Hope

by Tia Wylder

  “I feel like I’ve been in here for hours. How long has it been?”

  I look at my watch. “About twenty minutes.”

  She plasters on a giant grin, but screams so only I can hear her, and I burst out laughing. After she downs the champagne, she gives me her serious face.

  “Are we going to talk about it now?”

  I chuckle. “Sure. Let’s talk about it here, in the middle of a bunch of people who will determine the future of your career.”

  She waves her hand at me dismissively. “Oh, please. They don’t really care about getting to know me. They only care about whether they can package and sell me. I’ll perform, if they like me, they’ll bicker and argue over who gets to take me, and then Zachary gets to decide who is the best fit. So, forget about them for a minute. Give me the elevator pitch. What the hell did you do in the hour between looking elated and miserable?”

  Now it’s my turn to down the champagne. “Are you sure?” She nods, and I spill everything. From the beginning, all the way to the confession in the conference room. By the time I’m done, she’s waving a waitress over for more champagne, which I drink happily.

  “And what did your friend back home say?”

  “She said I have to get Zachary to tell me the truth, for Josie’s sake.”

  Bethany nods thoughtfully. “Damn straight. But listen, Ava, based on what you just told me about your sister…” We’re interrupted when a squat, bald man in glasses comes up to us to shake Bethany’s hand and tell her he loves her hair. She smiles politely, thanks him, and then turns back to me to make it clear the conversation with him is over. I can’t help but love her a little more.

  “Anyway, based on what you’ve said about your sister, I think you have to consider that she might not have been a very reliable source of information on this subject, honey. It sounds like she may have had some problems, and I certainly wouldn’t presume to know what those problems were. But for your sake, and Zachary’s, I’d give him a chance to explain. Every story has two sides, and just knowing Zachary Graham like I’ve come to… I don’t know, Ava. Everyone is different in private, but what you’ve told me doesn’t synch up with the man I’ve gotten to know.”

  I don’t have time to answer before the food starts being served. Waiters arrive with trays loaded with tiny Asian-inspired sandwiches, spring rolls, and fresh fruit skewers. I think Bethany and I are both grateful for the excuse to distract ourselves from our individual stresses with food, and we dig into to plates loaded high with a bit of everything. Out of the corner of my eye, I see Zachary turn down any food, and instead, he keeps working the room. He’s checking on people, talking to them, making sure they are happy with their food. I know Bethany and I should be doing the same, but we both need a minute to just eat and relax.

  That minute doesn’t last long though.

  Before we know it, Zachary is walking up to us, a giant, practiced smile on his face.

  “Bethany, it’s time for you to get ready to perform. Do you need anything?”

  She grabs two more springs rolls from a passing waitress and jams them in her mouth. Zachary and I both laugh.

  “No, that was it,” she says through a full mouth. Then she skips over to the stage and grabs the closest guitar, before plugging it in and sitting on the edge. Everyone turns to look at her, captivated just at her mere presence. She reaches up to wipe some stray spring roll sauce from the corner of her mouth with a chuckle.

  “I guess I was hungrier than I thought.”

  The room laughs, entranced by the fairy who is about to perform for them. Zachary stands next to me, so close, but not touching, and my whole body feels like it’s on fire. I just want to grab him and kiss him again, but I know he doesn’t want that. Not now. Not until we’ve had a chance to talk.

  Bethany tunes the guitar, then begins to sing, her voice clear and strong and sweet. Her words are passionate, and everyone is completely lost in her performance. After a few songs on the guitar, she switches to a piano and proves she’s just as skilled on that instrument. The song she sings is a rapid-fire staccato, and I can already hear it as a single on the radio. Based on the look on the record executives’ faces, they can hear it too. A few of them are on their phones, recording, texting, and sending emails. There isn’t doubt in my mind that before we leave this resort at the end of the weekend, Bethany will be signed.

  She sings the last song, then takes a bow and jumps off the stage to thunderous applause. Bethany hurries over to where Zachary and I are standing and gives us a shy smile. “I did what I could!”

  I give her a huge hug. “You were amazing, Bethany! I’ve never seen anyone so good. You’ll be a huge star.”

  Bethany shrugs. “Hey, either way, I gave it my best shot. Listen, guys, it’s been a hell of a day. Do you think anyone would be offended if I just went and got some sleep? I’m a little physically and emotionally drained.”

  Zachary leans over and gives Bethany a quick kiss on the forehead. “Go rest, honey. I’ll have some hot tea and a delicious dessert sent to you room. And don’t worry about getting up early tomorrow. Sleep in, do some swimming, just relax. I’ll find you if we need you.”

  With a wink in my direction and a second bow to the crowd in the room, Bethany spins on her heel and disappears from the room. Zachary turns to me, the same practiced smile on his face.

  “Are you ready to charm some executives and gauge their reaction to our girl?”

