park was a beautiful preserve that sat at the end of her street, surrounded by red and white cedars and maple trees with low growing shrubs speckled throughout, an oasis in the downtown Detroit neighborhood she lived in. A small play ground was set in the corner leaving an open field for children to play ball, fly kites, and roll around.

  A walking trail circled around the park, lined with trees, plaques and statues. The crisp fall air had painted the trees in bright reds, oranges and yellows that stood proudly against the bright blue sky. It was picturesque and serene. Allie’s senses urged her forward, her feet moving on their own accord as her eyes scanned the area, taking in all of the natural beauty.

  Breathing in a calming breath she began walking along the trail circling the park. The world fading away with each step, she was transported into a whole other plane. All of the pent up energy, the frustration and irritation vanished, leaving her calm and tranquil as she walked. The change in atmosphere and in her body was s
o sudden Allie had not noticed when it occurred. Only that it happened. A warm buzz sizzled along her skin. Much different than the energy she had felt before. Where that energy burned angrily this energy warmed like a soothing balm. Where that energy crackled with electricity almost shocking her, this new energy seemed to build and wrap around her like a comforting blanket, akin to how she felt that day rolling around on the ground in the rain. Oh she loved how it felt. Her lips pulled up in the corners involuntarily as she walked through the park.

  She admired the statues created by local artist, how they fit in perfectly with the natural beauty of the park. Natural elements had been drawn together to create beautiful masterpieces. Stone carved into men, women and children. Molten metals poured into gears and contemporary designs. The plaques describing historical events and honoring the different people of the city created a feeling of longing inside of her to flicker. A longing for what she didn’t know, for there was no one in her life but Cassandra and Sam. She shoved the feeling away to the back of her brain to analyze later. Allie had never felt so relaxed before and did not want to waste this moment on any negative thoughts or emotions.

  Allie’s stomach began to grumble. She had walked circles around the park for hours and had completely forgotten about her quest for food. The sun had begun to set taking its warmth with it. The park, though it radiated comfort, did little to calm her roaring stomach and the protest it put up in its quest for substance.

  Allie decided she should go back home and see what she could scavenge up. Surely there had to be something in the fridge at home worth eating. It was getting late so she forced her feet to obey and lead her home. Away from the tranquility of the park and its delicious earthy smells.

  Chapter Two

  “What are you eating?” Sam cried in disgust, staring at the disaster that sat in Allie’s hands. It looked like she had slathered ketchup between crisp brown bricks. Allie sat down her food on the plate in front of her. “It’s a sandwich.” She said defiantly, her eyebrow arching, daring him to challenge her. Sam just shook his head. “Al, we do not have stuff to make sandwiches. What are you eating?” Allie placed her hands on her hips and narrowed her eyes at Sam. “It’s a sandwich. I made it myself.”

  Sam’s lip curled in disgust. “How did you make a sandwich, Al?” Allie threw her arms out to her side, with her right hand she gestured toward the stove and the mess on top of it. A white substance coated the stove in a thick coat of powder. A pan with brown bricks sat atop the snowy mess. The countertop behind her was also coated in the powdery substance. The adjacent wall had also suffered in the battle. Looking down at the floor, Sam could see Allie’s footprints imbedded in the power that had spilled over onto the floor and a trail of footprints leading to kitchen table in which Allie sat.

  Allie had streaks of white through her dark brown locks and power on her nose and forehead. Her shirt looked as though it had taken the brunt of the mix. Sam let out a deep throaty chuckle and shook his head. “Allie, how did you make a sandwich?” He asked between fits of laughter. “I mixed flour and water, made it into loafs and I baked it. Tada… Bread. Then I smothered it in Ketchup.” Sam’s whole body shook.

  “Allie, that is disgusting. Why didn’t you just go to the store? And where did you learn to make bread?” Allie huffed and ran her hands through her hair in exasperation. “I watched the television and saw the lady make bread. I didn’t have everything she had. But I used what I did have and it turned out delicious, and you know why I didn’t go to the store. Why don’t you go to the store?” Sam sobered and glared at her. “You know why I can’t go to the store.” Allie’s upper lip pulled up as she smirked back at him. “No, I don’t.” She feigned innocence.

  Sam huffed in frustration. “People will stare at me.” Allie pulled a face. “Sam, people stare at me every time I go, but I do it, don’t I?” Sam stalked over to her, now standing inches from her face. “No, Al, if you did, we would have food. But we don’t.” Allie threw a glare at Sam before picking up her sandwich and continuing to eat. Humming as she chewed.

  “I’m not going to the store.” Sam said defiantly, slowly stepping back from her. Allie shrugged her shoulders and finished her sandwich.

