The Baffling Burglaries of Bath

by Leighann Dobbs

  “No,” Katherine began, but he didn’t wait long enough to listen.

  With a jaunty “I’ll bring three,” he turned on his heel and expertly navigated through the crush of round tables and patrons with jewels sparkling brighter than their gowns. His cuffs flapped as he walked toward the footman standing at attention at the side of the room. Come to think of it, they were rather ridiculous.

  Grandma Bath beamed as she beckoned Katherine and Pru closer. “Come now, I can’t hear you from over there.” Neither of them had said a word.

  Katherine smiled as she stepped closer. “It’s nice of Lord Bath to be so attentive to your needs. I don’t see many grandsons so doting.”

  “Doting?” The old woman’s smile slipped. “Smothering, is more like. I was Marchioness for thirty years before his grandfather passed. I raised four children and a dozen grandchildren. I am perfectly capable of standing on my own for a few moments.” She harrumphed and patted her hair.

  “I should say so,” Pru said, raising her chin. “We women are perfectly capable of getting on without male interference.”

  Oh dear. Neither woman cared to keep her voice down. Across the tearoom, the score of men and women whispered as they eyed their group. Including one particularly tall man in the corner, with auburn hair and an unfashionable beard.

  Katherine had never had the privilege of meeting Lord Annandale, since his estate resided in Scotland and he famously eschewed the ton, but the description matched that of the man Mrs. Burwick had described. He looked more amused than appalled, like the shorter blond dandy at his side, but Katherine was willing to wager that Pru had destroyed all chance of drawing his amorous eye.

  A fortunate thing, then, that she didn’t seem to want it.

  When Katherine returned her attention to the women, both stared at her with open curiosity. Had she missed a question? “Forgive me, I was woolgathering. Did you say something?”

  Grandma Bath’s mouth tipped up in a sly smile. “I see what’s caught your attention.”

  She did? Katherine glanced over her shoulder and bit her tongue to keep from swearing. Beyond Lord Annandale and his friend, the Marquess of Bath collected three flutes from a footman.

  “He needs to marry soon, you know. He isn’t getting any younger, and he hasn’t got an heir. Perhaps with another woman to dote on, he’ll have less time to chase after me.” She winked.

  “Ah.” For once in her life, Katherine was rendered speechless. How should she reply? The old woman couldn’t possibly be suggesting Katherine marry her grandson. Grasping for words, she said the first thing that entered her blank mind. “I’m in Bath to find Pru a husband.”

  Pru’s amused smirk fell away, replaced by a glower. She didn’t bother to hide it even as Grandma Bath turned toward her. The old lady turned back to Katherine with alacrity.

  “It’s so good of you to think of others before yourself. But you know, my dear, you aren’t getting younger either.”

  Katherine felt older the longer this conversation was prolonged. Fortunately, Lord Bath returned with the promised refreshments. He set the flutes on the table, his cuff catching the lip of one and nearly spilling it before he righted it. He handed that one to his grandmother.

  “What poison are you dripping into Lady Katherine’s ear, Grandmama? She’s in the pink of health.”

  The old woman harrumphed but took a healthy gulp of the lemonade despite her earlier protests. She half finished it, occupying her long enough for her grandson to distribute the other flutes. As he handed one to Katherine, he said, “I hear from your father that you mean to seek an independent residence. That is brave of you.”

  No, what was brave of Katherine was staying in the same house as her father and stepmother as they made no secret of their efforts to conceive an heir. She smiled thinly and sipped the tart beverage.

  Lord Bath added, “If you go through with it, I’d advise you to hire a chaperone. A woman of your stature cannot be too careful with her reputation.”

  Some days, Katherine wanted to throw dirt on her reputation herself, simply to have others stop discussing it. “I’ve managed with my maid this long, and I’m serving as chaperone now, besides. I’m no longer an eligible young debutante.”

  The marquess laughed heartily, drawing the attention of those closest. “My dear, a woman as comely as you is far from on the shelf.”

