by Ivy James
“Darcy, I was, honest. But I’ve been thinking about that a lot and I’ve decided you can’t expect me to pitch in and take care of your problems.”
Take care of her problems? “Mom, please. Don’t do this. I only asked you to help until I could get back on my feet. Until I can find a job and an apartment. Day care I can trust. I make good money, it won’t take long.”
“You don’t know that. We’re not the big city here and it could take a while before you find something. Which made me think—Darcy, you’re plenty old enough to handle things on your own.”
“But right after the baby is born—”
“You’ll do fine. Why, women used to have babies and go out into the fields to work. Some still do. Having a baby is nothing these days. I’m sorry, honey, but I’ve changed my mind.”
“Mom, you said you would help me. You promised. I packed up and moved.”
“Don’t take that tone with me. Beggars are beggars and I’ve got enough stacked against me without you being here with a squalling brat and—Look, don’t take this personal and get all upset like you always do, but I never told Arnie I had a daughter, much less that I’m going to be a grand- mother, and I’m certainly not going to tell him now that we’re married.”
Hurt cut deep. She’d always known her mother lacked maternal warmth and depth, but to pretend she didn’t even exist?
“Arnie’s a bit younger than me, but we get along fine. If you come home and move in, well, I don’t think a new marriage should have that much stress.”
A bit younger? “How old is he?”
“Now, Darcy—”
“How old, Mom?”
“Twenty-eight.”
Her mouth dropped. “He’s only three years older than me?”
“Now do you understand? You’ll do fine on your own, you always have. See if the daddy’ll pay you to keep the baby away from him. Maybe then you could hire a nurse or something if you need one right after.”
Keep the baby away. Like her mother wanted her to stay away. “I don’t want Stephen’s money. I never did.”
Her mother snorted. “If you had his money now, you wouldn’t be in this mess, would you? Darcy, I don’t want to fight. As soon as you get your car fixed, you let me know where you wind up. Send me a picture of the baby at work. Not at home, okay? Don’t forget and mess this up for me. I’ve got a good thing this time. Oh, I hear Arnie pulling in. Don’t be mad, baby. Mama loves you.”
The phone clicked in her ear. Darcy flipped the cell phone closed and tossed it aside. Then grabbed the doll she’d set on the bedside table and flung it to the floor. Glaring at its twisted appearance, she laid gentle hands on her stomach. “Mama loves you,” she whispered, hugging her baby. A knot formed in her throat, too big to wish away.
Using her toe, she rolled the doll over so she could see its face, remembering when she thought her mother had given her the doll to show her how much she loved her. What a joke. Her mother didn’t feel anything for her. “Don’t worry. I’ll protect you and take care of you, hold you when you’re scared and always help you because that’s what mommies are supposed to do. Don’t be scared, because we’re going to be all right. I’m not her. I’m not her.”
GARRET AVOIDED his brother’s suspicious expression after Darcy left the room. He’d seen a lot of pregnant women come and go at the hospital, but Darcy was surprisingly graceful, and his gaze had lingered on her a lot longer than it should’ve. If not for the mound of her stomach, she wouldn’t even look pregnant. And if she wasn’t? Would that make anything easier?
“The baby yours?”
His attention snapped to Nick. “No.”
“You sure?” Nick lowered his voice. “Because the way you’re looking at her makes it seem like a possibility.”
Garret clenched his jaw. It was one thing to have doubts about Joss and their relationship, but tossing Darcy—and her unborn child—into the mix was just insane. “I feel bad for her. She’s going through a hard time right now, and needs a friend.”
“That may be, but you weren’t looking at her like she’s a friend.”
Garret shifted in his chair. “You’re seeing things. She’s pregnant, or didn’t you notice?”
“She’s still a pretty woman. Not to mention smart and funny.” Nick smirked. “And there are ways around a pregnant belly.”
The comment sent images through his head and his body reacted in an instant. He realized then and there the baby wasn’t a problem for him. What kind of man held an innocent baby at fault for his or her conception? Darcy would’ve stuck by the baby’s dad if he’d been man enough to take on the responsibility.
