Lizzie’s Daughters

by Rosie Clarke

  ‘Yes, my little tigress,’ Pierre purred like a big cat and slid away from her, but still leaning towards her, watching her. ‘Now you begin to learn – but if you want such pleasure you must give back…’

  Betty sat up and then quickly slid out of bed, dashing for the small toilet, where she relieved herself. She filled the washbasin with cold water and splashed her face and dipped her hair, scrubbing at it with a flannel and then washing herself all over, as if to restore some kind of balance. Staring at herself in the small spotted mirror on the wall, she saw that her eyes looked dark and her face pale. In that moment Betty knew that she was still a child in many ways. Pierre wanted a woman and she hadn’t been ready for that… she was used to being spoiled, pampered and given what she wanted. She wasn’t sure whether she would ever want to do some of the things Pierre demanded from her… and yet she knew that if she didn’t he would soon tire of her and then…

  She could go back to London, throw herself on Aunt Miriam’s mercy. No one would ever have to know what had happened here. Betty thought of her money safely tucked inside her suitcase. It was her way of escape if she found life too demanding with Pierre – but he was so good at lovemaking when he set out to please her, and she was enjoying her life here. Perhaps he was right and she was just a selfish little girl – and she should learn to please him as he wanted…

  Rubbing herself dry, Betty went back to the cubbyhole that Pierre called his bedroom. To her surprise he was dressed and on the point of leaving.

  ‘Where are we going?’ she asked.

  ‘You’re staying here,’ he said in that harsh voice she’d first heard earlier. ‘Where I’m going isn’t for little girls… I’ll see you later, and if you’re good I’ll take you to the café and we’ll watch the cabaret…’

  Betty didn’t answer nor did she try to stop him. She was beginning to realise that she didn’t know him very well. She’d fallen for his charm, his good looks and his sexy voice, but she hadn’t given herself time to know him.

  As soon as she was alone, she got dressed and, taking a few francs of the money she’d changed when they first arrived, went out. She would explore Paris alone and look for the workshops that she’d heard about from some of Pierre’s friends.

  The important names of Dior, Chanel and others of equal fame wouldn’t look at a young and inexperienced girl like her, but according to Helene, one of Pierre’s many friends they met in the evenings, there were lots of small workshops making clothes and they might take on an English girl who spoke reasonable French and teach her how to cut and machine to professional standards. She could only try, because she would need to find work of some kind if she wanted to stay in Paris… Besides, there were many places in Paris she wanted to see that Pierre had no interest in showing her…and perhaps it was time she showed a little bit of independence, reminded him that she had a right to her own decisions…

  *

  ‘I may have to go away for a few days,’ Sebastian said as they sat over dinner that evening and savoured the fine wine he’d bought to accompany their meal. ‘But I’ve set things in motion, Lizzie. I’ve got people looking for her… a private detective. I didn’t want to bring the police in on this and I still don’t, because she’s a minor and I don’t want her name to get in the papers; mud always sticks and it could ruin her chances of a good life. Besides, I’ve employed an agent who has more time and resources than the police…’

  ‘Oh, Sebastian, do you have to go?’ Lizzie said, feeling hurt and angry that he could still put his business first when she needed him here – and she was hardly sleeping because she was so worried about Betty. ‘I need you here with me…’

  ‘It’s just to the factory,’ he replied frowning. ‘I’m not going abroad again just yet. I don’t think there’s a lot of sense in my visiting all the coffee houses myself, Lizzie. I’ve tried but no one has seen her – or if they have they aren’t saying. I think a private detective might have more luck…’

  ‘I suppose you’re right…’ Lizzie didn’t want another argument with her husband. He was on edge the whole time recently and she didn’t think it was just because of Betty, although she knew he was blaming himself bitterly for what had happened. ‘Is anything wrong, Sebastian? Anything you haven’t told me?’

  ‘I have a few business problems,’ he admitted and smiled wryly. ‘I’m sorry if I’ve been short with you, Lizzie darling – but I’m as anxious about Betty as you are. I could’ve done without this at the moment…’

  ‘Is there anything I can do to help you?’

