Becky Wicks - Before He Was A Secret (Starstruck #3)

by Becky Wicks

  'What?' Is he kidding?

  'Hear me out,' he says, turning his back on Tal as she folds her arms and gives him the stink eye. He lowers his voice so she can't hear. 'I can't write songs like you guys can, OK? We all know that, but I can play guitar. I can teach kids the right chords, and stage presence and maybe they can do what I can't someday.'

  'What happened with that competition, Travis?' Tal says loudly.

  'Nothing happened,' I say quickly. I lead Travis to the corner away from her. It took some balls for him to come here tonight in front of all of us, I do know that. If I was him I'd be burying my head in the snow someplace in Alaska. Maybe even the North Pole, waiting for a polar bear to eat me.

  'You'll have to talk to Conor,' I tell him. 'It's up to him. If it's redemption you're after...'

  'That, and the fact that I really do want to teach guitar, give something back, you know?'

  My eyes flit to Conor talking to his brother and nephew. He looks elated and animated, but once Micah finds out about his father, and his father finds out he has the cutest grandson in the world...

  'He might well be needing some help, I'll talk to him,' I say now with a sigh, and Travis smiles. A genuine smile now. One I don't think I've actually ever seen.

  'Thank you, Alabama,' he says and he looks as though a weight has been lifted off his shoulders. In a way, I'm kind of proud of him. The guy's been a jerk but I still stand by the fact that everyone deserves a second chance. If Conor can give his father one, after everything, Travis can have one, too, as long as he keeps his paws off our songbooks.

  Tal takes my elbow. 'When you're done being all weird,' she says, 'shall we play?'

  'Let's do it,' I say, and Pete hands her the violin from behind the bar with a grin, then shushes the crowd. We walk through the throng to a round of applause, to the piano. I sit on the stool ad flip the lid.

  'I have something just for you tonight,' I say, closing my eyes instead of turning around. Again I feel my father right here beside me and I smile. 'I wrote this one for someone very special in this room and I'm pretty sure he knows who he is.’

  I don't even have to turn my head to feel Conor beside me now, either. I hear his boots on the floor, then feel his reassuring hand on my shoulder. I lean into him for a second, soaking up this feeling, right now in the moment. This one moment of pure bliss. Then Tal puts the violin to her chin and together, we play.

  Do you remember

  The piano in the dark

  How you opened up the pages of the book

  And then your heart

  The keys you said are stories

  Black and white

  No shades of gray

  And we sang right through the rainbow

  Till the shadows slipped away

  And now I can sing, sing, sing, the colors of us

  Now I can sing

  Now I can sing the color of love

  You’re the color of salvation

  Red, red roses in the blue

  Took this small town girl from green

  Right through to iridescent hues

  You’re the silver lining round the cloud

  That rained on me

  And now I’m out of my tornado, seeing clearly

  Your colors set me free

  THE END.... but wait

  Want a FREE bonus chapter, including a very special song from Conor on a VERY special occasion? Plus a character named after you in my next book? Easy!

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  ALSO, MORE STARSTRUCK BOOKS ARE WAITING!

  Before He Was Famous (Starstruck #1)

  Let me guess. When you say the name Noah Lockton, you see him standing with one of a hundred guitars around his neck, glistening with sweat in the glare of the stage lights.

  You see him grinning, maybe on a pap shot, maybe snapped on a red carpet, smiling at you from the middle of a magazine. You see him in the spotlight; hot in more ways than one, right?

  You see shouting headlines, hear the shrieks of infatuated fans, visualize the vacuous presenters buffing up his ego on all those TV channels and him batting away compliments like they're bees. You see bulbs flashing, neon flickering, videos playing on loop everywhere. They're in the gym, on the seatback screens of airplanes; in your Facebook sidebar when you're messaging your friends.

  You hear his music, obviously. How could you not? It's everywhere. His voice is everywhere. You know the stats. Noah Lockton. Twenty-three. Five-foot-eleven, messy brown curls and steel-gray eyes. Pisces. You think you know him, this superstar, guitar-playing rock star.

  But there are some things you don't know about Noah Lockton.

  You don't know how proud he was that time, to have made me a cake out of Lego, mud and toothpaste. How when he was eight, he sat up in the tree house for three whole days after Prairie died. I was freaking out that if the dog fell down from heaven no one else would be as close to the sky to catch him. Noah just didn't want anyone else to see him cry. So we sat up there together, neither of us saying a word. Just holding hands.

