Soul of Smoke

by Caitlyn McFarland

  Kai froze. After a few long minutes, she stroked his hair. It hurt so much, wanting to comfort and be comforted, but being so angry, so afraid of letting him in. Still, with him close, something desperate inside her eased. When he would have moved, she held onto him, and he laid his head in her lap. They stayed like that for an hour or more, until his bruises faded into nothing and skyscrapers peeked over the omnipresent trees. Then the city was all around them, the buildings so tall Kai had to lean her head against her window and crane her neck, and still she couldn’t see their tops. Rhys didn’t move until Evan pulled up behind a pair of ritzy-looking towers and Evan parked the SUV.

  Rhys sat up, but his hand lingered on hers. “I’m sorry,” he murmured again before letting her go. Then, “Kai... don’t say anything about our heartswearing. Not yet.”

  Before she could ask why, he climbed out and went to help the others. Tane, Evan and a tall East Asian man carried Griffith’s body into the building. Rhys scooped Ffion into his arms and followed them.

  The sight broke her heart. Still, Kai couldn’t bring herself to let him into her mind.

  * * *

  Blood clouded the water. Juli dipped the rag again and wrung it out, watching the pink liquid stream back into the bowl. Plink, plink. The water rippled again when her tears hit the surface. Tightening her jaw, she turned back to Ashem, who was seated on a plush gray chair draped with towels.

  The apartment was luxurious, all white walls and dark hardwood floors and decidedly boring after days in a dragon’s lair. Though she’d been in the cave just over a week, Juli felt a sharp ache for the hoard and tiny fires and singing walls. After retrieving what they could, they’d destroyed it rather than leaving anything behind for Owain. A home a thousand years in the making, gone. Like Griffith. Juli thought she might drown in the guilt, and it wasn’t even hers.

  Firelight from the gas fireplace flickered across Ashem’s bronze skin, warming the cool white and gray of the room and turning the remaining blood to ugly black streaks and splotches. She’d sponged off the worst of the mess, but it still covered at least half of his claw-marked body. Angry red welts and lines of dark sutures ran parallel from his chest to his lower abdomen, already almost healed. They’d had to use some kind of discreet dragon back entrance to get him, Ffion and Griffith’s body into the building without causing a scene.

  At least Ashem would survive.

  “Thanks to you, aziz-am.”

  “Shush.”

  She’d darted from tree to tree as he fought, staying as close as possible without being seen, trying to slip into the mind of whichever dragon he fought. Making them slow, distracting them. And Kavar...Juli flung the rag back into the bowl, and blood-tinged water slopped over the edge onto the mahogany table.

  “We survived.” Ashem’s velvet voice startled her out of her thoughts. She caught a flash of devastating grief. “Most of us.”

  “You were lucky,” Juli snapped. “He would’ve killed you, you idiot! I don’t care if he’s your brother, you can’t—” She took a shallow breath. She’d been inside Ashem’s head during the fight. He could have killed Kavar so many times, but he hadn’t. Instead, Kavar had nearly killed him. “You can’t—” Another shallow breath, then another, faster and faster until the room spun and tilted.

  Ashem’s mind surrounded her, steadying hers, and he rose and put his arms around her. They realized simultaneously how well she fit there.

  Another surge of guilt from Ashem. “You would have made an excellent doctor.”

  Juli snorted, but calmed, timing her breathing to the measured beat of his heart. “Clearly not. I panicked.”

  “Only for a minute. You were perfect.” His fingers feathered down her back. “And I failed.”

  “I did a horrible job with the stitches. You’ll be covered in scars.” She twined her arms around his neck and stroked the short, soft hair at his nape. “Stop it. It’s not your fault.”

  He didn’t respond to her thought, only veiled his more in shadow. “I can make a salve. You won’t notice the scars in a week.”

  Juli snorted. “Scars are the least of our worries. Kai might want some, though. The one on her arm will be bad.” She pushed him away. “You’re getting blood all over me.”

  “You were covered in it already.”