  ‘No, except just trust me. I promised I’d find her, Lizzie, and I shall – but I do have other things on my mind…’ He stood up and kissed her on the brow. ‘I need to do some work, darling. You’re looking tired. No need to wait up for me. I’ll probably sleep on the sofa… .’

  Lizzie turned her head as he left the room. She carried the used dishes through to the kitchen and put them in a bowl of hot water to soak. Tonight she was just too tired to bother with washing up, and all she felt like doing was having a good cry…

  *

  ‘Why didn’t you say something before?’ Beth asked, looking at her eldest son in annoyance. ‘Lizzie and Sebastian are worried to death…’

  ‘I wasn’t sure that anything was wrong,’ Matt said. ‘Frank told me he’d seen a girl that might have been Betty at Gatwick. He’d been there on business and just caught a fleeting glance as this couple went through departures. I thought he was probably imagining it and Betty would just turn up. You know what she can be…’ He hesitated, wondering whether to tell his mother what else Frank had told him in confidence – yet what was the point? They had no proof and it would just make things worse for her parents. ‘Frank has no idea which plane they were catching – it could have been anywhere in the world, although… he thinks she might have been with a French bloke she’s been seeing at the club, if it was her…and as I keep telling you, we don’t know for sure…’

  Beth looked at her son in exasperation. He was so casual about it. Didn’t he know how serious it was?

  ‘What French bloke? Why haven’t you said anything about this? Betty is only seventeen, Matt – if she’s been getting into bad behaviour you should have given us a hint.’

  ‘I didn’t want to make things worse for her if she just turned up and said she’d been staying with a friend, but it’s been a couple of weeks now…’ Matt looked guilty. ‘I scared him off at the club and had a few words with Betty when we brought her home later – but she insisted he was just a friend and it wasn’t my business, and it isn’t, Mum. Betty is old enough to get married if she wants and…’ he faltered. ‘Look, Frank said he’ll ask around a bit, see what he can find out. He’s a good bloke and will do what he can…’

  ‘Well, I’m going round to Lizzie right now to tell her what I know – and if Sebastian comes after you, he’ll want the whole truth, Matt – not just the bits you’ve told me…I shouldn’t want to be in your shoes when he hears what you’ve just revealed…’

  Matt stared after his mother. Sebastian would probably tear him off a strip and he felt guilty now, because Frank had wanted him to tell her parents, but Matt couldn’t believe that Betty would’ve have been daft enough to go off with a man like that…

  *

  ‘You haven’t heard anything more?’ Beth asked as she sat in Lizzie’s kitchen an hour or so later. She looked concerned as Lizzie shook her head, because they were still so close that they felt each other’s sorrows. Beth was the sister Lizzie had never had and they’d shared so much during the war years, and since: the children’s illnesses, their triumphs and failures. ‘I thought she might send you a postcard or something… or even telephone you and let you know she’s all right.’

  ‘Betty was so angry when she left,’ Lizzie said. ‘I told you that she’d thrown things that Sebastian had given her at the wall and smashed them? I know she loved that glass swan; she must have really hated him to do that…’

  ‘Just for a
moment she probably did,’ Beth agreed. ‘Look, Lizzie, I don’t know for certain, but Matt thinks that his friend might have seen Betty at Gatwick with a man. He only caught a fleeting glimpse but he thought it might be her…’

  ‘Oh no! Sebastian has been hunting all over London, ringing all her friends, but I don’t know if he has checked the airports… I knew she’d taken her passport but I didn’t really think she would leave the country on her own…’

  ‘Betty is old enough in law to fly unaccompanied, Lizzie. Your daughter is a young woman, as I’ve said before, even if she seems like a child to you – and according to Matt, she’d been hanging around with a Frenchman. He came here as a student of architecture some months ago and his visa ran out last month…’

  ‘You think he might have gone back home and taken Betty with him?’ Lizzie was horrified. ‘But that means she’s probably living with him…’

  ‘Yes, I think it probably does,’ Beth agreed. ‘I know it’s a shock, love, but I wasn’t so much older when I fell in love with Mark; it happens and as long as she’s happy and being taken care of…’

  ‘I know she looks grown-up, Beth; Betty is still young in many ways,’ Lizzie said. ‘We all had to grow up fast and face the reality of life when we were young – our kids have had it easy.’