  And rich — don’t forget my dowry, now. No one else does. However, now that Katherine had signed the papers to secure the funds for her own personal use — rather than the funds being released to her husband upon her marriage — she hoped to dissuade fortune hunters from sniffing at her skirts. For all intents and purposes, she was no longer available. If she ever had been.

  “No, no, your maid simply isn’t enough protection to your reputation. You must hire a professional companion. I’ll ask around discreetly for you and see if I might find a recommendation.”

  Katherine finished her drink to keep from swearing. This was precisely the reason she went out of her way to avoid drawing a man’s eye. Most of them had strong opinions about what she should and shouldn’t do — opinions that she would never follow.

  Before she angered a friend of Papa’s, she set the flute on the table. As she leaned past Grandma Bath, the old lady whispered, “You see? Smothering. Though he means well.”

  Katherine didn’t answer. She turned to Lord Bath with a strained smile. “Thank you. Now that the weather has improved, I fear it’s time for me and Miss Burwick to take a tour of the gardens. For my health.”

  The old woman suggested loudly, “Ernest, why don’t you escort her? We can’t have Lady Katherine out there on her own.”

  I wouldn’t be alone.

  Lord Bath looked worried as he glanced between them. “Grandmama, I know you aren’t up to such exertion. I wouldn’t dream of leaving you on your own.”

  “Miss Burwick here can keep me company. She seems a sensible sort, at the very least not parading her jewels like every other ninny in here.” The feather on her hat wobbled as she shook her head. “Not that you need worry, of course. We keep a vigilant patrol on the area. Our watchmen are most capable of apprehending this thief.”

  The marquess looked pained. “Grandmama, please don’t draw attention to the matter, let alone in such a tone.”

  “Nonsense. They have nothing to fear. It’s true, I was afraid this scoundrel would scare off our patrons, but that hasn’t proven to be the case. If anything, we’ve only attracted a more daft set of visitors.”

  “Grandmama!” Lord Bath hovered near her elbow. “Perhaps you aren’t feeling quite the thing and we should return home.”

  “But Lady Katherine…”

  “Is perfectly capable of walking in the Vauxhall with Miss Burwick. Come.” He shot an apologetic look at everyone within earshot. “Please do forgive her. Lady Katherine, Miss Burwick, I hope to see you later at the Assembly Rooms? I’ve opened it on Saturdays for a second dress ball, given the prominence of the visitors to Bath of late.”

  Katherine nodded. “Of course.” She’d planned on attending tonight in any case, to discover what she could about the previous thefts and unearth suspects. However, when the old woman beamed, she wished she hadn’t agreed so readily.

  “Perhaps I’ll come tonight as well.”

  Tarnation! The very last thing Katherine needed was for the old woman to throw her at Lord Bath. She had important work to do! However was she to find the Jewel Burglar of Bath if she was destined to be distracted? She had to solve this one on her own this time, to prove to everyone she was capable.

  Especially little old ladies who thought her better suited for marriage than investigations.

  Chapter Two

  Katherine and Pru strolled all the way to the nearest hedge before Pru burst into raucous laughter. Katherine scowled. “A fine lot of help you were.”

  The other woman wiped her eyes. “I didn’t want to get in your way. It’s terribly selfless of you, to be looking after
my future before your own.”

  “If I were you, I’d mind how you treat me. I might try to arrange the match with Lord Annandale, after all.”

  Pru’s mirth disappeared like the sun in a downpour. She straightened. “You wouldn’t dare. I thought we had an agreement.”

  As a woman’s loud conversation hailed that they were soon to be interrupted, Katherine paused. She and Pru waited to one side of the path as a trio of older women passed. Lady Dalhousie, in the center, was the only person Katherine could name, having crossed paths with her once or twice in London.

  The fifty-year-old gossipmonger cared for nothing as much as she did a winding tale, true or not. As she passed, excitement flushed her round cheeks, turning them nearly as dark as the rouge she wore on her lips. Her eyes twinkled, and her manicured hands flapped as she drew attention to her neck, where a necklace of diamonds and aquamarines fell in waves reminiscent of a waterfall.