  You don't know how crazy he made me, teaching me guitar till my fingers bled. How we perfected the art of burping the entire first Britney Spears single together after four cans of Diet Coke and convinced a radio station to put us on air.

  You don't know how his arms felt wrapped around me when my world came crashing down; how I clung to the feeling of him inside me, filling me up; bringing me back to life again when all I could feel otherwise was numb.

  You don't know how we avoid the subject now.

  When we were kids, his dad said his eyes were so shiny in all my photos because of all the stars inside them.

  Noah was always going to shine.

  He was always going to be mine.

  But sometimes even I forget the way things were before he was famous.

  Get Before He Was Famous now

  Before He Was Gone (Starstruck #2)

  I watch Joshua pick up the spear again. The lion roars at me from his arm as he pulls the fish off the end and walks to the shore to wash them off. My eyes trace the lines of his shoulder muscles. I flashback to last night... and this morning. We couldn't get beyond PG-13 before the cameras arrived, circling the rocks in the water again like sharks.

  I wasn't exactly applying logic to my actions last night, though. Kissing him took me to another planet entirely. What if the entire U.S just saw me crushing this sand couch and now they're watching me standing here, acting like I have no clue what happened?

  Journey glowers at me. Joshua doesn't turn around. Owning up would be the right thing to do in any regular situation, yes, but everyone knows the second a couple hook up on Deserted, the others turn against you. You're viewed as a threat. I need to think. I need to talk to him, but he's turned around now and he's still not looking at anyone. Maybe we shouldn't have stayed out so late, but the more we talk the more we have to say. We'd only been asleep a couple of hours before he was waking me up and taking me spearfishing.

  Between dives this morning, Joshua told me about a guy he worked with once, out in Arizona, who lived in the desert because he was afraid of some watery abyss:

  'You know, eighty per cent of all life on this planet is under the ocean,' he said, his flecked eyes boring into me under the sun. 'The world's biggest waterfall, the biggest mountain range...'

  'Yup. And there's more historical stuff down there - more planes and boats and secrets than in all the museums in all the world,' I said, remembering my facts from school. 'We know more about space than the sea,' and he grinned. I could tell he was struggling not to kiss me and I'd be lying if I said it wasn't kind of thrilling, being desired yet unattainable at the same time.

  'True. But this guy was terrified, seriously terrified that some alien force is going to come out of the ocean someday. I helped him bui
ld a bunker, so he'd be safe.'

  'I kind of want to meet this guy,' I told him.

  'No you don't, he's crazy.'

  'Why were you there?' I asked him.

  'I had nowhere else to be,' he said.

  I feel my pulse race again. Shan's right, Joshua's a dark horse for sure. For all he says to me now when we're alone, there's so much he's not saying in front of them and it's pissing people off. But there's something that's hurting him; I can't get it out of my head. Joshua told us how Mike was defensive 'cause of his fears, but I'm guessing at times he's exactly the same. Whatever made him speak up against Stephanie's beliefs stems from something he's struggling with, alone.

  I look on as he strokes the excess sand off the fish with his fingers carefully, stares out to the horizon. Maybe I'll never know what's haunting Joshua. What if he does get voted out next? The thought sends a bolt of dread through my core but I force my head back on straight, tear my eyes away from his body. I have to stay sharp. I'm not here for a guy. I'm here for a million dollars.

  Get Before He Was Gone now

  About the Author

  Hey! I'm Becky and I've been writing for pretty much... er, well since I could hold a pen, really. My first published piece was a poem about a Christmas angel in the local newspaper, back in my English hometown when I was 10 (my dad submitted it and he was so proud - I was so embarrassed!)

  I went on to never study writing. I didn't want anyone to tell me how to do it, because then it wouldn't have been fun anymore, right? Instead I just wrote and wrote and wrote, till eventually I think people started printing my stuff, just to get me off their back!

  I landed a three-book deal with HarperCollins when I was 29 and living in Sydney. They published three funny travel memoirs about my time living and working in Dubai, Bali and South America - you can read all the stories in Burqalicious, Balilicious and Latinalicious if you like. The decision to self-publish was an experiment really, so see how much I enjoyed writing fiction, and how much I could do on my own. I'm loving it so far, but having your lovely support really means a lot, and reviews really help.

  Don't forget to review this book on Amazon!

  For book news and general silliness follow me on Twitter @bex_wicks and on my Facebook Author Page.

  You can also sign up to my mailing list on my blog, as I plan to write lots more books! Hit up beckywicks.com

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