  ‘Yes, I know,’ Beth sighed. ‘Children can be so difficult, especially when there’s a stepfather involved. I told you Matt and Tony argue like crazy all the time and it has got worse just lately– Yet they went off down the pub together last night and came back the best of pals. They were laughing over something they’d seen – one of those peculiar bubble cars. Matt said he was going to get one for Tom for Christmas, but of course he wouldn’t be allowed to drive it. Even if they do look like a kid’s toy, they’re actually cars of a sort…’

  ‘I haven’t seen one yet, but they look fun. Matt was probably teasing; he’ll get him a toy one.’ Lizzie smiled, her anxiety about Betty forgotten for a moment, because there had always been a certain amount of friction between Beth’s eldest boy and his stepfather.

  ‘Jenny always adored Tony,’ Beth said now. Beth’s only daughter Jenny was married to a soldier and no longer lived in London. She’d been all over the place with her husband, living in married quarters – in Cyprus for a while, which she’d raved about in her long letters home, until all the trouble between the Turks and Greeks escalated out there, and they’d been transferred to Germany. Jenny was now pregnant for the first time and was saying that they were coming home in the autumn and would be based near Aldershot and would probably stay with her mother around the time of the birth, especially if her husband was away on manoeuvres. ‘Tony wasn’t keen on her getting married at seventeen, but she cried and he gave in, of course – and it’s worked out well. She’s really happy…’ Beth saw the pain in Lizzie’s eyes. ‘I wish it could be the same for Betty…’

  ‘We don’t know she isn’t happy,’ Lizzie said, determined to be brave and not give way to despair. ‘Sebastian has been telephoning round her friends, trying to find out where she might have gone – if there was anyone she might have arranged to stay with, but so far he’s drawn a blank.’

  ‘Tell him to talk to Matt,’ Beth said. ‘I think he knows more about this man than he’s telling me and he doesn’t like him…’

  ‘What is his name, where did he come from?’

  ‘I don’t know. Matt only told me today…’

  Lizzie felt a cold trickle of fear down her spine. ‘If we knew who he was we might be able to find him – and if Betty is with him…’

  ‘Matt will want to help as much as he can. He’s always been fond of Betty, as you know…’

  Lizzie nodded. Betty and Beth’s twins, Matt and Jenny, had been brought up almost as brother and sisters during the war and she’d known Matt kept a brotherly eye on her daughter.

  ‘I’d noticed that Betty was doing things to her hair and wearing make-up more often, but that didn’t worry me. I was determined I wouldn’t try to stop her growing up the way my aunt did me…’

  ‘Betty has Harry’s reckless nature. And you’re one of the most stubborn people I know, Lizzie. You can’t blame Betty for being the way she is… and she’s nearly eighteen. A lot of girls are married by that age…’

  ‘If she was here and we could help her it wouldn’t be so bad but she’s too young to be off on her own somewhere, Beth. She’s still an innocent – a child embarking on life. She should be here where we can all look after her…’

  ‘Some girls grow up sooner and perhaps she met a man she thought she loved… ’

  ‘Oh Beth,’ Lizzie said, her distress almost overwhelming her. ‘I’ve hardly slept since she went. I can’t stop thinking about where she is and if she’s safe…’

  ‘Of course you can’t,’ Beth said sympathetically. ‘I can’t believe Sebastian actually hit her. He’s never struck you – has he?’

  ‘Never!’ Lizzie shook her head emphatically. ‘He’s never hit either of the girls before. I know he regrets it dreadfully. He was upset about something that day – and since then he’s like a bear with a sore head. He’s blaming himself for her going off like that and he’s out all hours trying to find her. I don’t sleep but he hardly comes to bed at all… and he doesn’t eat much either. I’ve tried telling him it isn’t his fault, but he knows it is…’

  ‘I always thought Betty adored him, Lizzie…’

  ‘I think that’s the trouble. She did and he made such a fuss of her when she was little – and then I got pregnant with Francie. Sebastian says he loves them both equally, but how can he? Betty isn’t easy. She’s got a temper and she acts without thinking, says things she shouldn’t – and Sebastian tries to keep her right, but he’s away so often and perhaps he’s lost touch with her… perhaps neither of us realised that she needed to move on in her life.’