  “That scoundrel Napoleon had it commissioned for Joséphine, I’ll have you know. He wanted something to adorn her that shone as bright as his love for her.”

  To her left, the graying woman with a robust figure made little effort to hide her scorn. “If that’s so, then why doesn’t Joséphine have it?”

  Lady Dalhousie’s mouth pursed. She scoffed as she turned down the nearest path, but her voice carried. “Why would she want to keep something that reminded her of the heinous man who cast her off like a common doxy? Fortunately, we happen to have a friend in common. She gave the jewels to him, and he to me. Oh, it was the most delightful thing to receive! You see, I hadn’t expected him at all, but a storm had blown up and…”

  Katherine didn’t need her years of investigating to have honed her instincts in order to recognize Lady Dalhousie’s story for rubbish. More foolish than her blithering tale was the fact that she openly wore such expensive jewelry in the middle of the day when there was a known burglar about! What did she hope to accomplish?

  The moment she was out of earshot, Pru leaned forward and said in a hiss, “You cannot match me with Lord Annandale! What if he is the thief?”

  Linking her arm through Pru’s, Katherine turned her down the path opposite the one the trio of women had chosen. Here, the tall shrubberies rose over even their heads, the thick growth of the labyrinth walls shielding them from prying eyes. “He most likely is not the thief.”

  “You cannot possibly know that.”

  Pru had a point, but Katherine didn’t want to encourage it. Truthfully, everyone she met was a suspect until she learned more about the previous thefts and how long certain parties had been present in Bath. At the moment, all she knew had been gleaned from the news rag. Secondhand knowledge, at best.

  “Lord Annandale might be the culprit, or it might be his friend — I think I heard him called Sir Hugh.”

  Katherine bit the inside of her cheek. She hadn’t heard of Sir Hugh, but clearly Pru seemed bent on disparaging the man her mother wished her to marry. “Lord Annandale is a marquess. What possible need could he have for jewels like these? He has fortune enough to buy his own.”

  “He’s Scottish. I hear they’re all a bit wild up there.”

  Katherine pinched the bridge of her nose. “Thank Zeus your mother isn’t here to hear this.”

  “Indeed. She’d likely be defending his honor when he’s likely no better than a hulking barbarian in a fashionable jacket. Bravo on convincing her to stay behind in London, though. I don’t know if I could have done it. There aren’t many she trusts to pursue this sort of thing. She must have great confidence in you.”

  Although Pru likely meant her words to be encouraging, Katherine’s spirits flagged. This was precisely why she needed to solve this crime by her own merit without help from anyone, including Pru. Not that the young woman hadn’t been instrumental in the last case, but because Katherine’s reputation would be ruined if she claimed credit publicly. No one knew she’d been the one to capture the Pink-Ribbon Killer. Everyone simply thought she was a matchmaker.

  It was a great cover that allowed her access to house parties and balls without anyone asking questions, but she didn’t want to get a reputation for being too good at it. The very last thing she wanted to do was orchestrate love matches for the rest of her life. She was destined for far more convoluted puzzles, and she needed to prove to herself that she could solve a case on her own, even if she could never let the general public know.

  Tightly, she answered, “Yes, fortunately, your mother does seem to put great store in my ability to chaperone and make a match for you. I’d never be able to investigate properly if your mother were butting her head into my every endeavor.”

  Pru radiated smugness as if it were warmth. “Her presence would make it difficult for us to investigate.”

  Katherine raised her voice by a hair. “I’ll have to ask you to keep out of it as well. If Lord Annandale is involved, I’ll investigate the matter myself.”

  Pru’s mouth flattened, and a furrow formed between her eyebrows. “Why? I thought—”

  “It’s nothing personal, Pru. I need to do this myself.”

  “Then why bring Mr. Murphy all this way to aid you?”

  After a glance down the nearest junction to ensure they still had relative privacy, Katherine continued along the damp stone path. “His inventions are invaluable, and speaking my thoughts aloud regarding the case often helps to refine my theories.”