  I nod, excited to hear what everyone thought of Bethany’s performance. We spend the next hour or so talking to everyone in the room, and finding out what they thought of Bethany. And they loved her. Each exec seems more anxious than the last to get her on their label, which is a great sign. Some even offer Zachary contracts on the spot, which he politely turns down, as it is ultimately Bethany’s decision where she wants to sign. It’s almost midnight by the time the last executive wanders out of the dining room and, presumably, back to their room. Leaving Zachary and I standing alone, staring at each other awkwardly.

  Finally, I break the silence.

  “So, that was a hell of a night, huh?”

  Zachary smiles and grabs a leftover glass of champagne from a stray tray before drinking it down in one quick gulp. “Indeed. Shall we go out on the beach to talk? I think there is a lot to be said, Ava.”

  Oh, god. Here we go.

  Chapter Eight

  We walk out of the main hotel and wander out on to the beach that surrounds the entirety of the resort. The moon above us is huge and white and glittering, and the turquoise ocean is sparkling out in front of us. I take off my heels as we walk out on to the white sand shoreline, and I relish the feel of the crystals under my feet. If it weren’t for the lingering uncomfortableness between us, it would almost be romantic. But you can cut the tension with a knife, despite the fact all I want to do is make things better.

  Zachary pulls up two lounge chairs next to each other, and gestures for me to sit down. I take a deep breath and grab a seat, then Zachary pulls off his suit jacket and hangs it on the back of the lounge. His muscular arms are bulging through his pale purple button-down, and I try not to swoon. Now is not the time to be silly and girlish. I know whatever we’re about to talk about will be serious, and I need to focus.

  “Okay, Ava. First off, I’m going to apologize for blowing up earlier this afternoon. I think I had a right to be angry, but I didn’t have a right to yell at you or talk to you the way I did. And for that, I am sorry. I hope you can forgive.”

  I nod. “Of course. I deserved it.”

  “No, you didn’t,” he shakes his head firmly. “No one deserves to be shouted at. I spend years being screamed at and sometimes hit, in various foster homes. I know how it feels to be treated like that and I swore I would never do it. So, again, please accept my apologies and trust me when I say it will never happen again.”

  I have to wipe away tears that are forming in my eyes as I picture a young Zachary in a horrible situation like that. “I
understand. And for what it’s worth, I really am sorry for all of this. For not being honest with you from the beginning.”

  Zachary holds up his hands. “No, let’s not go back to that. You’ve said what you needed to say. Now I will say what I need to. Ava, I know that Josie was your sister and sometimes when it comes to our family, we put blinders on, so I’m not sure you knew her as well as you believed.”

  “I don’t doubt that. I’ve been wondering that for a long time,” I answer with a sad sigh. “But Zach, without any answers from someone who has been around her for these last months, I haven’t had any idea what is going on. I don’t know what was going on in her head. All I’ve had to go on is what she told me, what I read in her diary. And nothing made sense. I need you to fill in the blanks. Please.”

  “You may not like everything you hear, Ava.”

  “I don’t care,” I answer, my nerves starting to rattle. “I just need to know.”

  “Okay, then. We’ll start at the beginning. About six months ago, Donovan and I were invited to this party at a high rise in downtown Los Angeles. It was one of those rich, entitled billionaire parties where things are going on that a boring guy like me wouldn’t want any part of. But we were trading clients with another lawyer, and he insisted that we meet him there. So, we arrived, and there were a ton of beautiful women there, but I knew they were…”

  My stomach drops. I can tell he doesn’t want to say it, so I say it for him. “Escorts. I had a feeling.”

  “Right. Well, I don’t know how much you know about the men that usually attend parties like this, but they can be horrible. Especially to women. And after a few drinks, and who knows what else, some of the men started treated the ladies there like garbage. There was nothing I could do to stop it, and the escorts were holding their own. I’m sure they were used to it. But I stopped in the washroom before I left. And then I saw something I couldn’t just ignore.”

  “Josie?” I asked, knowing full well what the answer would be.

  “Josie,” he said with a nod. “One of the men from another firm had trapped her in a bedroom, and he was hurting her. I guess he thought that because she was… well… I don’t know what he thought, but he was behaving like a monster. So, I stepped in and set him straight. Maybe a little more forcefully than I should have, but I don’t abide anyone treating women that way.”

  My heart aches to imagine the things Josie went through just to survive, while I was working so hard to try and support both of us like she had done for years when I was younger. “And then?”

  “She looked so sad. So broken. I couldn’t just leave her there. So, I sat with her, and we talked for a while. She told me about her life and her baby sister who she loved more than anything in the world. I guess that was you. And she told me about some of the things she was going through. I could tell that something was… wrong.”

  I lean back in the lounge chair and let out a long sigh. “Just tell me, Zach. You don’t have to mince words.”

  He runs his hands through his hair and looks out over the ocean with wistful eyes. For a moment, I’m not sure he’ll tell me anything, but then he turns back to me, and his face is full of sadness.