“What are we talking about now?” Gram asked as she returned from the kitchen, coffeepot in hand. “Where’s Darcy?”
“She got a call on her cell. She thought it might be her mother,” Nick informed her.
“Oh, I hope so. The poor dear. She’s tried all week to act like she wasn’t worried, but I could tell she was. It’s obvious she doesn’t have the family support the two of you grew up with.” She shook her head. “The ones who have it always seem to take it for granted.”
Nick scowled at the gentle reprimand and stared at the table, a muscle ticking in his jaw.
Garret grabbed a cookie from the plate and stood, his body well under control thanks to Gram’s appearance. “I’m going to go spend some time with Matt, then check on Darcy.”
In the living room Matt had zoned out in front of the television watching a movie. Glancing over his shoulder to make sure Nick and Gram weren’t behind him, he gave Matt the cookie, then continued on down the hall toward the bedrooms. The door across from Gram’s was open, a three-inch crack allowing him to hear Darcy’s choked sobs.
His heart thudded in his chest as he approached. “Darcy?”
She snapped to attention and wiped her face with trembling hands. He crossed the room, stepping over an expensive-looking doll dressed in Victorian-era garb and sporting a head full of curls similar to Darcy’s. He shoved the cell phone aside to sit on the bed beside her, pulling her against his chest and ignoring her stiff posture.
“Shh.” He pressed a kiss to her hair, rubbed his hands up and down her back. “Whatever it is, it’ll be fine. Remember what Dr. Clyde said. You don’t want to upset Spike, right?”
A muffled noise escaped her—a laugh?—before she buried her face deeper. The scent of her hair reminded him of orange groves and flowers, the feel of it soft in his hands. “What happened? Tell me, sweetheart.” Her voice emerged muffled against his chest and he couldn’t make out her words. “What?”
“She got married. To husband number f-four. She was in Vegas and that’s why she d-didn’t call me back.” Her fingers gripped his shirt, the ragged sound of her voice tearing at his insides. “She promised me. She said she’d help with the baby and let me stay with her while I got on my feet. She promised.”
He cursed the woman who’d treat her daughter this way. Darcy was on her own? Completely? What kind of person did that? What kind of mother?
“He doesn’t even know we exist. She didn’t tell him because she doesn’t want us. Doesn’t want me. She never did.”
Biting back a curse, he pressed a kiss to her temple and cradled her closer, Gram’s comment about family support repeating in his head. “Darcy—”
“It was stupid of me.”
“What was, sweetheart?”
“Believing in her. I knew better. I know better. All my life she’s tossed me aside any time a man came around. Why did I think she’d put us first now? Why did I think I could depend on her?”
Because she saw the good in people, not the bad. That insight into Darcy’s personality came easily. She’d had a rough childhood from the sound of it, but Darcy still believed in the good. He gently wiped away the tears. “You’ll be okay. You’re not alone, Darcy.” Her gaze shifted to the doll lying on the floor and he wondered at the connection. He bent and picked it up. “Who’s this?”
Darcy gl
ared at the doll but made no move to take her from him. “Miss Potts. My mom gave her to me when I was little.”
“Looks like you’ve taken good care of her.” Whether she’d thrown the fragile, expensive-looking doll or it fell off the bed, it was no worse for wear. Darcy on the other hand…
“Now you know why I didn’t say much when we talked about family. My family isn’t like yours.”
Darcy’s lashes were spiky, her nose red, but she was beautiful, her eyes liquid pools of glazed brown. Her full mouth turned down at the corners, trembling. He wanted to press a kiss there to still them, wanted to make her smile. Do something to ease the pain she was feeling.
“She gave me the doll for my birthday.” A rough laugh escaped her chest, thick and throaty. “We didn’t have a lot of money and I’d begged for Miss Potts forever. Mom always said no.”
He didn’t like the tone she used. “What happened?”