  Allie took her plate to the sink and came back to the table to sit down across from Sam. Feeling confused about everything going on in her life, she knew she needed to get answers. “Sam, do you know why we are here?” Sam’s head dropped in defeat, the fight leaving him in an instant. “No, Al, I don’t.” Allie stared at Sam thoughtfully, letting his words settle. “Do you know where we came from?” Sam shook his head again, slowly. “No, Al. I’m sorry. We have been over this before.” Allie breathed in a long slow breath. “I know we have. Do you think Cass knows?” Sam tilted his head up at her in thought. “If she does, she isn’t saying.” Allie nodded her head slowly in agreeance. Cassandra doesn’t say much of anything. The two of them sat alone in silence, both absorbing the information they already knew, which was a whole lot of nothing.

  “Where did you go today?” Sam asked curiously. “I went to the park.” A smile split her face in two as she bit into her lower lip in a failed attempt to keep her smile from growing wider. “But I thought you hated the park.” Sam said, perplexed by her answer. Hi lip curling up at the thought of sticky children. Allie threw her hands wide laughing. “I know, I thought so too. But today I had just gotten so upset that I had to get out of here. So I went out walking and next thing I know I was at the park. Sam it felt so good to be walking around out there. All the trees and the grass - It was amazing. I felt so…light… like I belonged. I was so happy there.” She exclaimed merrily, her words coming out in a rush.

  “So your attempt at being a teenager failed?” Allie quickly held up her hand to silence him. “Please, do not remind me.” Sam laughed. “Al, you have got to quit watching that television. I don’t think that people living in a box are going to be able to tell you how to be happy.” Allie swished her lips from side to side. “You’re probably right. I can never get them to talk to me. They are always talking to each other. Unless they are trying to sell me something. I don’t think they want me around.” Sam quirked his head. “So why do you have the television on if they are not talking to you?” Allie shrugged. “I was just hoping they could give me answers.” Sam’s head bobbed in understanding. They had been there for eighty-three moons and they were still no closer to figuring out where ‘here’ was or why. They knew that they were in Detroit and they knew they came together. But that was the extent of their knowledge.

  Though they learned new things about the world they lived in and where they were every day, they were still no closer to the answers they so desperately needed, the important ones. Who were they? Why were they here? How did they get here? Where did they come from? Instead they learned things like how to use a microwave, how to use the internet, and how to shop online. They had improved their knowledge but never in the ways they wanted or needed.

  “Sam, how did you know my name?” Sam tilted his head in thought. “I don’t know Al. It was like… I just knew. How did you know mine?” Allie studied Sam’s face, searching her mind for the answer. “I guess it’s the same way. I just knew. It was like all of a sudden we were all here, in the kitchen. The three of us and I knew yours and Cassandra’s name as well as my own. But that was all I knew. When I try and think too hard about all the missing information my head starts to hurt. It’s a sharp pain that grows more and more painful until I stop. Then the pain vanishes.” Sam rubbed his cheek against hers. “The same thing happens to me too.”

  Allie stroked Sam’s head as he rubbed his cheek against hers. “We will figure this all out. Don’t worry.” “I know.” Sam whispered softly. The two sat there comforting one another. Allie thought back to her trip to the park. She closed her eyes and caressed Sam’s back. The warmth of Sam’s cheek against hers comforted her. She imagined herself there in the park. The sweet smell of the trees, the breeze caressing her skin, the way the sunl
ight trickled through the canopy of leaves casting shadows on the ground, the warm buzzing energy wrapping around her. A smile played along her lips.

  “What are you doing?” Cassandra shouted startling both Sam and Allie. “Nothing.” They said in unison, jumping apart as though they had been caught doing something they shouldn’t, fueling Cassandra’s suspicion. “No, you’re doing something. I saw you. What are you both doing?” Both of their heads tilted. They studied Cassandra. She stood in front of them looking up at them with slanted doubtful eyes. “We were just talking, Cass.” Allie said shocked by Cassandra’s outburst. Cassandra had not spoken more than a handful of words since they had arrived. Her usual vocabulary was no more that “yes”, “No”, or “I don’t know”.

  Cassandra shook her head. “You were flashy.” Cassandra said defiantly. Her face scrunched up like she was trying to pull the memory back to focus. “What do you mean, flashy?” Sam asked intrigued, his eyes growing wide. “I don’t know. Like flashy. Like you’re here then you fade then you’re here and you fade. You were flashy.” Cassandra tried to explain.

  Allie and Sam looked at one another confused. “Honestly Cass, I have no idea what you’re talking about. We were just sitting here talking.” Cassandra jumped on to the table, landing in front of them. She walked the length of the table cautiously, back and forth, her tail swishing side to side and her nose pointed toward the sky as she sniffed. “What were you both talking about?” Cass asked. Sniffing the air around them, searching for something, she didn’t know what exactly. “We were talking about how we showed up here and how we knew what we knew but don’t know how.