  “I think she was schizophrenic. Undiagnosed. She was aggressive, delusional, paranoid, angry. She didn’t always make sense when she was telling me stories about herself. She was self-harming. And I don’t think she was even doing the escort thing because she needed the money. I think she was doing it because it helped her feel something, something she wasn’t feeling anywhere else in her life.”

  I have to choke down a sob at the thought of my sister being in so much pain but never coming to me for help. Never going to anyone for help. I use a napkin that is sitting on a side table to wipe away my tears, not caring if it’s been used. “How did you end up in her life though, Zachary? How did she end up believing… the things she believed?”

  Zachary picks up a handful of sand from the beach and chucks it in the direction of the ocean as if it will somehow make the story easier to tell. But I can already see that he doesn’t feel any better, and it’s easier to just spell the rest out all at once.

  “I didn’t want to abandon Josie when I realized something was wrong, so I gave her my number, and asked her to call me. I wanted to help her in any way I could, and at first, that is what happened. She would call me when then things were bad, and I would find her and do what I could to get her out. I’d buy her food, take her to the doctor when she’d really hurt herself, pick her up when she’d gotten into situations she couldn’t get out of. I didn’t even really think about it. I just knew I couldn’t abandon her now that I’d inserted myself into her life.”

  I take a deep breath and prepare myself to ask the first of several questions I don’t really want the answers to, but I have to know. “Did you she ever tell you anything specific about me? Did she ever bring up that you should call me?”

  Zachary shakes his head. “She was adamant that I not call you. She said you were living your own life, and working hard. She said her sister was smart and independent and didn’t need to be burdened with her problems.”

  As expected, this revelation hurts like I’ve been punched in the gut. But I have to keep going. “Okay. And why did she say… Why did she think… Did you…” I can’t seem to articulate the words, but Zachary appears to know what I’m asking.

  “I never so much as touched her. Josie was a beautiful woman, but I knew from the moment I met her that she didn’t need a lover. She needed someone to help her and protect her. I think she mistook my care for her for attraction or desire. I don’t know that, by the time I met her, she even had the ability to tell the difference. She’d been working as an escort for a while, and I think she was mistaking concern for love, and desire for concern. Ava, there is no rhyme or reason to the demons that were plaguing your sister, but I need you to understand. I need you to believe that I never would have taken advantage of her. All I wanted to do was get her the help she so desperately needed. I just think by the time I found her at that party, it was too late. I’m sorry I couldn’t be there for her. For you.”

  That was it. The last straw. I burst out crying, finally letting out all of the pain I’d felt over Josie, all of the agonies I’d felt over lying to Zachary, all of the confusion over the role I’d taken on, trying to avenge my sister. I felt like months of emotion was just pouring out of me, and there was nothing I could do to control it. Zachary reached over to me, and pulled me off my lounge and into his lap, holding me in his arms until I start to calm down until I can take a deep breath. Once I’m breathing normally again, Zachary looks down at me and whispers,

  “There is something else I need to tell you, Ava.”

  I start to panic all over again. What else could there possibly be?

  “Okay…” I respond, apprehension coloring my voice.

  “I’m in love with you, Ava.”

  Chapter Nine

  My jaw drops and I can’t stop myself from just staring at Zachary’s beautiful face. Did he really just say that to me? Did he…

  “Zachary, are you… did you say…

  Zachary laughs at my confusion. “Yes, Ava. I said I’m in love with you.”

  I shake my head. “How? I mean. We just met. And with everything that’s happened…”

  He brushes my hair out of my face with a smile. “Sometimes, you just know. And I know. I knew the moment I saw you. I knew this whole week as we were getting ready for the trip. I knew in my room this afternoon when we were together. When you meet the one you want to spend the rest of your life with, you can feel it. And I feel it with you, Ava. You’re the one for me.”

  My heart swells and all of the pain I was feeling a moment ago begins to melt into a weird combination of joy and relief. This man loves me. After everything I did. All of the trouble I caused. He loves me.

  I look up from my lap and see that Zachary is staring at me. “What?” I ask, clueless. Zachary laughs again.

  “Well,
how do you feel about me? Seeing as this side of a week ago, you were bent on destroying me and breaking my heart. Is that still your end game?”

  I shake my head in nervous panic. “Oh! No! Of course not, Zach. I love you too. I certainly didn’t expect it, and it obviously wasn’t my goal. But then I got to know you, and you are so wonderful. And kind. The way you’ve been there for Bethany. What you tried to do for Josie… You’re amazing. I never believed it was possible to fall in love so quickly, but that’s exactly what has happened. I do love you, Zachary Graham. I really do.”

  With a happy flourish, Zachary sweeps me up from my chair and carries me across the patio and on to the beach. I look around, nervously. “Zach! What are you doing?” I ask in a panic.