  Next to her, Prudence stiffened. Her footsteps fell heavy in the strained silence between them. “Very well,” she said after a moment. “If you want me to steer clear of potentially the most exciting investigation to cross my path, then you’ll have to promise me something in exchange.”

  Wary, Katherine asked, “And what might that be?”

  Her companion’s smug air returned. When her lips tilted up, they softened the sharp cast of her nose and chin. If she’d only smile more…

  “Vow not to match me with Annandale or anyone else. In fact, I want him to think of me as the very last woman he will ever marry. If you can do that, I promise to leave you be.”

  Perhaps she ought to smile less, in that case.

  “I won’t match you with Annandale against your will.” That would be a match doomed from the start, in any case.

  “Good.” Pru’s smile faded. “You will use me to help refine your theories, though, won’t you?”

  Katherine laughed and squeezed the other woman’s arm. “That, I can do. You know, Pru, you’re a lot like me.”

  “I know. That’s why we’d make a good team,” the other woman said pointedly.

  “This time, I won’t need a team. With all these ladies parading their jewels about, they’re all but begging to be robbed. All I’ll have to do is keep an eye on the proceedings and catch the thief in the act.”

  It would be the easiest investigation she’d ever conducted.

  Katherine catalogued each item as she put it in her reticule: string, since that had proven useful in place of plaster to take the size of a shoe print, a small pair of scissors, some powder and a brush for illuminating clues, a small empty vial in case she needed to sample something, a few handkerchiefs to wrap larger items, a small notebook, and — confound it, where was the pencil?

  Crack. Katherine bolted to her feet at the sounds of chewing. “Emma!”

  The pencil was rendered unusable, but the graphite could make the dog sick. Katherine bolted after the furry thief and caught her by the behind a second before she slipped beneath the narrow bed. She wagged her tail, pleased with herself, as Katherine hoisted her.

  “That isn’t for eating,” she admonished. She wedged her fingers into Emma’s mouth, checking for remnants of graphite, before she groped along the floor, one handed. She deposited every pencil shard she found on the cramped writing desk. Aside from the desk and bed, there was precious little furniture in the quaint hotel room. In fact, she had scarcely enough room to maneuver, with her trunk taking up most of the space. Once the floor no longer posed a hazard for Em
ma, she dropped her pug to the ground once more. The dog happily sniffed the area in search of other ill-gotten goods.

  Katherine checked her appearance in the handheld mirror Harriet had packed to make certain she looked presentable — presentable, not comely. After the attention Grandma Bath had bestowed upon her that afternoon, Katherine wanted to appear ordinary and unremarkable in every way. Her height and wide hips drew enough attention as it was; she did not need to compound that by battling off Grandma Bath’s unsubtle suggestions. How was she to investigate if the dowager and her grandson were following at her heels? With her brown hair tucked into a simple chignon, and wearing only the most modest of jewelry, Katherine looked utterly forgettable. Satisfied, she crossed to the door to seek the company of Harriet, who she had sent across the hall to help with Pru’s attire.

  The moment she opened the door, Emma squeezed between her legs and scurried out of sight. Maids and valets entered and exited various rooms, the pug disappearing amongst the polite chaos. As the last whisked out of sight, shutting the door behind her with a firm click of the latch, she left the corridor quiet and deserted.

  Darn! Emma might have gone anywhere. In the hope that the dog had learned how to reach the gardens, Katherine hitched her skirt above her ankles and hurried toward the staircase to the first floor. Along the way, she cocked her ears at each doorway, hoping for sounds to indicate that her pet was within. Nothing. “Where are you, Emma?”

  Whoever she terrorized, they had yet to find her. Her heart in her throat, Katherine slipped down the stairs to the silent first level, then the ground floor. When she asked a passing maid whether she’d seen a dog, she had not. As Katherine mounted the stairs again to the cramped floor containing the hotel rooms, she bit the inside of her cheek.

  At the top, Emma waited in the corridor, tail wagging. She cocked her head as if to ask, Where have you been? Katherine sank to her knees to pat her.