“I came home from school and let myself into the house. But hours passed and she didn’t come home. Not until my birthday the next day. Then there she was, all smiles and apologies. She admitted she’d forgotten to call someone to come watch me because she was…having too much fun partying with a guy. I wouldn’t have wanted her to stop having a good time, would I?”
Dear God. How could someone be so reckless? So uncaring about their own flesh and blood? “How old were you?”
“Eight.” A bitter smile flashed. “A self-sufficient eight. There was food in the house. Cereal and juice. I didn’t starve and I was okay, but—I was alone. My mom…she had a lot of boyfriends. She made it easy for them. Anyway, I was afraid if they knew I was there alone, if I left the lights on…I kept a flashlight on under the blankets. Then there she was, carrying the stupid doll like it made up for what she’d done. She said it was to keep me company next time because obviously I was a big girl and didn’t need to be watched.”
He rested his chin on her head, holding her close because he couldn’t make himself let go. “She didn’t know what a treasure she had.”
Darcy inhaled raggedly. “I’m the gatekeeper in my family, Garret. The one who always took care of her when the guys dumped her and moved on. She said it was my fault because they didn’t want another man’s kid.”
“Not all men are like that.” He wasn’t.
“I knew I had to get out of there. If I didn’t get away from her I’d never be my own person. I couldn’t deal with her life and have the one I wanted for myself. It was hard to break ties, but I did it. I went to school, moved wherever the job paid best. Then I found out I was pregnant and I didn’t want my baby to be completely alone. I thought my mom had changed. She said she had. It just makes me so angry.” Her hand fisted in his shirt. “I believed her.”
“You wanted your baby to know its grandmother. You left the father because he didn’t deserve you or Spike. Those are good traits, Darcy, not bad. You’re fighting to do what’s right, and no one can fault that.”
She sniffled, a husky chuckle emerging from her throat. “Another pep talk. You need to charge for those. Oh, look at you.” She plucked at his tear-soaked shirt. “I’m sorry for crying all over you. You poor guy, it’s hard being my friend, isn’t it?”
Chapter 17
“NOT AT ALL.” Garret tucked a curl behind her ear. “I like being your friend.”
“Thank you. Me, too.” She blinked rapidly. “You’re a good man, Garret.”
“Sweetheart, I don’t want to put more pressure on you, but what are you going to do now?”
She inhaled a shuddering breath. “I’m not sure, but I’ll be fine. It’s good that I have to do this on my own. I have to get used to being a single mom, and there’s nothing like jumping in with both feet, right? As soon as my car is fixed I’ll figure something out. We’ll be fine, just the two of us.”
He smoothed his hand over her hair. “I don’t doubt you will, but it’s okay to admit you need help sometimes, that you need someone to lean on. You’ve got that in me, okay?”
“Do you ever feel that way?”
Maybe it was the moment, maybe it was the way she looked at him. Whatever it was, he had to answer honestly. “Yeah, I do.” He smoothed his thumb over her cheek, his gaze dropping to follow the movement. Her lips were parted, moist, and he found himself unable to look away, unable to stop the tide.
Garret lowered his head, hesitating a scant millimeter from her lips. Warnings clanged in his head, but he breathed her in, so close but not touching, not kissing. So close that with every breath, every tremble of her lips, he wanted more.
A small, muffled moan escaped her throat when he finally closed the distance and brushed her mouth with his, softly, barely a kiss at all. But his every muscle tensed at the touch, molten lava firing his veins until his whole body burned.
He sealed his lips over hers and suppressed a groan. Darcy tasted hot and sweet, like Gram’s chocolate chip cookies and tears and woman. He filled his hands with her soft curly hair, tilted her head and deepened the caress, unable to stop, each nudge of their tongues a delicious slip and glide.
“I have to say goodbye to Darcy first!” Matt’s running footsteps thundered down the hall.
Garret practically launched himself from the bed. Darcy gasped and covered her mouth with her fingertips and a scant second passed before Matt barreled into the bedroom.
“Darcy, we’re leaving.”