  Juli drew away from him and looked down. This morning her shirt had been cream and sky blue. Now it was mostly splotches of brown and bright red, as were her arms. Even her hair had sticky spots in it. Perhaps Ashem wasn’t the only reason they’d had to sneak in the back.

  “I’ll clean up when I’m done with you.” She wet a new rag and wrung it out. It was stained red already.

  She threw her hands up in frustration. “This water is disgusting.” Of all the ridiculous things, tears burned behind her eyes. Why on earth should she cry? She hadn’t been hurt. They had lost Griffith, but it wasn’t like Juli had known him well. Kai would live. Juli would live. Ashem...

  She moved to pick up the bowl, but he wrapped his hand around her wrist. She glared over her shoulder.

  He scowled. “You need rest.”

  “Sit down.”

  Ashem sat, but didn’t release her wrist. He wrestled the bowl from her hand and yanked her onto his lap, letting out a muffled grunt of pain.

  “I beg your pardon! I hope that hurt!” She struggled into a sitting position, and served him right if she elbowed him somewhere tender. Served him right for being so stupid and so almost-dead after swearing her and not even giving her a chance to know him—

  “Damn it, woman! Don’t blame me. I still have to do my job. I didn’t expect—”

  Juli struggled again. “You didn’t expect? Ha! Let me go! I don’t even care! Go ahead, go fight battles and die! I’m strong enough to get on without you!”

  But the image of Ffion curled next to Griffith’s body flashed through Juli’s mind. She pressed her hand against her mouth and stifled a sob.

  He gripped the back of her neck with one hand, stilling her, and leaned his forehead against hers. His mind opened. Anger. Guilt. Relief. Desire. Fear. The fear was the strongest, swirling over everything else. A knee-knocking kind of fear Juli had only felt once, after some drunken idiot had driven her off the road and she’d wrapped her car around a tree. It was seeing death and surviving.

  Ashem hadn’t feared his own death. He had been afraid for her.

  “You are strong enough, jāné del-am. Not me.”

  Juli grasped his shoulders, holding on. His forehead still rested on hers, downcast eyes hidden by thick, dark lashes. But she felt what he was feeling. Embarrassed by his emotions, afraid of rejection...and Ancients, it felt good to hold her, to feel her safe. Her skin was like sun-warmed silk. He wanted...

  Juli’s cheeks grew warm. “Stop. This...what we’re feeling, it’s the magic, or whatever silly thing you want to call it. It’s not real.”

  “What is real?” He lifted golden eyes to her face. “I would have chosen you.”

  Juli swallowed. “You don’t even—”

  He kissed her.

  She hadn’t seen it coming, this soft, dark kiss. She melted into it, allowing the scant mental barriers she’d built to slip. She let him experience what she’d felt that hellish hour he’d been in the sky. The desperation and terror, the need for him to survive. His grip on her tightened, and the kiss intensified. They broke apart, took a shuddering breath.

  “Perhaps we can learn t
o live with each other, Juliet King.”

  “Perhaps. If you ever get all the blood off of you.”

  He raised his eyebrows. “As we’ve established, I’m not the only one covered in blood.”

  She had an involuntary longing for a hot shower. A long, thorough, steaming shower...

  The gold in Ashem’s eyes deepened. When he spoke, his voice was gruff. “Go. You’ll feel better.”

  She touched his cheek. “I don’t want to go alone.”

  He made a strangled sound then scooped her up in his arms and strode toward the bathroom door. She opened her mouth to complain about him ripping out his stitches, but he silenced her with a kiss.

  * * *

  Kai balled her fists on her knees, staring at her upturned forearm. A long, angry scar puckered the skin of her right arm. Her sleeve hid the opalescent scales that swirled over the left.

  I’ll never be able to wear short sleeves again.

  She tensed and relaxed her fists, trying not to squirm on the plush, white couch. After a week among the organic, unpredictable shapes of the cave, the elegant, modern lines of the furniture and fixtures in the penthouse apartment were disorienting. Luxurious as it was, it felt mundane.