  Beth wrinkled her brow. ‘Do you think she’s jealous of Francie – of her talent, and because Sebastian is her father?’

  ‘Matt and Jenny aren’t jealous of Tom, are they?’

  ‘They spoil him silly,’ Beth assured her. ‘When he was born they hardly ever let me do a thing for him… Jenny was a little mother to him and as soon as he could walk and talk, Matt took him over. Tony and I hardly got a look in…’ Beth laughed because she was in a good place and knew she was lucky. The dark days when she’d given birth to illegitimate twins after their father’s ship was sunk and the even blacker days when she’d been married to Bernie Wright for a brief time were far behind her. Then she’d married Tony after he was badly wounded and sent home from the war and she’d never been happier. Tony’s little shop had become three thriving businesses, selling sweets, cigarettes, tobacco and newspapers. His false arm had gradually become a useful tool, even though he was always conscious of it, but it didn’t stop him becoming a successful man – or a loving husband. ‘I’ve been really lucky, Lizzie. We both have – but I know some things could have gone better for you, love…’

  They both understood that she was talking about the unfortunate miscarriages that Lizzie had endured. She’d visited several doctors and in the end been advised to take precautions so that she did not fall pregnant again.

  Her doctor had told her, ‘If you continue to miscarry, Mrs Winters, you could seriously endanger your own health. You have two lovely daughters – why not settle for that? I can make it quite easy for you…’

  ‘I don’t want a hysterectomy,’ Lizzie had said, fearing that he would ask her to have an operation to make certain she could not fall for a child again.

  He’d smiled kindly at her. ‘I wouldn’t dream of suggesting it. Perhaps one day you might have the son you so desire, but you need to heal inside and get strong again.’

  He’d given Lizzie a cap that fitted inside her and which was very easy and discreet to use. It had caused her no trouble and been successful in preventing her falling for another child… but she’d torn it accidentally and thrown it out some while back, neglecting to have a ne
w one fitted. Sebastian would scold her if he knew and tell her to go back to the doctor to have a new one fitted – but Lizzie didn’t want that: she wanted one last chance to give her husband the son she knew he craved, even though he’d never put it into words.

  ‘Oh, I’m over all that now,’ Lizzie told Beth, because she wasn’t ready to tell her or anyone else something she couldn’t quite believe herself. It was much too soon and she couldn’t be sure that she’d fallen for a baby again. ‘I’m going to see Ed this afternoon. Would you like to come and see the new machinery we’ve installed in the workshops?’

  Beth gave her an odd look, as if she’d guessed that Lizzie had deliberately turned the conversation, but she got up and retrieved her shopping bag from the back of a chair. ‘I’d better get home,’ she said. ‘Tony has a dinner on this evening – a businessmen’s thing, Chamber of Commerce annual shindig, and he wants me to go with him, though he knows I hate them. I’ve got an appointment at three to have my hair done… and I’ve no idea what I’m going to wear…’

  *

  ‘You’d better tell me everything,’ Sebastian said grimly when he and Matt met in the public bar the younger man had suggested. ‘You know more than you told your mother – don’t deny it…’

  ‘I couldn’t tell her what Frank told me,’ Matt agreed. ‘I didn’t want her or Betty’s mother to worry too much until we know a bit more – but this chap Betty may have gone off with is a nasty character by all accounts…’

  ‘In what way?’

  ‘The general opinion is that he’s a bit of a lothario, getting girls into trouble and then dropping them – that’s one rumour, but Frank’s made inquiries at the college Saint-Jacquez was attending and they asked him to leave before his course was finished. He’d been gambling heavily at some club and they sent the heavies in after him, causing a rumpus at the college campus…’