Darcy remained on the bed, her face blazing with color, but thankfully Matt didn’t seem to notice—or comment on Garret standing in the corner with a death grip on the dresser’s rounded edge.
“Will I see you at the gym Saturday?”
“Of course.” She cleared her throat. “Absolutely. I’ll be there, just like your dad and I discussed.”
Watching the interaction from the sidelines, Garret attempted to harness the explosion of desire and was startled when the boy threw himself at Darcy and gave her a hug. Matt was usually reserved and shy, not one for making contact. Had he ever hugged Joss?
“Will you play Alien Racers with me?”
Darcy nodded, returning the embrace. “I sure will, sweetie. You’d better practice, though, because I got really good playing it on my breaks at the hotel.”
Matt released her with a grin. “You won’t beat me.”
“Matt?” Nick appeared in the doorway.
He hadn’t heard his brother walk down the hall or else he’d have headed Nick off. One look at Darcy’s face and his brother would know.
Garret watched, the knot in his gut growing, as Nick took in the scene. Darcy on the bed, a fiery blush remaining on her cheeks, and unable to make eye contact, Garret standing as far away from Darcy as possible, as if—
They were guilty of something.
He met Nick’s gaze briefly and knew that while Nick was curious about whatever was going on—something Garret would like to know himself—his brother was the last one in the family who’d judge.
“Matt, come on, we’ve got to go. Darcy, I’ll see you Saturday.”
“Um, yes. Thanks for getting my portable table out of the car and bringing it to me. I have three appointments here over the weekend.”
Nick nodded. “You’re on a roll. You’ll earn the money in no time. I’ll pick you up about twenty to ten.”
Darcy smiled at Nick in thanks, and Garret’s gut tightened in response. He didn’t want her smiling at Nick. And he didn’t have the right to want anything where she was concerned.
“Thank you. I appreciate it.”
Garret ran a hand over his head and squeezed the muscles in his neck. Protective was sounding damn possessive.
“Matt?”
“I’m coming.” The boy shuffled off with one last wave to Darcy.
Garret stared at his feet. The ability to speak and say whatever needed to be said, the gift he’d relied on his whole life, didn’t appear. He had nothing but a truckload of guilt and self-recriminations. Emotions he couldn’t begin to name. Joss deserved better than him kissing another wom
an. Wanting another woman. He’d always despised men who strung women along, used them, uncaring of their feelings. He wasn’t like that. People expected more of him. He expected more of himself.
“It’s okay, Garret.”
He looked up to see Darcy watching him, her gaze much too astute.
“Believe me, I understand how complicated this is.”
“I didn’t mean to take advantage of your upset. That wasn’t my intent.”
A sad smile pulled at her lips. “I know. We’re both stressed and feeling…I don’t know. It’s no big deal, just a kiss.”
“You’re sure? You’re okay?”
Her chin raised, but her lashes lowered. “I’m fine.”
She didn’t look fine. She looked unhappy and dazed. And he felt like the lowest of the low because he had no right to make things worse. “I should go, too. Darcy, I’m sorry. That shouldn’t have happened.”
JOSS EMITTED a surprised shriek before clamping her hands over her mouth, staring in horror-filled shock at the sight that greeted her on the other side of her bedroom window. She’d tossed the drapes back to investigate a noise and there he was. Tobias glared at her, a hundred-eighty pounds of furious man. She glared right back. “What are you doing?”
“Open up.”
She shook her head firmly back and forth.
“Do it or I’ll go knock on the front door.”
She opened the window a scant inch. “Go away. I don’t want to talk to you.” She tried to slam the window closed, but Tobias’s hand shot out and kept that from happening. He raised the window higher, inserting one leg into her bedroom, then the other. “No, no. Get out. I said go away, not come in. I don’t want to talk to you.”
“Fine. I’ll leave.” Tobias headed toward her bedroom door.
“Stop! Wait!” She ran after him and flung herself in front of the door, glowering at him.
“Make up your mind, princess.”
“Go out through the window.”
“Not until we talk.”
“I have nothing to say to you.”