  She glanced up at the remaining members of the vee gathered in the kitchen. Rhys sat on a stool at the bar, hunched over with his head in his hands. Morwenna stood behind him, rubbing his back. Heat flooded Kai’s cheeks as she watched them. Rhys hadn’t even tried to talk to her since they’d gotten out of the elevator an hour ago.

  Renewed sobbing drew Kai’s gaze across the room to where Evan leaned against the counter, red-eyed, his arms around Deryn, whose shoulders shook with the force of her cries.

  Though there were more people here than Kai had seen in over a week, they were diminished. Ashem was keeping Ffion sedated. Griffith was dead. Cadoc, once again, had gone. Some of the Invisible had searched for him while Rhys, Kai and a few others retrieved things from the cave, but Cadoc was nowhere to be found.

  Kai looked back at her arms, fighting off the burn of tears. She turned her hands palm-down, grasping her knees, and studied the subtle way light played off the newly-acquired scales that peeked from below her sleeve. She ran her fingers along the swirling, sheer rainbow that reminded her simultaneously of flowers and flame until her fingers hit the bottom of her sleeve. She pushed it up a few inches.

  A chair scraped, and Kai looked up. Rhys was coming toward her, his brows furrowed. Kai tensed, torn between craving and a tiny, tingling edge of fear.

  Morwenna moved to follow him, Rhys waved her away. The couch sank as Rhys sat next to Kai. He lifted a hand, hesitated, then tugged down her left sleeve, his fingers lingering on her wrist. He touched Kai’s other arm, turning it over to examine the scar, sliding a finger along the raised red skin. Kai flinched and pulled away. It hadn’t hurt, but, unlike her indicium, the scar felt ugly and wrong.

  Rhys leaned his elbows on his knees. “You’re healing,” he murmured, too low for anyone in the kitchen to hear.

  “Looks like it.” Kai wiggled her fingers, pulling the scarred skin, and sighed. She wanted to lean against him, but something in the way he kept shooting glances back at the kitchen—at Morwenna—stopped her.

  Rhys reached out with a finger and brushed the callus on her thumb. “Thank you.”

  Kai shivered at the softness touch. “For what?”

  He raised his gaze to meet hers. “For saving my life. Again.”

  Kai opened her mouth to respond, but a muted thumping heralded Ashem’s descent down the stairs, followed by Juli. They looked almost...normal. As if they’d found something in each other that took the edge off the sadness that sliced everyone else to bloody pieces.

  “Gwaladr.” Ashem jerked his head toward the kitchen. Rhys stood and followed, and Juli settled into his spot. She gave Kai a tight smile. “How are you?”

  Kai watched Rhys go. Beyond him, Morwenna arched one eyebrow and smirked at her. Kai gave Morwenna an icy stare, then grabbed the remote and turned on the TV, mindlessly flipping through muted channels. “I’m fine.”

  Juli snorted. “Clearly—” She clamped a hand on Kai’s arm. “Go back!”

  Sighing, Kai did as she was told.

  “Stop!”

  Kai’s mouth fell open and she stumbled forward. “Mom?”

  The quiet talk in the kitchen ceased. Leila Monahan’s face took up most of the large screen, her green eyes, so like Kai’s, were red and puffy. She dabbed them with a wadded tissue, dark with tears and streaks of mascara. Words scrolled across the bottom of the screen.

  —MISSING EIGHT DAYS. JULIET KING, ALSO A STUDENT, MISSING FOUR DAYS AGO IN SAME LOCATION. AUTHORITIES SUSPECT DISAPPEARANCES ARE LINKED. KIDNAPPING—

  “The volume! Where’s the volume?” Kai groped at the sides of the TV, but it was mounted too high on the wall. “Juli, the remote!”

  Suddenly, her mother’s voice filled the room. Kai’s gaze snapped from the words to her mother’s face. “—just want to thank everyone for coming out. If they could see...how many people...” She broke off, then looked directly into the camera. “Kai, baby, if you’re watching this, we love you. I’m sorry. Come home if you can.” Fresh tears welled in her eyes, and she let out a sob. “If you have my daughter, please let her go. Let both my girls come home.”

  “Mom.” Tears burned Kai’s eyes, spilling hot and wet onto her cheeks. She touched the screen, standing on tiptoes to trail her fingers along what parts of her mother’s image she could reach. “Mom, I’m—” A sob caught in Kai’s throat. Reality came crashing back in a wave. Dragons, war, tragedy—all that belonged to someone else’s life, not hers. “I’m okay. I promise I’m okay.”

  A reporter came on the screen, looking somber. “If you’d like to help search for the missing girls, please contact...”

  Juli walked over and put her arms around Kai. Blinded by tears, Kai collapsed into her, sobbing. Suddenly, more than anything in the world, she needed to see her family. She didn’t care if Dad lojacked her car and Mom mentioned gymnastics every single day for the rest of her life. Juli smoothed Kai’s hair and made soothing sounds. Her breath hitched a few times, but she held together. Juli always held together.

  Kai took a breath, then another, taking strength from Juli’s steadiness. On the television, the news had moved on to coverage of the previous night’s football game. Her mother was gone.

  Kai straightened and wiped her eyes. Beyond Juli, Rhys stared at her as if he’d been sucker punched in the gut. They held each other’s gaze for a long moment then he turned and murmured to Deryn.

  Someone knocked on the door, an intricate rhythm of raps and rests Kai couldn’t follow. Ashem peered through the peephole and unlocked the door.

  Tane and half a dozen unfamiliar people filed in. “The sky is secure. Owain’s people didn’t follow.”

  Ashem nodded and looked to Rhys.

  “Let’s meet in the dining room. It has the largest table.” Rhys gestured toward the open space with a huge table in the center, a massive wooden slab that would seat at least a dozen people. The dragons wandered over and took seats, the newcomers standing so that members of Rhys’s vee could sit. Juli squeezed Kai’s hand and went to take a seat by Ashem.

  When Kai moved to follow, Rhys stopped her, looking troubled. “You should rest. There are bedrooms upstairs.”

  Kai looked beyond him to the others. “Why?”

  He shook his head. “If I had tim
e, I’d explain.”

  In a blink, Kai’s grief turned to rage. “You can’t just shove me in corners when I’m inconvenient, Rhys.”

  His brows drew together. “I’m doing what’s best. For you. For me. For everyone. Trust me. You should sleep while you can. You’ll be traveling sooner than you think.”

  The thought of going anywhere made Kai so tired she could melt. She closed her eyes, and visions of the past few hours flashed through her brain. Her mother’s stricken face. Griffith’s body being loaded into the SUV. Cadoc’s mangled hand. What Rhys had done.

  Kai rubbed her temples, willing away the dull beginnings of a headache. “Fine. Just...fine.” She turned her back on the meeting and walked up the stairs. A few hours of oblivion sounded like heaven, anyway.

  * * *

  “Why does she do this?” Rhys rubbed his fingers over the barely healed skin of his neck, frowning at Evan over the polished, reddish wood of the table. The blond man had a finger pressed to his ear, listening to someone—probably Harrow—on the other end of the quartz and silver communicator. The Council had just sent word. Seren, Lady Seeress, had run away from Eryri.

  Again.

  They sat in the dining room. Four of the chairs were filled with the remaining, functional members of Rhys’s vee. Well, five if he counted Juli, which he did. The other four chairs and two people standing represented half of the Invisible, a vee of elite spies and operatives. The other half was outside, guarding the hotel.

  Rhys suppressed a growl. “Blood of the Ancients, I was only gone three weeks. It didn’t take the Council long to lose her.”

  Evan shoved wheat-colored hair out of gray eyes, his glance flicking to Deryn, as it did every sixty seconds or so. “I think it was...a particularly difficult vision. We were delayed getting back to Eryri by the weather. We wouldn’t have gotten here on time if Seren hadn’t sent the Invisible out to meet us. Protector Iolani thinks she’s somewhere in North America this time.”